TW: Suicide

My Dad FaceTimed me a couple hours ago and immediately asked me to add all of my siblings to the call… so I knew something was wrong. As we waited for each of them to answer, I kept wracking my brain for what he was about to tell us.

Never did I think the words, “Your grandfather took his own life today,” would come out of his mouth. I have never seen my Dad cry until today.

I guess my Grandpa emptied my grandparents’ checking and savings accounts, and a few weeks ago my Grandma found out. When she asked him where the money was and how long he’d been hiding it from her, he replied plainly, “Greed. You never take any risks.”

My grandfather has always been amazing with money. In fact, he was the one who taught me how to invest, which stocks pay the highest dividends, and how to reinvest those dividends back into more stocks. I can’t even fathom that he’d be reckless with their money or make bad financial decisions.

But alas, here we are. Both checking and savings accounts just… empty. My grandmother wondering where the money went and who she married. And my grandfather, a proud man who maybe felt trapped and shame? Who could’ve potentially been living a double life? Who wasn’t as financially stable as we all thought he was?

The police officers found a letter in his pocket and would only tell us that it said he was sorry and he loved my Grandma. They won’t let us have or read the whole thing until they’ve completed their investigation.

My gut says the answer is in that letter. And that it’s not something we thought he was ever capable of doing.

I guess my confession here is that I think he felt trapped in the marriage to my Grandma and thought that was the only way out of it. I think he ended his life out of spite. For getting caught. For being monitored so closely. For feeling suffocated. I think he was selfish for only thinking of himself in that moment and not about the aftermath or how it would impact my grandmother. And I guess I also confess that it breaks my heart to even think those thoughts about him.

He walked into a gun store today and bought a rifle. With her credit card. Then he drove home to pick her up and take her to a doctor’s appointment because she can’t drive. And instead of getting out of the car and going inside, he walked into the backyard and took his own life. And she heard the shot. He knew she would find him.

I confess I am so angry with him for what he’s done to her and to our family.

I honestly don't even know how to start this because if anyone had told me a year ago that this would happen, I would've laughed in their face.

For some background, my best friend, let's call him Jake (18M), and I (18F) have known each other literally our entire lives. Our moms met when they were younger and became best friends, so naturally, Jake and I grew up together. Family dinners, birthdays, holidays, sleepovers, vacations, you name it. If one family was doing something, the other family was usually invited.

Our moms joke that we're basically their kids together. They have always said that someday we'd probably end up married, and we'd both immediately gag and tell them to shut up.

Jake has always been my person. He's the first person I call when something happens, the person who knows every embarrassing thing about me, and the person I can sit in complete silence with without it being awkward.

We've always been close, but recently, something changed.

We're currently on vacation with both of our families. It's something we've done almost every October since we were little. We're both 18 now, so our parents have started giving us more freedom instead of treating us like we're still ten years old.

A few nights into the trip, Jake and I were sitting together after everyone else had gone to bed. We were talking about relationships since we both recently broke up with our exes, past crushes, and the usual random stuff we talk about at night.

Somehow, the conversation turned into whether we'd ever considered dating each other.

We laughed at first because, seriously, we've known each other since we were practically babies. But then things got quiet, and I realized neither of us was actually laughing anymore.

He admitted he'd thought about it before.

I told him I had too.

And one thing led to another, and we kissed.

I wish I could say we immediately talked about it and figured everything out, but we didn't. We ended up kissing again the next night, and now we've started secretly sleeping together while we're on vacation.

I'm not going to get into the intimate details, but the biggest thing is that this isn't just some random vacation fling with a guy I barely know. This is Jake. My BEST FRIEND. The guy who's been in practically every childhood memory I have.

And the confusing part? I don't regret it.

Being around him feels different now. Every time he looks at me across the dinner table, I have to pretend nothing is happening. When our moms start talking about how cute we were as little kids, I nearly choke on my drink because if they knew what was happening now, they'd probably lose their minds in a good way of course same with our sisters since they want to be related.

The best part is that Jake seems just as happy about this as I am. He's been more affectionate clingy and, he keeps finding excuses to be around me, and last night he told me he doesn't want this to be something that only happens on vacation and I don't want that either i want this to be a actual relationship.

Edit: Okay everyone this is a real story! But i made it way too long and I wanted it to sound more fluent! So did I use chat gpt for errors and repeats of words cause I use "like" and "because" way too much! So other than that this story is true and I did write it!

Sharing it here and may seem weird, but had a lasik surgery at 23 and the protocol says no water splashing in the eyes for 15 days to avoid any infections.

My mom offered to bathe me so that I just stand up and she soaped me and scrubbed me..It was really odd being nude in front of her after almost after 12 years ( last was when I was 10 yo). I got even hard unintentionally a few times and she ignored it maybe as it's not unnatural. It's something different being nude at 10 yo and at 22 when ur totally grown up and have a full bush down there and hard right in front of your mom. It felt odd for the first couple of days then got used to it.

I was dating a doctor briefly. I ended it because it became increasingly obvious he didn’t understand consent and was manipulative. He was also a horrible doctor and it struck me that he enjoys violating people. He told me he never has a bad day at work but people died in there all the time. He would send me patient identifiable records and laugh about what happened to them. Their names and ages. I still have them and would never share them. I cannot emphasise the cruel cold way he talked about his patients. He said he found sedating people satisfying (he is in ED). He belittled people for not being able to deal with pain. He once described holding down a small child for a medical procedure and the way he talked about it was terrifying. He thought treating many people was a waste of money and time. He offered to do any prescriptions for me after meeting twice and I declined. When I brought up the patient records being shared he said “it hasn’t been an issue so far”. I know deep down he doesn’t deserve to be a doctor. He has zero compassion and cannot abide by the simplest code that even non medical professionals know. But I just can’t make myself report it and I don’t know why. I feel so guilty about ruining someone’s life and I will never look at a hospital the same.

Edit: Hi everyone, I hear you. I’m sorry to hear so many of you have suffered due to malpractice. I’ve contacted the relevant authority for my region to see what the process involves. I have no evidence for any of the above besides the patient notes + identities he sent me. Obviously I can’t possibly know how he actually treats patients at work but the things he said are scary and I imagine they would show eventually.

Title pretty much sums it up. When it comes to bedroom activities my husband is very much the “lovemaking” type, now don’t get me wrong, I love that, and it’s still amazing. I just wish he would manhandle me for once.

We’ve talked about our preferences and things we’re into, so he knows I’m into the whole cooking, hair pulling, fucking me hard thing. I think he may feel a bit awkward doing that; I’ve tried to do things to get him comfortable, but nothing really seems to work.

I love my husband with all my heart and he’s my best friend. I just wish he’d fuck my brains out, make me his sex slave for a day, and do whatever he wants with me.

Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She is a friend of a family member. From time to time I go over to help my sister clean her house. The lady is in her early 50s and she cant move her body. over the past 3 months me and her began talking more and more to the point were we have both gotten to know one another at a more intimate level. During one of our conversations, she mentioned to me she has not been intimate with anyone for over 10 years and told me that before she dies she wants to feel wanted once again. I recently asked her If I could help her fulfill those needs and she accepted.

**Just to clarify, she is physically disabled, NOT mentally disabled**.

It’s been long enough. I must confess. I just wrote the names of books in so I would get free Pizza Hut personal pizzas.

I regret nothing.

Throwaway because my sister is active on Reddit, and if my mom ever found out the truth it would completely break her heart.

Every November for the past three years, I’ve given my parents the same rehearsed, tearful phone call. I tell them money is just too tight, my freelance work dried up, and I simply cant afford the $500 plane ticket back to Ohio. My mom always sighs, tells me she understands, and mails me a $50 grocery gift card so I can "have a nice little dinner."

The sickening truth is, I make over six figures. I have plenty of savings. instead of flying home to get trapped in four days of screaming political arguments, passive-aggressive comments about my weight and my dad getting hammered before noon, I book a boutique hotel forty minutes from my apartment. I order expensive Thai food, drink wine in a hot bath, and read books in absolute dead silence. It is literally teh only time all year my nervous system completely resets.

i feel like a monster every time I cash that $50 grocery card she sends me out of her pension. I know I’m taking the coward's way out by lying instead of setting boundaries, but those four days of pure silence keep me sane for the entire year.

when i was really young my sister (whose older by three years) and i would take showers together and she would force me to make out with her. i always fought back and would really dread it and never enjoyed it but idk if this counts as molestation or if it’s at the borderline yknow. any advice would be welcome.

I 28F have been in a relationship with my BF 34M for about a year now. The sexual dissatisfaction has been so bad that every day i think about downloading tinder or hiring a male prostitute.

I have gone as far as researching male prostitutes in my areas, down to cost and how i can hide the communication from my partner.

He is a great guy, but completely useless in bed.

When i have brought this up in the past (nicely) he has been receptive to the conversation but nothing has changed.

He last about 30 seconds to a minute and has zero interest in forplay.

He went to a dr who confirmed his testosterone is actually high and he is in good sexual health for his age.

I accepted that he just didn't have the stamina and tried to work on forplay.

He is not religious but grew up in muslim country and has very different ideas on sex then i do. Oral is off the table in both directions no chance of that ever changing and he does not want to have the conversation again because it is "dirty" and says that thats his culture and i need to accept that. I do cause it is the only thing he ask of me.

So i tried to get him to use his hands, he rubs my clit for 10 seconds and acts like a hero. I explain to him he is impatient and he needs to do it longer and he listened and extends to 15-20 sonds maybe. His impatience is so obvious that it pulls me out of the mood and i just want him stop, hurry up and get his satisfaction so i can put my clothes back on.

I am so pent up i am at work right now posting on reddit instead of working to stop myself downloading a dating app to cheat.

Idk what to do

My husband loves the "just waxed" feel of my pussy. He refers to it as his "Adult Slip 'n Slide." However, while I do like that he takes pleasure in it, pleasing him (or anyone else) isn't why I do it.

I do it for purely selfish reasons. I do it for the same reason I continue to dye my roots every month. I'm 57yo, and don't want any gray hairs to remind me I'm getting old.

I use to shave it, but find waxing to be less effort. Maybe I'll move to laser. And don't even start with dying it. While I might put it on my head, it's never going near my cootch.

My dad died when I was 17 after he and my mom had been together for over 30 years and married for 25 of them. She started dating a year after he died and then suddenly I was 21 and my mom asks if we can meet up for dinner and she tells me she got married. Almost immediately afterward she started calling her new husband the love of her life and how he was the best man she has ever known and how she has never loved anyone as much as him. The whole conversation was a mindfuck and she wasn't telling just me those things but at a family members wedding a few weeks later she was saying the same stuff.

On one hand it was nice to see her happy but it hurt to hear her talk like that after dad. Someone else mentioned it and she glossed over the issue and when it came up again she told them not to make her husband feel insecure or like he's second best by bringing up dad like that. She made a point of looking directly at me when she said that too.

I honestly didn't want to hear stuff like that so I started avoiding her and we've grown apart a lot in the last several years. So much so I got married and she wasn't there and I didn't tell her afterward either. She has tried to plan dinners and such with me but I wasn't interested in hearing her gush. She still talks like that too. Other family members have distanced themselves a little because they grow tired of hearing it. And he doesn't even have to be there for her to be like that. There are many times she says it for the love of saying it and he's not around to hear her. Plus she wants me to spend more time with him so we can get to know each other.

I know it hurts her feelings and she has wondered why. But given her reaction to people telling her to tone this shit down I would rather keep avoiding her and leaving her in the dark. She doesn't have to change for anyone but I really don't want to hear it. Honestly it hurts to hear her talk like that around me.

In July a man followed me home and attempted to undress me at my doorstep, I managed to make it inside as he was lifting up my dress. I was already a sexual assault survivor and already suffered from ptsd due to it. It has only gotten worse since then. Since then I’ve had to explain the events that transpired to disrespectful medical professionals, friends, family, my therapist and cops who didn’t really care. I even recounted the events for a documentary short film (that one was self inflicted). I thought it was over, I really hoped I just wouldn’t have to tell my story ever again, but about an hour ago two cops showed up at my door and summoned me to court for me to testify. I just want to cry, I don’t want to do it, I don’t think I can handle it, but people keep telling me that it’s good news. I know logically speaking going to the police was the right thing to do, to stop him from doing it again, but I regretted it from the moment I did it, I wish I could have just lived my life without having to be subjected to the legal side of things.

I just want a girl to hookup with cuddle & watch a movie. Make out session 😋 I’ve never been with a girl but it’s definitely something recently I’ve been wanting.

Hi!
I’m F(26) and living alone in a city where no one knows me. (Cebu)
Recently I’ve been to numerous solo trips. And it is honestly so refreshing. But I’m afraid I might stay this way forever. On the other hand, I also want to have a family, and children.

I’ve tried dating apps. Nothing had worked so far. I’ve never gotten a genuine connection off of it. Then I saw a post on Threads that they have a higher chance to go on a date via Reddit.
So now, I am shooting my shot here.

Is anyone down for a date? Btw I’m interested on Males, I prefer older than me and is taller than me - I’m 155cm btw. I have a stable job, good looking, outgoing.

Type of man I want to date: Date to marry, has income, vocal with what they want, good looking, has hobbies as well, and open minded

Feel free to slide in my DMs! Happy to entertain!
Please make a decent introduction too!

Probably cliche, but for me it was new. I (28 M) had a girl best friend (27 F) and one day we started talking deeply and one thing led to another and started talking sex. But we regret it immediately as eventually this may ruin our relationship.

But on the next day, when I was at her place, I don't know my pov with her changed. I couldn't resist looking at her tits and ass, because of all her fantasies she shared with me over the text

All those things that she wanted to do to me, and things she wanted me to do.

What happened next needs a little context. Even though it's new for me, it wasn't for her. She has had a ton of experience before.

And This is a woman whose thoughts are not like all. For her, even the size matters which was a shocker to me, i thought it was complete nonsense. And the one thing she loves to do to a guy is, bl*w job. At some point I start thinking like whether I am chatting with a horny guy (sorry for being sexist). Because basically this person is into everything that we see in porn.

Now let's come back, she wasn't talking like she used to. At this point someone here could relate to me and the things passing through my head. And on top of that I got a boner. I don't know, i yelled like ' i am having a boner, I can't take it anymore my head will explode'.

She asked, 'why are you tell me?'

I became little weird here and said, if we are not going to touch each other, i want to jerk off looking at you.

She asked me a lot of questions like why,? Why don't you go in washroom? Look at some porn

All she never said was No.

I insisted , she said like whatever.

As I took my pants off, something probably triggered her, she came to me and got on her knees and started sucking on it. It was the extreme moment in my life, and i understood the gwak gwak sound is actually real. But it was a bit shameful because I felt like coming and ran to the washroom. Understand, this is new to me. Later she asked me why did you run to washroom? Don't ruin the flow, Just come on my face or tits. And if you want to cum in my mouth don't ask for permission, make me open my mouth if I am rejecting based on my mood, then cum on face or somewhere else.

I was completely lost at this point...

But this bj routine kept on going, and gradually I started showing her who is the boss ( I am not insulting her. that's what she wants, me to dominate her).

When we got into actual sex, i understood that our interests were different. She was more into rough kind of sex, wants me to beat her, choke her, bite her, fu*k her with aggression.. One day I fucked her mouth really hard down her throat, and i apologized later. But she said, at that moment she wanted it and enjoyed it. But I started feeling like I hurt someone physically. Probably because I was a noob at that time

I asked her whether she has taken it in her ass. She said 'yes, but I don't think you are ready to do my ass.' she was right though. She literally told me like she need a partner who can bang her like it's the end of the world.

After a few months she got engaged, but she started sending me her nudes and used to come on video call to masturbate together. She said we left things incomplete and she wants to satisfy me completely.

I told her you don't need to do that and we agreed to stop this.

What an experience though!

A year ago, I got a new flatmate. My flat is large and has many rooms so it’s easy to ignore them. She was cute girl living with her sister. At first, I wasn’t really attracted to her, especially after knowing that she made a living through being an escort in clubs…etc.
But then, one day she asked me to watch her cat, we exchanged numbers and that was that. We kept talking casually after that, we weren’t really strangers anymore.

Then one night, after hearing that she came home drunk. She called me and simply said “do you want to come sleep with me?”

I was a 26 year old virgin man, who watched porn regularly and was seriously struggling with loneliness since I was living alone in a new country.

I ended up sleeping with her that night, but we didn’t have sex, just sleep. It gave me a thrill I never had before. I loved it.

A month passed by and I found myself sleeping with her almost everyday. And then I ended up having sex with her, specifically after she said that she’ll stop having sex with other men for me. And she did.

Few months passed by, and we became a couple. We slept together for almost a year before we broke it off 20 days ago. During that year a lot happened. Our landlord had asked her to come and live with her, just like that, she knew she was an escort but no one knew about us being together.of course she told him no but sometimes he goes to her room and sits with her and her sister. I fought with her about that many times and at times she just comes to my room when I’m home and when he’s there. But what kills me most is, since she doesn’t really know how to do anything else, she still sees a client and she swore to me that she doesn’t have sex with him, they only go out for coffee. And when I tell her how is that possible she answers with “some people are like that you don’t know.” And for some reason, I believe her.

That year was a strange one for me. I genuinely loved being with her. But we fought a lot, she was extremely jealous. When I finish late from work she doesn’t trust me, she asks for video proofs of where I am, I remember even when I feel like going out for a walk alone or go to the market she feels upset. When we fight, she says that she doesn’t trust me and when I tell her that maybe I shouldn’t trust her either, she answers with something like: “ok I will go fuck another then if you don’t believe that I didn’t do anything wrong”. She has called me names that no one else even dares to think about them. She disrespected me, and when I do the same and say hurtful things she says that I don’t respect her. When we sleep in her room and I make the slightest bit of noise, she wakes up and starts slamming things, and when I feel upset about do that and try to go out and go to my room, she pushes me and slams the door behind me. She doesn’t really like what I like and when I try to do the things I like like watching certain shows, or go play video games in my room she gets upset, and on one occasion, when I went to my room to do the latter, she pushed and slammed the door shut.

As I mentioned, around 20 days ago, we broke it off. I will admit that out of weakness I texted her multiple times about getting back together, and I basically succeeded, and then she gave me an ultimatum:
“If you want us to be together, your full time after work is mine, you will not talk to the neighbor, your days off are mine fully and you have to spend them with me, if you go out, you will go out with me”

I respectfully declined, and she said ok. I can see her going home from clubs at night, somehow believing that she’s only there with her sister, who is also an escort and an alcoholic. She was my first everything, everything, and I know it’s embarrassing for a 28 year old to say that. I wonder if I can really get over all of this. I went back to smoking after quitting for 7 years, and I’ve been watching porn regularly again, finding myself watching things I never thought of watching…cuck porn, man?

I can’t figure out if she actually loved me or just wanted someone normal to love her. She had love in her believe me, and she gave that to me, and I loved it, especially knowing that I didn’t really experience physical love as a kid.

Right now I miss her a lot, everything reminds me of her and I want to be with her again. But I know she is not good for me, despite her beauty and my loneliness.

So I (16M) was sitting in my lounge on my phone when my mom called my name from the kitchen. I answered back and she didn't respond, so I went back to scrolling. Then she came to the lounge and took my phone, she threatened to go through my discord. I asked her not to and she asked what I was trying to hide... I said that they're was nothing, I just didn't want her to see my conversations. She asked what kind of things I had on my phone, asking if it was porn. I said that there was some that my friends sent but nothing crazy. She asked what kind of stuff so I told her about a goth girl (pinkchyu) that my friends sent in the discord. She looked her up and found her onlyfans… She started making fun of me and then called my dad... my dad is a bit of a gooner so he started defending me and saying that she must give my phone back. She did give it back and she seemed to find it more funny than concerning, im just glad that she didn't find any of the REALLY bad stuff...

I don't want her to see anything worse, I was thinking about locking the app, but I think that would just look more suspicious. Anyone have any ideas?

Last night, my boyfriend and I nearly got robbed by a gang during a deal worth over $45,000. They changed the meeting location to somewhere “chiller,” which was already suspicious. When we arrived, one of them went to their car, but my boyfriend never stepped inside because he thought something was off. They asked to see the product, but when he said he wanted to see the cash first, everything went quiet. One pulled a gun to his head while another pulled out a serrated knife. They all started grabbing him, trying to pull him away from our car while I screamed and desperately tried to pull him back inside. One nearly opened my door. I genuinely thought I was going to lose him. Somehow, they ended up driving off like a bunch of bitches with a bag of rubbish from our back seat.

I've been trying to fix it by going to the doctor's but I keep getting brushed off. I've spent so much money on different deodorants and body washes and cleansers. Trust me. I've tried EVERYTHING.

Unfortunately, I was too depressed in general to fix my diet until recently.

Went to a friend's wedding last month and once I started to sweat boom: stinky again. It kills me that seeing folks I haven't so long and I was probably deeply offensive. WORSE - I was in the wedding party.

I genuinely feel like I can't live life anymore until this is fixed. I don't go out much and I never hang out. I've given up on dating.

Lmao it's an entire nightmare.

for starters I am a 36 year old mom to 4 spawns. and I have never said this out loud and it may not seem huge to yall but I crave attention. like CRAVE it. I’m a confident woman. I’m comfortable in my skin. im not some skinny thing. I have a mom bod, short, big thighs, big chest, honey brown eyes. I even get called beautiful. But I just constantly crave thee attention. gender doesn’t matter because I’m attracted to all. I crave being submissive. I crave showing you what you want. I need the compliments. The flirting. The banter. i will be fiesty just to grab your attention. i don’t know where it stems from. I don’t know how to stop. I’ve tried. but I just effin need it. Again may not seem huge but it was hard for me to admit out loud.

Pretty self explanatory. I 25m have started to build muscle and work out consistently to get the attention of other women in my life. I was never really fat (6 foot ~200 when I started) but never also in shape. I love the results I'm getting and the compliments coming from coworkers and other strangers. Confidence is up and flirting is fun again. My wife simply doesn't care about our relationship anymore so I don't really either. Ama 🤷‍♂️

Im not going to bother being anonymous (not that I know how anyway) because nobody I know will see this anyway.

Im in my 30s and ever since I was a kid, I was neglected to the point nobody ever noticed I was there. Whether I was in the same building, room or something, unless I was right in front of them. That includes my parents, grandparents, teachers, even people my own age.

Mother would always yell at me for "scaring her" or "sneaking up on her" when I never did. I would just walk into a room, nothing special, no sneaking, nothing. People would call me a ninja, but not in a good way.

I once ran away from home (my grandparents house) which was on a property and also 5kms out of town. I put my shoes on and just walked out. I walked into town on my own. I cant remember exactly how old I was, but I dont think i was a teenager. I might have been between 8-11. Nobody noticed for at least 30-40 minutes. I didnt even try to hide, and yet nobody noticed.

When I was in high school, I told my friend. She didn't believe me and I said: Ill walk right into that room (being renovated and out of bounds), steal something and walk straight back out without sneaking. She agreed, so I did. She looked around and NOBODY even looked in our direction. She thought it was cool. I didnt.

See the downside to never being noticed means people take advantage of that, and when you tell, nobody cares. My story is too long, so right now all Ill say is I was never quiet about the things that happened to me. People; family, friends, professionals, would believe me in a way, but they would never do anything about it.

So many times in my life I had disappeared and nobody would notice until the last minute; when I was 3, I walked out of my mothers house at night. I was told I was found in the back of a mans car.

I would hide in small places, stay out of the house, go for walks in the bush by myself, to parks by myself, etc. Rarely anyone would notice unless I was meant to be doing something prior like chores or babysitting (I am the oldest of...many children and the only female).

I grew up feeling unwanted. Actually, I was unwanted. I was told as much, so I guess it makes sense why I was ignored.

Of course, this carried on into my teenage years and adulthood. I get ignored by everyone still, but whenever I try to talk to someone, I get accused of wanting "attention" so I stop.

I even started putting myself into counselling since I was 15, but, of course, teenagers are "dramatic" and "exaggerate" the situation. I certainly was not. I was terrified of my mother, and also so deeply ignored, I genuinely thought I was invisible when I was a young child.

Just for reference, Im not here for "attention", asking for help, or advice. This is genuinely just a confession that Ive never told anyone. Not that they would listen anyway.

My life story is too long to put here, so Ill answer any questions about that if needed. I just wanted to vent a little. I appreciate it. Thankyou

I met this guy online a few days ago on a hookup app. We talked about doing a cnc scene. I sent him a list of "rules"/boundaries and established a safeword before he came over.

Once he got here we immediately went to the bedroom. after doing our thing for a while, I had to use the safe word. he respected it and stopped. after taking a short break I said we could continue if he was more gentle. so we started having sex again, and at some point I had to use the safeword again. this time he didn't stop. he just switched from one hole to the other, which broke another boundary I had put in place earlier.

after that I just kind of laid there and took it. I didn't protest, or say the safeword again. I don't remember what was going through my head at that moment, I guess i just froze? I don't really remember much of this encounter in all honesty, I got super crossfaded for this hookup so everything is jumbled and fuzzy.

Everyone is saying that I was assaulted/raped, but it doesn't truly feel that way. I know logically what he did was wrong, but it's really not affecting me emotionally. honestly, all in all, I actually had a good time and I really want to see him again.

EDIT: thanks everyone for your kind words and advice. I think I'm starting to have emotions about this. I don't know. I don't think I'll be seeing this man again though.