My Mum died of cancer back in 2023 and my sister kept a tiny pouch of ash in case I ever wanted to use it for something. I think I do now. What's something nice I could use them for, I'm a 36 year old bloke. I know you can do all sorts now even get ashes tattooed.

What is up with checking ids at the till? Has anyone got asked for their id for any other reason then looking young? Couldn't buy a pack of paracetamol(!) today. The cashier said they ask everyone for an id but I 100% don't look under 25 (I'm 35+ and very much look my age).

Anyone in their 40s had the same? In their 50s?

UK Funeral advice. Has anyone used a service for printing order of service scrapbooks to remember lost loved ones?

We lost a family member and have an order of service from the funeral with speeches and poems and songs and it be nice to have it made into a professional leather bound quality scrap book / memory of the event for the young children... who might one day want to know what their dads funeral was like etc.

Maybe with art work and photos and appropriate typography etc. Something special

• If anyone has used such a service pls say.
  

Thank you.

Something I constantly wonder about is how so many women in their early 20s on social media afford to live in luxury flats in major cities like London and Manchester. They live alone, go shopping, eat out at nice restaurants and have beautifully furnished apartments, and I’m always curious about what they actually do for a living.

A lot of them have a decent following, but not necessarily 100k+ followers, so I wouldn’t expect them to be making huge amounts from influencing alone. Is it a particular career they’re in, are they making money through other streams, or is there something I’m missing? I highly doubt theyre doing stocks and trades on the side.

I earn a decent salary for the city I live in. I’m not living lavishly, but I can comfortably cover my expenses and put some money into savings each month. Even so, I can’t imagine affording that kind of lifestyle on my income, especially with the current cost of living crisis. I’m genuinely so curious about how they’re doing it because I see more and more of them on my feed!

Ive had a traumatising past month, with a bed bug infestation in the house ive been living in, so ive decided to move out and got a flat, however as a 19 year old boy I have no idea what to even do or start. I dont want it to look miserable like my current room looks. I already thought about adding fake plants, some art maybe, but as this is where I plan to stay forever (unless I become rich and buy a mansion)... so I want this place to be as good as I can. Im a proper gamer so I will have my setup in the front room, no TV (I have 3 monitors), I have to try and make my setup look clean, but my cable management is horrendous. Any help would be great! I dont know how the wealthy make their houses just feel rich, and im not wealthy by any means but i wants live somewhere that doesn't look depressing, and looks cute, cozy and comfy and modern and luxury premium.

As a woman in her mid twenties new to the country, what are the absolute dos and don'ts I should be aware of? It can be about travel, safety, lodging or ANYTHING else. Please give open advice so that I can make the most of my time and money and have a good sustainable experience. Thank you.

Evening all

I've a question for the artistic of you. I recently asked a family friend to lend us her talents and to paint a skeleton on a suit jacket and trowsers for my brothers upcoming wedding. (think James Bond in specter). All good and it looks amazing from the photis but she's being a bit skatty on how much she wants for her work. I want to offer fair (not mates rates) money for it and I don't want to be insultingly low. Does £100 sound about right?

TLDR: Need to leave tenancy by end of December. Don't have job. Need to focus on either job search or finding accommodation, can't do both because too sick. What to prioritise? Open to other suggestions I haven't considered.

Am having a massive panic and can't sleep. Will probably delete in morning.

Context

• Have long covid chronic fatigue and other physical conditions. Not sick enough for PIP / benefits. Am luckily well enough to be able to work 80% part time, in jobs not requiring manual labour.

• Have been severely depressed for past ~4y due to toxic work/PhD situation. Have just left said situation and am still recovering.

• Don't have job currently. Have £20k savings as buffer. Last paycheck came on 1st Oct - but this is a tax-free 'stipend' rather than normal salary (PhDs are weird).

• I have a joint tenancy with (now) ex partner. Landlord has no issues with us and we always paid rent on time.

• I do not have a family to return to or use as guarantors.

The dilema

• Just been told we need to end tenancy by end of Dec.

• Landlords won't rent to me because no job / income. Stipend and savings does not count as income unfortunately.

• Too much savings for universal credit.

• Part-time desk jobs (that I qualify for) are hard to come by.

• Not well enough to apply for jobs and housing simultaneously. If focussing on jobs first, I may not find one by December. If focussing on housing first, I won't pass affordability checks, and I will be fatigued by moving so will need recovering time before applying for jobs.

Things I have considered

• Lodging doesn't require affordability checks? But costs as much as renting a flat on my own, plus living with a stranger will be bad for my brain and therefore make job applications harder.

• Using my most recent payslip as 'evidence of income', even though I am no longer in that job and just pray they don't notice the stipend thing.

• Just refusing to move. This will make both of our lives infinitely harder.

• Have asked some friends if they could take me in, waiting for reply.

Don't know if any of this makes sense. I'm just terrified

My neighbours are perpetual home improvers. Their current project is a loft conversion.

My company is starting a project with an American client, which likely means some of my team will have to do night shifts. I'm panicking a little because the neighbours' construction starts at 8 am and the night shift would probably end around 4am.

I've looked online, and people recommended a white noise machine and earplugs. I did a test run this morning, and it just seems like the drilling and hammering cuts straight through. The majority of the work seems to be directly next to my bedroom. Hoping someone has any tips or advice

i would like to explain why i am asking this as this would be a no brainer if this was not the first time i have had to possibly think about doing a welfare check on my neighbour. i really hope this doesn’t sound stupid

i am a young woman who lives alone in a council flat, and have lived here for 4 years. i don’t know a lot of my neighbours, apart from a few who live above me and are friendly. however, 2 years ago the lady who lived next to me was put into a home and someone else had moved in. i didn’t think much of this woman, as i didn’t see her and just knew that she was never really home, and had 1 cat who used to come into my garden sometimes. summer last year i came back home from my mums house to the rspca outside her front door.

the officer asked me if i lived there, i said no but i’m the next door neighbour. she then proceeded to tell me that someone had reported that there was a sick/injured kitten in the garden. my heart sunk, as if i had known this before i would’ve been on the phone straight away. the way that i come off of my estate means that i never walk directly in front of her garden enough to see the garden properly, just to know that it was not very well kept. the officer and i walk round to the garden, where the people who had seen the kitten and made the report stood and had said the kitten had been there for days. to try to shorten this without leaving too much information out, the officer said that the kitten had fly strike and would have to put down. there was also multiple other kittens. the rspca left a note on her front door, which she had not taken off which meant she was not home. i fed the kittens that were still there as much as i could through the back fence for a couple of days, then ended up contacting housing to see if there was anything else, but then eventually contacting the police for a welfare check as there was a possibility something could have happened and also concern for the other cats as there was not much the rspca could do at this point. it turned out that she was ‘fine’, that she goes to take care of her elderly mum, but does struggle with her mental health. the rspca did take appropriate action once they were able to make contact with her. since then, i have not seen her once, i occasionally hear strange noises from her flat.

so here is my actual predicament:

a couple of days ago, i walk past her flat and see the kitchen light is on and that there is a sofa thats been dismantled standing upright in the hallway. the way that the sofa is positioned means that there is absolutely no space for you to get in and out of the flat, only between rooms. the space between the reason why i looked is because you have to walk directly past other people’s kitchen to get to your flat, the flats here have the same layouts. she also does not have blinds. i don’t think anything of it as maybe she was moving things around - who knows. i haven’t really been out up until today, where i come back around an hour ago, so the light being on is very noticeable and the sofa is still in the same position as it was when i first saw this. as much as i hold sadness towards this woman neglecting the kittens, i do not wish her any ill and i am genuinely concerned, i’m just worried that she will know it’s me, be annoyed that there’s another welfare check and simply the fact that maybe i’m being a nosy neighbour?

Went into my local b&m store today and noticed they have started playing normal songs rather than the royalty free stuff they've been playing for years. Was a nice change to sing along to some bangers like 'Mr brightside' whilst wandering the aisles. Has anyone noticed this in other UK stores? Mine is near Bristol.

i’m looking into shower head filters because i’m really into haircare and someone suggested a shower head filter to cancel out that maybe being an issue

but i’m wondering if in the UK it’s necessary? i googled the water in my area (cheltenham) and it says it’s hard water…

results were kinda confusing it says online they don’t soften water so is it a scam or even effective enough idk ?! i rent also so would need to be renter friendly

ty

Every year it’s the same, round this time of year the humidity in my room sky rockets, floor becomes wet to the touch, condensation, mold, and even rust, sweating even though it’s cold.

We’re talking 90-100% humidity, it’s so bad it actually broke my brothers vintage speakers

It’s a constant battle of putting the portable AC on and hoping it runs long enough to pull the water out of the air before it shuts off on being too cold

Even then I’ve only really achieved 77% on a good day with the air con

Would a dehumidifier be able to keep it down? To around 50-70% and are they safe to run 24/7?

My mum was called today by postcode lottery that she has won and they will be sending film crew to local village hall on Monday to reveal how much she’s won.

Fully verified and also with next door neighbour who also got the same call.

Do you know how much she’s likely to win if sending full film crew?

AskUK,

I have to get something off my chest that’s been bothering me occasionally for nearly a year now. 

Last Christmas, my wife and I were visiting the UK from America, and were largely amazed by how pleasant the train journeys were. 

However, I had one really bizarre experience that stuck with me for how unexpected it was, and I want your take. 

Here’s the situation - we’re on a train from London to Pewsey. We have reserved seats, but at London the cut off a couple of rail cars, and so many people who had reserved seats now do not - the conductor announces that it’s a free for all. Vibes are bad. My wife and I initially have seats (not our own, as someone else has taken those), but I give mine up to an elderly person, and so we get slightly separated. 

As we progress across the countryside, the train fills. And fills. And fills. Frankly, it felt dangerous? People fill the aisles to the point where no one can move, and I watch each station stop become a clusterfuck of people rushing to get off, while the platform people surge forward. 

Okay so, because we got on at the beginning,  and have large bags for our multi-week trip, we stash the big bags in the dedicated little luggage room at the end of the carriage, and then went to sit down… but as the train fills, I get this deep sense of anxiety about how the heck I’m going to get down the aisle to the bags, extract the bags, and exit the train at the station before I get swamped by the onrush of people. I have a vision of being unable to get off the train in time and stuck on Xmas eve miles away from the destination, unable to get back. 

I’m unfamiliar with the train line, have no cell service, and so pretty much immediately after the stop that I know to be the stop prior to ours, I signal to my wife and begin making my way down the aisle towards the luggage room. This is not fun - it’s a squeeze, but there’s no alternative. I cannot quantum tunnel through people, and yet everyone seems oddly resentful, sullen and unhelpful, despite presumably all facing a similar issue? Idk, it’s odd. Finally, I make it to the accordion connection point between the two carriages, where the luggage room is. Our two bags (check-in size, 20kgs each) are now piled underneath a vast stash of other bags, push chairs, wheelchairs, etc. I begin to sweat. The train is moving vigorously. I gingerly begin to try to get at my wife’s bag and my bag, knowing that if I’m still standing in this hallway pulling bags out when we arrive at the station, I’m going to be holding up many angry people. 

Here’s where it got weird - I pull out bag number 1, and squeeze it next to me, steadying it with one hand, while I try and get bag number 2. This inevitably involves a little bit of bag juggling, and there isn’t much space, but I’m not squeezing anyone more than they are already squeezed. Anyway - this one guy, with a very aggressive tone, says “what are you trying to do”? Like, as if he’s trying to start a fight. What throws me is that he looks relatively normal. Like, I’m not culturally attuned to the types of people who might want to fight on public transit in the UK, but I’m just totally not expecting this. So I completely ignore it. I come from a city where public transit is populated entirely by people who will murder you not out of maliciousness, but just because they’re having a schizophrenic break, so I’m good at cultivating a sense of “this isn’t happening”.

Anyway. It kind of keeps happening - he tries to make eye contact, and keeps making comments like “what are you doing” (which - isn’t it obvious?!)  but no one else says anything. They all just stare at their feet. Not the kind of supportive glance I’m hoping for. By this point, I have both bags by my feet / between my legs, and there’s only an awkward 3 or 4 minutes before the train pulls into Pewsey and, exactly as hoped, I’m able to step off the train with the massive bags without getting in anyone’s way. I have no chance to look back and see if that made it clear to him what the goal was. 

Once on the station, I realize how weirdly tense and stressed I was - I’m soaked with sweat. 

Anyway - I’m curious if from the British perspective I broke some kind of deep train etiquette, or if your aggressive psychos just look better dressed than ours. 

I’m thinking the FlixBus, National Express, Megabus routes etc all in one place. I mean a proper map, not a route planner like Rome2Rio/Omio etc.

Thanks!

Is it shorter/longer if the food falls in different rooms? At someone else's place? If someone else is the one who drops it? (Where have their fingers been?) What speedy calculations are going on for you in those danger moments?

I live in a ground floor flat. We’ve had new people move in above. They are pretty inconsiderate of others. They filled the communal bike storage shed with camping stuff and all the bits they don’t want to store in their house. And when asked about it said they didn’t have enough storage in their flat. Yeah, same as everyone else who lives here 🤬

They’ve got 2 cats. They either wedge the communal door open, all our parcels are stored in that foyer so anyone could walk in. Or the cats sit at my windowsill and meow all evening.
I’ve let the cats in a couple of times so they can go to their own door and meow. But I’ve noticed they put them back out so it starts again a few minutes later.

I haven’t spoken to them yet but am fairly sure I’ll get a flippant response that they have no way of getting their cats without wedging the door, and that they can’t stop them sitting on a windowsill. It frustrates me as I purposefully haven’t got pets, I want a dog, because I live in a flat and if it barks etc it’s much worse for everyone else as well.

I know it’s not the cat’s fault but any humane ways to deal with this and keep them off the windowsill.
I did think loud booming music all evening until late as the cats won’t come near and it’ll annoy the owners in the flat above. But I’m not that much of an a**hole.

Currently live in North England, good work prospects - enjoy the job most of the time , comfortable , future prospects.

Just feeling a bit like I’ve outgrown things here.

House sale going through , was thinking about renting in Leeds but for almost similar price I could rent in London.

Bored of not having anything to do on the weekends up north. Feel like I’ve tired everything.

Not found long term partner yet.

Most of my friends are either married with children or they’ve moved overseas.

Some friends and some family in London.

Job prospects in London seem good but I’d be giving up a reputation and good prospects at my current firm.

Feels like a tough decision but I think I should see if I find the right job opportunity?

Seems to be more that will pay a bigger salary in London too albeit the London weighting.

Should I just give it a go?

I suppose I’m worried about regretting and not continuing with current role and current job relationships and where they could lead to. Or going and not fitting in anywhere and hating it …

While travelling on on the M6 a fairly dirty 4 year old white Peugeot Partner van turned on undercover police style flashing LEDs and a siren to move people out the fast lane and proceed about 90mph.

Would this have been a genuine emergency vehicle? The registration number shows both taxed and MOTd, which wouldn't be normal if it was a police vehicle?

My original plan was to save for a down payment on my childhood home but once reality hit, I realised I’d never be able to afford bills, maintenance or pay off the mortgage within my lifetime. Now I don’t have a clue what to save for.

What are you guys doing with yours? Education would be my second choice but the uk job market is so broken, I know countless people who got degrees to only end up still struggling in minimum wage jobs.

Started a new job 1 month ago. Was fired from my old job for not getting on with my new manager. I loved that job, but I think because I really liked my CFO. The work itself was similar to my new job. I really enjoy the work at my new job.

The problem I’m finding is that I’m not clicking with my new boss. He’s a lovely man, but I don’t have that same chemistry I’ve had with previous bosses. It’s made me realise I’m looking for a mentor.

I’m not happy. And motivation is low.

I’m on good money, with a good salary, but it’s not what makes me happy. It’s the connection I crave.

I have £350k in the bank. 32F. No children.

Why have this money if I’m miserable?

£80k salary currently.

What would you do if you were me?

In my late 40s now. We lived in a seaside town when we were teenagers and spent a lot of time at the beach in the sand dunes. One time near fireworks night, about seven or eight of us got our hands on some fireworks. We had a bonfire and tried roasting jacket potatoes in tin foil, though that never quite worked the way you thought it would. And of course firing rockets into the bonfire… one bounced off a rock and hit my brother. He was ok. Still yaps on about it though.

Anyway, on the way back home across the beach, for some reason, somebody decided to open up a firework on the seawall. Then I came up with the bright idea of seeing what would happen if we put a lighter next to the powder inside.

As soon as I did that, all I remember is a massive flash of light, something spinning around fast, and then an almighty boom. I remember so vividly looking up and seeing the bodies of my friends all laid out sporadically on the beach, quite a distance from each other.

Miraculously nobody was injured that I can remember, but I do remember appreciating that in movies when there's a big explosion, you're always wondering why people end up on the floor. Well, that's why: you just naturally get knocked on your ass.

So yeah, a dumbass thing to do, but at the same time hilarious, only because nobody was injured by some kind of miracle. Great days.

Paid £70 and worn twice. 70% Cotton 30% Polyester. I've always done mixed washes at 40° with no problems to my whites but not this time. It has had two extra runs alone own with Vanish Oxi Action and while there is an ever so slight improvement, it's still quite visible.

Thanks for any suggestions!

So preppers seem to be having something of a renaissance right now. I'm not judging and actually the idea of being somewhat self sufficient in an emergency appeals. But practically most people can only be so self-reliant for so long, especially in the face of the kind of scenarios that would require it. Like beyond a certain point its logically madness to think you're going to have everything you need long-term and in some kind of societal breakdown wouldn't you be better off learning how to improvise and think on your feet rather than hoarding supplies?