So I've recently got together with my gf and everything is honestly going great, but when it came to physical intimacy, there were some issues. Before me, she only dated guys (she outed herself as bi to me), so I'm her first lesbian relatiomship. Whenever we would get intimate, she seemed insecure. We talked about it, and after a lot of pushing her she admitted she was probably straight in the sexual sense, but biromantic still. She only realised this while dating me. On the other hand, she did say she enjoyed fingering me and all the other stuff leading up to it (making out, me touching other parts of her than genitals). I love her so much and I want ti make this work but I just don't know how to go about this or if its worth even continuing (in my head it definitely is just because I cant fathom to lose her but am I hurting myself here?). Any advice is appreciated.

So I can't help but notice some kind of trend on TikTok or social media where, in a lesbian couple, they sport gendered stereotypes. I don't mean physical appearance, but I have seen how one of the lesbians jokes about "I don't have to do that, my wife does it for me" or "I get home and I have food on the table" and the other one also works! Also how one of them is always the "slave" and keeps getting up and getting things, or cleaning behind the other person. Or the "I can't find this" and such. I know these are little examples, but you get the idea. The typical "my wife" expectancies.

Now, I know that some of these may be jokes, and that relationships are private and you don't really know what's going on yada yada, but this irks me a lot. I specially see this with masc/butch presenting lesbians. And, likewise, I also see femme presenting lesbians expecting their girlfriends to be "manly."

In my opinion, this is harmful because, for me, being with a woman means that she gets me and that she also experienced those expectancies (like getting up and cleaning the table while the men sit); so I couldn't fathom her treating me like that, or I her. I'm not talking about who does what in a house I, for example, I'm in charge of cooking because she hates it and she does laundry because I don't like it. I'm not talking about that, but about a part of the pairing picking up certain chores because of expectancies.

I want to know what other lesbians think!

I'm genuinely confused. I'm not a very outgoing person and don't flirt with girls I think are gay because of this. I'm in a friend group and we recently had two girls join us.

One of them looks very straight, she always talks about her boyfriend, stuff like that. We went out to a club as a group and she got a little drunk and told everyone how she loves making out with her female friends and if anyone was interested rn (nobody was), but how being a lesbian was disgusting and she would never want to be with a girl. Most of the people in the friend group are openly queer, so everyone was a little surprised, but the others really like her so her (homophobic) comment didn't really get reprimanded.

The other new girl looks so so queer. Tattoos, alternative hairstyle, carabiners, chunky rings, septum and other piercings, short black nails. She has RAINBOW laces on her doc martens. I really thought she was a lesbian, until a girl in the club flirted with her and she made clear (kinda aggressively) that she was straight and what the other girl was thinking and so on.

I know I cannot police what someone is wearing, but being mad that someone flirts with you when you look like a walking lesbian flag is not the vibe.

Why do all the stereotypical lesbian things get "stolen" by straight girls? How am I supposed to know someone is lesbian, and how can I signal that I'm a lesbian when everyone just looks like that? Now to mention that I'm femme and although I try, I just look straight.

(Edit)

I also can't count on a pride bracelet or anything, because the amount of straight girls that wear them because they are allies or because it's trendy is mindblowing. And if I wear to wear one, I'm scared I'll get hatecrimed.

Hey, is it weird to be attracted to women who can communicate well? Like, I know it's important for relationships but for me it's like hot in the same way a short dress is.. I'm so into self-confident, loud women they're driving me crazy.

I'm an introvert, will I ever find someone who likes that lol. Like I love going out and meeting people but I'm not someone who talks all the time and am unfortunately attracted to people who do

Do extroverted lesbians usually look for similiar people?

I can’t get stuck in a last minute plan where i’m a witch. Gimme some niche and creative suggestions

So my girlfriend and I are both 22 and have been together for about 3 years now. Our whole relationship, our sex life has been lacking. In my eyes, or at least in my opinion, I want a relationship where we’re at least trying to have sex multiple times a week. We had that at the beginning of our relationship, but now it just seems like we’re not having any sex at all. We’ve gone as long as 6 months.

First, it started out as her thinking she was asexual. Then it changed, and she said she preferred if she was prepared for sexual activity, i.e. me asking instead of springing it on her so she can be in the mood. Now it’s turned into, “Let’s have more foreplay,” and all of those things, which I was fine with.

However, we came to a point where we did open the relationship because I wanted to have more sexual experiences, seeing that I am young and that’s the life I want to live. I personally don’t want to be so young and have a sexless life in which I can’t experience what I want. But she also, at the same time, wanted to explore men, which I had to be okay with even though any woman leaving me for a man is my worst fear. But I wanted to be fair in this situation because I wanted to explore as well. The relationship today is technically still open, but I haven’t talked to any women for months because I was having terrible experiences left and right and she as well has stopped talking to men.

I’m usually a top, so I do most of the eating, if you catch my drift. For the past month or so, I’ve been asking her to trim so she can be prepared, because she wants to trim down there as her hair gets very long, and it does become a little hard for me to work because it gives me, like, mouth carpet burn, if that makes any sense. She’s been telling me that she will, she will, and she hasn’t. Obviously I don’t want to pressure her so I just let it go.

But I genuinely ask her, does she even like me or feel sexually attracted to me? Because I’ve consistently felt this way throughout our whole relationship, and she consistently handles her urges herself when it’s something I’ve been wanting to do for her forever as I love to please it’s my favorite thing to do, as I’ve told her multiple times.

I keep asking her if she is sexually attracted to me, and she just tells me that she’s too scared to trim with scissors, she won’t buy a trimmer, and I won’t let her use mine. That’s just like sharing a toothbrush to me. I love her, but lol, that’s just a boundary I have.

And I’m genuinely considering redownloading dating apps again to talk to people because, in reality, I feel really lonely and alone in this relationship, and obviously the apps aren’t forbidden.

Personally, I don’t know what to do anymore about this situation since I’ve been feeling this way for 3 years, and I’ve told her sexual intimacy is important for me in a relationship. I just feel like a burden myself for wanting this, and consistently communicating so I’m just lost.

I’m so fucking disturbed. I was working out and this visibly masc lesbian came up to me, telling me “has anyone ever told you, you look like krysten ritter?” I had one of my airpods in but, I think I was speaking at normal volume like how I usually do. She fucking proceeded to tell me word for word “lower your voice” I couldn’t control my face, I was DISTURBED. Then she was said “I was just joking” heh yeah! Anyway she continued to talk to me and ask me a bunch of personal questions like, “how long have you been training?”, “what’s your name?”, “how old are you?”, “what’s ur family name? (I’m middle eastern, it’s a normal question to ask)”. Anyway I was playing along cause frankly this is the most action I’ve gotten in a while. But now after thinking about it, I’m disgusted. Because what do you mean you come hit on me and then PROCEED to tell me to lower my voice. Ew wtf!! Am I overreacting?

Hi lesbians, I'm a 29 years old lesbian and I never had a girlfriend, I met a feel nice girls during college but after I returned to my town I never met anyone who would match me and that's not a problem to me, I feel lonely sometimes but it's cool. The thing is, I was scrolling through twitter/x and I saw a girl saying that she would never date a woman +23 years old who never had a relationship because that means they're so unbearable and toxic, and if nobody ever wanted them it's because they're trouble, and a lot of other lesbians agreed. Do you guys agree with that? I mean, everyone is allowed to like whatever they want but put everyone inside of the same box is kinda problematic in my opinion.

I am 25 years old and currently taking law school. My gf and I have been dating for 3 years now and we both agreed that we don't want to have kids in the future.

Today I was playing video games when my mom arrived with lunch takeouts and she told me that she ran into the mom of one of my former friends in highschool, let's call her B. So B and I were pretty close back then, she helped thru depression when I cut ties with my first ever situationship with a girl. B was going thru something similar back then, also moving on from a female crush and she identified as Bi. My mom told me B got married 4 years ago and has a daughter now.

I was super shocked to hear this because B always talked about wanting to put her career first the last time I heard from her was when we were in 1st year of college. We just drifted apart because she went to a different school. I did not expect her to settle down in her early 20s and here I was, still playing the same video games from highschool lol. Deep down I felt a sense of...relief??? I thought "oh god that could've been me if I gave in to my parents' expectations". Also I'm pretty sure she talked about not wanting to have kids back then because of how hard the economy is right now? B's mom also told my mom that B still wants to pursue law school (like we always planned back then) because her current job is not enough to sustain her family, even with her husband working too.

I know some people are actually happy to become moms despite the hardship, its just that the B I knew back then didn't seem like the type to settle down. She talked about wanting to travel abroad and all that, how's she gonna do that now that she has a kid? Kids are expensive as hell, especially babies. And going to law school with a kid to take care of??? I can barely pass my classes as a full time student imagine how hard it will be if you have a baby to worry about. I know this because my parents had me while my dad was taking law school and he said he suffered many sleepless nights.

This just had me wondering what the hell happened in the 5 years I lost contact with B to change her entire worldview? I know some people are happy to settle down but holy shit she is living out my worst nightmare. I don't know if she is truly happy in that setup, if she is, good for her, but hearing about her life got me scared because my parents are now asking me to "follow her example".

My parents suggested that maybe I should start dating and settle down like B once I graduate law next year. They have no idea I've already been dating my gf for 3 years now and that I am NEVER going to have kids. I feel like I still have the mentality of a child myself. In fact, when I finish law school I will: join whatever law firm that'll take me, live with my gf, and buy a pc setup so she and I can game together every night.

I'm a butch lesbian and hate how other masc lesbians can be so misogynistic. Was watching a TV show where a non-binary lesbian and they made a joke "that's why I have a wife so they can wrap for me" in a way that was clearly disparaging towards women. It makes me so sad and angry how it's a feature in our community but not much discussed

I wasn't sure if this would count as NSFW so I just marked it that way to be safe.

So yesterday my girlfriend came over and we were having sex and my nail sort of scratched her and we stopped and i just started crying and saying I was sorry over and over again. I'm not sure if it was because of how vulnerable I felt or because I hurt her or something else entirely but I'm genuinely so embarrassed. If anyone has any other ideas as to why I might have done that please let me know but I mostly just wanted to tell someone about it.

Hey guys.
I’ve been dating my gf for almost 2 years now. Now we’ve had our share of our ups and downs and even went to couple therapy, and I do acknowledge some of my faults are definitely the reason od some problems in our relationship.

The thing is, I feel like my gf is a hypocrite and gaslights me but I’m so lost that I need someone to tell me if I’m just imagining things.

The main problem is that I feel like I can enver “win” a fight. It always ends up in me apologizing to her, doesn’t matter how it started or what the problem was.

What’s worse is that she starts fights over little things, makes me apologize then she kind of throughout relatiomship tells me how i have no self esteem and its unnatractive. One day I was sleeping over at her house and she had to wake up early. I had to emergency call my friend for 2 mins at like 8 pm because my other friend was going thru some heavy stuff ( snd my gf knew about it). She basically started prohibiting me to call stating that if i call in the bathroom the neoghbours will hear and i cant call in her room cuz she told me she wanted to go to sleep. I stood up for myself and told her to stop being like annoying about it and I was quite assertive. SHE LITERALLY GOT SO ANGRY THAT SHE STOOD UP AND PUSHED ME saying ,, don’t talk to me with that tone” after that she apologized by just saying ,, sorry i pushed you” but basically said i provoked her. She sometimes furing fights gets mad and tells me stuff like she hates me and i’m the worst etc but always seems to blame me.

She also does things lkke when i text or say i love you she doesnt say it back sometimes pr says ,, thank you” but when she says it and i dont say it back then she repeats it again because she wants me to ssy it back. But when I say im sad when she doesnt say it back she says that she wants to say it when she wants to and I say it too often:D

In our whole relationship I think I almost never heard anything lkke ,, I’m sorry I didn’t want to make you feel this ways” anything i brought up something that upset me it turned against me. I really feel like I crazy person

I don’t know if anybody will read it but if you do, please write your thoughts I wokld greatly appreciate it.

Thank you

i’m crying bro wtf

Hi I have recently moved to Australia to study and have been struggling to find Arab lesbian friends here :’)