This is a strange topic, I feel like any time I havea topic I want to discuss and just want to be in a safe space, I come here and want to be around my fellow NBs.

Honesty, I am autistic first of all, please don't misread my directness in asking questions or saying observations to mean I think I'm right/correct about everything. I am just going off my own personal observations and then more asking questions from that experience.

So, I noticed recently when I ask advice (both in real life and online), I get self help answers even though the questions I asked were really more (as an autistic person) trying to understand other people. For example, I am in a situationship that I want to become a relationship currently. I asked several of my friends for advice about this. And anyone younger than 30 (yes, I have friends with a wide range of ages. I'm LGBT. The community is big where I live, but there are still limitations lol) gave me advice that basically was just...self help. But that wasn't what I was asking. I should be more specific I guess.

So, I live in the Philippines. However, I am American. I lived in Korea for 15 years (which was my entire adulthood post University). Add this on top of being autistic, and ....yeah, I find figuring out new cultural norms hard. And Filipinos (in my experience) do not love teaching foreigners about their culture by the way. I don't know why exactly (as Koreans love teaching foreigners about their culture lol). The point would be : It can be hard to figure things out sometimes. Add on top of this that this is my first real experience being fully accepted into a LGBT community (I was openly nonbinary in Korea, but a lot of folks their were still fairly transphobic/nbphobic, especially as I present male still, and they considered me "not a real trans person" basically).

Background finished - When I asked advice, it was basically to understand nuances in Filipino culture or specifically Filipino LGBT culture, so I could read the signs better/undrestand my partner better, basically. I was looking to figure her out, because she is even indirect for an already indirect culture (she has a very hard shell, she is tough as nails which I love. But I want to know her better, and getting her to peak out of her shell is difficult).

However, these under 30 folks are giving me advice that is basically self help, not really at all about how to understand her. They kept saying, "I'm not her, so I can't know!" Yeah, but ....you are also LGBT and Filipino....you have insights I don't have, which is what I'm asking for. Also, if the idea is you can't give advice if you are not the person...why would they so freely give me self help advice (which notably was horrible, like...terrible for someone like me. They were giving me advice that was obviously for themselves, but was not good advice for someone like me at all and would make me miserable if I'd followed it. Notably, I have had several therapists in my life, I'm well aware of actual self help advice I need, lol).

So, this has been long winded. Did I say I also have ADHD? Sorry folks. Anyways, what I want to know is - Gen Z folks here - Do y'all just assume self help rather than assuming that people would want help understanding others? I don't really get it. I feel very confused by this kind of advice that I'm not looking for while not giving the advice I am loooking for. I think I am a fairly direct person, so I think it was fairly obvious I was asking for advice understanding her, not doing things for myself.

P.s. Also, I do have older friends - They all actually gave advice that I was looking for (which was incredibly helpful, lol). Which notably, is making me wonder if the way Millennials and Gen Z communicate is some way different in some odd way I'm not getting.

Showing off my whole costume :3 (still a dork)

Hii I’m in dfw and going to an indie concert tomorrow wondering if anyone wants to join :3 im 26 and open to chat in messages !

Going as a gothic French maid :3 I think it turned out ok! Haha

Hi, I'm MTF and have been for over two years now but I've started to question things. Here's why:

-I've realised I hate binaries, or boxes. I feel like I transitioned just to be end up being restricted in a different way
-While I definitely lead towards femme, I feel andro if that makes sense
-I thought my chosen name would grow on me but over 2 years in and I still don't think it feels right
-I don't see how just man or woman can encapsulate anybody and I just don't know anymore if I feel comfortable with the word "Woman". I just want to be a person, with my own thoughts, feelings, preferences
-I hate how everything is so gendered and you're looked at like you're breaking some moral law if you seem genderqueer
-I feel my most comfortable when I'm around non binary people or when I feel androgynous

It still hurts me though when someone thinks I'm a guy. I don't think I fully feel like a binary woman, but I absolutely detest the idea of being a man. I'm not too sure how to proceed

For context my name is Adaline but I'm considering changing it to my middle name Jenny - while still femme it feels more like me than Adaline does.

I still want breasts, a feminine figure and so on but I just don't think "Woman" is quite the right fit for me. Any advice would be welcome.

PS: Currently on HRT

I wanna hear your costumes, I need ideas, might dress up at work

Starting to like my appearances more just want to learn how to mix these looks more.

I GOT THIS DRESS TODAY AND AHHHHHHHHH I LOVE ITTTT 😭😭

I know- technically- this might not be non-binary stuff but I figured it would be the safest place to ask this question.

Is there any possible micro label I might connect with if- my gender is in scrambles?

I’ve thought about it heaps, I’m already 100% certain I’m aroace but my gender remains a mystery?

I know I am biologically female, don’t really care about that until I have to care like for my safety and periods. And I used to think Cassgender fit me but it’s like a puzzle piece that looks right but isn’t lol

So- I feel discomfort stating that I go by she/her irl, however when I’m online I typically go by he/him or they/them, primarily masculine pronouns but I know I’m not trans.

Labelling my gender makes me feel prickly when it’s brought to attention by job stuff or other people, but I couldn’t care less irl and I’m wondering why I might be feeling that way.

Sometimes I’d prefer if I had absolutely no pronouns, like when I’m alone I’m not focusing on my gender, just my existence and soul and it’s tiring having to conform to it when I just want to be an entity existing but to have utterly no pronouns which I’d prefer, is basically impossible because there’s so many different forms of pronouns and people need to call me SOMETHING and it’s frustrating.

I have a connection with my biological gender but that’s just cause I grew up in a way that thought nothing else until I was 17 and now I’m older and it’s still a mystery to even myself.

My biological gender to me just feels like I’m carrying around my younger self as a way to still connect to other people because it’s the only way I know how but I know there’s a disconnect to her and to me.

So I was wondering if any of you might potentially have an idea, sorry for the rant 🥲

I’m a teacher and out to my colleagues but not to my students (it’s easier that way, trust me) but wanted something subtle to signal to those who know that they’re not alone. Happy with how it looks!

Hi, these photos are from 2023. Haven't played dress-up in a while. :D Also ever since I was a kid, I would wear my mom's boots, play with dolls and by the age of 12, I knew I wanted to be a eunuch. At 16 or 18 I started self-harming my area. Haven't got rid of them yet, unfortunately. My genitals cause me severe distress. Anybody else have this problem?

For context, I'm AFAB

(assigned female at birth) for about five years now, I've identified as a trans guy, went by a male name, pronouns and everything, until during the past few months I've started to not feel fully male, for about three or four, maybe five months now? I've started to identify as transmasculine, but that didn't even feel right, I did more research and found out that I'm really, nonbinary!

I’m a 24 year old Australian AMAB, I’ve been dealing with dysmorphia on and off since I was 12 years old, but only this year discovered the possibility of being Non Binary, it feels so right, but incredibly depressing and scary for me.

I came out as trans to my mother and sister when I was 13 or so, but the support at the time was weird, very avoided, almost like mourning? and eventually after a few months kind of gave up on it and carried on as cis. I spent my teenage years tossing and turning over my sexuality instead. Fast forward to COVID, I began once again questioning my gender, in my mind it was either all in or not (in my case a very autistic way of thinking lol) thus continuing the constant loop of “I think I’m transgender, wait no I’m not I’m certain I’m not”.

My current partner, my amazing beautiful partner, is Non Binary, and through them I’ve realised that I really kind of connect with that or maybe Agender, and now it’s become real to me and not an alternate reality, now I’m scared. In finding something that I connect with, I’ve never felt more lonely, my family is supportive of the LGBT community but like most older Australians quite opinionated, same with my close friends, even my partners family. I’m perceived as not man enough or woman enough in every group setting I attempt to be apart of.

In finding myself depression has hit me like a truck, I’m scared of both reverting back to giving up and conforming to what is expected of me and embracing it at a cost, because of trauma I’m conditioned to put other’s happiness above my own, and I simply can’t trust myself.

I am struggling to understand whether I am gender queer, nonbinary, something else, etc. any suggestions or ideas?

I'm so lucky, my mom took it really well. She doesn't care at all. She understood that I am who I am, no matter what. I cried. And I'd been crying for a week because of the dysphoria. I was actually planning to wait more. But I'm so lucky to have such an understanding mother. I still have to tell my sister. But I feel so relieved. Something good came out of a bad week. I never thought I'd have the chance to live being who I am. Oh, I want to cry again.

I wish I could pop my beard off and on as and when needed. My ideal form is a shapeshifter

Getting it bleached later today! I was just curious, what colour do you think would suit my skin tone best?

I've been thinking about stopping T for over a year on and off now (genderfluid between male and non-binary) and would like to chat with someone who might have experience with that. Or just someone who can help me a bit with untangling my thoughts and feelings.

I recently figured out I'm bigender. I'm currently masc but want to get in that in-between. Should I try to get thick thighs, muscular arms, or both. I already know I want fat transfers to get breasts and a bigger ass along with wanting to take estrogen.

I love makeup, I miss it, I want to wear it again. I have a drawer full of it. But I’m trying to be more masc and I fear the makeup ruins any progress my 1.5 years on testosterone has made.

I dont regret wearing makeup to this concert, I love how I looked and I matched my partner. I just hate how it ruins any possibility of me being read masc 😭

(This is genuinely just a rant, not asking for advice. I’m on T. I’m a powerlifter. I don’t need to know that glitter makes me look more femme I’m aware 😌)

What is up my friends. I am in dire need of assistance, couple of problems. I am attending a wedding in a month (we love procrastination) and I want to find something close to this (inspo pics attached) to wear. My biggest problem is I am afab and cursed with double Ds. I’m normally just rocking a compression sports bra and I rarely have a reason to wear formal attire. The dress code is semi-formal. Any advice on binding to best suit the fit and also ideas on where to source the clothes is welcome 🫶 thanks so much! Hopefully this is allowed:)