!!!Possibly Triggering!!!!

My best friend, let's call him D is a gay man and I finally gathered the courage to finally tell him. He was the one person I was afraid to tell, maybe my subconscious was trying to warn me.

When I told D I was trans it was like he stopped seeing me as his best friend, as a human. He started to talk about my body as if I was a science experiment and said if I didn't do XYZ he wouldn't accept me.

D made it seem like me being trans was okay but only under his strict conditions. We stilled talked for a week after this but nothing was the same, today he blocked me on everything without an explanation.

How can you go from spending everyday together, to cutting someone off completely like that?

I thought he would be more understanding especially since his coming out journey was so difficult.

Why does a gay men feel the need to exclude another LGBT+ member like this I don't understand.

As a trans guy here are some of mine:

- not being able to touch my toes (makes me feel like an old man)

- wearing a towel on the waist

- drinking juice/milk straight out of the carton (gross, i know)

- opening a can

- jeans and a sports bra while getting ready (pre T)

- When cis guys dap me up

- girls saying "i know youre a guy so you dont get it but..." and talk about makeup

- paying for literally anything

- buttoning up a dress shirt

- BELTS

- messy bed

- bed head in the morning

I have soooooo much more but i wanna hear y'alls!

So, my given name is Walter. I'm the oldest of several children. The youngest is a 14 year age gap.

So, at 14 my parents asked me and my siblings for name suggestions. They wanted a name starting with W and we knew it was a girl.

I'm sitting there, blissfully unaware of a gender crisis about to hit me with a puberty shaped baseball bat.

I suggest "Winter Rose" a lovely name. My parents loved it and still to this day give me credit for it.

Now I'm sitting here, pondering a name change for the 100th time. Nothing feels good. Then I look at W names and there it is. Winter. And I'm mad. Not sure who to tell about this but I'm pissed. Not gonna steal my little sister's name. But also, I picked it.

I like my name. I always have. I just don't like how masculine it is. Winter sounds similar and it fits.

I cut through the hipster part of town today and passed a handsome guy in his late 20s. I walked past him, minding my own business, thinking my usual self-critical thoughts ("everyone around here is way hotter than me").

On a whim, I turned around to glance back... and caught him fully checking out my arse.

When I turned around, he realized I caught him, looked straight into my eyes, and flashed the warmest, sweetest smile.

.........................................

As a 46-year-old, 6-foot, 226 lbs muscle-momma with white hair and baby blue eyes, I don't usually expect that kind of open appreciation in public. But today reminded me that I AM seen, I AM attractive to people out there, and good moments happen when I least expect them. And, if it can happen to me, it can to you.

(Just feeling really happy today and wanted to pass on the good vibes!)

I was at school today, and as i was walking home, a couple of boys saw a perfume bottle in my backpack. I am not out, and they saw it and took it out and started laughing. It was embarrassing as heck, and i just dont want to be seen at all, and im crying, and I dont know what to do. i live in a small town in the southern part of the US. I dont want to exist anymore. Please, someone help

TW: Discussion related to death

I'm getting ready to change my name, and while thinking about everything it dawned on me that my deadname is already engraved on a headstone. Not exactly a great feeling, but nobody did anything wrong.

The headstone exists as it is because my parents were being considerate and planning for the future. They bought a family plot in the cemetery, worked with me, my brother, and my sister-in-law to choose a headstone, and had it engraved with all of our names. Even though thinking about it was uncomfortable, in the long run it seemed like it would make things easier.

Fast forward to today. Cancer took both my parents a couple years ago, my egg cracked, and when I visit my parents' grave I'm faced with a name I'll be leaving behind. I'm honestly not sure what to do about it. Has anyone else gone through something like this?

Never had one but want one, have updated all legal papers in NC, scared to get one that will have birth sex on it.

I have a two year old niece on my partners side that me (27MTF I've been out for 6 months) and my partner (28NB) are being told we can't see anymore. We have been the go to babysitters and have been watching her around twice a month since she was born and see her more than that. We were told that they do not want to confuse their child. They are mad that my niece called me by my name.

I only casually took notice that both parents didn't use my name and used gender neutral pronouns for me. (even though they have never used gender neutral pronouns for my partner). But they have said that they don't want to have to teach there kid about trans people.

They told me that I look like a boy and so they will teach there kids to call me by my "real" name. As soon as I look like a girl then they are ok with having my niece use my name. That anyone in there kids presence has to use my deadname and he/him.

I know that is not going to go over well with some of the liberal side of the family. And the conservative side will be cheering. But I'm worried its going to split the family in half. My partners family is pretty evenly split between conservative and liberal. With even some weird liberal people married to conservative people mixed in. (I don't know how they deal with that)

I have a feeling that they will constantly move the goalpost and create more restrictions if I don't put my foot down about this. But I love my niece. I don't want this to be an issue. I'm kind of stuck on what I do. Its my partners family but we have been friends for ten years and together for seven. I think of them as my family to. I feel so guilty being the cause of family drama.

Hi,

Like i said in the title, I have a trans son who is 14. Unfortunately I live in Texas and I'm not able to get him any type of care until he's an adult. At the moment he's still incredibly skinny but I know once puberty starts hitting harder and he fills out more in "feminine" ways it's going to hit him hard.

All of this to say that I want to start looking into getting him puberty blockers. I know that New Mexico does them for teens and I live only an hour away from New Mexico. So I was thinking we could see someone over there for his appointments. My question is if anyone knows if this is even possible? Would I be able to find a doctor for him? If so, how do I even go about that?

Thanks for any help!

I'm trans ftm, and I've started to watch a show on Disney+ called The Good Doctor cause I've watched clips of it, and I heard good things about it. So far, it's been living up to my expectations, but I just got to episode 14 of season 1, which is about a cancer patient who's a trans girl. Instead of wording it that way, it says, "identifies as a girl, but is male." Which is absolute crap cause she's not male at all. I'm really upset cause I like this show, but I don't wanna continue supporting anything that's transphobic. Is there any way I can send a report to Disney+ about this, and they could change it?

hello I’m a 16yo almost 17yo trans teen. my parents hate me. they feign care they don’t care. they’d get rid of me if they could. I hate that.

I have OCD, yes diagnosed. They weaponize it. They play into my fears and keep me oppressed with the fear of what they’ll say to me. But they’ve said enough it’s been 8 months since this has been last acknowledged. Actually 10 months now. They can’t avoid who I truly am.

what I’m getting to is I’m not afraid. I’m gonna transition. my work supports me and my friends too. I’m beautiful and I deserve love and happiness.

i’ve known for 4 years now. my parents have known for 2. I wrote a note to them about who I am and the future. I’m gonna be myself.

I'm giving it to them on Saturday. wish me luck <3

I feel like cis people are divided into a loud minority that actively wants us dead, a majority that are passively transphobic, and then the rest being genuine allies. That majority is starting to piss me off.

A trans person will fight for their rights, and a cis person will cry that their free speech is violated. A trans person will try to talk about their issues, and a cis person will claim cis is a slur. A trans person will complain about cisnormative society, and a cis person will say "not all cis people".

**Trans rights are not about cis people.** Us having rights does not affect them.

This also has a lot of overlap with other types of bigotries.

Every so often a subreddit I'm on has a pro trans post, and about half of these end up filled with cis people crying discrimination because we... what? want respect and human rights? Give me a fucking break.

I've been searching, but I can't seem to find anything for trans friendly groups or really anyone else in SW NC. Anyone besides me in that area? Haha.

Ive definitely noticed its very heavy conservative where I am, so that might affect it x.x

Sorry yall. This is gonna be a long one. I need help from the gestalt. Also I know the initial reaction after slogging through all this is to place blame at my wife. It’s not in my character to do so, so calling her out isn’t going to assist me in any way.

I’m a late thirties MtF who has repressed from a very early age. Testosterone hit me hard and I’m exactly the kind of build that I don’t want to be to transition. Tall, bulky, and hairy. I’ve repressed because I wanted a specific job and believed that if I forced myself into a role I’d be happy and the thoughts would go away. And I was. And they did. Until they didn’t. Now stuff keeps bubbling up. Little annoying things. Needless to say I’m having issues with these feelings and sought professional help. My therapist is a trans man and comparing his experiences to mine, he’s confident this is real and not based in some long lost childhood trauma. He’s confident I’ll transition at some point and present outwardly what I do on here, but hopefully less depressed. Everyone I’ve been out to has accepted it and is actively encouraging me embracing femininity more.

My issue is my wife. I love her with all my soul. Shes the mother of my two elementary aged kids. Losing any of them keeps me awake for hours if it gets in my head for even a moment at night. She’s a very open person for most social issues. She considers herself pansexual because she believes she’s attracted to the person not the body. Our relationship began very physically and is very physical even as we age. This does not mean we lack the emotional connection just this will be important later on.

My trans issues have come up during our relationship before. I was initially given a choice between her and continuing to explore. I chose her because I did and still love her more than anyone, myself included. Over time it would bubble up and I got caught covering up discussing the issue with a friend. She’s more hurt that I rely on others to talk about my issues (a la the account here) but she has made it known that she is PERSONALLY not attracted to trans folx. She will support them to her death, she will protest with others for their rights and attend pride events with her rainbow pin and donate. She’s just does not find us sexually exciting when she tries to imagine it. Given the physical side of our relationship I fear it’s a death knell for everything. I don’t feel like it’s right to rip that physical attraction away from her. I find her beautiful and enjoy looking at her physical form. I offer feedback when asked. What right do I have to take that same joy from her?

She also came from a life where she had to pick herself up on her own multiple times and had those around her betray or use her. Her experience says that if she’s been wrong it’s intentional. She’s mentioned that because the issues came up and I made the decision to stay with her, that if they come up and destroy the marriage she’s going to view it as me lying to her this whole time saying I had it under control. She views it as me wasting her life with a lie when she could have been happy and content with a cis het man instead of a pretend one. It would taint all of her memories of us. It makes me outright terrified of telling her anything related to my transness now because I’m afraid it will be the straw that broke the camel’s back. I’m so terrified that I haven’t even told her I’m in therapy.

She is my world, I get panic attacks even thinking of divorce. But at the same time my therapist said he “can feel the waters changing” and has openly admitted he made notes recently “accidentally scribbling “she” when when [I was] talking about my feelings to [my therapist]. I’m dealing with the fear of losing my wife and family AND a bit of ego death as well.

What I want is someone to tell me it’s going to be ok. I want someone to tell me “here is how you talk to her so she won’t be upset”. I want to get though this awkward and painful uncertainty and move on with my life and family.

But I know that won’t happen. So please just give me your best advice, encouraging words, or even a meme to help me get through today. Today is quite possibly the worst day for me since my egg broke.

I’ve always dreamed of transitioning 🏳️‍⚧️ but I just feel like I’m not ready for that, how many of you felt the same way?

Hello. I'm a trans man, and I tried discussing transitioning and HRT to my mother today— for some context, I had already discussed gender dysphoria when I was around 13, and obviously I wasn't taken seriously, and I hoped with the years she would actually believe me.

Well, she did in a way, and it ended up with her sobbing and telling me how it felt like her daughter had died and just how I could never understand just the pain she felt for having two transgender children.

It did get to me. I really do love my mom, and seeing her feel this way about me is incredibly painful, it feels like I'm no longer her child anymore. I feel like I ruined everything between us, and I really don't know what to do to fix it or to just feel better about it.

I know this is not an original transgender experience, so if anyone has gone through this, I'd really appreciate some advice on how to get through this.

Fair warning, this is very much a dysphoria vent post. Please ignore me spiraling.

I'm in my mid 20s, and I just realized earlier this year that I am definitely at least somewhat interested in transitioning. Last week I finally bit the bullet and bought a dress online. It was such a cute dress, with button up front and an asymmetrical skirt cut, and little leather straps off the sides. I did my little mens to women's clothing conversions and thought I was all set. I'm a little heavy set & worried that would be the problem.

Well it wasn't. The stomach area fit fine, not a problem whatsoever. It was my barrel chest & shoulders. The curse my father gave me, to be built broad-chested like a fucking human bulldog.

I just looked at myself in the mirror, a stupid MAN trying to be something he can never be ruining this lovely dress that my worthless body will never be able to fit into because I was born wrong. Maybe if I had realized YEARS ago i could have gotten on Blockers & E, but no, no no no now I'm just a disgusting failed cross dresser almost in his 30s.

I hate myself.

This post might break rule 14, if it does I'm so sorry, I just don't have anywhere else to turn to to get this out. I feel so dejected & destroyed

Just joined a new workplace for the next 8 months. I know it's heavily LGBTQ+ positive there are even pride flags everywhere. Our job will be to do interventions in schools about gender discriminations and LGBTphobia. But I'm still really scared of coming out.

ive been identifying as trans for about a year now and have only just gotten my name changed on the school register. all my friends and family know and support me but god is this shit. i know i shouldn’t take what i have for granted but i just constantly feel sad. i feel like ive been robbed of something. i’m 5’8” now which is already considered tall for a woman. yet apparently i still have more growing to do… fun… my hands are larger than average size. i have a deep voice and i just dont know what to do. sometimes i just sit on my knees in my room and just stare at the floor. i cant cry no matter how hard i try i cant and my emotions just build and build and build and im kind of getting a bit depressed. i constantly feel like im missing out. i cant have estrogen because im not old enough. i cant grow shorter. all i can do is drink coffee and hope for the best really. sorry, i just want some sympathy❤️

I've noticed none of the posts about genderfluid individuals find traction at all, and there isn't a genderfluid flair or anything.

As someone who currently identifies as genderfluid I am wondering why this is. Does this sub just have less genderfluid people in it?

For context, this is about how my dad is basicly trying to stop me from identifying how I want to. So in like mid september I sort of came out to my dad, and his reaction was kinda worse than I expected. The first thing he did was trying to reasure me that I was male and I didn't feel like a female (which hasn't worked but he doesn't know that) then mentions that he thinks that trans people are brainwashed for some reason. I though this was his first time trying to deal with one of his kids coming out as trans but nope, in that same convosation he means how my younger out of my two older sisters came as a male when she was 12 and my dad did that same exact thing and has somehow got her to hate trans people somehow. I'm actually really confused on what to do, I can't tell my mum cause she will just tell my dad and he will do the same thing to me again.