r/cats • u/Mean_Interest4942 • 7h ago
Advice Advice on getting ready to say bye
I’ve never posted here and i hate that i’m writing this as my first post.
This is my sweet boy, Teddy. He came home to me as a kitten when i was around 13. He is the first pet i had that was mine, as much as a pet could be mine at that age. We grew up together. It’s been ten years and he’s been the best friend a girl could have. he’s even gotten better with age. Each year he’s become sweeter, more cuddly, and smarter. He knows when i’ve slept in too much and comes on the bed to cuddle and ask for pets until im awake enough to get up. He’s the best alarm clock I could ever ask for. He’s been the best friend, especially when i didn’t feel like i had many others.
A few weeks ago i made a vet appointment for him after he started coughing. i’m not sure how long this had been going on before i took notice because in the month before i had been helping my mom prep for surgery then out of town helping my grandma transition to hospice before she passed away. The vet was concerned enough to order an x-ray which showed one definite mass on his lung with another one possible. we were able to get an appointment with the oncologist the following week and they shared the same opinion with the vet that it was likely carcinoma. They did a needle aspirate biopsy to confirm the diagnosis. We got the call a few days ago, confirmed cancer. They also found that he has swelling in either his stomach or small intestine that could be the location of the primary cancer that then spread to his lungs.
I’m so sad. Based on my conversation with the specialist vet the outlook isn’t great. We could try chemo but they aren’t sold on its effectiveness. Surgery wouldn’t be worth it because it already seems to have spread. Most of the options we have are hospice care. I know cats are extremely good at hiding pain but, other than the coughing, which happens maybe twice a week for less than a minute, he’s acting totally normal. It’s hard to grasp how sick he is with such little change in him.
I’m looking for advice in a few things:
- If you’ve experienced anything similar, what can i expect?
- I don’t want him to suffer, and as much as i want him here as long as possible i don’t want him to live in pain. How can i make sure im keeping him comfortable?
- I’m having so much trouble imagining not having him, if anyone has any suggestions on how to cope please let me know.
-i’d love some recommendations on how to make his last months special for him and how to make the most of this time. I want to make as many memories to have once he’s gone as possible.
Thank you for taking the time to read, please give your pets a little extra love for me and teddy 💕
13
u/ZealousidealGas3774 7h ago
I'm so sorry. You clearly gave teddy a great life. Spend some extra good times with him. Lots of churu and treats if tolerable. Cuddles. Peanut, Max, and Princess and Me wish Teddy a smooth end of life transition 💜
it will be hard, there is no way to fill the void of the loss that a childhood pet, or even a pet in general leaves behind. It takes time to heal, Be gentle with yourself.
Best wishes and regards.
11
u/Aromatic-Emu9612 6h ago
Do a day of celebration! Feed that baby deliciousness. Take them somewhere new. Say goodbye.
It fucking sucks. But at least you had the lives together that you did. I wish you the best. I send my love to the both of you. Thank care friend. Meow😻
4
5
6
u/Sirena85 6h ago
The best thing for you to do is be with him as long as you can. He knows he is loved and he has had a wonderful life with a wonderful best friend who was with him every step of the way. Saying goodbye is never easy. Just stay with him and snuggle if he is feeling snuggly. My service dog Bear will be waiting to meet Teddy on the other side until we are able to join them again.
3
u/Mean_Interest4942 6h ago
Thank you, it makes it a bit easier to imagine him being greeted by bear 💕
4
u/Fun-Associate3900 6h ago
Spend every moment you can with him. Look for changes in his personality or daily routine. No one knows your cat better than you. When you notice the change then you’ll know it’s time.
1
u/Mean_Interest4942 6h ago
Thank you, I’ll will definitely keep a close eye on his habits. I’ll love him as much as i can while he’s here and still when he’s not
2
u/Fun-Associate3900 6h ago
I lost my girl to cancer as well. Hers was right above her eye. The vet gave her 4-6 months. I spent every precious moment with her. And while she was still eating and affectionate, she was sleeping a lot more and began rubbing the eye. That was my cue that it was time, I said my final goodbye to her 6 months and 3 days after her diagnosis. That was 2 years ago and I’m still in tears typing this. It’s never easy. My thoughts to you and Teddy. He’s beautiful.
1
u/Mean_Interest4942 1h ago
i’m so sorry about your sweet girl. i hope she and teddy are friends when he gets there
5
u/Alarmed-Shock5394 6h ago
Cuddle him as often as he will let you. Pet him as much as possible. Let him know you are there for him 24/7. Is he sleeps with you, treasure every second. Take LOTS of pics amd vids.I bought one of.those electronic picture frames and load it with all your favorite pics. My baby passed almost 3 years ago, and I still hurt. Our babies arent just "pets", they are our children. 🙏❤️😻
5
u/Mean_Interest4942 6h ago
the electronic picture frame is such a good idea! i’ve already taken so many pictures and videos and won’t stop as long as i can. i never want to forget anything about him
2
u/Sirena85 6h ago
This is only a suggestion, you could take a picture of Teddy and have it turned into a custom diamond art painting if you like that kind of thing. That is what I did as a memorial piece for Bear when he passed.
6
u/TheHesperus 6h ago
I am so, so sorry you and Teddy are going through this, I wish there was some magic answer, but I would advise this:
You don't want him to suffer - once you notice he's in pain don't delay, it's the only kind thing to do.
I'm not sure where you're from but many vets in Australia will make a house call for this one purpose. It made such a difference when the time came for my previous very elderly puss to go to sleep, to be at home with us, in his house, rather than his last moments being put in a carrier, put in a car and being scared at the clinic.
Lastly, be kind to yourself and, when you're ready, rescue another puss - it very much helped us to heal. Not as a replacement, never could be, but a way to save another life. I wish you and Teddy peace...
3
u/OldMathematician5973 6h ago
There's no advice to give. Love on em, treats and junk food, make them comfortable and felt and you've done your part. The hard decision has been made to stop the pain and that's the important part.
3
u/idmontie 4h ago
My cat Pepper had mammary cancer, so I can tell you what happened with her and maybe that can help you prepare for what to expect. She had mammary cancer that we did three surgeries for, but it still spread. It ended up spreading to her lungs, and similar to your Teddy, she started to have trouble breathing. Like you said, cats are good at hiding their pain, so other than some coughing episodes, she did everything she liked to do.
You might experience Teddy start to lose weight, he might get nauseous and associate it with the food he used to like, he might get lethargic and stop wanting to play. All these things happened to Pepper, but she was still so cuddly and loving. She didn't hide or get aggressive with anyone. I'm not sure how normal that is.
There was a wheezing fit she had where she looked like she just gave up and lay on the ground while still coughing rather than fight it like she used to. That's when I knew it was time. We had already planned to put her down with a set date, and I wasn't sure if she was ready to go - but this was what showed me it was time.
It will be difficult, but know you are doing him a kindness by not letting him continue to suffer once you decide it is time. Have the strength to be there for him, knowing he was there for you for his whole life.
I'm sorry you and Teddy have to go through this 💜😔
2
2
u/ShrednButta 6h ago
The best advice I’ve ever heard (and I’ve have taken this approach with many of my animal companions in my time, and it’s been such a relief AND a blessing) is
“This is your companion. No one knows them better, and they know you just as well. Forget your personal feelings about it. Let go of what YOU want the outcome to be. Fill the room with love and respect. Sit down with your kitty cat and ASK THEM if they want to, or are ready to go. They will tell you. 100% of the time. Open your heart to them and accept that every living being has its time. All suffering has meaning as well. They are smart. They know when it’s time, and you will too.”
This allows them to make the decision, and allows you the comfort of KNOWING without a doubt that they were ready and it was the right choice. Keep your heart open and grateful. It won’t hurt any less, but take it a day at a time and you will be okay. :) Death comes for us all. To be loved and to love in return is the greatest gift we can give and be given. :)
2
u/JesNycRoq 6h ago
Iam so sorry you are having to go through this. It is never easy if you know or don’t know when you are going to say goodbye
I am now a cat momma. I wasn’t before.
I use to have a big fat beautiful black lab.
I had her from a puppy to the end of her life. She was my ride or die. We moved from CA to MO together she was my only constant. I had no friends or family in this new place.
When I tell you I’d do anything for her I’m telling the truth. She hurt herself once. And she refused to go up the stairs. I slept with her in the garage so she wasn’t alone with spiders. I spent thousands of dollars to make sure she had the best quality of life.
She started swelling up one day. Instantly to the vet. She had fluid on her rib cage. They drained it and requested that I go to my regular vet. She got X-rays. And it was not good. There was nothing I could do. They gave me options and the risks that came with those options. everything. Nothing was going to allow her to have a good quality of life.
At that point. I was thinking. Was me keeping her around for me or for her. Not in a million years did I think I was saying goodbye to her that day. My best friend. My everything. My reason to work hard so I could give her a better life. Everything. I slept with her collar for a month. I thought I heard her at my home for weeks. I cried non-stop. I lost a huge part of my life.
She is the reason I’m a cat momma now.
And I honestly think when I have to say goodbye to my Mufasa babe I’m not gonna have a single pet. One of each. I love him just as much as her.
They aren’t pets. They are legitimately my family.
It will not be easy. If you proceed with treatment or not. I will tell you……you will day dream a lot. You will cry randomly. You will see something sweet and be reminded. It has been 4 years and I cried for her two days ago.
I ended up cremating her. I bought myself a solid gold urn necklace off Etsy with her name on it. I had someone etch her paw print into gold pendant. And I got a gold rose made . I wear it every single day. To me we still go on adventures.
If you can find something that gives you peace jump in. For me that is my necklace.
You will reminisce. They are not bad. But they will hurt.
2
u/OkWolf601 5h ago
I’m really sorry, this is devastating news. My mom called me about 6 weeks ago to let me know they had to put down our family dog Lily. I moved across the country a few years back, so she FaceTimed me so I could say goodbye. She’ll be waiting for Teddy to greet and play with and love when his time comes.
2
u/Psychological_Warcow 5h ago
I wish I had done paw prints and a nose print at home. That I had kept a small snippet of her fur. I have whiskey since I've tucked them away as I found them but I really wish I'd don't be the others. Her passing was unexpected so there was no time.
What did help was remembering every day with her was a gift and while I was sad I had so my good memories. I think in the end I was just really fucking grateful for the time we had.
1
u/LisaBC65 6h ago
I lost two cats this year…a 17 year old domestic shorthair and a Main Coon who died suddenly at 11. You give him as much love and attention as you can. Watch his breathing..cats can hide pain but can’t hide panting which often means pain. You will know when it is time to take him to the vet…just please be with him so your face is the last thing he sees.
1
u/Academic_Union_1754 6h ago
I’m looking for advice in a few things:
- If you’ve experienced anything similar, what can i expect?
Are you referring to hospice? The doctor will walk you through evaluation guidelines to help with how to gauge his pain. They can hide it but only to a certain extant. If the coughing is only 2x a week you have some time.
- I don’t want him to suffer, and as much as i want him here as long as possible i don’t want him to live in pain. How can i make sure im keeping him comfortable?
The doctor will teach you how to evaluate.
- I’m having so much trouble imagining not having him, if anyone has any suggestions on how to cope please let me know.
Every day or week journal about the fun, kind or good thing you did with Teddy. For example you spent 20 minutes playing with him. He sat in the sun for 10 minutes. Right it down day and time. Sketch him in your journal.
Near the end, see if there is a used cat or dog stroller. If Teddy likes the outdoors see if he would like to sit in the stroller to go outside.
My late cat came to me when she was 14 years old. I was her third owner. Near the end she enjoyed stroller rides and looked out at the world. Her arthritis and thyroid got bad and I made the decision for her. She went in peace but I didn't want her to suffer.
I'm sorry you are losing Teddy. But the loved you have for one another is truly forever. Even as you live your life, grow old too you will still remember him. That's how powerful love is.
1
u/whuskerrz0165 6h ago
I'm going to give you the advice that someone gave me that saved us from a dreadful situation. This person learned it the hard way and had to hopelessly watch her baby die a gasping breath. Schedule the euthanasia now. Cancer moves freaky quick. Scheduling with your vet, especially in home euthanasia can take several days. You may not have that much time.
Please schedule now. You'll never know if you were too early, but being too late is unacceptable. You'll live with it forever.
1
u/Downtown-Tax9089 6h ago
Hello! I am so sorry that you are going through this. I lost my cat in 2025, also named Teddy (who I got when I was 14.) He passed away unexpectedly, so I didn't get the chance to plan his final months. 😢
Despite my baby's passing being unexpected, I was doing some things to keep him comfortable in his older years (more so because he was very old and I doted on him.) I have an ugg blanket that I gave him to keep him warm and comfortable. He loved it and spent a lot of time snuggled up on it.
I also got him nice treats and gave him special things like cooked chicken. Kitty friendly snacks that he loved.
Lots of cuddles and attention. Some cats don't like to snuggle (my boy did.) I would give him his pets and snuggles every day and tell him that I loved him.
In terms of what to expect, I would say to anticipate heartache. Probably for a long time. I'm still hurting over my loss. Do you have any other pets to keep you company?
1
u/angieiwr 6h ago
I know you already are planning to do everything you can for him.
I just want to say that simply by being there for him means he’ll get to be with his beloved human for as long as he’ll remember.
And if his days are numbered, that is probably the greatest thing you could do for him.
Please also remember to be kind to yourself ❤️
Sending you and teddy love from me and biscuit (fat a*s orange girl cat.) 🐈
1
u/NotreallyD 6h ago
He's such a handsome boy! Those eyes. Make as many memories as possible in the time you have left. Also, when it's time for him to leave, hold him as he leaves this world. It's an extremely difficult thing to do but he will pass over knowing he's in loving arms.
1
1
u/RichFoot2073 6h ago
BDE
Best Day Ever
A day full of love, cuddles, treats, and spoiling with tasty food
1
u/Alskasaur 6h ago
If you play games, I would suggest playing Spiritfarer. That game single handedly helped with my grief after losing my brother. Plus it has a cat companion you can hug!
I wish you the best, OP
1
u/optimal_center 6h ago
Make prior final arrangements and pay in advance so you don’t have to think about it during the minutes after you’ve lost him. Having it all taken care of was a huge relief and made those moments less stressful. ❤️🩹
1
u/pyates1 6h ago
Please listen carefully to your vet, they will tell you when it is time. Perhaps subtly but you have to ask clearly for help.
Teddy looks my old friend Dan. He passed a year ago and I'm getting misty typing this. Its going to suck, and suck hard but you can't let your friend suffer.
If you can, do a home euthanasia. Have a creamy tube while he sits in your lap and make that both of your last memory of being together.
In regards to now, maybe take a few days off with him prior. Expect lots of crying and hugs.
4 months ago, we bought a pair of brothers. The breeder called us two days after and the last brother was crying looking for his brothers. Now we have three siamese. We talk to them about Dan and love them madly. They are referred to as the goblins and we have built them a beautiful catio. All the while missing Dan terribly.
Enjoy today, I am so sorry for what you have to endure.
1
1
u/CatsCoffeeCurls 6h ago
I've nursed a fair few cancer cats and the changes are noticeable as things progress. It's rarely an outwardly painful experience for them, but rather you'll have to pay attention to the other signs things aren't going too well: eating less, sleeping more will almost surely be a complaint. You might also find he's spending less time with you and hiding away in unusual places. My Siamese hid in a closet at the end of his life (kidkey disease, anemia).
There's plenty of palliative care options medication wise. Pain management and keeping the appetite going are super important. Palliative chemo can be a good option to explore as well and cats handle it far better than humans. It's unlikely to be curative if the lungs are secondary to an intestinal cancer, but can dramatically improve quality of life as the disease progresses and is well worth starting sooner rather than later.
Take a ton of pictures. Not only important for you, but provides a visual diary of how things are progressing and will help form the last decision. Know what you want after the fact as well. As awful as it is to think about, decide if you're going the burial or cremation route now, choose what you're going to order in terms of a casket/urn if you want him returned, and all those bits. Most vets have connections with crematoriums and probably have pamphlets of your options, but the experience is actually far better if you're near to one and can see him off personally as far as you'd want to be involved.
1
u/Lasvegaslover2 6h ago
I’m so sorry for what you are going through. I think first and foremost, I would make sure that your cat is on some type of pain medication. A lot of people think that when a cat is purring that means they are happy. It can also mean that they are in pain. They are very good at hiding it. That is a survival instinct they are born with.
I did go through the same thing, but my cat was coughing every day. He had asthma, so I just assumed he was in a flareup. Unfortunately I was very wrong. I found out that the cancer had spread from a tumor near his spine, to his lungs and his chest was filled with fluid. The vet said they could drain the fluid from his chest, but it would only come back, and she would not do it if it was her pet. I did not want to put him through anything that would hurt him more, or cause him further stress. My vet offered to euthanize him that day, but I said I wanted to have someone come to my home to do it. I just wasn’t prepared to leave that office with an empty carrier. I just felt so lost and alone.
It was really hard to accept that he was dying, because he was acting totally normal even on the day that they came to euthanize him. I’m not sure if you’ve ever heard this before but they say “better a day too early than a day too late.” I know you don’t want your cat to suffer, so I would have to say the sooner the better. It’s going to be the hardest thing you’ve ever done, and there is no way to prepare yourself for it.
But for now, I would say make sure that you get lots of pictures and videos and take a clipping of his fur along with his paw prints. I lost my sweet boy Noah (18 y.o.) on 12/8/24, and I’m still trying to come to terms with his death. I can only speak from my own experience, but I have the most trouble with guilt, because I made the choice to end his life. I didn’t want to play God, but in the end I had to. I was so afraid it would turn into an emergency situation where I was rushing him to the hospital, and he was fighting for his air. I could’ve never handled that. Grief is a funny thing and you will go through many stages. Just be very gentle on yourself and surround yourself with people who understand your pain. I’m sending you love and prayers! 💕🙏
1
u/Embarrassed_Ad_1287 6h ago
Spend as much time as you can with him, do the things that make him happy, and help him get up if he needs. Just be there for comfort and support. Give lots of pets, hugs, and cuddles
1
u/anotherbob67 6h ago
Just lost the second of my two boys in 10 months One over the course of a long decline and one unexpectedly yesterday.
I made a quality of life list. Is he in pain, can he care for himself when I’m at work and so on. I can’t tell you what include. Taking my time to organize my thoughts on what to do when was a tremendous help with being confident I was making the right choices while also very emotional and vulnerable. When the time came for them both there was no second guessing, nothing frantic, very sad, difficult but sure. You’ll see the light go out and just know.
All the money, hope and prayer in the world can’t beat time. Remind yourself nothing is immortal including yourself. Set a limit on medical intervention and weigh your cat’s quality of life along with your own.
1
u/Purple-Break131 5h ago
spend as much time as you can! Takes lots of videos- videos so small things that make them them. Like them sitting in their fav spot, playing with a toy they like, purring, grooming themselves, etc. Anything that is unique to their personality.. Trust me those videos you will cherish.
Try to do a photoshoot with them. I always had lots of pictures of him but never me with him.
Take their paw prints, fur etc. Tell them all the things that you will miss about them. Tell them they are loved and will be missed
1
u/SpiritualWrongdoer 5h ago
I had to say bye to my Sadie bug this June. Just like you and Teddy, she came home to me right around my 13th birthday! We had 20 years together and I treasured every day with her.
I’m not going to lie to you, the next few weeks/months are going awful. Hell, even talking about it now still has me tearing up. But she had rapidly gone into liver failure, and while treatment was possible, her quality of life would have suffered tremendously if she even pulled through.
Despite the pain and tears, I’d make the same decision to euthanize her. As pet owners, we have a duty as caretakers to make the best decisions for their health. They can’t advocate for themselves, after all. It’s the hardest decision we have to make regarding our pets, but their quality of life comes first.
From the comments, I know you’re in the right mindset for it, so I just want to say that I’m so terribly sorry that this is happening. If you need someone to talk to my messages are always open!
We cremated our girly cat and had necklaces made with the imprint of her nose so she’s always with us, though I think if I could do thinks a bit differently I would have paid to taxidermy her coat and had her bones cleaned and articulated so we’d still have her in the house. Take the time to spoil your boy! Give him lots of love for me and for you and appreciate every moment you have left with him. They’re gone far too quick.
1
u/UnholyShroud696 5h ago
Teddy as a kitten wins the internet today. SUCH A CUTE, PRECIOUS BOY!
Very sorry to hear that he is unwell. I hope you continue to cherish your time with him.
1
1
u/eyepatchplease 4h ago
Sorry to hear you’re going through this. My cat passed away unexpectedly two years ago and there are just a few things I would have done, had I known it was her last few weeks/months.
Be in the now. Experience what it’s like to be with him, to hold him, to pet him, to feel his fur. His sounds and characteristics. Not suggesting not recording, but just be present and allow those things to be “saved” in your memory.
Give him the best time you can and as you can. As a lot of people have suggested, take this time to celebrate. Do what you can. Know that it may not be perfect and be forgiving to yourself for that. Be in the now applies to this part too: what you can do for him, and yourself, will be unique and enough. Just remain present.
Have a plan re burial/cremation/etc. When my girlfriend’s cat passed away this year, I immediately offered to have him cremated. She lives in an apartment and burial wasn’t an option really. I know she’s happy to have him home but she’s also mentioned since how she wishes she could have preserved him. There are taxidermy services for pets and we wish we had thought of this before. (Obviously not everyone wants that, but it’s just another example and highlights the need to consider everything while you have time.)
1
u/Covered-n-Mud2 4h ago
It mostly depends on the tumor type. Our 17-year-old cat was diagnosed with a myxosarcoma on his chest wall two years ago that grew slowly and started effecting his gait, but never got big enough to inhibit him from normal activities. In the course of managing and observing that tumor, he was diagnosed with lymphoma in his large intestine (probably a progression that sometimes occurs with IBD). We had to change him to a restricted ingredient diet to help his digestion, but again, he had it for almost a year and it never grew big enough to inhibit his regular play and energy level. Six months ago, he had a tiny little bump on his lip that turned out to be a sarcoma. The grew quickly and ultimately inhibited his ability to eat, and we had to make the call to let him go once he could no longer eat comfortably. But he was still jumping around and playing with our other cats, and wasn't otherwise isolating himself or showing signs of slowing down. It was devastating to let him go, when he was still active. The oncologist we worked with said pretty much the same thing your's did. Different forms of chemo were discussed, but ultimately it was better for him to enjoy as much of his life as he had left, and stay vigilant for his symptoms progressing.
That's the best advice I can give- don't rush euthanasia, stay attentive to how he's experiencing life day to day, and interact with him while he's enjoying life as much as possible.
1
u/davewritescode 3h ago
I went through this a few weeks ago with a cat that was my best friend for 17 years from aggressive cancer that we didn’t find until it was too late. I don’t have any great answers other than to tell you that you’ll know when your cat has reached the end and that the best gift we can give our pets is the gift of allowing them to pass without suffering even though it hurts us deeply.
We made sure to make my little buddies last week with us as special as we could. He ate salmon tuna and bacon every day. The morning he died I knew it was time and as sad as it was I stayed with him until he passed.
It’s been a few weeks now, we’ve even adopted new cats and last night I picked a picture for his ashes and cried my eyes out because I miss him so much, even still.
I’ve lost pets before but there was something special about that cat that I feel I won’t ever get over.
1
u/davewritescode 3h ago
I want to echo that adopting another pet was very helpful in getting over the grief. I felt extremely guilty at first but having another animal to take care of and worry about was extremely helpful.
1
u/AdelleVDL 3h ago
Also went through it. Just pay attention to how much pain vs joy he experiences, so you can mark the point where it is not good anymore to keep him around. And hug him a lot. Last months when I cared for my boy, I did let him rest a lot, so he has strenght to fight the cancer, because I was still hoping it can get better, but I missed on lot of snuggles like that and regretted it so much, even when I did all I could have. It is like, when you are doing the paliative care for months, years, no day eventually feels like the last one, you get used to it, so when it got worse, I just thought it was a bad day, but it wasnt, it was over.. I missed it, cause our normal was so different at that time.. So ton of kisses, ton of snuggles, treats, speak to him with love, enjoy it all. When cancer gets bad, it gets bad fast... and you dont wanna get to that point. I always recommend consulting trustworthy vet and ask them about their honest opnion, for when you should do it.. usually they see ill animals all the time, so they really have good sense for how the kitty feels and how much time they have..
1
u/McSwearWolf 52m ago
First of all, so sorry. Having a few tears for you myself; this part isn’t easy. But we are being the best guardians for our beloved cats by doing exactly what you’re doing - you sought out great medical care, you received a diagnosis, you are processing that while continuing to closely monitor and tend to your sweet Teddy while also somehow looking after your mother, your dying grandmother… that’s all pretty heavy stuff. Give yourself grace, you’re doing an awesome job, even being on a forum like this seeking general advice, asking about other cat owners and their experiences with this, etc. - bravo. But I know it is grueling. I see you.
As for Teddy, I’m actually going to copy someone else’s advice that I read just a few days ago and it was spot on: when the bad days start to outnumber the good days, you will know that his time is getting close.
For now, of course, work with your vet, as you’re doing, you can set up a plan for palliative care to make sure that he isn’t in too much pain.
With my senior cat, we knew it was time when she was no longer eating daily, she wasn’t making it to her litter box more thsn 50% of the time, she had less interest in everything, she seemed confused or slept more than 90% of the time (cats do sleep a lot, but even for her it was much more) … what else… oh, and she was having some episodes of vomiting, we already knew she had endocrine issues so she had an infection and we were continuously having to treat it, she couldn’t fight it off.
I guess the last factor was that this was a cat that couldn’t be medicated easily. You’ve never seen a cat that can find pills like this cat, my goodness. She was SMART. She did not play haha. Shots/ needles were also out. She was the sweetest cat, but you were not going to cross her with a sharp object like that; I once saw her bite a big snake’s head clear off when she snuck out and went into our backyard in FL.
Anyway, I’ve said too much. I apologize that got long but I guess what I’m trying to say is I knew her quality of life was not going to be good even if we could buy her a couple more weeks with more medication. The bad days were well outnumbering the good days so we knew, and we had to say “see you in the great beyond.” 🤍
I’ll be thinking of you and Teddy.
He’s soooo gorgeous btw.
(Be brave, little king, you are so loved👑)
0
43
u/l1v1ngst0n 7h ago
The inaight that helped me most is that while he was with you only a short time from your perspective, you were with him for all of his time. An ever present light in his life.
As for what to expect, I can't sugarcoat it. It's brutal and horrendous. For me at least, it doesn't get much better over time, but you just bear it, and try to focus on the beautiful time you spent together rather than the end.
The last piece of advice I would give is that it's infinitely better to make the call a little too early than too late.
All my best to you and Teddy, and thank you for taking good care of him for all of these years.