As a Fi user, I find that myself and other Fi users in my life tend to be very comfortable telling people who are close to us where they stand in our lives ("You are like a brother to me.", "You are my workplace Day 1 OG bestie.", "You are one of my closest friends."), whereas Fe users tend to not reveal where you sit in their hiearchy of relationships.

For example, I notice a general pattern where after I disclose to an Fe user where they sit in my relational hiearchy, they tend to either respond positively or remain neutral without reaffirming my place in their relational hiearchy. In a sense, the topic is left hanging without closure.

Whereas when I disclose to an Fi user about where they sit in my relational hiearchy, they tend to either reaffirm mutual closeness or even outright correct me, in their own ways, that I have misjudged the relationship.

Also, I notice that Fi users tend to be more explicit about where each person fits in their relational hiearchy. They can be nice to you, but you can tell - especially in a group setting - who they feel close to and whether they are interested in a conversation or playing nice. It's like we wear our hearts on our sleeves and we are comfortable showing it publicly.

Whereas, with Fe users, I find it difficult to discern closeness. It's almost feels like you can interchange me with another person and they will respond in a largely similar manner with very little deviation.

And I also notice Fe users have this uncanny ability to mirror moods, mannerisms and energy. So sometimes I am left wondering - was this interaction based on mirrored energy or genuine interest?

Now, of course, my sample size is small and limited to my very limited social circle as an INFP.

Perhaps, for Fe users, the level of closeness between Fe users is blindingly obvious but I'm missing the signals because of my dominant Fi.

Out of curiousity, how do you discern where you stand relationally with another Fe user?

What are some telltale signs about how an Fe user feels about you that I am blind to?

If you are an Fi user, do you let others who are close to you know where they stand in your life? Or is it more of an INFP dynamic / other non-MBTI factors in play?

As things change, people's behaviours will change and personality types will present in new ways. True or false?

For example, an ISTJ may have been very rigid in the 1950s about gender expectations, but nowadays wouldn't care that much.

An INFJ may have forced themselves to be more SJ-like in the 1950s, but has more freedom now.

What do you think?

Idk it just feels like the more normalized MBTI has become, its easier for people to say "I did this because I'm ____" or "I can't do that I'm an ____". I'm curious what others think.. Could this be a modern form of self-handicapping (psychology)

I want to hear your stories where you went to type people and it was immediately obvious that someone is a specific type.

Like I typed my entire class this year and one kid I knew for being the most popular kid and was really mean to me so I immediately knew he's an ESFP because it was extremely obvious. Another time I saw one character in Young Sheldon that with the vibes I knew it was IxFP and once the character said that they like drawing abstract things I knew it was an INFP. What are your stories?

I am still unsure about my type but I believe I am ENFP. Yes, I looked into cognitive functions, and I think Ne-Fi-Te-Si fits. I do fit into some stereotypes of my type, but only to an extent, and it’s not all stereotypes either.

But looking at some characters, they have different MBTIs and don’t fit into ENFP stereotypes at all.

For example:

Ema Skye from Ace Attorney, who I believe to be INTP. I identify especially to her AJ version. She’s sarcastic, snarky, passionate about the things she likes and dreams, but very unsatisfied with her current life, so she comes off as grumpy, only showing her more fun side when it’s something she truly likes ( in her case, forensics ). I am ENFP but you have no idea of how much that describes me.

Does that make sense?

which would you prefer as friend or lover

Who would make a better match and why

I am an ISTP woman and i recently met an ENTJ guy who i really ended up liking. We were completely polar opposites in almost everything but that was more intriguing to me than something to be put off by for the most part. Things were going well, we were both very open about our growing interest in each other but then we hit a dead end. I am usually a very straightforward person. If i see something i want, i am going to do everything I can to get it and the same applies for relationships. He is very different from that, in the sense where he seemed more comfortable in seeing where it went and taking it from there than actually diving headfirst into it. We had many conversations about the potential complications of our future and how the both of us were alright with it because we genuinely enjoyed spending time with each other. The moment I tell him that I am starting to get attached, its like he immediately began calculating all the possibilities and stopped having the answers to anything. He made it clear that he wanted to do something but this took him by surprise which lead him to feel stuck. I already did know that his eq was rather under-developed because while he is extremely intelligent, he seems to have no idea of how people work, but i always thought he was the kind of person who would go for what he want. Is this something that is common across ENTJs?

I'm an INFJ (Ni-dom) and as an enneagram type 5 I think (or at least would like to believe) that I have a pretty well-developed Ne-nemesis, which allows me to brainstorm some possibilities before my Ni sees what works best (this has helped me as an amateur writer/storycrafter in trying to find the sequence of events that resonate the best with the story I want to tell).

So with that in mind, I'd like some help in understanding how this would work in reverse, with an Ni-nemesis countering/assisting an Ne-dom. Can someone (preferably the Ne-doms, ENFP and ENTP) help me understand this?

Edit: I think I misunderstood what Ne does. Sorry, I try to connect a lot of stuff to cognitive functions and sometimes I confuse regular brain capabilities with cognitive functions. Anyone can brainstorm ideas, but Ne is the "what if" generator of sorts. Fwiw though I still think my Ne-nemesis is well-developed but I put the wrong reasoning. I think it's well-developed because I've learned not to be too judgemental about people in order to properly understand them.

Edit #2: Strikethroughed some incorrect stuff.

(Key context for how he felt where through text This isn’t working for me, I’m not feeling it and This is going nowhere) he made me feel cared for and loved and before he ghosted me he said that I deserve to be in a partnership with someone and he doesn’t think most people do so that stung, I will say that we did have a power imbalance but I just wanted a friendship with him, I did admittedly text too much even after he told me to stop which I regret a little bit but I just wanted him to communicate how he felt more

How can INFPs learn to see reality for what it is?
I think INFPs often use their imagination as a way to cope with pain.
When they stop fantasizing, they’re forced to face how painful reality is. And when reality becomes too painful, they retreat into their imagination.
I think INFPs can easily fall into this kind of cycle. At least, that’s how it works for me.
Do healthy INFPs not experience this?
I personally feel that Fi, Ne, Si, and Te are cognitive functions that make it relatively difficult to see reality as it is. (Of course, if you take this question far enough, it becomes philosophical, so I’m only speaking in comparison to other personality types.)
How can INFPs use these cognitive functions to reality-test their perceptions and see the world more objectively?

„Traditional Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) frameworks operate on rigid categorical boundaries that fail to account for situational cognitive adaptability (e.g., Feeling-dominant individuals utilizing formal logic during academic tasks) and age-dependent behavioral shifts

Dual-Aspect Typology Model (DATM)
A Structural Theory of Cognitive Duality, Developmental Integration, and Functional Leadership Cycles
Every person has two layers.
The Inner Core is the permanent cognitive architecture that does not change.
The Outer Mask is the behavioral adaptation that develops over time. From childhood people are predisposed toward either Sensing or Intuition. This sets the Inner Core. The Outer Mask naturally moves toward the opposite style because that is where the person feels the most psychological peace and completeness.

An Inner INFJ develops an Outer Mask that increasingly resembles ESTP. An Inner ESFP develops toward INTJ. An Inner INTJ develops toward ESFP. An Inner ESTP develops toward INFJ. The person does not become a different type. The Outer Mask simply integrates the complementary style while the Inner Core stays stable.
The Dual-Layer Architecture consists of the Inner Core which is permanent and forms the fundamental information-processing structure, and the Outer Mask which is developmental and handles social, professional, and competitive expression.

There are four Developmental Stages called Dual Integration. Stage 1 Primary Unintegrated means the person operates almost purely from the Inner Core and appears quiet, cautious, and highly internal. Stage 2 Auxiliary Expansion means the auxiliary and tertiary functions become usable in social contexts and the person shows moderate social adaptability. Stage 3 Advanced Integration means the person has strong public command of the opposite behavioral style and appears assertive with high presence. Stage 4 Complete Dual Mastery means the person has full simultaneous access to Inner depth and Outer action. Higher stages create more life peace because the split between who I am inside and how I appear outside becomes smaller.

The sixteen types form four Functional Quadras based on preferred leadership style. No group wants to lead permanently. Each prefers to lead only when the previous group has finished its phase.

Presence and Reform includes ESFP, INTJ, ESTP and INFJ. Their core drive is to disrupt, assert presence and break structures. They act as rebels and revolutionaries and come first in the cycle.

Process Execution includes ENTJ, ISFP, ENFJ and ISTP. Their core drive is to turn vision into running systems. They act as action-takers and operators and come second.

Guidance and Mentorship includes ENFP, ISTJ, ENTP and ISFJ. Their core drive is to prepare and develop the next generation. They act as helpers and mentors and come third.

Defense and Advocacy includes ESTJ, INFP, INTP and ESFJ. Their core drive is to protect principles and boundaries. They act as protectors and advocates and come fourth. The cycle works as follows. Rebels create rupture, Operators stabilize and implement, Mentors educate and prepare, Protectors defend the new order, and the cycle restarts when the order becomes rigid.

Instead of the classic four-letter code DATM uses a Perception axis of either NiSe or NeSi and an Orientation of either O for Others-Focus which uses Fe-Ti or S for Self-Focus which uses Fi-Te. The first and last functions determine the value axis of Fe or Fi. This governs how the person participates in collective life. O-types prioritize group resonance and collective logic. S-types prioritize internal value consistency and individual efficiency.

In high-stakes situations the dominant and auxiliary functions form specialized Cognitive Processing Engines. There are eight of them. The Ni-Ti engine used by INFJ and ENFJ works as Vision then Logic and aims for the long-term end-state first then the precise path. The Ti-Ni engine used by ISTP and ESTP works as Logic then Vision and aims for immediate leverage then foresight. The Ni-Te engine used by INTJ and ESFP works as Vision then Execution and aims for the outcome first then resource control. The Te-Ni engine used by ENTJ and ISFP works as Execution then Vision and aims for immediate action with continuous adjustment. The Si-Ti engine used by ISTJ and ESTJ works as Experience then Logic. The Ti-Si engine used by INTP and ENTP works as Logic then Experience. The Si-Te engine used by ISFJ and ESFJ works as Experience then Execution. The Te-Si engine used by ESTJ and ISTJ works as Execution then Experience.

No one can develop all eight functions equally. A permanent deficit is structural and not a personal failure. The Shadow Health Metrics use plus for Enhanced meaning actively usable and sometimes over-developed, minus for Deficient meaning a clear blind spot or stress point, and double equals for Balanced meaning stable and neither a strength nor a liability. A completely flat profile is theoretically impossible. The necessary deficit maintains psychological tension and growth drive.
The Diagnostic Notation uses the format Stage point Axis Orientation then the Shadow String. An example is 3.NiSeO plus minus equals equals. This means Stage 3, NiSe axis, Others-Focus, Ne enhanced, Te deficient, and Si and Fi balanced. The base type remains INFJ. The notation only describes the current dual configuration and health profile.

Hi. I am very annoying with this topic, sorry in advance.

I just can't seem to grasp the difference between these functions; Ni vs Si, Ti vs Te, SPECIALLY in myself.

It intrigues me, and I always come back to this, ALWAYS.

I used to think I had Te in second place, but I am not so sure; I don't trust the resources I find to study this further because I find them rather superficial or not providing the explanation I am looking for.

Any help will be appreciated, since I've been obsessed with this for an embarrassing amount of time, and I hate how I am not able to reach a conclusion. I know it's not that deep, but this is my last resort, thanks.

So here's what I think, S types that analyze well often think they're N types. Se and Te are often confused as they sometimes look similar. Te is occasionally confused for Ti and it's that way the other way around as well. Fi is often confused for Fe, and again the same way the other way around as well.

My 42F ISFP best friend of 22 years doesn’t seem to ever care about seeing me (44F ENTJ) in real life. She has always been strangely precious to me. Ive never had someone make me feel so safe, accepted, and amused. After 16ish years of mutual behavior, she began seeming reluctant/burdened/too-tired to see me in real life very often over the last 6 years.
 
We live compatible lives. Children of similar ages who get along, same incomes, live 30 min away from each other, mutual friends, etc.
 
She still would text daily and say things like “everyone makes me crazy but you” “we should try to go on a trip together this summer” “you should come over to watch that movie soon” but never follows through anymore. I see her only at group events a few times a year. She seems so exhausted and burdened by absolutely any upcoming event. She never wants to plan anything. I can’t help but take it extremely personally at this point.
 
Ive explained this to her a few times now. In 2022, 2025 and two weeks ago. Both times she said she sucks and is awful and she hates herself, and then we barely talk for a few months and then go back to normal. We will see what happens with this time.
 
She does see mom friends but she says she has to or her son will be excluded from events. She also has a work good friend that I think she sees a lot more often than she lets on.
 
Ive never been jealous in any way. I always had too many friends and overcommitted myself and ive never been needy of anyone in my life, but here I am, middle-aged, and so mopey and sad that this friend doesn’t prioritize me.
 
Ive tried holding back on how much I talk about “why people are the way they are” and other abstract things that were never that interesting to her.
 
She very often talks about being unhappy in her life, but when I begin talking about ideas to help, or just processes of acceptance, she goes silent. So then I switched gears and tried to be like “lets do crafts with our daughters and have movies playing in the background” and all light-hearted, creative stuff—but no. I also tried to just help her run errands or organize her basement, but no.
 
Does she flat-out not like me anymore/moved-on from me and I’m not getting the hint? Or is her capacity for friendships/events truly so low she can’t fit me in for years? I really do not understand ISFPs at all so I’m struggling so much here.

(Relationships in general not only romantic)

I was thinking that maybe MBTI types with dominant Ti, might mentally detach from relationships once they no longer align with their internal principles or trust.

And if they weren't confrontational, they might quietly redefine such relationship as sometimes something maintained out of necessity or the sake of the long history, rather than genuine attachment.

Thus, temporary psychologically, even when it continues socially.

I want to hear your thoughts on this! Because I feel Te doms like ENTJ for example could have the same reaction aswell.

Edit: I mean relationships in general not romantic relationships.

Is ENFJ 4w5 so/sx 451 ELVF Melancholic-Sanguine a realistic type? If so, would it be an intriguing character to follow around? If it is, in theory, not a realistic type— how so?

Cant believe i had to repost ts just cuz the 1st one got meme pic on it and apparently its a crime, so here it is

Get yo a$$ here and listen yo i cant believe im acting like mom and reminding y’all here and im ENTP, but this getting outta hand

I got to read 3 similar topic from just 3 swipes of my finger that I had to comment 3x for all of them, i even just copy pasted it.

All those 3 are talking about golden pairings, and i was like ‘why are they focusing too much on pairings or someone’s mbti for romantic partnership?

Also similar with haters like why people demonizing a certain mbti just cuz of stereotypes

Then I realized y’all people seems to forgot, but:

<MBTI is not black or white, its a SPECTRUMMMM>

Its NOT who is sensor living in moment vs intuitive living in their heads.

Everyone is a thinker AND a feeler. Everyone also lives in a moment AND still have strong intuition. Every introverts also party and every extrovert needs alone time. And a lot of Js are open minded and loads of P folks are good are decisive.

MBTI tells you which they prioritize, yes, but sometimes one’s level in the spectrum is sooooo in the middle, the difference between being thinker and feeler or whether one is introvert or extrovert is just a thread thin 🧵 it dont tell yo sht what they value, their morals, or who they are as a person.

I see stuff like this in almost every post and every replies
And people be acting like they dont know ts

and STOP GENERALIZING (if i see one more INFP or ESTJ or other mbti insults one more time)

Just cuz u had some dramatic bs encounter about one mbti, u still dont get to drag everyone else on yo discriminating bs.

U dont get my respect if u treat people as letters rather than individuals with paper thin differences, and your experience wont excuse ur awful a$$ attitude. People w/ diff mbti has many similarities with each other and have barely any differences.

For people asking about golden pairing shts, it works for sum, and not for others, its not that deep bruh, so stop shitting on those people who like it.

Get yo a$$ here on my debate table if im wrong

These days I have been thinking about how much ISFP’s function stack is literally perfect. I know this sounds a bit stupid but having Se and Ni in the middle sounds like heaven. As an INFJ with inferior Se and Ni dom I feel like I plan everything in my head like a maniac and then can’t actually do shit. Being able to take action without overthinking everything but still making plans and putting them into action sounds like a dream

I know ISFP isn’t the only type to have those two in the middle but I hate how my Fe acts in a lot of situations. It is the thing that makes me not see what I want and always thinks about the others. Literally when something bad happens to me I say I’m glad because it didn’t happen to someone else that would’ve felt worse. Or anything I like I know I can’t openly talk about it to people because I know I might stop liking it just cause they didn’t.

Then there is Fi which sounds so appealing. People around me that use Fi? I literally admire how they act. Yeah they might seem really opposite to me in situations but really I wish I thought or acted like them.

Even their blind spot sounds the most manageable. Ne blind spot? Yeah I know that’s not something that’s gonna be super easy but I don’t see it being difficult either. Most people even say Ne is the best blind spot to have

Fi-Se-Ni-Te just sounds like the perfect order and I don’t know how I can explain it😭

I know these are my own idealizations and yeah I know being an ISFP isn’t gonna be perfect either. It’s a stupid thought that came to my mind.

I have no hate towards my type, I actually do love being an INFJ in so many ways and wouldn’t wanna change it at all but still when I was thinking about stack rankings I realized how ISFP’s stack sounds like the most perfect to me. To all you ISFP’s out there I really do admire and love y’all💗

If an ENTP goes out into the world and says they are an introverted sensor (Si), and people listen to his dialog, what is the likelihood that after talking to him people are more informed about who an extroverted intuitive actually is?

What are the odds that if I call myself an ISFJ but my dialogue sounds less like "dairy comes from cows" and more like "cows are the nutritional dairy queens of America", people will still take my word for it?

So I work with two people who are basically the INTP vs ISTP stereotype. Same degree, similar IQ scores, but one gets invited to big picture meetings while the other gets called whenever equipment breaks or an experiment goes sideways.

Guess which one management thinks has more potential lol.

The INTP is great at explaining theories and pitching ideas. The ISTP is the one who actually notices when those ideas won't work in practice. But apparently being able to explain a problem sounds smarter than being able to fix it.

I've noticed this a lot with the whole N vs S thing. You can have a Sensor who understands a system inside out, but if they aren't good at talking about it in abstract terms, people underestimate them.

I ran into this myself when I was applying for jobs. I knew I was good at solving problems, but interviews made me feel like I was terrible at explaining anything. I started writing down actual situations I'd dealt with and how I handled them. I even tried career assessments like the coached test because I was struggling to put my strengths into words. Helped me think about how I approach problems rather than trying to present myself as some big picture thinker.

It made me realize I didn't have to sound like a stereotypical intuitive to explain why I was good at my job.

Does anyone else feel like certain types get mistaken for being smarter just because they're better at talking about their ideas??

For context, I am INFJ who does often feel that spark with ENTPs, but I do think there are also good theoretical grounds for why golden pairs should work based on cognitive functions.

To find your golden pair, first invert the attitude of the dominant function. So as an Ni-dom, I am looking for an Ne-dom. Then choose the type which shares your middle functions. For me that's Fe and Ti which are also the middle functions of ENTP. So ENTP is my golden pair.

Using this method always results in a very elegant arrangement of cognitive functions that means there is little clashing. Two of my painful functions which are fragile areas of the psyche, Se and Fi, the inferior and the critical parent, are very unvalued in ENTP. Similarly, ENTP has Si and Te as inferior and critical parent which are also functions I very rarely used.

Get this - I am genuinely very impressed when ENXPs use Si because even though they are insecure about it, for me it seems way better than my Si usage. Same goes for Te. Talking to your golden pair is a situation where your insecurities are proven false. In a way, your golden pair will see you as your ideal self in terms of cognitive development.

The other functions are also neatly arranged to not cause issues. The parent and child functions are matching which results in a shared understanding of things, meanwhile the opposite dominant is not annoying because both people are still dominant in the same area, in my case intuition. And the nemesis function is by far the best shadow function to deal with in another person.

I'm not saying that you have a soulmate who has to be your golden pair. You're also likely to have a friend who is your golden pair or a different kind of connection. Just wanted to point out that they do make theoretical sense, and also to advocate for a particular vision of golden pairs because people seem to have different takes on what types are golden pairs!