Also some lightly trans colored outfits. My mom braided my hair🥰

And when they say this it’s their way of subtly saying i look like a man (some outrightly say it). had guys ask me if i’ve had “the surgery” and when did i start transitioning (assuming i am mtf). these are the same guys who say they can always tell when someone is trans btw.

i don’t see it as an insult whenever a guy thinks i’m a trans woman but it’s funny when they see an obviously feminine person and assume they are a man because they don’t possess eurocentric features. Before, this really hurt my self esteem and made me question myself and gender, but my confidence has gotten better. i know i took after my dad look wise, and know my jawline and face shape gives off a masculine look, but i like to believe i look more fem than masc.

editing this to say i appreciate the kind words, but as i grow up i am beginning to accept my androgynous appearance and the fact that i am nonbinary and don’t feel the need to perform femininity all the time. this was mainly an issue when i thought i was a binary cis woman. now that i know i’m more genderqueer it‘s not as concerning to me anymore.

i just turned 26 and felt like showing off a lil 🤩😆🤩

did some wand curls and voila ✨

Excited to see where the rest of my 20’s go 🤠

Independence is so overrated. I want to depend on someone lol. But maybe not how you’re thinking. I want to count on someone to take me out and pay for it 😭🤣 Im so tired of paying for everything myself. I don’t want a relationship(until someone makes me want one) I just wanna date for the perks that matter.

Like when you come pick me up take my garbage out too.
Please help me help you put this dining server cabinet thing together.
I want to not open that lil portfolio the check be coming in 🥺
I just did some goofy shit and the paint on my wall gotta small bubble, come fix this shit king ding a ling.

Im so tired of myself doing all this shit 😩 and all the testicle havers want to put me to work asking if I can cook or know how to give a massage 😒 no no uno reverse i dont cook shortie and I’m just trying to figure out what kinda carpentry skills you got i can exploit. At least 15 years ago they kinda did shit worth doing while being worthless.

Is this a rant? Is it a plea? Do I need bubble bath, blunt and bed? IDK this the internet and what I am is bored of being the only one dating me lol

For context, this is a costume i'm wearing to a rave. It is Vampire themed so I went with this Akasha (Queen of the Dammed) inspired look. Now i know she wears black in the most iconic scenes from the film, however, I just wanted inspiration. I chose white because during the rave, there will be a reenactment of a scene in the movie Blade where in a rave in Brooklyn, blood sprinkled from the ceiling triggering everyone's inner vampire. 🧛‍♂️🧛‍♀️ I figured it would really MAKE the costume come alive when everyone thought it just couldnt get better 😌. Oh baby! And i'll be doing vampire makeup aswell! I'll update you guys on the finished look 🤍

Hey yall🙋🏽‍♀️

I know GLP is somewhat of a controversial topic but I’d really like to know if anyone has ordered GLP-1 through services like Ro, HERS, or a medical spa?

My mom was 290lbs however she is doing the journey with her PCP & is on Zepound. She’s slowly decreasing & moving off of it bc she’s near her goal weight now. She didn’t have any crazy negative symptoms. Just some nausea and low energy the first couple months.

My insurance is shit and the pure, medical grade brands like Zepound or WeGovy are expensive. The compounded semaglutide however is cheaper - I know it won’t work as great but I’ve seen some comments on IG saying it helped.

Anyway I’m just looking for real experiences if u don’t mind sharing. Symptoms? Effective weight loss? Did it affect your Mental health? How long were you on it?
I don’t trust reviews on IG or TikTok anymore

I am genuinely curious as to why older black women in office setting gatekeep or "act" hostile towards younger black women in the workforce. I don't expect us to be friends but I expect us to be respectful and show humility towards one another since we are coworkers and spend 40 hours a week together.

I find myself time and time again in different office settings when I try to befriend older black women at work or try to get information from them (they are usually the ones who have been at the job the longest) its met with attitude, jealousy or this idea i am trying to take thier job.

One recent incident, an old black woman I work with was nice to me the first month of me being hired. We would eat lunch together, she shared her files (without me asking) and we made "inside blk ppl jokes" playful nothing serious. I was under the impression we were cool then all of a sudden about 2 months in, it felt like a switch went off in her head. She stop saying good morning to me, she distanced herself from our conversations and purposely did not introduce me to a vendor (she introduced everyone else in the department who is either White or Hispanic). I done nothing to this woman as our work barely overlap one another.

I am genuinely confused, I've been in a manger positions and been one of the longest employees at a company before and my mindset is to pass on knowledge so if I leave or not in the office no one would be lost. If there is another person of color (specifically women) in a office I want to give her all the tools she needs. In my eyes if she succeeds, I succeeded especially in office settings that are usually predominantly white.

Its usually (not for nothing) black boomers who are like this. Why?

Going to Japan for B-day for 10 days. Any recommendations or advice? If you been how was your experience?

Hi

How do you cope/ tolerante with classmates, coworkers, in-laws (basically people you have to see and interact with) being mean towards you? Honestly … like I will put myself in a bad position if I behave towards them as they are towards me, do you guys have any advice?

Hey everyone,

I work as a caregiver and I love my job how ever, has anyone liked a client but they have posters, said something, or did something to threw you off? My client is a very nice person and showed me around his apartment. Until I seen a donald trump hat and button and he was watching fox news. I'm like oh great. I'm like why do you have to be kind and treat me with respect but also be a trump supporter

I am a black woman. I was walking to the bus stop when a black man in front of me turned his head to look at me and spit on the grounding my direction. I was disgusted but not surprised

But seriously! So many people trying to coach women to be more feminine dainty and quiet and soft spoken to attract a manI think this is all wrong . Be your authentic self and you will attract the right man . But all this talk about doing your hair makeup a certain way and being more soft spoken is just gonna attract the wrong person if it’s not authentically in you
Now of course if you are naturally feminine do you! But some women can me more masculine in nature and that doesn’t mean you need to change who you are because YouTube podcast suggests it

The right man will accept you rather you have long hair short hair blue hair tattoos . Whether you are quiet or loud .
I have lots of feminine energy but masculine energy as well . I love makeup fashion and the like . But I can also be talkative feisty and loud etc. I would never date someone that didn’t accept all the parts of me .

Hey yall 👋🏾. so I am a single black female. I’m independent & live on my own. I’ve lived in a couple places, & have had some good experiences & some not. As I get older i realize what I want as far as a forever home/community. but it is hard to find something that fits our demographic. I wana feel safe but also included. I live in an area that caters to a different democraphic. and tbh I miss being around my people. I miss that inclusivity that I felt. I’m looking into moving abroad for a little bit. (Asia to be exact) just for a bit. But I’m open to anything that’s a good fit. traveling abroad just for personal reasons. But I was born n raised in the U.S. I’d like to find somewhere that feels safe. somewhere that feels like community

Hello, I’m a woman in my thirties. I’ve lived a fulfilling life and done many things I love, such as travelling, starting an organisation, and studying abroad. I’m grateful for these experiences.

However, 10 years ago, I was previously in a horrible relationship where my consent wasn’t respected, and I haven’t dated since. I also grew up in a family where my mum had relationships with men who treated her terribly.

I’ve been in and out of therapy since I was 20, and I feel like I’m finally ready to date. However, the thought of dating feels overwhelming. I tend to approach everything as a plan, and I’m panicking because I don’t know what to do, how to behave, or what to expect.

It feels strange to be in this position, and I would really appreciate advice from women who have been through something similar.

I’m officially in the 40 club. I’m grateful to have lived this long, and now I am intentionally working on living a full life. Any advice or recommendations on what an introverted extrovert could look forward to next?
My stats: married for 13 yrs, 2 daughters (11 & 10 yrs old), homeowner, 2 dogs & 1 cat, loves gardening, WFH.

My grandmother taught me how to press, we rollerset, perm/relaxer, and color my hair. Been doing my hair since high school. About 5 years ago I was introduced to a keratin treatment by a white stylist. She didn’t rinse it out and I loved it. Lasted over a year because I have 3c. Found a black stylist and she applied a keratin but her method was rinsing it out and more passes with the flat iron. In this economy I need to go back to doing my own hair.
I would like any recommendations on brands for me. 3c hair type. I typically wear the “wet look” in summer and straight (diligent durag wrapper in the winter as to not leave the house with a wet head). Can anyone recommend the keratin treatment brand…I have the appropriate shampoo and conditioner for maintenance. All feedback is welcomed. Thanks

i went natural over a decade ago but have done the big chop several times since lol. all of this growth has been from the past 1.5 years (March 2025)

pics were taken barely 48 hours apart :)

Hi,

(This story is a little long but I hope you will bare it with me)

A couple days ago I was watching a clip from a show that featured a teacher bullying a student and it reminded me of a middle school teacher I had who I'll call Mr. Smith.

For context: In middle school I was one of the only black kids at a predominantly Hispanic school. I was also the standard "type A overachiever" where grades that don't mean anything anymore meant everything to me at the time.

Mr. Smith was my orchestra teacher for a year and he was black. Our relationship started off okay, but overtime it became weird. Mr. Smith was new and he never played a string instrument (he had a woodwind background) and he made a bunch of confusing changes to his teaching style that often didn't make any sense. The kids in my section were the troublemakers of the class who often made fun of the class and disrespected Mr. Smith. While I tried to distance myself from this, Mr. Smith would lump me in with them and reprimand us. Now it such be known that EVERYONE who knew me, knew me to be "goody-goody" (yeah I know it's not a good term) and a "total teacher's pet" so a teacher reprimanding me threw me for a loop and oftentimes I would talkback and try to defend myself or I would ignore him when he was talking AT me (probably not my finest moment). A few people in my section dropped his class when we questioned him on style changes. I stayed because I loved playing my instrument and I wasn't a "quitter."

What got weird: we were prepping for all-state festival and the people in my section were getting rowdy. Mr. Smith warned our section a couple of times to stop talking and one of the guys continued to make jokes that everyone in my section laughed at and I would just smiled and shake my head. Mind you I was quiet and trying to pay attention to Mr. Smith but I guess that wasn't enough. Mr. Smith got angry and kicked my section out and I watched everyone leave. Then he pointed me and told me to leave too. When I tried to defend myself, he didn't want to hear it. He further banned us from going to the festival and didn't tell us that it would affect our grade. I had no idea what to do and wondered if I should have waited after class to talk to him again by now it was spring (March/April probably) and honestly after everything he put me through, I was tired of arguing with him.

A week later, I was having my student-parent-teacher conference and my advisor's room is next to his (we can see his classroom through a window). He sees us having our conference and at the middle end of the conference he interrupts our discussion. Throughout the conference when I first saw he smiling at me through the window, I had a sinking pit in my stomach like I knew something was going to happen. Now my advisor has no idea what's going on and assumed that he was coming over to sing praises especially after my conference was going well with "Her grades are outstanding and all of her teachers love her!" Well...not all because this man proceeds to tell my father how bad of a student I've been all year: rolling my eyes (which I NEVER DO), disrespecting him by questioning his method of teaching (which I admit to doing but not out of disrespect), and so many other things that I NEVER DID. I was in shock. My dad was in shock. My advisor was in shock. By the time he was done listing his accusations, I was sobbing and blubbering like a baby. I was so upset that I couldn't defend myself correctly and when I denied some of his accusations I just looked guilty. I ended getting up and walking away with my advisor while my dad finished talking to him. I'll never forget the disappointed lectures I received from my dad and the apology letter I was forced to write. I come from an African spanking household and over time my dad stopped spanking me when I was 10 because for the most part there wasn't any need. This was one of those times where my dad was so disgusted with my behavior, but chose not to spank me because he just didn't understand the situation.

My dad and Mr. Smith evidently decided that we start the next semester off fresh.

When I asked other kids in my section if Mr. Smith had interrupted their conferences they said no. When they found out what he did to mine they were shocked especially since they knew that I didn't intentionally cause trouble.

Most importantly, at my school teachers DON'T interrupt other teacher conferences like that. Other students who found out actively sought me out to tell me that was "messed up."

But it's fine I swallowed my pride and kept my head down for another week. But everything changed the Friday I received my quarter grades. Mind you, my grades meant everything to me back then. And of course:

The man failed me.

It was funny seeing my grades because it was:

A+ A+ A F A+ A. I just stared at my orchestra grade and finally lost it. I remember my soul leaving my body when told my science teacher that I had leave in the middle of class and walked down to the orchestra room. Mr. Smith was there and he had the nerve to smile when I asked him what was going on. He told me that since I didn't go the festival I failed. I told him that I wanted to go but he didn't let me and that it's not on his grading syballus. He said that it expected that the festival would be 90% of grade. Well...THAT WASN'T ON THE SYBALLUS and I wanted to go! We went back and forth until I gave up and asked if there was anything I could do to make up my grade. He said no and that it's all in the past and we can proceed to do as we discussed before and "start over for the last semester." I said "Yeah, no I don't think we can" and left.

I went down to the office and asked for the Vice-Principal, Ms. Linda who I assisted in the past as an office aide. I told Ms. Linda everything and she had me drop his class and told me she would look into everything. Ms. Linda was notorious for being a mean Vice-Principal but that woman went to bat for me. I found out later she and many of the teachers I had from 6th-8th grade wrote short statements in support for my grade removal in the course and I became a teacher's aide in place of orchestra.

I still played in the school Jazz band taught by my advisor and Mr. Smith (who was too pissed to even speak to me) forced me to bring back my borrowed instrument from home even though I still needed it to practice. When I asked why since there were so many instruments in storage, my advisor wouldn't look at me and said "Mr. Smith says he needs it for other students."

Fine, then mitch there you go.

The last time I saw him was my 8th grade graduation when I was fake smiling and shaking his hand after winning 2 awards and being announced as a co-valedictorian. He was not happy. I still wonder what Ms. Linda said to him, but I'll never know I'm just grateful to her.

Note: Idk if this has holds any weight, but my dad mentioned to me during that "I'm so disappointed in you" drive home that like me, Mr. Smith is first generation African American (we are not from the same African countries) and that he felt "duty bound" to let my dad know or something like that.

And umm...Mr. Smith's wife is white, which is fine but has made me wonder overtime:

Was I a victim of internalized racism or a possible internalized Microaggressive situation or am I overdramatizing the whole thing?

Edited: It's often a story that makes me reflect on the perception of my behavior and makes me doubt myself like what did I do to make this man hate me enough to do all that?

Hey,

Loving this new (to me) emergence of male audio where they're talking dirty and moaning/grunting/whatever buuuuut I'd prefer a Black man. I searched erotic ASMR "African American" and got a lot of non-erotic stuff. are there other search terms I should try or does anyone know of some creators I can start with?

This isn’t really a “vent” per se, but it’s the closest flair that I could find for what I’m talking about.

Lately, I noticed a particular sickening and disturbing trend in that whenever Black girls talk about colorism, featurism, texturism, or the privilege that comes from a proximity to whiteness, people ALWAYS react by insisting that Black girls are jealous of and bully biracial girls for their appearances. There seems to be this prevalent narrative that Black girls hate biracial girls and are jealous of them because they are closer to the beauty standard, but is this actually the case? I have never seen it in real life nor online, but so many mixed girls swear up and down that Black girls are jealous of them, and that they were constantly bullied by Black girls growing up because they were jealous that biracial girls are prettier than them.

I have also seen this with Manon of Katseye. In the group, she is meant to be the Black girl rep, and a lot of Black girls have criticized HYBE for choosing a lightskin mixed girl with features that are palatable to white beauty standards as the Black girl rep, and said that they don’t feel represented by her because of it, because she is the “acceptable” version of a Black girl in mainstream pop culture. In response, Manon fans send us death threat after death threat, slur after slur, and say that we’re just jealous of Manon because we’re dark and ugly, and she’s light and pretty. They also love putting words in our mouths, and claiming that we think that Lara(the Indian member of Katseye) is Black, just because she has dark skin, but that’s a topic for another discussion. A lot of them insist that Manon is prettier than darkskin fully Black girls, and that that’s why she was chosen to be in the group as the Black girl rep.

All of this shit just sounds like racist bullcrap to me. I want to know if I am right in believing this or if there is any actual basis behind this statement that Black girls are “jealous” of biracial girls for their looks. Have you ever heard of this stereotype, or witnessed it in your day-to-day life? How do you feel about it? I would like to hear your thoughts, cuz right now, I feel like I’m going crazy. 🤪 Thank you for reading this far, and have a nice day.

Take this question any direction you please. Id love to hear about how you thought about something when you were younger, how your thoughts changed and what prompted that change.