We met on the teenagers subreddit over 3.5 years ago and started our long distance relationship soon after, my HUSBAND 💗 visited me first in Australia early 2024 then again late 2024, again early 2025 and then I saved up and took my whole family to texas in late 2025 and early 2026 we went again and brought him home <333 we had our beautiful wedding on the 10/10/2026 (I made the date 10/10 as Americans put the month first then the day whereas in aus we do it the opposite way so 10/10/26 was easy for both families lol!

Long distance isn’t for the weak but he made it easy, we both always put in 111% effort and time, the only days we didn’t call were the days we were travelling to each-other, ever since our first message to each other we never stopped talking. He is my everything and I am so forever blessed to have him here with me throughout our happy lives together. 💗💍

My partner and I are going to be closing the distance in less than 2 weeks! We've been long distance for 4 years and 10 months so we are super excited for this!

I haven't seen him in person since July, and he's coming to visit me again on Valentine's Day. I know I only have about 4 months left but it hurts being away from him. I especially miss him right now because I have been having dreams about him. How do I stop missing him so much?

Long post sorry but please bare with me

Me (30F) and my (33M) “bf” don’t even know if we still have a relationship left. Start of September he asked for a “pause” not a break, not a breakup (I directly asked what it was and gave him those options, didn’t chose either but that exact word “just a pause).

Context to why is very long but it was personal to him, coming from months of stress, mental health battles that turn into physical health issues. And lead him to not being so communicative on our daily talks or not giving me the “attention” he would want to give me, so the relationship was causing him added stress to his current situation.

He explained all his reasons and said it’s not because of me, he still loved me and believed in us. And he put the boundary that he rather be the one reaching out, he would update me from time to time. We didn’t put a timeline to check in because it isn’t a relationship issue, but personal so how to do put a deadline to healing?

Anyway, he reached out randomly close to a week mark of every last contact, a couple of times, even two days consecutive twice. But this time feels different.

It’s been a month and a week since it started. Last “reach” was Sunday 4 of October. And it wasn’t even a conversation it was a one-time view video of something I commented on the day before when he reached out shortly, to which I reacted. Then on Wednesday I got the courage to send a funny pic of me on one time view too, it was a screenshot of a video someone else took, he didn’t do anything until the next day he reacted with a laughing face.

That’s been it for now. 11 days since he sent that video, not even an actual conversation, and his reaction to my message i wouldn’t count it. Or it does?

It’s scary and hard to believe someone you spend 7 months talking to every day can go so much without a conversation. I understand he asked for the space to heal and think.

But the last serious conversation was at the end of September, he told me he was in a bad place because of something that happened in his family. In the same conversation he tried to reassure me by saying he “never forgets me” and “still cares about me” at the moment it did reassured me, but now i wonder the choice of words, i would’ve said “i still love you” why does it feel like an ex talking to me?

How do i keep believing he loves me and is getting better, and we still have a chance? I’m trying to stay positive because it’s been hell. I have anxious attachment and have been working on it, even if i do better now it still hurts me a lot.

I’m a very empathetic person and I was there for him when all this started, supporting him and giving all the grace in the world because he is a very honest and good caring man, I do not doubt his intentions with this pause or very hard situation.

But how do I put boundaries in how long this would take or to ask for an update to protect myself, while also knowing his situation and not wanting to break his boundaries or put pressure on him to get better or give answers?

I’m so lost, I love him so much. And more than anything, I just miss him like hell.

35F. Very recently had a breakup of a LDR. It was the first time for me in a long time feeling like I'd found a fit for me. But it turned out that it was mostly the butterflies and there was no real desire to make it work. I feel betrayed, hurt, heartbroken, everything

We were supposed to meet in a couple of months for the first time. I was excited

And that's the thing. It's a special kind of grief when you lose someone you haven't met in person so you know that from the outside "it wasn't even real" but it was to you. And there's so much more grieving for something that never was than with a normal relationship

I hate it and I'm really hurting. I'll take any words of comfort or advice

Hey everyone,

My girlfriend and I have been together for around 8 months now, and we're in a long-distance relationship. I love her more than I can really put into words, and recently I've been feeling quite worried about where things are heading.

She's verbally told me that she's feeling bored at the moment, and from some of what she's said, I'm worried that she might be slowly losing interest in our relationship. Obviously, I don't want to jump to conclusions, but it's something that's been weighing on my mind.

I think part of the problem is that we've fallen into a bit of a routine. We've spent a lot of time gaming together, watching shows and movies, doing quizzes, and trying different things online. While we've had a lot of fun doing those things, I feel like we've gradually run out of things to do, and now we often find ourselves sitting on call together without really doing anything. I love spending time with her regardless, but I can understand how doing the same things repeatedly might start to feel stale.

I've been thinking that perhaps we need to be more intentional with our time together instead of just calling every day and hoping we'll find something to do. Maybe we could plan little date nights, try new activities together, have things to look forward to, or even find ways to make our time together feel a bit more special rather than just being on call out of habit.

The problem is that I'm not entirely sure how receptive she'll be to that. When I ask if she wants to do something specific, whether it's a game, a show, or another activity, the answer is generally no. I don't blame her for not wanting to do things she isn't interested in, and I don't want to pressure her into anything. But it does leave me feeling a little lost because I want to make things more exciting for us, and I'm not sure what to do when the suggestions I make aren't appealing to her.

I know that being in a long-distance relationship means we can't do all the things that couples who live near each other can do. We can't spontaneously go out for dinner, go on walks together, or just spend a day doing random things in person. So I want to make the most of the time we do have together and find ways to keep building our connection despite the distance.

I also recognise that a relationship shouldn't be about constantly entertaining each other, and I don't expect us to have some amazing activity planned every time we call. I'm just worried that we've reached a point where we're spending time together out of routine rather than genuinely enjoying that time, and I don't want us to become disconnected.

I care about her so much, and honestly, I'm scared of losing what we have. Part of me worries that I haven't been doing enough to keep things fun or that I haven't been putting enough thought into how we spend our time together. I want to put in the effort and work through this together, but I also know that I can't fix things on my own if we're both not actively involved in finding a solution.

For those of you who have been in long-distance relationships for a while, I'd really appreciate some advice:

• Have you ever gone through a phase where one or both of you started feeling bored or disconnected? How did you get through it?
• What are some genuinely fun or meaningful things you do together online that aren't just gaming or watching something?
• How do you bring back excitement and intentionality without making the relationship feel like you constantly have to plan activities?
• How do you approach this conversation with your partner without making them feel pressured or making things seem more serious than they need to be?
• And, honestly, how do you deal with the fear that your partner might be losing interest, especially when you love them so much and really want things to work?

I don't expect every day to be exciting, and I'm not looking for a magic fix. I just want to find ways for us to enjoy each other, grow together, and keep our relationship feeling alive despite the distance.

I'd really appreciate hearing about your experiences, what has worked for you, and even what hasn't.

Thank you.

I can’t wait to propose to her. I wrote my vows before we even met in person, just because I knew she was special and I wanted to promise her things and share a life in which I can deliver on those promises. Now, we have met, and we agree on a vision for our future. I can’t wait to figure out her ring size and learn what styles she likes.

She is a brilliant and independent and capable person I admire. She has a soft side that I feel lucky to know. She rarely sings or dances, but it’s precious when she does. She’s a nerd – nerdier than me. Encyclopedic knowledge of her special interests. She loves animals and lots of different rock music and she hates it when her nail polish gets chipped. She happens to be incredibly beautiful.

I got laid off from my desk job with health insurance and ran out of money, so I’ve started washing dishes in restaurants just to save up to be ready to propose. She loves and supports me even when I don’t have anything in my bank account, and because of her, I want to get serious about figuring out that bank account. I want to manage my small debts, accrue savings and buy whatever lab-grown diamond she wants. Every plate I scrub is for her.

I’m so happy this girl wants to look at rings together. I’m so touched that she tears up when we talk about it. I’m so ready to prove to her through action that her love is safe with me.

We are looking at rings when she visits this winter so that at a later time, when it makes sense, I can ask her to marry me, and I really cannot wait. She is my heart, forever.

I have a 5 hour difference with my partner, they live in the UK and I’m in the US. So they are quite far in another continent :/

I’m talking to this girl who I’ve been talking to for over a month now. Her texting and calling has always been kind of shitty but it’s gotten worse and I’ve brought up my concerns and she acknowledged them and for a week it was good. She was definitely trying more. And I appreciated the efforts. To be fair she has pretty much two full time jobs and does a lot of extracurricular activities plus friends life etc.

But this week we’re back at it. I’ll text her in the morning and I’ll hear from her maaaaybe in the afternoon. Or not even at all. And it’s typically short. Like hey so sorry. And then silence again. Calling has also become minimal maybe a ten minute call every other day or so if that. I hear her tell me how she’s gone out with friends or was having a text conversation with her group chat. It makes me second guess myself. She says she likes me a lot. But her communication is garbage. And it seems like she has time to text other people. I obviously can’t confirm that but it sure feels that way. I feel like for an LDR you’d want to communicate as much as possible to stay feeling connected? But it doesn’t feel that way. Am I too needy for an LDR? Am I overthinking it? I’m really into this girl but it’s incredibly frustrating when I get such a lack of response. I’m unsure of what to do. I don’t want to fuck this up.

We met online at the beginning of August and just spent the week together for the first time, I travelled to see her, we are both in love (I know how that sounds), I am a 2025 graduate from a good state school with a BS economics degree. For reasons I won't state here, she absolutely cannot move away from France, so it would have to be me. I've never even thought about something like this before, it's quite literally the biggest decision I would ever make, I really am in love with her though, I don't know if I'd ever meet someone like her again. She's turning 27 at the end of the year and she wants to find someone that she can settle down with in the future. I am fine with moving to a different country, but I don't know how to make this work. Do I apply to jobs directly in France? The UK (as I only speak English)? Do I apply to companies that have locations in Europe and hope to get transferred? I'm really lost, and I kind of feel hopele, please help, I can't lose her.

Me (f20) and boyfriend (m21) have been together for 3 years, tomorrow. He's my best friend and I do love him, but this last year has been so difficult, and I feel like my needs haven't been met for a long time now.

He came to me for last Thanksgiving, and we agreed that he'd stop by and stay with me for a bit on his way back to the school (i am on the east coast, of the US, he lives in Portugal, but studies on the west coast of the US)

He leaves, and I get a text in December that that plan would not be happening (not even on a phone call, it was so casual for him). We knew I'd be studying abroad in the Spring, so this meant the next possible time for that would be spring break. I asked/reminded him to look at options maybe 2 or 3 times, and nothing ever happened. I ended up spending my spring break alone in Switzerland, and had a complete blast, and I actually felt glad our meeting hadn't worked out.

Next, he wasn't able to tell me if we could meet up until less than a month before it actually happened... because of that, I had to book a flight ticket (because of Trump's war in Iran) before knowing, and we only got a week together. He couldn't come to the US this last summer, so I actually went back to spend time with him for about 2 weeks.

Both of these things were because of his Visa situation, which is the origin of a lot of our issues in planning and logistics... I understand that I'm more privileged than him in this way, because I have a powerful passport and am not a citizen of a country actively drafting people to go die. That doesn't change the reality of our relationship though, and he is not at risk for being deported back to his country of origin.

Fast forward, it's October, and we also agreed he'd come stay with me for a while this fall, since he's taking a semester off. That has and will not happen, and he never communicated it, I just kind of mentioned it in conversation, and he confirmed it with a tinge of guilt in his voice.

Now, I have utterly no desire to be the one planning our meetings and proposing ideas from now on. I feel like he takes me for granted, he never communicates in a timely way despite that fact that I've told him how important the communication is to me several times. I told myself in the spring that I wasn't going to do another 5+ month distance, and that's what's going to happen now.

I can see a future with this guy, and we're good friends, and get along super well, but he's clearly not in a space to give me what I need, and I feel like he hasn't been trying.

Even before this last year, it's been clear that he's not in a place to prioritize me in the way I deserve... even before we went long distance, I was going to join him and his brother for skiing, then the family changed their mind and I was stuck at home after turning down my best friend for a weekend in NYC together.

I could go see him this thanksgiving or during winter break, but I'd genuinely rather be with my family and ski (i live in a ski state).

Today, my life is genuinely so fulfilling, I'm successful and happy with the professional and academic challenges I'm overcoming every day, but I'm increasingly beginning to understand that this fulfillment isn't coming from my relationship. I often feel I would rather go for bike rides and work on art, than call with my boyfriend..

What should I do?

You are busy all day and when you come back from work you need an embrace , a touch , a feel a human touch.

LDR makes you Touch starved and you crave for it like a thirsty crow. You hug the pillow as hard you can as if its the person as you glance through her image on a video call that fades as you doze off. You see the body , you crave the touch , you feel yourself and then you crave for more. You reach out to their image, you bite your lips , you reach out to your lust but it remains elusive. The pleasure you see is on a screen thousands of miles away. Long distance makes you realize how much you can crave a person , how much you can want them.

You also realize how Intimacy is much more than just ejaculation, its a state of mind where your whole being comes in unison to release the emotions only another human could understand!

i broke up yesterday, how do i move on. i feel terrible and sad

i don’t know what to do anymore about this guy i’m in love with. we dated for a year when we were 15, i have never loved anyone like him and i don’t feel in my soul i could ever love anyone the way i love him. i’ve tried since we were 15 to be with other people and forget him but it’s impossible. he is an incredible guy and we connect so well, there are no issues-except that we currently live 5,000 miles apart. that’s not even the worst part, because i go visit him and he came to visit me in august. he wants to move to america and make a lot of money and be with me so that we can travel, then the plan is for me to move to his country with him permanently. we have talked about being together again and wanting to spend our lives together, but he said he can’t commit right now because of the distance and that he isn’t 100% sure about us yet. he said he has only ever been with me, so he can’t be sure that it’s true love if he hasn’t experienced other people (broke my heart to hear but i know he genuinely means the best). he is so kind and thoughtful and my dream man in every way. i’m planning to go visit him in january and we have talked about it, he’s so excited to see me.

the thing is i hardly hear from him. he has always been hard to reach. when he does text me, it’s very sweet, asking about me, the conversation is great. it just happens so rarely. i haven’t heard from him since september 25th. i know we aren’t in a relationship but it’s hard to do everything you could possibly do with someone and then go to not hearing from them for weeks at a time. i know he’s busy, also no he doesn’t have a girlfriend (i know his friends and life well). i just don’t know how to handle not hearing from the man i love so much. everything else in his attitude and actions shows he loves me but we hardly talk. at this rate how will i see him in january? plane tickets have to be bought.

i’m sorry about the rambling- i’m just 20 years old, busy, and i’d kill for some physical touch and affection. i see my friends in love and it feels like i’m in the backseat. i have no desire to date anyone else, but touch would be nice. how do i trust someone enough for that? where do i find someone? what if i hate how that goes if i do it?

people will say he doesn’t care about me and i would think that too. but you have no idea the way we are together and how incredible of a person he is. i see our whole lives and future all the time. i grasp at any crumbs he gives me and it’s just sad

how do i wait for him? i deserve to be happy and get communication, but how do i know what decision is right?

i’m only 20 but i feel like i’m wasting my life away. before i’m old i want a husband and kids and a life. i don’t want to live in limbo for him for 10 years.

tl;dr- how do you feel satisfied not hearing from the love of your life but rarely?

Hey everyone,

I’m posting because I’ve been struggling a lot with relationship anxiety lately, and I’m trying to figure out how to untangle my past from my current life.

To give some background, I was in a long-term relationship in the past where my ex cheated on me. I forgave her and stayed, but the trust was completely broken, and the last year of that relationship became awful—she became entirely avoidant, we went without physical intimacy for a long time, and the stress and anxiety from it were so bad I was literally having panic attacks at work. After that ended, I made the mistake of jumping into another relationship too quickly before finally getting into a healthy, genuinely great relationship a couple of months later.

My current partner is amazing. But I’ve realized that my nervous system is still wired for the worst-case scenario. Even though I have no logical reason not to trust her, my brain treats every little trigger like a warning sign because of what I went through before.

It manifests in really exhausting ways:

• The micro-triggers: When she takes longer than usual to text back, or her energy feels a little low, my brain immediately flashes back to old patterns. Even though I know she isn't my ex, my anxiety starts whispering that she's pulling away or losing interest.
• The distance amplifier: Being long-distance makes it so much harder. When I can't physically see her face or read her body language, that empty space gets filled with doubt, and everyday habits or slow communication trigger my insecurities.
• The emotional whiplash: We can have an amazing conversation or call, but the second we hang up, my overthinking kicks in, and I hate feeling like my emotional state is tied to how fast my phone buzzes.

It makes me feel so frustrated with myself because my current partner doesn't deserve to carry the baggage of what someone else did to me. I want to be fully present and secure for her, but my brain's defense mechanisms are stuck on high alert.

If you’ve ever dealt with relationship anxiety rooted in past cheating or trauma—especially while managing the hurdles of distance—how did you heal that part of yourself? What do you tell yourself when the old fears try to convince you history is repeating itself? Any advice or perspective would mean a lot.

Hi everyone,

I’m looking for some perspective from people who have been trailing spouses or moved abroad for a partner’s career.

My French partner and I have been together for 1 year and 7 months now. We are currently living in Australia, but we are planning to relocate to Martinique (French territory) later this year for his job.

To make this move happen, I am giving up my current job and momentum in Australia, leaving behind my financial independence, and moving to a foreign territory where I won't have immediate work rights. Our current plan is for me to enter on a 12-month Visitor Visa (VLS-TS Visiteur), register a PACS (civil partnership) once we arrive, and then apply for a status change (Vie Privée et Familiale) to get work authorization.

Here’s where my anxiety comes in: during the transition period (roughly 4 to 6 months after arriving), I will not be legally allowed to work. I will be completely dependent on him and our relationship holding strong in a brand-new environment.

I feel an overwhelming sense of asymmetrical risk. He gets a guaranteed job, immediate income, and a smooth career transition. I am the one taking on 100% of the vulnerability- quitting my job, giving up my work rights, and moving thousands of miles.

Because of this, I’ve felt increasingly anxious about relying on a PACS rather than marriage. From an immigration perspective, marriage is universally recognized, straightforward, and grants direct legal rights. But more than that, I feel like if I am making the ultimate life sacrifice for his career, I need the ultimate legal security and commitment in return.

He seems apprehensive about marriage, treating a PACS as the "standard" French stepping stone. To him, a PACS feels like a big step. But to me, a PACS leaves me feeling exposed while he stays completely comfortable.

• For anyone who moved abroad for a partner's job: Am I being unreasonable or asking for "too much" by wanting marriage before uprooting my life again?
• How did you handle the period where you couldn't work and were financially dependent?
• For those with French partners: How did you navigate the cultural divide between a PACS vs. Marriage when immigration risks were involved?

I’d love to hear your thoughts, experiences, or how you navigated this conversation without causing resentment. Thank you!

TL;DR: I (27F) am quitting my job and moving from Australia to a French territory for my French partner’s career. I’ll be taking on all the financial/career risk and won't have local work rights for 4–6 months. I feel anxious relying on a PACS (civil partnership) instead of marriage during this dependent period, but my partner thinks a PACS is "enough." Am I asking too much by wanting the legal security of marriage before uprooting my life again?

Content warning: Traumatic breakup, emotional loneliness, depression, and a difficult past relationship.

I'm 30F, and I feel like I'm trying to rebuild my life after losing so many years of it.

I spent my entire youth with a man who eventually left me in a deeply traumatic way. Our relationship wasn't healthy, but I was young and alone, and I didn't have the perspective or experience to fully understand what was happening.

I missed out on many life experiences: friendships, studying, exploring my sexuality, and different work opportunities.

When he left me, it was traumatic, and I found myself completely alone.

Since then, I've started working a physically and emotionally exhausting job. I barely have any free time or energy left for myself, and making friends has been difficult because I struggle socially and rarely have the opportunity to meet new people.

Then I met another man.

He has some avoidant traits, an intense interest in women, and certain quirks that make him difficult for me to understand. Despite all of that, I fell in love with him.

I've known him for almost a year now. At some point, I asked him to decide whether he genuinely wanted me in his life as a romantic partner or not.

He told me he wanted me, and since then, he's been more present in my life.

We live very far apart.

I've even suggested different possibilities, including an open relationship, a sexual relationship without commitment, or simply being friends. But he doesn't want those alternatives. He wants to keep the possibility of a relationship with me.

We're going to see each other a few more times, and I would eventually like to move closer to him. But I'm afraid I'll never really know whether he wants to build a future with me.

I'm very much in love with him, and I don't want to give up on something that feels meaningful to me.

At the same time, I'm incredibly lonely.

Lately, my depression has been becoming more present in my life again. I'm usually a positive person, but I feel as though I've had to leave my old self and my entire former life behind.

I feel like I'm starting from scratch, without a support system, without close friends, and without much time or energy to build a new life.

Sometimes everything looks bleak, and I find myself pushing my worries aside just to get through the day.

I've also wondered whether I should try to open myself up to other people, have sex, and experience things I missed out on when I was younger.

But the truth is that the people I meet don't interest me romantically or sexually. I don't want to force myself into experiences that don't feel right just because I'm lonely.

I want to live my life, but I also want to be with him.

I'm afraid of waiting for someone who might never be ready to build a life with me. After everything I've already been through, I'm terrified of losing more years of my life to uncertainty.

But I also don't want to give up on a relationship that could genuinely become something beautiful.

What would you do in my situation?

Would you continue exploring the relationship, giving it time to develop, while working on rebuilding your own life? How do you know when you're being patient with someone you love and when you're putting your life on hold for a future that may never happen?

I'd really appreciate thoughtful advice, especially from people who have experienced long-distance relationships or have had to rebuild their lives after a traumatic breakup.

Been with my bf a little over 2.5 years, about 19 months of it long distance (hes in Calgary, im in Portland). The plan was him moving here next fall when his contract ends. Last night he casually mentioned his company wants him leading a project in Edmonton that runs until at least 2028. He sounded excited tbh. Then it came out his mom knew, she called me today asking how i felt and i had to pretend id processed it.

I dont want to be the girlfriend who kills his career but him talking it through with her first and then dropping it on me like a weather update is what stings, we were supposed to decide stuff like this together and now i just feel informed. Am i overreacting about who he told first? idk.

I’m trying my best not to panic but it’s kinda to late. we didn’t fight or anything and it’s not like him but it’s almost been 24 hours since I last heard from him. how long was the longest you guys didn’t hear from your partner?

update: he replied 😭 he was sleeping. work tired him out.

I’m a guy in my twenties, and I’m in a long-distance relationship. Over the past few days, my girlfriend has seemed a little down and hasn’t really felt like talking. I’ve asked her a few times if something is bothering her, but she keeps saying everything is fine and leaves it at that.

I miss being able to enjoy our conversations—sharing how our day went, talking about things we’d like to do together, and just chatting about whatever comes to mind. I’ve been trying to be mindful of how she’s feeling, but I’m starting to feel emotionally drained too, and I’m finding myself less inclined to talk.

How can I gently explain how I’m feeling without hurting her feelings or making her feel pressured?

Because I sure wish I could with mine after this 😩

I’m secure attached now but I used to be anxiously attached, reassurance without asking is like a little treasure chest. Before this she told me she wished I could get on a plane tonight and she was wanting to get a dog to keep her company since she was lonely. We had a little conversation about it so I think we’re both feeling a little better. But 14 months is a long time to go before meeting the girl you’re dating, just 4 more to go…whew.

So how long has everyone been gone from a partner? How long did it take to meet the first time? If you want to share a story about your meeting, or even the second one, I love reading haha!

me and my gf met about 5 days ago and we only have 4 more days of her being here and i want to have sex before she leaves. i have another friend who was long distance and they had sex on the first night together. me and her are both virgins and we were each others first kiss so we don’t really know how things go. we have sexted a lot over text and did video calls before but that doesn’t translate well irl. we did talk about it before the trip and it’s something she wants too but idk how to initiate anything because kissing is still awkward.

i’m kinda just looking for general advice on how to make being intimate and even just kissing less awkward and how i can initiate or even if it’s too early and we should wait. any advice is very welcome

I've never posted in a subreddit like this and I may take this down, idk, but I've been thinking of posting for days here so I'm giving it a shot. I'm open to DMs too, I tried to keep some details vague to help protect identity. Sorry in advance, this is kind of rambly.

For context on distance, I live about a 7 hour drive away from my hometown. It's not crazy, I know a lot of long distance couples make it work over much larger distances. It's definitely a distance to plan for though and flying is in no way (both monetarily or convenience wise) more efficient.

So the story goes, last thanksgiving I was staying at my mom's house for thanksgiving and bored after she went to bed, so I jumped on Tinder. I've been on dating apps on and off where I live and not really gotten anywhere, the city I live in is just not a great city for younger singles to find love. I ended up matching with this guy and really hit it off when we met for drinks. Even the bartender remarked at how strong the chemistry was (I should note, this is a bar where he is at regularly enough to know the bartender - it didn't just seem like he was trying to fish for tips or anything).

Months went by, his car broke down, we texted pretty sparsely (neither of us, turns out, are much of texters). But in the summer, I went down for a family member's birthday and he took a whole day off work to see me. Just a couple weeks ago, I came down again after a death in the family, and he again took the day off work to see me. Now, I'm going to be back in town in November. He's recently gotten a new car, so there's talk of him coming up to see me or us meeting in the middle, but like over the span of 10 months here we've effectively gone on 3 dates.

On a side note, I am considering moving out of the city I do live in and have considered moving to a city that's only a couple hours away from my hometown, but I'm really at minimum about 6 months out from making that happen, if not longer. I don't know if I want to bank on this just yet as I'm also considering moving further away, but I have little to no interest in moving back to my hometown if I can help it and I eventually would like to leave this area of the country (SW USA).

I've met a handful of his friends, and he's met one of mine. His friends seem to like me, and my friend even remarked that they thought he was a really good fit for me off a first impression. Not that this stuff matters too much in the long run, but I just feel like it's a good sign.

I feel like when I'm in town in November there may need to be a conversation of where we see this going, but I'm really curious to know if anyone here may have some advice here or made something work in a similar situation, and what you may have done. I feel like if we lived in the same city, we may have already had this conversation months ago of where we see this going, but as of right now we're just at the early stages of dating over a very long time span. Again, I've just never really done this distance thing and want to do what I can to set it up for success.