r/NonBinary • • 6d ago

ModPost New rule: categorically nonbinary is trans

2.6k Upvotes

“We no longer allow discussions, debates, arguments etc over whether nonbinary is trans. It is. This does not mean any specific nonbinary person is obligated to identify as trans. Please respect this rule and refrain from any arguments about it.” — is the text of the rule.

This now nonnegotiable in this subreddit. This is a fact that has been known about nonbinaryness since it was coined. Nonbinary was never not categorically trans. Please respect this rule—if you have issues being referred to as trans, you are completely free as an individual person not to use that word! A subreddit can’t make you call yourself trans if you don’t want to.

But please respect that we have to now make this rule explicitly clear because lately multiple discussions have caused back and forth arguments because, despite being told you can opt out of personal trans identity, a handful of people (usually with no or very little other usage of this subreddit) have come in here to argue about it.

I want to leave comments here open but also I don’t know what other words I can say to indicate this isn’t up for debate. The rule is set. It’s not going to change. Trying to argue it is a waste of your time and the mod team’s.

Not every subreddit will be a perfect fit! If you can’t respect this rule please use another subreddit. Or even start one. I know people act like I’m being a jerk when I suggest that but I don’t know why. If someone wants to make a subreddit without this rule, you could even advertise it here in the comments. This rule is specifically about the culture of this subreddit and is not trying to control the entirety of nonbinary identity.


r/NonBinary • • 25d ago

ModPost A pause on allowing research/study posts.

161 Upvotes

Unfortunately we have to pause approving research/call for participants/studies posts. They are by far the majority of modmail we receive and to appropriately vet the research/researchers is simply beyond what this volunteer mod team can handle right now. We are hoping to build the mod team at some point and may allow them again.

This has been exacerbated by people ignoring our rule that the study must be specifically about nonbinary people. Some researchers have been rather pushy about it and I’m not going to lie and say that hasn’t influenced this decision as well.


r/NonBinary • • 3h ago

I Thought It Was Broken Hair…

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583 Upvotes

I’d been kinda bugged that I had some hair at my hairline where it broke off. WTF is my grey hair breaking off like this? 😡

Then I realized, WAIT A MINUTE!! I’ve been on E for four months and hair grows at 1/2” per month and these are all two inches long. That’s not broken off hair, that’s new hair growing back in!!

I looked closer, and it all mixed in on my scalp! Fuck yeah!!


r/NonBinary • • 5h ago

Support i wanna be feminine in a femboy way not in a cis girl way

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427 Upvotes

I wanna be androgynous like a boy who looks like a girl not a girl who looks like a boy, yk??

any tips on how I can be like that??

I already wear a binder but I don't feel like it's working, I think maybe if I lose weight it will get better? or maybe if my hair was straight and I could make a more androgynous hairstyle? idk I need help

sorry for my bad english, I'm Brazilian.


r/NonBinary • • 2h ago

Laughs in electrician⚡

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134 Upvotes

r/NonBinary • • 7h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Tights: $1.50 Feeling like: a million bucks

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168 Upvotes

r/NonBinary • • 2h ago

Baby, come back to me

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30 Upvotes

r/NonBinary • • 1h ago

Rant First experience of transphobia in public

• Upvotes

I'm just posting this to kinda vent about something that happened to me this morning.

I was taking public transportation on my way to work this morning. I sat in front of a family, one adult and two children, and they were just kinda talking about me like I wasn't there.

They kept talking among themselves, pondering whether I'm a boy or girl. They eventually started calling me a transsexual. I genuinely don't know if they meant anything with malice or not. Regardless of intent, it made me incredibly uncomfortable, I would consider my first fully negative experience with being othered in public about my identity.

I present somewhat androgynously with a few feminine characteristics. What makes it all the more sad to me is that I am about 5 weeks post-op from top surgery. I've been feeling nothing but happiness and comfort until this morning.

I am happy in my own body and my presentation, especially in the privacy of my home or with my friends, but I don't like being perceived in public like an oddity or spectacle. I'm just living life like everyone else. Now, I'm a little self-conscious about how the world is looking at me.

I'm doing my best to brush this off as I know this is such a small thing, but for some reason, it's sticking with me.


r/NonBinary • • 6h ago

Sometimes I like to look like a boy… or at least try my best lol

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58 Upvotes

A little eyeliner, pink nails, messy hair… this is me having a boy day. Being genderfluid, I’m learning to feel at home in these moments too. Just enjoying being me, wherever I land today!!!❤️❤️❤️😘


r/NonBinary • • 22h ago

Pride/Swag/I Made This! A glitched trans patch I made for myself today. ⚧️🏳️‍⚧️👾

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975 Upvotes

The fabric is scrap fabric i had in my collection, I made the design with acrylic craft paint, sealed it with ModPodge fabric, and heat-treated it with my iron.


r/NonBinary • • 9h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Thank you for all the support( update on the last post)

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71 Upvotes

I wanted to come back with a response for all the support and feedback I received in the last post I made.

Generally this community helped me come to terms with the fact that trying is alright and what I am feeling is a valid need and it is quite normal. I still have a lot to try but all of you gave me the support I needed and for that I extend a warm thank you to all of you who commented on the post .

Literally on the first day of the post I put an order for lipstick and I was generally anxious with how it would turn out but this being the first time I wore lipstick I got charmed by it. I felt surprisingly beautiful wearing it and I wanted to share it with all of you.

If the wig looks funny it is because it is from a cosplay that I wanna do of Alucard from Hellsing and I have not got the time right now to style it but I still like how it looks ( although I love more how I look without it)

TLDR: thank you to the community for all the support I received on my last post 🎉🎉 It genuinely gave me the guts to do the photos.


r/NonBinary • • 2h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Finally regained the confidence to take photos and they came out so good

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19 Upvotes

This collage got me double my normal story views on Instagram all from people I used to know 😭

Clearly someone is going around sharing this stuff but that obviously means I'm in their head 🤭🤭


r/NonBinary • • 20h ago

Wore a skirt to my office for the first time today :3

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484 Upvotes

Also got some new makeup today! I am getting better and better at it. I wish my knees looked better though 😭 dysmorphia/dysphoria go brr


r/NonBinary • • 9h ago

Support Nonbinary and Transfeminine

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53 Upvotes

The nuances of gender identity, expression, and overall feelings are so crazy and honestly, I love how they vary from person to person. I am someone who would consider themselves both Transgender & Nonbinary.

I've landed on the fact that my particular experience is that of a "Nonbinary Transfem." I plan transitioning at some point in a feminine way, most likely via HRT, but currently working on things socially as well. I feel this is what works for me!! Not everybody is the same and I'm happy to be both Transgender and Nonbinary. My gender, even though I am more geared towards femininity, cannot be encapsulated by the the "binary" of male or female. I don't identity as either, and at this point and time, I don't plan on doing so.

Also, am I the only one here who doesn't like the Nonbinary flag? I usually just use the Trans flag in my own experience, given that people who are Enby are also represented on it as well. I like the idea of the Enby flag... But yeah.. The colors just are a bit much together IMO. But, that's just me. The Genderfluid flag is much nicer IMO.

Also... I'm curious to how many other Nonbinary Transfems there are here? Do you use this labeling at all, or do you just call yourselves Nonbinary?


r/NonBinary • • 1h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Papa, you don’t have to like pink to be a girl

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• Upvotes

I started to like pink… and then I got this sweater (jacket?)… I told my daughter I like pink these days… and she hated pink to be the a girl color… and she said, “papa, you are beautiful in any color. And you don’t have to wear pink to be pretty!”


r/NonBinary • • 4h ago

Ask What are *your* best strategies to deal with imposter syndrome and lack of validation?

18 Upvotes

Howdy folks,

I'm a masculine non-binary person. I navigate the world being percieved as a cis man by anyone who doesn't lead with the assumption that appearance does not equal identity.

I don't often feel like I "don't belong" but that's because I tend to relentlessly self advocate and take up space within queer & gender expansive circles because I want to live the values of inclusion that I personally hold.

But that gets to be really exhausting for me. I often find myself feeling deeply hurt by this sense that I will never fit in anywhere. Nor will I find myself welcomed in an authentic way. I will forever need to fight for a spot. That I am guilty of infiltration and subject to purity testing. That I have to absorb microaggressions and investigations because to push back would be taken as evidence that those misconceptions about me are true.

I am not alone or isolated. I have friends who value me and care for me. I am luckier than many other folks in my circumstance to have at least something to come back to. But it rarely feels like enough and I still fear exhausting the emotional labor of the people around me.

My question would be: How do you deal with these situations and these feelings? What changes have you made that has made it easier to deal with situations like these? No wrong answers, or just feel free to share your story.


r/NonBinary • • 2h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Went out with friends

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6 Upvotes

r/NonBinary • • 19m ago

Rant As an enby who leans fem and is attracted to men I feel pressured to call myself straight

• Upvotes

I’ve called my self a trans woman for a while but recently I’ve realized I feel more of both masculine and feminine or somewhere in between. I feel like there is pressure to call myself straight because I take estrogen and present femme most of the time. I don’t feel like it describes my internal and external experience in both my past and present. I don’t even want to consider myself a straight trans fem. I never have. It’s just frustrating how many people in even the LGBT community seem to think they understand other’s, especially enbies, social and internal experience enough to decide what they are for them


r/NonBinary • • 1d ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Pumpkin patch

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413 Upvotes

My best buds partner took photos of me and my family and I feel super emotional about how affirming it is to actually be able to see myself for the first time. I still struggle from time to time with dysphoria, and I'm definitely still wildly insecure. But I really love the way I look in these pictures.


r/NonBinary • • 13h ago

Pride/Swag/I Made This! a profile pic of my fursona

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30 Upvotes

This is Warp, the space chameleon! They are my fursona, and they're canonically nonbinary!

This specific image of them is used as my Tumblr profile pic!


r/NonBinary • • 3h ago

Support I don’t see myself or a road ahead in the mirror anymore

3 Upvotes

You might make assumptions based on that title that are stronger than I intended, there is no risk of self harm here.

But recently I started going to therapy presenting femme (I’m 49 and have a penis). This is a bit of a hardship
I am working before and after this appointment and cannot be out at this job.

But it’s … changed things. And I feel the weight of expectations on me in a way that I haven’t before, as the next milestone to cover here is HRT.

Outside of work, and distant family, I’ve been socially transitioned since Feb/Mar. every step of doing that has felt amazing, validating, like discovering me. And presenting femme at therapy has felt amazing too - indeed I had my first set of sexual ideations that included bottom surgery shortly after. But suddenly… it’s like I’ve hit a wall?

Now all I have is … a series of hard things to do? That might ruin my 23 year old marriage (so far she has been wonderful but absolutely balked at the idea of me not having facial hair)? And ruin my job as carrer? And fuck up my kids?

Finding femme looks for fall/winter has been very very hard for me. This is probably related.

But I feel like that scene in Dune when the Reverend Mother discovers she cannot see the future anymore. Blind panic is the only emotion I recognize. And resentment. I’m resenting having done any of this over 2026 right now. I …liked the problems I used to have a lot more than I like this problem.

Anyway. Wondering if anyone finds this relatable? Or has advice?


r/NonBinary • • 1d ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar Vampy vibes ✨

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184 Upvotes

r/NonBinary • • 2h ago

Ask How do i make people ask my pronouns?

3 Upvotes

I recently realised i'm more comfortable in myself being called they/them,

it made a lot of things make sence that didn't before but how do i make people ask my pronouns or make myself appear more gender queer to then make them not assume im cis gender?

I don't look androgynous and am not striving to be but i know not looking androgynous can make my identity seem less believable and make people less likely to ask.

My parents wouldn't support and i feel too nervous to outwardly have a pronoun pin. I do have a non binary kandi cuff and a non binary coloured single on my bag though but it's not a very big thing. I might make a pronoun bracelet at some pointbut i'm not gonna wear it at my occupation daily because not everyone understands.

Any tips?


r/NonBinary • • 15h ago

Rant Annoyed with reddit

32 Upvotes

Is my feed just messed up or has reddit gotten worse the past few months? So it started with me out of nowhere getting these two subs hatethissmug and ihatethissmug on my feed right. I muted them recently because their negative energy was getting to me. Anyways so during the short time i did browse those subs i saw a LOT I MEAN A LOT of bigotry and worst of all ingroup bigotry. Then later i started to see this kinda stuff everywhere on reddit. People who normalize 4tran type bullshit normalizing and excusing slurs like theyfab and enbyphobic truscum shit and transmed stuff. And the worst part. IT WAS UPVOTED AND TREATED LIKE IT WAS COMMON SENSE. All this shit has started to get to me, i really need someone to tell me this ain't what the majority of the lgbtq community is like. i WANT someone anyone to tell me its just my feed and those kinds of people are just a tiny minority being very vocal.

If this post doesnt fit the community please tell me


r/NonBinary • • 20h ago

Selfie/Self-Image/Avatar First selfie :)

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51 Upvotes