r/exmuslim • u/Internal_Instance458 • 10h ago
r/exmuslim • u/The-Mad-Mango • Mar 26 '26
(News) We exist… around the world: 500 ExMuslim stories mubaraaaaaak! 🥳🥳🥳
Hi community! 🥰
Taking inspiration from QueeringtheMap.com, I helped create exmuslim.me with a small team of ExMuslims last year. We launched the first ever global map of exmuslim stories as part of ExMuslim Month in December 2025.
I’m so incredibly thrilled to share that we now have 500 exmuslim stories from 233 cities and 60 countries! 🥳🥳🥳
📊 59% identify as atheists, 26% agnostic
🇪🇬 Read the 500th story from Egypt
🤗 Thank you to everyone who has shared their story already!
🤍 Share yours and help ExMuslims on their journey out of Islam: https://exmuslim.me/
Cheers! 🥂
Sammy aka Haram Doodles
r/exmuslim • u/fathandreason • Jun 03 '24
(Advice/Help) Exmuslim Guide to Living in the Closet and Coming Out.
Hello. Upon request, I've been asked to turn a comment I made into a post so that it can be a resource for more people. This post is a collection of advice I've given out about how to handle your life as a closeted exmuslim and how you'll come out in the future. It is largely based on my experience but also from what I've seen from others in this subreddit.
Introduction
So you've left Islam. You've delved through arguments, the apologetics and the bullshit and you've come to the conclusion that you no longer believe in Islam. And you may have also reached an alternative philosophical outlook on life that you can believe in.
But what now? You may have left Islam, but have you left the Muslim world? One of the most common misconceptions outsiders have is that since exmuslims are no longer Muslims, they no longer live in the Muslim world. This is painfully naive - in reality many exmuslims are closeted due to young age and financial dependency and/or live in Islamist countries or societies that enforce Islamic values. In fear of social stigma or even violence, exmuslims have to contend with closeted lives even after leaving Islam. So how do you deal with it?
Goal
The best time to come out to family is in your own home, over a dinner you paid for, alongside people who support you. That takes a lot of preparation and it means doing what you can to live your life as best as you can whilst working towards independence.
This basically means that a lot of what helps you come out of the closet will depend heavily on how well you prepared for it, so you will need to make the most of your closeted life. You may not be able to stop the shitstorm but you can at least prepare yourself to weather it. Here are some tips to achieve that goal (in no particular order)
1) Don't meander in life due to a lack of decision making skills.
Probably one of the worst mistakes I made was not realise I was an exmuslim sooner. As a result I had barely any time to prepare for when the inevitable happened and I was forced to come out. I spent a lot of my life meandering, trying to reconcile the irreconcilable, and trying to be a Muslim when I knew my values didn't align with it. I didn't really have much of a concept of exmuslims, but if I had been smarter I would have figured it out. I now tell people in a similar position that it's fine to take your time but don't take too long. Half arsing two very different cultures will leave you a loser in both.
Similarly whilst planning for independence can be scary, don’t let it frighten you into inaction. The following is a passage from this article about decision making:
Research from the 1990s led by the US psychologist Thomas Gilovich provides further evidence for why it can be shortsighted to kick a difficult decision down the road. Gilovich and his team showed that although, in the short term, people experience more regret from ‘errors of commission’ (taking an action that leads to a disappointing outcome), in the long term it is actually ‘errors of omission’ that lead to more regret – that is, disappointing outcomes that arise from not taking an action.
When taking the time to make decisions and plans, don’t underestimate how effective it can be to map out your options on an excel spreadsheet. When I had to decide whether I should come out or not, I actually made a spreadsheet listing out my options, what they would result in and what the impact would be. Actually having it written down to look at really put things into perspective. We waste a lot of our time keeping it in our heads, which forces us to recalculate everything from scratch every time we revisit our thoughts. But the more that is mapped out, the less you have to recalculate and the more you can focus on evaluation and further planning.
2) Study, career and finances.
Your studies/career is almost always your best ticket out of your toxic situation, and the one thing to prioritise the most. If you’re young, do whatever you can to ensure that you can get into further education away from home. Even if it means spending all your time at a local library. If you suspect that your parents would be against you going to a university away from home, aim for a placement at the most prestigious university you can aim for so your parents would look worse for rejecting it. The quickest and most effective way in achieving long term independence is through good studies/career.
3) Do not telegraph irreligiosity whilst being closeted.
This is particularly important for younger exmuslims because they telegraph to their parents in ways they would just not understand until they see it for themselves when they're older. Try your best to meet the religious obligations expected from your family. The more you slip, the more they will monitor you and the more difficult it will be to do the things you need to do discreetly when the time comes.
Unfortunately for girls, this usually means that wearing the hijab is a necessity and it’s inadvisable to try and get out of. (However, that subject matter is not my forte: prioritise advice from exmuslim women such as from faithlesshijabi.org)
4) Sometimes you may need to go above and beyond.
If you get the impression that your family is beginning to catch onto your apostasy then it's likely that they have and you may need to reverse that impression.
One way to do that would be to start getting books on Islam and not just for show. My advice would be to get books on Islamic history because that's the least boring stuff. Or better yet, just get whatever unapologetic salafi hate crime you can get your hands on so you can entertain yourself with how fucked up it is. Or get an annotated Qur'an like the Study Qur'an. Do something to ease their suspicions.
What book you get depends on what kind of message you want to telegraph to your parents. If you want to telegraph a message then it will need to be a paper book and not an e-book. Something that you can lay around in your room and that you know they'll see. That means you're restricted to what you can get from your local library or Masjid. Also depends on what interests you because you'll have to actually read and demonstrate you learnt from it if you want send the best message you can. If you want purely what Muslims write about Islamic history, you can check out works like The Sealed Nectar or works by al-Sallabi. If you want something a little more academic, but not something that would rouse suspicion then check out university press works like this, this, this or this. If you want something a bit more relevant to contemporary Muslim world then there books like this.
But you may find that your best bet is to just see what your local Masjid might have and see what tickles your fancy.
5) Actually coming out is usually a shitstorm.
Be prepared for lots of sobbing, guilt tripping and an inability to respect your beliefs and boundaries. Learn techniques like the Broken Record Technique to establish boundaries. Know what you have to say when they inevitably tell you to speak to a scholar - you don't have to eat the whole apple to know it's rotten. You know all that you need to know about Islam and you know even more about the world outside of Islam to put it into context.
Steel yourself with months and months of your family sending you bad dawagandist videos through WhatsApp trying to bring you back. You may have to spend months beating their attempts and going to toe to toe with them without mercy before they’re finally willing to relent and get off your back. Even then don’t expect them to relent entirely. There will always be some micro aggressions that they will resort to, like playing religious videos loudly in your vicinity. The most you can do in those circumstances is reduce contact with them as much as possible. At this point you would hopefully already be independent from them.
6) Do not feel guilt.
As an exmuslim, you will go through a lot of guilt. Whilst this does show you are human, you need to forget about guilt: you are not responsible for your parents' failure to be reasonable, not even your mother. They take responsibility for the social stigma and oppressive life they choose to live in and perpetuate. You get nothing out of that guilt. It's completely pointless and ultimately counterproductive. You can't set yourself on fire to make others warm and you gain no recognition from martyrizing yourself. Do not feel guilt for what you have to do to have a completely reasonable life. The only ones to blame are those who forced you into it.
Don't underestimate parents either. They will use guilt against you. Give them an inch and they will take a mile. They very often bring up their health problems as a weapon against you. Don't fall for it. It only affects them because they choose to let it affect them. They can choose to be reasonable. You have to respect their autonomy and let them deal with the consequences of their own ways.
7) Don't come out too soon thinking it's a release.
I come across a lot of exmuslim kids who think coming out will help explain to their religious parents why they don't want to wear the hijab or do other religious things. But the likelihood is more that those same parents will react extremely poorly and restrict your freedom even more, making it more difficult to achieve long term independence.
There's also the mistake in assuming that coming out will lead to being disowned in the vain hope that you get an quick clean break that takes all the responsibility from you. For some exmuslims this does actually work out, but for a lot of others it's miscalculated. My family didn't disown me, I still had to deal with months of my family being insufferable manipulators and the responsibility was still on me to separate from them. And for women it can be much worse.
Ultimately, if you are financially dependent on your family then coming out early will very typically result in your family using that leverage against you and making your life worse. I've seen stories of exmuslims who thought their family was better and badly miscalculated - be mindful of that.
8) Don’t panic too much if they find out.
Some exmuslims get found out, sometimes because of a snitch in the family or sometimes because they just weren’t convincing enough. Don’t panic – Muslims can be pretty damn deluded about their faith and your family will want to believe that you can come back very easily because according to them Islam is just common sense and most disbelievers are just silly and ignorant. Try to do your best to convince them as per Point 4. If it’s because you did something haram, blasphemous or otherwise worthy of takfir, try to act like it was because you were a misguided Quranist or progressive Muslim. They will still retain suspicion but it’s still better than the alternative.
However, if you’re at the point of no return and you know you can’t convince them then now is the time to make calls to any secular friends you have, ask for support and maybe even shelter.
Also for Western exmuslims, make sure to act quickly if you suspect that your parents want to send you abroad and trap you in your country of ethnic origin. Sadly some parents will go to these lengths. Do not go, no matter the cost. Find organisations willing to advise, such as those listed in Point 10. Hide your passport if you have to. Note down the contact details of your embassy in that country just in case.
9) Go no contact if you fear abuse.
Actually think about whether it's even wise for you to come out in any circumstance. Do you suspect that there could be violence or abuse? If so then you have absolutely no need to go through this stupid bullshit. Leave and don't look back. If your parents couldn't give you safe environment to even come out about different beliefs then they are not worth the time. As per Point 6 - You have to respect their autonomy and let them deal with the consequences of their own ways. This is particularly pertinent for those who live in a predominantly Muslim countries. They have a very real reason to fear persecution and absolutely do not need to risk their own lives for the sake of their parents.
10) Make use of organisations and resources.
Look into secular organisations like recoveringfromreligion.org, faithlesshijabi.org and faithtofaithless.com. Look into women's charities in your area like womensaid.org.uk or karmanirvana.org.uk (UK examples). Look into LGBT charities like rainbowrailroad.org. If you have secular school counsellors and friends then talk to them. Get advice from adults you can absolutely trust.
Note: On the flip side don't take risks with people you can’t be sure of. You may be tempted to come out to your Muslim friend, but I've seen plenty of stories of exmuslims who heavily regret doing so.
There are also informal exmuslim groups on other social media platforms such as Facebook or Discord, but be careful about how much information you share and especially be wary of private messaging.
11) You may have to leave the country.
This is particularly the case for exmuslims living in predominantly Muslim countries. Unfortunately, I don't have any real world experience to offer here but you may be able to find localised advice by digging around. For example sites like wearesaudis.net might have some information (but you'll need a VPN to access this one. If you don't know what a VPN is here's an explanation).
Are you multilingual? If you need money but working is restricted to you then you can try becoming an online language tutor on sites like italki.com (scroll to the bottom). This post and related subreddits like r/WorkOnline may help.
Note: some exmuslims in Muslim countries fall for the doomscrolling hyperbole and think Europe is “doomed” with too many Muslims. They have a tendency of asking which country is best to migrate to as an exmuslim to avoid Islam. Please ignore the doomsayers and prioritise the country you choose based on ease of access and career opportunities. As long as it is a secular country, you can worry about avoiding Islam later.
Final stuff
Shout out to Imtiaz Shams who inspired me to make this list of tips. He has his own YouTube Channel here and plans to make his own video on this subject matter so watch out for that. On a side note, I also recommend TheraminTrees YouTube Channel who delves a lot into toxic dysfunctional families from the perspective of a therapist. A lot of his content helps in dealing with the emotional impact of leaving religion and dealing with a religious family. And finally, thank you to the moderators of r/exmuslim who suggested I make this into a post. I wound up adding a lot more content lol.
I will end this post with a list of subreddits that may help you on your journey leaving Islam:
Ex related subreddits
- r/exhijabis
- r/ExEgypt
- r/ExSaudi
- r/AteistTurk
- r/PakiExMuslims
- r/ExAlgeria
- r/ExJordan
- r/MalaysianExMuslim
- r/XSomalian
- r/Atheism_Bangladesh
- r/ExSudan
- r/Xiraqis
- r/XMorocco
- r/ExBahrain
- r/ExLibya
- r/IranianExMuslims
- r/chechenatheists
- r/IndonesianExMuslim
- r/ExMuslimsKuwait
- r/exPalestine
- r/ExSyria
- r/exmusulmanfrance
Other Useful Subreddits
- r/WorkOnline
- r/Iwantout
- r/studyabroad
- r/visas
- r/UKvisas
- r/medicalschool
- r/medicalschoolEU
- r/medicalschoolUK
- r/cscareerquestions
- r/cscareerquestionsEU
- r/cscareerquestionsUK
- r/Ukpersonalfinance
- r/eupersonalfinance
- r/personalfinance
- r/Ausfinance
- r/PersonalFinanceCanada
- r/Legaladvice
- r/LegalAdviceUK
- r/LegalAdviceEurope
- r/AusLegal
r/exmuslim • u/imfeddedup • 5h ago
(Fun@Fundies) 💩 Someone asked this girl if "silence means consent "and she says eww, but as soon as the guy tells her it's from Hadith she rejects it😭
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r/exmuslim • u/Longjumping-Phase605 • 12h ago
(Question/Discussion) The UK is absolutely ruined
I am a Pakistani ex-Muslim atheist who currently lives in London. I want to share some of my experiences I have had in the UK.
1- I used to live in a student accommodation and the person at the reception didn’t know that I had left Islam. He assumed that I was a Muslim and we started talking about Islam and Sharia Law. He defended Sharia Law and cutting the hands of thieves, saying that these were laws given by God.
2- I have a friend in London who is quite liberal. She got her education from a good university and doesn’t even wear the Hijab. I was debating with her on apostasy laws and pressed her on this issue. The conversation ended with her supporting the death penalty for apostasy even though she knew herself that I was an apostate.
3- I am currently doing a tech job, and my boss was talking about religion. I asked him if he believes in secularism, and he said that he doesn’t and wants Islam to be made the state religion.
In summary, the UK is absolutely ruined. The UK has imported dangerously confused religious imbeciles by the millions and most Brits are still too stupid to see it. London currently is 15% Muslim and I can’t imagine how awful things will get as it becomes more and more like Bradford and Birmingham. I see absolutely no future to raise my children in this country, and I really want to move to Czechia. Its percentage of Muslims is 0.1% and it is extremely secular. I was born in Pakistan, and I escaped that Islamic sewer, but the UK is becoming just like that.
r/exmuslim • u/Ranya_369 • 6h ago
(Advice/Help) Everything collapse, after I refused to marry that old man...
Hi guys, I'll try to keep this as short as possible although there's a lot I could say...
I'm 24 Femal from Morocco, I have a bachelor's degree in finance, and for the past month, I've been trying to survive on my own after running away from my fathers home.
I lost my mother a while ago, and ever since then life hasn't really been the same I grew up in a very strict religious family especially when it comes to my father..
He has always been controlling, but things got much worse when he started insisting that I marry a man he knows who's almost 20 years older than me.
I barely knew this man, and the idea of spending the rest of my life with someone I didn't love, someone old enough to be my father terrified me.. But my father didn't care about what I wanted, To him it was already decided and my opinion didn't really matter... And as an agnostic girl who was trying to hide her ideas and thoughts and acting the whole time around him.
I refused multiple times, hoping he would eventually understand but instead, things became unbearable at home. The arguments turned into threats, and I started feeling like a prisoner
Eventually, I realized that staying meant accepting a marriage I never wanted, so I made the hardest decision of my life and left and he said if I stepped outside the door he won't accept me as a daughter for the rest of life..
It's been around a month now, and as I just graduated I couldn't find a decent job and couldn't even rest mentally to start thinking straight tbh
At first, I stayed with a friend for a few days, but I couldn't keep depending on her, so I moved to another city, hoping to start over somewhere nobody knew me.
And God, I had no idea how cruel the world could be to a young woman who's completely alone.
It feels like almost everyone I meet wants something from me... Some men pretend to care about my situation offer help and then eventually reveal what they're actually expecting in return
Others see my vulnerability as an opportunity to take advantage of me
I managed to find a job in a hotel but even there I couldn't feel safe.. A coworker started harassing me and I eventually resigned because I was terrified of things getting worse.
Now I'm struggling financially, emotionally, and mentally. Some days, I barely have enough energy to get out of bed, let alone figure out how I'm supposed to rebuild my entire life.
The worst part is that I've already attempted suicide twice since leaving home. I'm not proud of admitting that, but I don't want to pretend that I'm doing okay when I'm clearly not. There were moments when the loneliness, fear, and hopelessness became so overwhelming that I genuinely couldn't imagine another way out.
I keep thinking about my mother and how different everything might have been if she were still alive. Maybe she would've protected me, maybe she would've listened, or maybe I would've at least had someone to cry to when everything started falling apart.
Sometimes I even catch myself wondering whether marrying that man would've been easier than living like this. Maybe I could've endured it for a while and eventually gotten divorced I know how terrible that sounds, but when you're constantly fighting just to survive you start questioning every decision you've made.
I spent years studying, dreaming about becoming independent, building a career, and having a normal life. And now, at 24, I feel like I've lost everything before my life has even properly started.
I don't have a family to turn to, I don't have financial stability, and I'm slowly losing the little confidence I had left.
I'm not writing this to ask for just money or sympathy I just needed somewhere to let everything out because keeping it all inside is destroying me... I will be homeless at the end of this month and that make me wanna just get relieved from all this pain and put a conclusion of this suffering.
I just wanted to rest and think and look for jobs while Im in stable situation, I live now with the worst roomate u could have and even tho I'll miss having a bed and bare minimum life cuz I lost hope that I will build my life again
r/exmuslim • u/tattletalexoxo • 9h ago
(Video) This makes me so angry
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Grown men laughing at a woman’s misery. Not surprising. Kudos to this kid!
r/exmuslim • u/The-Mad-Mango • 5h ago
Art/Poetry (OC) Islamic privileges that privilege the privileged at the top 😒
r/exmuslim • u/Neat-Comment9967 • 5h ago
(Video) Never let the Islamic republic and their supporters whitewash their inhumane crimes on Iranian women! The clip below shows a few cases of the thousands that have been brutally arrested over the mandatory hijab rule!
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God knows what they do behind the public eye / cameras… (over the last few years since Mahsa Amini’s death the IR regime due to political and economic pressure has eased on the mandatory hijab rule but unfortunately there are still a few cases here and there about oppression/arrests of women!)
r/exmuslim • u/Unlikely_Yellow111 • 8h ago
(Question/Discussion) Let's celebrate the fact that a man will not lose his life over a Facebook comment first. Then let's celebrate the fact that the Ummah is weak and cannot implement the barbaric acts of 7th century today. Let's keep voicing so more and more people move away from Islamic sharia to avoid this again
Saudi Arabia's Supreme Court has set aside the death sentence handed to a Sri Lankan migrant worker over a comment he made on Facebook, Colombo's Deputy Foreign Minister Arun Hemachandra said.
A win for humanity that a man is not to be executed for a simple comment about a pedophile prophet. We still have a long way to go, but this is a good step forward
r/exmuslim • u/weathercade • 3h ago
(Video) Islamists in Japan
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r/exmuslim • u/starz_0801 • 5h ago
(Rant) 🤬 Seen some people do this, wanted to join!
I'm based in the UK but still ✌
Also, don't mind the flair, I didn't know what to use.
r/exmuslim • u/Ayan_no • 8h ago
(Meetup) Proud Ex-Muslim Pakistani 🇵🇰 based in 🇬🇧
Sorry for the bad hand writing but yes I am ex Muslim from Pakistan…
Can I have some more ex Muslims friends please?? 😭😭😭
If yes say hey in comments..
Myself
I was in Pakistan and left Islam in 2019… moved to the UK and living my new life here… still many struggles and issues but better than Pakistan lol…
r/exmuslim • u/Internal_Instance458 • 10h ago
(Advice/Help) We want freedom to speak.. If someone speak against Muhammad they are being punished in these islamic countries…
r/exmuslim • u/Equiva_Cia_2 • 19m ago
(Fun@Fundies) 💩 Religion of Ps (⚔️piece, the 😇profit & 👐pats-riarchy) or Cs (🍌cuts, the 🌘calif & child 👶merry-age) or 🤡Zafar? I can't decide!
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r/exmuslim • u/SomebodyGetAHoldOfJa • 6h ago
(Fun@Fundies) 💩 Muslims Sometimes Invent Stuff To Justify Atrocities
The original was post was about a Bangladeshi couple who will get executed for having s*x inside a mosque in Saudi Arabia.
I’m far from a Christian apologist, but I don’t think any Christian majority state would make a deal out of this, let alone sentence people to death over it.
The public would just have a good laugh about it and call it a day. At the very worst, those people would get banned from entering the church.
It looks like some Muslims lie about stuff only to make ridiculous Shariah laws look honourable.
r/exmuslim • u/Not-So-Damn2026 • 1h ago
(Question/Discussion) It irks me the most when Muslims look down at others and think they are better.
My colleague recently was trash talking about the Westerns, saying how they lead sinful lives. Drinking. Living together out of wedlock. Women wearing revealing clothes.
I told her what if they live like that? They are still living a good life. Good society, better education, social security, low crime rate and so on...
She stopped talking for a while. I thought that was the end of discussion. Then, after half an hour, she came to me and said, "They might live a better life on earth, but what about the afterlife? They will be punished later. And we will be rewarded."
I was bamboozled by her logic. I had nothing else to say. How can you argue with someone who thinks they are better than others just because they follow a weird cultish religion?
The sad thing is, she leads a secular life herself. She wears jeans, works with men, doesn’t cover her hair and very educated.
She wouldn’t live so independently if she were in her own country. Yet she fails to see the problem with her religion and its followers.
These people are delulu....
r/exmuslim • u/BackgroundRulez • 2h ago
(Question/Discussion) Moral Arguments Against Islam Are a Dead End
Attempting to debunk Islam through moral arguments is often a dead end, especially with Muslims who have strong convictions in their faith.
Whether it's slavery, concubinage, child marriage, or Muhammad's personal conduct, almost everything can be justified through divine authority, historical norms, or claims of wisdom beyond human understanding. If someone already believes Allah is the ultimate source of morality and Muhammad is the perfect example for humanity, then any moral objection can simply be dismissed.
Challenging the actual foundations of Islamic belief is far more productive.
Most Muslims don't believe Islam is true because Muhammad married Aisha at six or had multiple wives. They believe because they consider the Quran divine, preserved, and miraculous.
So challenge them on what they consider the strongest evidence for their faith. The preservation of the Quran, even if established, does not prove divine authorship. Claims of scientific miracles often rely on retrofitting modern discoveries into ambiguous verses, knowledge already available at the time, or interpretations that are simply scientifically incorrect. None of these necessarily establishes divine knowledge.
There are also historical and theological questions worth examining. Where is the original, uncorrupted Injil as described in Islamic theology? What exactly is the historical basis for the Quran's claim concerning Uzair? How should we reconcile the inheritance calculations that sometimes require awl to distribute shares?
These aren't moral objections. They raise questions about Islam's historical and theological claims, rather than whether its teachings align with an external moral standard.
Rather than endlessly debating morality, question what actually makes Islam so unshakable to them. What evidence establishes its divine origin beyond the beliefs they inherited through religious upbringing?
r/exmuslim • u/ObligationPurple560 • 49m ago
(Advice/Help) Want to move somewhere that’s muslim and Arab free zone
I’m traumatize i dont want anything that reminds me of this religion or language. Does such a place exist?
r/exmuslim • u/zhuss497 • 2h ago
(Advice/Help) Came out to my husband and trying to navigate this
Hello. Just for abit of context, I'm 27F and Pakistani from the UK. I've always had doubts regarding religion, but it's not something I've really had to face until I got married to my husband who was raised and is more practicing than I was. I've been married 4 years and we have been together 7. Within the 4 years I realised religion played much more of a role in his everyday life, which of-course it would because he's a practicing Muslim. Topics surrounding how we would make a will, how to pray, how to dress, fasting and Ramadan together came up. And throughout those conversations I'd find myself not believing in any of it, so there's been many instances I would say I don't think I believe in this and I was met with that this would end our marriage if what I'm trying to say is that I'm not Muslim, so I'd immediately take it back. I've been on a journey of trying to figure all the 'problems' I had or 'questions' I had out, Aisha's age, sex slavery, hijab, verses surrounding hitting women, just all of it, learning about Islam from the beginning to end. And at the end of it I was trying to convince myself with apologist arguments, so I felt better. But at the end I just didn't believe in it all anymore. Felt man made and made up. I finally came out to him and told him I'm no longer Muslim, don't believe in it and that's the truth. It was hard, I thought our marriage was over. After many conversation, he has said he doesn't care and wants to stay married to me, despite that our marriage maybe being nullified, or him committing a sin in Islam. Now the topic of children has come up. Thing is, I could never come out to my family. I'd always have to live as a closeted ex muslim. So I'm really struggling with that, but then wanting to be authentic will my own kids. He wants to raise the kids as Muslim, I don't. I'd want it be a choice. He wants to send them to mosque at an early age. I said no, maybe 10-11 years old. He isn't comfortable about giving them a choice to be Muslim or not. He wants to raise them Muslim. There's also the issue of, what if our kids told our families 'mum isn't Muslim'. So I'd be asking my kids to keep a secret? I don't know, the unknown the future is scary for me and for him. We're abit lost. I see myself as somewhat a strict mum, no dating until you're older, no drinking/partying til you're older. Focus on your education and hobbies and friends, so even without religion, it's some what similar on how we'd want to raise them. I don't know, now I feel like I've forgotten all the scenarios that may come up about having children together and the only thing that we seem to be fixated on is whether they'll be going to mosque or not. We can sit and talk about rules all I day, but I guess, the bigger questions is how he'd react to them choosing not to be Muslim, and how I'd react to them choosing to be Muslim. I think it makes us both feel insecure because you inevitably want your kids to think how you think, which isn't always the way it turns out (I'm a prime example). Has anyone had to deal with this? Very practicing muslim partner with an agnostic combo? How are you dealing with it? We love each other a lot, our relationship is good, we're best friends. It just shit to throw this away on something like this. Any advice would be great.
r/exmuslim • u/starz_0801 • 5h ago
(Rant) 🤬 I hate Islam's homophobia
I just got yelled at for listening to g-idle's song 'Mono'. There's a lyric that says "whether straight or gay" (the song is basically jst saying it doesn't matter ur sexuality, gender, where you are from or anything, you are still worthy of love)
I love g-idle and this song jst gives me sm confort. I got caught listening to it and lectured on how it's haram blah blah blah.
I'm a closeted bi so that pissed me off so bad. one of the things on my bucket list is to attend a pride festival once im out of here ✌
(go support g-idle, they're songs r so inclusive, welcoming and positive!)
r/exmuslim • u/User--0001 • 14h ago
(Question/Discussion) As it seems, a lot of people are being sentenced to death for blasphemy... It feels like a movement everywhere it can happen to silence people
As I said ... In the article it says there are a number of people facing the same thing there.
Everywhere the Sharia law is present, people are getting killed for "blasphemy" (not just that but also more crimes defined by Sharia laws)
Yes this happened a lot since this virus "islam" attacked humanity but this is more prevalent, or maybe talked about more now more than before. Either way, wtf.
On that note, f-ck your mimo and your allah. I hope good people that believe in this fucktard just wake the hell up.
Also if there is someone that can confirm that, tell us if there are any updates...
r/exmuslim • u/legal_law_ • 14h ago
(Rant) 🤬 I hate greeting people with salam! 😡 I hate wearing burqa and hijab! 😡 I hate LARPing as a muslim! 😡
I hate greeting people like relatives, seniors, teachers, and everyone with salam!
I HATE wearing burqa and hijab! I hate how burqa and hijab make women look demure and submissive! 🤬🤬
I want to wear button-down shirts and pants and try so many different outfits but I can't!
I hate the fact that I have to LARP as a muslim and say arabic greetings, du'as, and InshaAllah, MashaAllah, Alhamdulillah occasionally to appear as a practicing muslim! 😡
Cause we all know how dangerous openly renouncing Islam in muslim countries can be!
r/exmuslim • u/Life_Commission_4193 • 8h ago
(Question/Discussion) Here my reason why I left Islam and if you wanna debate feel free to reach out but you are not allowed to make your own version of quran interpretation.
I left Islam not because I completely reject the possibility of God, but because I started questioning whether religion itself is something humans created to explain the universe and cope with the things they don't understand.
I read the entire Quran in translation and found several verses that seemed inconsistent with modern scientific knowledge, including descriptions of embryological development, human reproduction, the Sun setting in a muddy spring, and mountains preventing the Earth from shaking.Listen Those are few thing in the quran there are lot more than those and if you are open minded gp search and find it yourself.i hadnt provided the verses as ypu could simply go to google search for the verses you will find multiple than do your research yourself.
What bothered me most was that whenever I questioned these verses, the explanations often changed, with new interpretations being offered to make them fit what we already know from science. If the Quran is truly the word of an all-knowing God, why isn't its meaning clearer in the first place?
I also don't think that a few verses that seem to match scientific discoveries prove divine authorship. Even Einstein made predictions about things that scientists understood better later, but that doesn't make his words the word of God. My point is that we should judge the Quran by the same standards we use to judge everything else, rather than treating its successes as miracles and explaining away its problems.
I believe it's possible that some higher intelligence created the universe, but I don't necessarily believe in a God who watches every action we take, answers prayers, or decides who goes to heaven or hell.
I simply haven't found convincing evidence that Islam is the truth, and I'd rather admit what I don't know than believe something just because I was taught to believe it.
r/exmuslim • u/blueapple34 • 7h ago
(Rant) 🤬 I really miss my dad.
I miss my dad.
My dad used to be such an amazing person. He was hardworking, nonviolent, well-integrated, and genuinely a good family man. He took care of himself, helped around the house, and focused on providing for his family. He always made sure he looked presentable and seemed like someone who had his life together. He was the kind of dad I could actually look up to.
Then, one day, I came back from a school trip and noticed he had grown a full beard. This was strange because he had always been strictly clean-shaven. At first, I brushed it off as him simply changing his style. I had no idea how much things were about to change.
It started with him suddenly demanding that my sister wear a hijab. Obviously, she refused, and she still doesn’t wear one. But things only got worse from there.
He became increasingly aggressive and violent, to the point where he almost got sued. He lost his job. He stopped helping around the house because apparently, everything is now “a woman’s job,” despite the fact that he’s home 24/7 doing nothing but blasting the Quran. He sends money to other Muslims because “that’s what Muslims do,” yet throws a tantrum when he has to buy his own daughter a winter jacket. He tries to force me to pray and participate in Ramadan, even though I don’t want to.
It’s like I’m watching a completely different person occupy the place of the father I grew up with.
What hurts the most is that I remember who he used to be. I remember having a dad who was responsible, caring, hardworking, and actually present for his family. Now it feels like his priorities have completely changed, and his family comes second to whatever religious expectations he’s decided to devote himself to.
I hate that something I see as a religion has seemingly taken so much of the person he used to be away from him. I hate feeling embarrassed and ashamed to be around my own father. And I hate that I can’t just have the dad I used to have back.
I know some people here have experienced much worse than I have, and part of me feels guilty even complaining because things could be so much worse. But that doesn’t change how much this hurts.
I miss my dad, and the worst part is that he’s still here. I can see him every day, but I feel like I’m grieving someone who hasn’t actually died.
I don’t know if anyone else has experienced something similar, watching a parent change so drastically after becoming more religious, but I just needed to get this off my chest.