Throwaway account
I need to get some outside perspective on a difficult roommate situation. I live in an apartment where the lease does not permit pets. When I moved in, my roommate had one adult cat, which I later learned is an unspayed indoor/outdoor female. Things were generally fine with just one cat, though cleanliness and hygiene had always been somewhat of an issue. However, after I returned from a longish trip a few months ago, I discovered she had given birth to a litter of two kittens in the apartment. Thank goodness I was not around for that debacle; by the time I came home from my trip, our other roommate that had witnessed that mess was long gone. She acknowledged that the landlord is unaware of the additional cats and would not approve of them.
Initially, she agreed to move out quickly after the kittens were born, but she has dragged out the process for over two months and counting. With the holidays coming up, she might not move out for months. In the meantime, the shared living room has been largely repurposed for pet care and storage, obstructing walkways and common areas. She has open litter boxes sitting on pee pads and towels on the hardwood floor, surrounded by cleaning chemical jugs, a waste container, and paper bags. The litter tracks everywhere; on one occasion, I had to vacuum up nearly an entire canister full of stray granules. Multiple obnoxious cat tunnels and toys are scattered across the floor along with literal trash like used packing supplies and plastic bags.
The kitchen conditions have also been a mess. She regularly leaves dishes partially filled with wet cat food on the counter next to the sink for hours, and the odor affected my ability to use the sink. There was even one time she left six dishes of partially eaten spoiled wet cat food in the sink for hours, forcing me to skip dinner that night.
The cats have constant access to the counters and table, and I have observed her feeding them right on the kitchen surfaces. They also use a windowsill planter filled with dirt as a sleeping spot, which she refuses to move, resulting in soil, bark, and dirt scattered across kitchen surfaces, including the top of the microwave and the lid to the trash. Every morning before preparing breakfast, I have to sanitize the kitchen counter because it is stained with wet cat food, and the dining table and chairs frequently have dirt and soil tracked onto them.
Cat food and litter-box odors are noticeable immediately upon entering the apartment. The odor is strongest in the living room and her room whenever she leaves the door even slightly open One time, I even found cat feces sitting directly on a mattress reserved for an incoming roommate and it remained there for days.
This roommate also frequently leaves the kitchen door open for long periods to let her unspayed cat roam while she stays inside her closed bedroom. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come home for the day or downstairs to the kitchen at night to find the door wide open and not a single person in sight.
She has also interfered with necessary apartment maintenance because she is worried the landlord will discover the cats. She has discouraged submitting maintenance requests, and when a maintenance worker recently came by to install something, she complained to me afterward that it disrupted her schedule for the week (it was literally two days of work a few hours each day) and accused me of moving her stuff, which I didn’t. The stuff that she complained of being moved was directly in the way of the handyman. Who do you think moved it?
We have separate leases. I didn't grow up with cats so I know nothing about them, but after reading up on it, I've discovered that cats are real problems for landlords because they can cause major damage. Now I’m becoming increasingly concerned about long-term damage to the unit and how common area conditions might affect my standing with the landlord.
Why don’t I say something, you ask? Whenever I try, she characterizes my basic requests as burdensome and accuses me of showing her "no grace." In her text messages, she stated she was taking on a "single mother type role" with the kittens and that her "mother energy" was appealing for leeway on apartment rules. She tried to guilt-trip me for keeping my distance, claiming that choosing not to bond with her secret kittens was a "loss of a heck of a life opportunity." Beyond that, she uses pseudo-spiritual language to position herself as a guide, claiming she was triggering "truths" in me with her "healing and sharp truths." In the middle of typing that same message, she even noted hearing me from behind my closed door, writing: (“Just heard you cough, you're definitely going through a deep cleaning”).
After six full weeks of staying completely quiet about the cats, I finally reached out with a painstakingly neutral list of basic housekeeping matters—some of which didn't even involve her. Her response was an immediate, hostile wall of text. She even included explicit threats warning, “If you keep attacking my cats, my mama bear will come out,” added, “If you don't show me the same respect and consideration I've shown you, you'll find yourself losing that respect and consideration for the things that matter to you,” and concluded by telling me to take any further complaints to HR. Despite being the one violating the lease with unauthorized animals, she even had the audacity to suggest that if I didn't like the living conditions, I should be the one to move out. All this because I asked her to sweep up some litter?
I am reaching my breaking point and thinking I need to officially involve the landlord about the unauthorized pets and the apartment conditions, because I am unsure what else to do. What should I do?