Broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years two days ago. M19 F18 Just finished talking to her for the last time last night and saying our goodbyes and the guy she followed as soon as we broke up blocked me right after we said goodbye and wished each other luck. She was literally talking to him as she was saying goodbye to me and saying she never regretted us or meeting me.

There’s a lot of context to how it ended up like this so i’ll leave a TL;DR at the bottom to save some of you time.

When I met her she was just a girl in class with tourette’s that was always shouting cuss words and everyone was laughing at her. But I always thought it was cool how she kept her composure through the states and awkward silence. I didn’t even have a crush on her but I did want to get to know her. I sometimes looked over to see if she was looking at me in class and I never caught her looking but once. One day she left her pastel pink marker on my desk to see if I would bring it to her and say hi and I did before the bell rang and then from that day of school on we started talking more and then holding hands and then I met her family and everything was perfect we did everything together.

Then I started to fuck things up a little. I began drinking around the halfway mark of the relationship, hiding it, knowing she would’ve hated to even think that because her family has a history of it. I did it because a buddy of mine were hanging out and smoking which she didn’t even care about it was just she thought drinking was gross and pathetic based off what she’s seen with her own family. So me and my friend smoked whenever we hung out and he got a bottle of vodka one day and we smashed it and I got so drunk I could barely walk up the stairs and actually fell asleep I think like halfway up the stairs to go piss. Sounds fucking miserable, but I actually enjoyed it and started to sneak it a little more at home off of my parents. Then around a month before graduation, halfway into our relationship, I bought my first bottle and it was downhill from there I was still very functional and never appeared hungover and honestly didn’t feel it but I was spending $60 a week on vodka for a long time. Anyways, this also made me less present with people including my girlfriend, I was still there and pretty much the same trust me, but I would call her less and skip some nights to say goodnight because I was drinking and was doing it to cover up that it the relationship began feeling stale so instead in a way I cheated on her with alcohol. I could be sitting on the couch next to her and still be in my own little world.

Obviously this was a catalyst, on top of the fact that 2 months ago I moved to florida. The first month was fine but she seemed to hate the distance and complained about it constantly whilst still managing to be loving and wondering about my day. But she was already checking out. I think when she realized this was real and she wasn’t gonna be able to see me again and I was already neglecting her sometimes and showing less interest, she began to grieve and accept it just wasn’t going to work for her, although I managed it very well and we even had a trip for thanksgiving planned so she could see my new house for a few days.

We hung out once two weeks ago and I never noticed anything at all until now but she seemed more reclusive and instead of running to hug me she just wrapped her arms around me and kissed me. Which is weird because when we don’t see each other for a while she’s been the type to be very excited. It was a grueling 10 hour drive I made for her. She seemed to really value the time we were having but there was just this small part of her that felt like it had changed somehow.

She asked for a break a week ago and it was for a few days and I was confused and she said it was because she hated begging for me to tell her about my day and all we said is “i miss you” and “i love you” and it wasn’t just that like we had actual conversations about what we were doing she just seemed to miss the way I used to be always checking up on her at least like every hour instead of every six hours, like I would do some days. She admitted she had been getting tired of that for months and she was “getting exhausted”, And that I “only wanted to truly change because she was at her wits end”. It hurt so bad because I felt that when I stopped showing her much attention or interest, maybe another guy came into the picture and she was already getting tired of the staleness and exhaustion of waiting for me to change? I don’t know.

We had our breakup two days ago where we stayed “friends” to see if one last time I could show the attention to her she needed. Well that didn’t work, it seemed to be okay at first but she ignored me and didn’t want to call me because her “throat hurts”. I felt absolutely played. She let a guy follow her the day we broke up that she even admitted was someone who had been trying to follow her for a long time. I told her last night basically, “listen this isn’t gonna work, i can’t sit here and be an option to you while you do what you’re doing, i’ve been more than willing to change for a while and you don’t value it and you obviously met someone so i’m not gonna wait around for you any longer” or that’s what I said in so many words. Immediately the gravity of the situation hit her and she instantly said they’re just friends and “hell, he hasn’t even reached out to me”. We still break it off at midnight because I told her I’m blocking her at that time period. She said “Goodbye, I’m never gonna regret us and maybe we’ll meet again someday”. Five minutes later, the guy she’s following blocks me. The sweet, patient, caring, funny, loud, girl I once knew is talking to another guy, and honestly probably has been for a little while now even if it just turned into something.

I feel disgust and pity when I look at her pictures, not because I feel like I wasn’t good enough, but she’s just trying to fill a void and distract herself from the fact that my old clothes are in her closet, she still has the promise ring I gave her, and our pictures are still up on her wall. It’s funny that the guy she’s talking to looks like an absolute loser too and is probably telling her he was waiting for so long to finally talk to her. It makes me sick. Her family just saw me two weeks ago and they now have to forget me too. This is a swift punch in the stomach and I hate that 3 beautiful years of my life are gone.

TL;DR— Perfect relationship for 3 years, saw changes at the end, went long distance, got emotionally cheated on I guess

Sorry for the rant, advice would be appreciated

I'm 21 and started interning at a company in Gurgaon on September 28. Today is October 16, so it's only been 18 days, but somehow I've grown attached to having this guy around.

We sat together every day, and he was one of the few people who made the office feel lighter. He was funny, joked around, and made boring or stressful days more bearable. My manager had shouted at him a few times, and I think we bonded a little over the work environment. I can't fully explain it, but I genuinely enjoyed his presence.

He was hoping to get converted to a full-time employee, but it didn't happen after he messed up a presentation to the CEO. I feel bad because he'd been given hope about the conversion and didn't really apply elsewhere. His internship was ending anyway, and he's decided to return to his hometown around Diwali. He's already stopped coming to the office. I even suggested extending his internship, but he said no. I don't know if he's embarrassed, disappointed, or simply ready to move on.

I think I only realised I liked him when it was almost over. He never really asked much about my personal life, and our conversations were mostly about work and jokes, so I don't know if I'm reading too much into things. We occasionally exchange reels, but he mostly reacts rather than continuing the conversation. I once invited him to a dandiya event, but he said he was shy and had never been to one. I still don't know whether that was a polite no or genuine awkwardness.

Honestly, I think I'll miss him more than I expected. There are only three of us girls in HR, including me, and the other two are seniors. One of them is quite toxic, so having someone around who could make me laugh made a difference. Now the thought of going to work without him feels a little sad.

I know it's only been 18 days, and maybe this sounds vague or silly because we weren't even that close outside work. But I felt something, even if I can't put it into words properly. Maybe it's a crush, maybe it's the comfort of having someone who made my days better. I just know I wish he were staying.

I want him to do well, and I know I can't ask him to stay just because I'll miss him. But I keep thinking about sending him a message saying I'd like to stay in touch, maybe even admitting that I liked him.

Would you tell him or let it go? And if you did message him, what would you say without making things awkward or putting pressure on him?

So long story short, 2 days ago I (M17) confessed my feelings to my best friend of 10 months (F19) (started developing feelings around 2 months ago which really went crazy when I got into a motorcycle accident 3 weeks ago and she was in the Hospital every other day) after she directly asked me about it in person the day before and I just gave a joking reply.

Things went as they they were bound to happen, she shut me down. We'll meet friday and talk about it in person, I'm not sure what to tell her after all of this or what to even do with myself either. Apart from drowning everything in Alcohol ontop of the Painkillers obviously, that always worked.

Anyways, what do I do? I still like her but It‘d probably eat me alive if she brought another guy right now, although Im not really sure if I could do any worse whatsoever.

I'll attach her text for anyone interested.

Hey, thank you for being so open with me. You’re very important to me as one of my best friends, and I don’t want anything to change about that. I really like and appreciate you as a good friend. You and (Mutual friend of ours) are like little brothers to me, and that just makes me happy. With you guys, I can be myself without having to worry about anything. We just get along really well, have fun, and can tease each other without hurting the other person, and I love that. I don’t want to change any of that.

I don’t want to give you false hope, and I hope you understand that. The reason I brought it up on Sunday was simply a gut feeling I had and because I was unsure. That’s why I had already been subtly trying to give you hints beforehand that we’re just friends and nothing more. Subtly, because I wasn’t 100% sure whether you might see things differently. I was afraid of hurting you, and I’m glad you’ve now brought it up so openly and that we can clear things up.

I hope you’re okay with that, and as I said, I hope we stay close friends. If there’s anything that doesn’t work for you because it’s too much, please feel free to tell me. I really want things to stay the way they are and for nothing to come between us. Your friendship means a lot to me.

We can also talk about it in person again if you’d like, so things don’t become weird or uncomfortable between us. Just tell me what you think about it

I dated this guy for only one month this past summer.

I simply cannot stop thinking about him.
Mind you I had to cut him off(and I regret it so much).

I still, cannooot stop thinking about him yo. Idk what is going on is this normal? Why does it happen? Do I confess to him?!

we have been broken up just over a month and a week or so. she met another guy maybe two weeks after the relationship and is now with him. to the point he is in her profile picture and bio on instagram. im blocked but of course i looked on an alt account. me and her were pretty on and off but the love between us always pulled us back. and this time, she really ended it i guess. the relationship wasn’t unhealthy, it was just bumpy and we had alot of things to figure out. when i first found out about the guy, i practically begged for her back and she said she’s not in love with me anymore and that most of the moments in our relationship were bad. it shocked me to my core and the pain still hurts.

i would do anything for her to somehow magically return. and i know waiting for the rebound relationship won’t do me any good but my love for that girl stops me from doing anything else. no matter what i focus on. so i guess i’m asking for advice on what you see this situation as or at least what i can do to feel better.

So it’s been a year since we last spoke. It wasn’t a relationship but it was a long situation in which I realised he had to be removed in order for me to move on, us being friends was never an option and every time I tried to explain that to him, he never got it. I truly thought he’d get it when I cried in front of him telling him how much I’m gonna miss him and thought I’d be left alone but I guess not, but it was my fault for removing him 4 months after that happened I should’ve cut him off from the moment he wasn’t going to be serious. But thankfully I had the strength to do it and I didn’t look back. But recently I’ve been remembering him in random little places and ways, I guess when you truly loved someone it’s not easy to forget them, I thought I did, but remembering just him in general doesn’t upset me anymore, I just smile to myself and move on with my day. Part of me wishes I could speak to him one last time and get the closure I feel like I need, but I know deep down I can never get closure from it. It’s just an excuse to constantly find a way to speak to him and there’s no need for it.

I'm 15m and Ive been irretrievably in love with 16f for ten years (since kindergarten). I've been working up the corage to ask her out at a concert of hers (something adjacent to school of rock) except she wasnt there... That night i asked her over text and she said that she tried to kill herself and had just gotten out of the mental hospital. We had spoken over text a little until the next day when i jokingly (not jokingly) said "you know its funny, i was going to ask you out last night". She has a boyfriend. i dont know much about him except that they've been dating since september (i found out about him oct/10) and apparently he's really hot, and doesnt really talk to his sister. I still want to be her friend unless its not the best idea?? Idk what to do... please help I'm in so much pain

To anyone that plans to get in a relationship

LOVE YOURSELF FIRST

If you want a healthy,lasting relationship,love yourself first

If not, you might be prone to toxic relationships

You are worthy of love

You deserve respect and peace

Don’t chase

You’re better than that

Go slow

Start as friends

Don’t rush anything

Communicate

I (26F)am currently living with my partner (24M). I guess my question is am I actually being toxic or being the problem in my relationship? I met my partner online through a video game and tbh we started getting along pretty quick. We share common interests and were pretty much alike in most aspects. We started talking 5 months before we actually met in person. By the time we decided to meet each other we were practically already in a committed relationship.. he told me i was his and he was mine. We always went to sleep together on the phone.. showered, ate… pretty much we lived talking on the phone til we met up. I found out once I moved in that he was with another girl 3 days before i was suppose to meet up with him… i remember that night he told me he was just going out to a car meet and i even had his location.. and that night i went to sleep trusting that he was were he said. I went through his best friend’s messages and thats where the harsh reality hit. He wasn’t there. He was with some other girl. I confronted him about it and lied about it and instead tried to turn things on me about a past relationship i told him about..

2nd thing, i asked him about yet ANOTHER female… i saw their messages everything they did .. and i felt sick to my stomach as it was within the 2 months we were talking.. and til today he continues to lie about it and once again when i bring it up he turns stuff on me. Ive been pretty open and honest about my past relationships whether it’s been ugly or pretty. Anyways i come to find out she lives next door to us.. and what was even more wild.. she called him at 6am. I tried to grab his phone to answer and he proceeded to push me and say to leave it alone. I then text her through my phone and ask her what she wants why is she calling… she proceeded to ask if she can stay in OUR HOME til someone opened the door cause she was locked out of her apartment!!! Like what world did she think that was okay???? She KNOWS ABOUT ME!!! I proceeded to block her from his phone and my phone. Later on i eventually found out he had unblocked her. Once again i confronted him and he gives me the “ youre crazy and toxic “ lines.

3rd… this goes back to me reading the texts messages between him and his best friend. I also find out that he was fucking strippers left and right. I was genuinely shocked and very disgusted. I was disgusted that i let him touch me. I never wouldve if i knew that from the start. I asked him about it and til this day he denies it even tho ive shown the screenshots and told him i know and continues to lie.

4th.. one night we had a Intense and very heated argument.. i went to work the next day feeling terrible and i called him. He kept getting mad and frustrated until he eventually put me on dnd. I come to find out he was getting mad cause i was interrupting his porn video. I was feeling terrible and guilty.. while he was fine watching porn. A week before Christmas.

Theres alot more but my conclusion is that hes been telling me im toxic and very selfish for not trusting him.. do i have all the right to feel this way.. or am i actually being toxic

She always liked when I’d sing. She told me I had a beautiful voice and I was always to shy to sing in front of her. But the few times I did, she looked at me like I was her favorite artist and she had front row seats. What I’d give to sing to you one more time L. I miss you

I never planned on meeting you.

I never got to…

Say “I do”.

Dance with you to “Save the Best for Last” at our wedding.

See your body change as our children developed in you.

Feel our baby kick.

Share your pain of childbirth.

See you nursing our children.

Do mundane things together.

Argue about the chores.

Have you pick things out of my takeout that I hate, and me pick things out of yours.

Do your brakes on a fall day as you made dinner for us.

Make you soup when you were sick.

Hold hands walking across the Costco parking lot.

Spoon you on a cool fall night while trains sound their crossing horns in the distance.

Comfort one another when our parents passed.

Tell you “I love you” before I passed on my deathbed.

I never expected to be mourning you after decades.

LAYWBL DJM LMK

What I messaged my ex this morning.

“I stayed because I felt like I owed you; for the times you were present, and for the times that i wasn't. for the times you left your heart on the table, and i left my words standing by the front door. for the times you dived deep to reach me, and i allowed myself to drown. i stayed because my thoughts held me hostage, while guilt stared me down and told me i was wrong for even considering letting go. i stayed because the time and energy we put into our connection is something we could never get back, and what kind of person would i be to let something good go to waste? but did we have something good? or did we just pretend as if we did? if everything was as rosy as we painted it to be, then why did i feel so disconnected from you? why did i feel so disconnected from “us"? but staying because you feel indebted to someone defeats the purpose doesn't it? how are you repaying the faith someone has in you by staying where you don't want to be? how are you repaying the love someone has for you by overstaying where you've outgrown? how selfish it was of me to keep dangling the possibility of forever in your face. how selfish it was of me to stay in a space where I knew I could never reciprocate fully. how selfish i was to myself, for betraying my truth and turning my back on me. i guess, sympathy has a way of jading your judgement and maybe i had been sympathetic for way too long. i stayed because i felt like i owed you, but maybe the only thing that owed myself was the happiness you never gave me”

I opened up, became vulnerable, shared how I grew up with unavailable parents and my loneliness and he called me annoying. I have been crying for the past 3 hours while he abandoned me and fell asleep.

I don’t understand what happened last year

Do whatever is best for you

Love yourself

Value yourself

I don’t understand the mixed messages

Feel your feelings

so this guy and i have been texting back and forth on instagram for maybe like 2 or so months now. we've only met twice i think those were dates. i had a lot of fun during those times and he said he did too... i might've been a little awkward at the time tho.

but he's been pretty cold these past few days. our last date was 4 days ago and we weren't really talking much after that.

should i give him space and not reach out for a while? could he just be busy? i really like him and i want to get to know him more but he's such a busy person but im willing to wait for him. i just want to know if it's even worth waiting and pursuing if he's just uninterested. i wouldn't want to accidentally pressure him too. im actually tweaking because of this but im doing everything to not let it take up all of my headspace. im feeling so deeply about all this omg. pls can it just be him?

edit: he's the best. he is so cute and is so kind the whole time we were together. i might've messed things up by being awkward and i want to make it up to him but he's not really communicating much.

And I don’t even feel hate, just love and overwhelming feeling of loss

I don't think I need to explain. It's been 2 years since we broke up and it still fucking hurts.

I was seeing a girl at the beginning of the year and everything was super fun, light, natural, and sex was good as well. We never officially dated at any point but she broke things off with me on month 4 of seeing each other. I was sad but I moved on and respected her decision.

A month later she reached back out to me saying she was confused and that she wanted to see me and have a chat. We end up sleeping together 2 weekends in a row and at this point I’m quite confused but since I’m layed back I was going with the flow.

Over the summer we texted a bunch and I even tried to see her 2-3 times which she supposedly was excited about. Every time we had a an opportunity some random excuse always came up. At that point I started to suspect something and took my distance.

Summer ends and she writes to me again and so we go out for a drink and we end up dancing, kissing, on multiple occasions. I kept trying to take her home and she denied me for unknown reasons. She later confirmed that she had been seeing someone over the summer and never knew how to tell me.

I was so hurt and the fact that she could have just told me about this guy and I would have let her go in peace. I was so frustrated about it but it’s also my fault. Fast forward to now she wants to just be friends with benefits and I also would like that but don’t know if I can separate my feelings for her. I don’t know what to do at this point and I feel broken inside. Need advice!

f(22) was seeing a m(24) since august. 2 months together we talked everyday and every night despite our busy schedules. he travelled thru cities to see me and meet me for the first time as we met online. we met again a second and third time. when we met the second time it was clear we are gonna get married. throughout the interactions we never really rushed. we started out as friends for to know each other and caught really deep feelings for each other. by the end we were truly in love. the last time i saw him a few days ago(he said i love you the first time to my face and it was a really vulnerable and special moment), after that day when i saw him we had a little conversation about his job and my studies and kids. and turns out we are incompatible bcz his job requires switching places and my study course would require me to stay at one place for 3-4 years. i told him i don’t want to have kids till late twenties(28/29/30). he said that would be a problem bcz he wants to become a dad and doesn’t want to have kids so later in life. we were on call with each other when he mentioned kids again and i told him i dont mind having kids but most of the responsibly that comes with them would be on me while i would be doing my course and he would be moving around places. and if he wants that he would have to take majority of responsibilities of raising them. then he said ‘this wont work’ and he was really clear about it and i understood what he meant there was no point in protesting. call done i texted him to clarify and he said he doesn’t want either of us to compromise and he loves me dearly yet it is what it is . i didnt say anything. i told him to never contact me again bcz i was sad and angry. we haven’t talked in two days and i dont think we will ever be talking again. us, me and him, the love we had and have is real, i thought the worst way that we could stop pursuing each other would be if we lose feelings or one of us dies and i never say this coming. i feel so hurt bcz this is the first guy i have truly loved and ive been in love with. for him im probably not the first girl. i just feel really angry and sad at how he could just leave like that and how he judged me and decided im not worth it. i’m coming to the conclusion that he loves the idea of becoming a father more than he loves me and im just not worth it despite the love. for me i dont know how to exist anymore bcz he got entangled in my life so deeply everywhere i see i see reminders of him and i dont know if i can ever remove him from my life and i at the same time dont want to remove him bcz that would just be the eternal end and i dont want to live a life where he doesn’t exist. i cant stop crying since 2 days.
if anyone has any advice or thoughts on this pls lmk!!

tldr/summary: m(24) and f(22) deeply and truly in love but he gave up on me bcz i do not want kids till late twenties