If you love Jesus/your pastor and you donāt want to stress your mind today, just skip this post. Letās go.
Not all men of God are narcissists.
But positions of power and influence in various areas tend to attract people of a narcissistic disposition.
I met one prominent pastor-musician during some church fundraising ceremony he had organized, and it was evident that the guy was there on business while people were busy falling about all over him in Jesusās name.
You just gotta respect the hustle, man.
I grew up around narcissistic people and Iāve studied them since childhood.
When youāve interacted with as many narcissists as I have, and if you have ever confronted a narcissist, you start to identify their manipulation tactics pretty easily.
So this Gashumba guy went out and challenged pastors who claim to heal diseases like cancer and AIDS, to take the healing to hospitals, much like modern-day Jesus might have done, in order to demonstrate Godās power to the people and erase all doubt.
This video is an excerpt from Pr Kayanjaās response.
Manipulation comes naturally to narcissists, which is why they can easily influence masses of people to believe and do anything they say.
Look at our politics for example. Look within your families. You can tell who is a narcissist, and having an audience or position of influence really increases their power and sense of superiority.
The most straightforward way to identify a narcissist is by watching how they respond to confrontation. Narcissists are ultimately afraid of being exposed or seen as less than they portray themselves to be.
When someone challenges or even merely questions their authority or legitimacy, they see it as an attack or an attempt to expose them and they start to scramble about, trying to restore their āimageā through various manipulation tactics and even threats.
Thereās this one technique narcissists like to use called DARVO - Deny the existence of the problem or Deflect attention from the issue at hand, Attack the character of the person who has confronted them, and Reverse Victim and Offender ie turn themselves into the victim to gain sympathy from anyone who can listen.
And obviously, pastors already have a ready audience and platform which gives them a safe space to influence the minds of unsuspecting people.
So letās watch this video together and break it down. This is just a case study, so feel free to let us know if it was taken out of context.
Deny/Deflect:
At no point during this video does our pastor address the actual issue at hand.
Some guy is here challenging pastors who claim to heal serious illnesses to go do it in hospitals so that people can believe and come to their churches.
Despite not having been targeted outright by the statement, the pastor has chosen to take this as an attack on his business ministry and has instead framed the topic as a warning against āyoung people attacking eldersā, using āyoung peopleā as the easiest scapegoat in this situation.
He mentions that itās not even in African culture for young people to āmockā and āridicule eldersā. He even mentions the Ugandan constitution to emphasize the gravity of the matter.
In all these many words, he still does not address the actual statement, why he is offended by it, or what might be the thought process/ motivations behind it.
It would be easier for him to say āGod is working through me, I have nothing to prove.ā
Or even not to say anything at all, since heās innocent and apparently not concerned with Gashumbaās claims.
But the pastor canāt allow his sheep to feel safe having any small doubt about his seniority, so he frames it as the āspirit of mocking in Ugandaā and condemns it ASAP.
Attack:
The pastor goes ahead to attack Gashumbaās character, claiming him to be a liar who attacks everybody including the Katikkiro, the president, and even the Catholic Church.
Yet again, a lot of words unrelated to the actual topic at hand. He has successfully distracted his followers.
Since he already has the sympathy of the church in his defamation sexual assault case, he sacrifices it and brings it up here, but still framing Gashumba as the main offender behind the case and glazing over the actual incident.
Suddenly Gashumba is a horrible man. He abuses people and calls them foolish and stupid, so he is positioned as having no credibility. Gashumba is now a liar and a horrible person who tried to frame our pastor for a horrible thing. The actual victims or details of the case are not addressed. It is merely a distraction. Are you following?
Reverse Victim and Offender:
When someone says āenough is enough, you have crossed the lineā, you instantly imagine that this person has undergone so much injustice and they are now ready to stand up for themselves. It is a statement that immediately evokes sympathy.
Kayanja has already listed a number of fellow āvictimsā of Gashumbaās evil mouth, as proof that he is a bad man who should not be emulated by Kayanjaās good followers of Christ.
He launches into a recollection of some bomb incident that happened at his church, and equates Gashumbaās statements to an actual bomb threat. He implies that Gashumba is no different from the terrorist as he has also threatened to bring āa bombā to the church to āfinish themā, and resorts to threatening him with the same ābombā to āfinish himā instead.
Meanwhile Iām pretty sure there are people who say much worse things about pastors and the church, but Gashumba poses a bigger threat, having the platform and influence that he has.
Bonus tactic - Extremist language
If you listen carefully, you will find that narcissists when confronted tend to use extremist language to make a point and stir peopleās emotions.
āWaging war against the churchā
āDestroying peopleā
āAttacking eldersā
āEnemies of the churchā
āBewareā
āTerroristā
āFinish himā
This is not to derail Christians or their beliefs, or to say that Kayanja is a narcissist/fake pastor or Gashumba is totally innocent, or whatever whosoever said was right or wrong.
This is intended to identify the ways in which narcissists hide behind positions of power and influence, and also the ways they react to confrontation/being exposed. Fortunately or unfortunately, this video demonstrates a typical narcissistās reaction accurately.
Go home and listen to your leaders. Think about the interactions youāve had with family members/friends. See if you can identify anyone with these characters from the signs we have discussed above. (100 marks)
And it is possible that you yourself might be the narcissist so donāt just go pointing fingers. They love to do that too.
Anyway donāt come at me but I feel like anyone whose entire career and wealth is built on āspreading the word of Godā is an automatic red flag. Otherwise everyone is welcome to believe what they want.
Thoughts?