r/whatdoIdo • u/SilanIDK03 • 5h ago
Urgent help
I am genuinely so fucked right now, like talking deep deep fucked. I 23f recently got out of 2 years in mental health treatment. I finally was able to get an apartment with the help of a lovely person I found on Facebook. I am a full-time student since March, and will be graduating with my b.s. psychology by the end of the year. I have had some unexpected expenses come up, and money got taken out of my account before rent could take it. Now, I have no way to get to my job that finally starts tomorrow, and is 2.5 hours away on the bus. on top of that, this job that I got was a last resort, and my body will not physically be able to handle it due to health problems. (warehouse at amazon) I got a dream job, but they require me to have a car, and im afraid they won't hold the position for me until I can figure out how to get approved on a car. (Part of my mental health is that I was manic before I was stabilized in treatment, and messed up my credit in my earlier adult years.)
I'm pre-approved for a loan, but i have no cosigner.
The only saving grace I had was a Wednesday art market I do every week. my business partner and best friend has been nowhere to be seen today or yesterday, and he has all of my art stuff in his car, almost an hour drive away from me.
I have no idea what to do and am totally freaking out because I have nowhere to go if I get kicked out of my apartment, and get relatively no support from family. please help in anyway.
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u/TryWrong7379 5h ago
Don’t start a job that is going to strip away all the progress you have made in the last 2 years.
Physically I wouldn’t be able to do this. I am in a similar situation. I just finished the education program of a new trade. I had to do 120 full time hours and I was in the same situation with travel. The job and the commute actually ended up costing my physical health and I am on week 4 of treatment to just try and get back to healthy.
I would speak to your rental lady and tell her about the situation. It’s best to up front about it. Pay as much rent as possible. Get your art supplies back. You have to work on a way to work and do your art on your own. I personally carry a backpack every day I go out. Just so I can be self contained.
Make lists and assess daily your needs and how to get a job you can do. I have the help of an amazing job coach through my country’s government system. I just cannot see how you will be able to do the job itself (physically demanding, I’ve heard some crazy stories about the job role you want to embark on. And with the commute I think you have a high chance of burnout.
I’m sorry life is so hard, but I always listen to a song by the White Stripes called Little Acorns to stabilize myself.
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u/Unlucky-Mind7298 2h ago
I don't understand why you would undertake a program to get a job you're not able to perform. Is it a surprise that you can't actually do it, or did you know that all along but just kept going anyway?
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u/Kalahikiola88 2h ago
Exactly! And my question is how the hell were they paying for college and come up with a deposit to even get the Apt??
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u/Enough_Pepper8880 5h ago
You got a job that’s a 3 hour bus ride one way?
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u/SilanIDK03 5h ago
its the only job I could get, I was applying 5x or more everyday for 3 months
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u/SilanIDK03 5h ago
also its a 30-40 minute car ride
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u/Unlucky-Mind7298 2h ago
Does that matter, if you don't have a car and no way to get one?
I get how mania can fuck up your credit. It's awful. That's where you are, though. You need to be calm and realistic about what you can achieve regarding work.
Use all the resources the poster above kindly laid out for you. I'm sure someone can help you out in some way. Hang in there.
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u/Jacobysmadre 4h ago
My adult son was in the same boat with the job. He had to take the bus three hours each way.
Are there any type of customer service jobs that might be closer? You probably wouldn’t need a car.
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u/SilanIDK03 4h ago
I have applied to everything, the housing market is garbage right now
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u/Unlucky-Mind7298 2h ago
A job isn't a housing issue.
If you accepted a job you can't get to or can't do, you need to accept you don't have a job and inform the employer. Otherwise, get on the bus and go to work.
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u/Kalahikiola88 2h ago
FACTS!!! People do it everyday and I had to do it an entire year before 3 hrs each way until I found another job closer… this generation is so soft ….
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u/Unlucky-Mind7298 2h ago
So do you plan to perform the job duties or not?
It sounds to me like you're still very scattered and overwhelmed. Have you discontinued your meds?
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u/Enough_Pepper8880 5h ago
Kinda putting all your eggs in one basket huh
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u/eleventh_house 5h ago
You start work tomorrow and don't have transportation? Unless you have a friend or acquaintance who can spot you a ride with the short notice, you may have to cut your losses with the job.
Looking ahead, depending on where you live, there might be ride assistance programs, which will probably take time to arrange.
Also depending where you live, your property owner may not legally be able to be kick you out of your apartment, so get your hands on the local renter laws.
I know this sucks and may feel like a life or death situation, but it sounds like you need some more time to get your life in order, and you should research some local (town/city/state/province/country) resources and systems available for these types of situations.
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u/rpaul9578 5h ago
If you can tell me what city, I can help you do deep research on resources you may not have considered yet. I'm happy to help.
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u/SilanIDK03 5h ago
san diego, CA
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u/rpaul9578 4h ago
SAN DIEGO RESOURCES: PART 1 OF 2 Emergency rent assistance, eviction prevention, and housing
I researched resources for your situation, and there's something important you should know: at 23, you qualify for the age range of several San Diego programs specifically designed to help young adults at risk of homelessness.
The priority should be keeping your apartment, not moving into a shelter. These are the organizations I would contact immediately.
SAN DIEGO HOUSING COMMISSION: HOUSING INSTABILITY PREVENTION PROGRAM (HIPP)
619-578-7768
This is probably your strongest lead. HIPP helps lower-income City of San Diego residents who are facing a housing crisis and possible homelessness.
The program provides qualifying households with $250, $500, $750, or $1,000 per month toward rent, potentially for up to 24 months.
Importantly, its priority populations include young adults ages 18–24 and people with disabilities. You're 23, so you already fit one priority category. Your documented mental or physical health limitations might qualify you for another.
Tell them: "I'm 23 and at immediate risk of homelessness because I can't cover my rent. I'm a full-time student starting employment, I have very limited support, and I have documented health limitations. I need a HIPP screening and help with rental arrears."
This particular program serves the City of San Diego. If you live in another city within the county, ask which housing-prevention program serves your address.
https://sdhc.org/homelessness-solutions/hipp/
LEGAL AID SOCIETY OF SAN DIEGO: EVICTION PREVENTION
1-877-534-2524
Monday through Friday, 9 a.m.–5 p.m.
Legal Aid operates the City of San Diego's Eviction Prevention Program. It assists qualifying low-income renters with eviction notices, negotiations, legal advice, and representation.
Missing a rent payment does not mean your landlord can immediately remove you. California generally requires written notice and a court process. For unpaid rent, a 3-day Notice to Pay Rent or Quit is common, with weekends and court holidays excluded from that three-day period.
If you're served with actual eviction lawsuit papers, contact Legal Aid immediately. The deadline to respond can be as short as 10 court days.
https://www.lassd.org/resource/san_diego_epp/
https://selfhelp.courts.ca.gov/eviction-tenant/notice-types
YMCA YOUTH HOUSING & SUPPORT
760-908-9647
This may be your next-best resource after HIPP.
The YMCA helps young adults 18–25 throughout San Diego County with housing navigation, case management, emergency housing, and possible rental assistance.
Its Housing Our Youth program serves people ages 16–24 who are at risk of homelessness or already experiencing it.
That means you should contact them before losing your apartment.
Ask directly about Housing Our Youth, emergency rental assistance, housing stabilization, transportation assistance, and help staying employed.
https://www.ymcasd.org/community-support/housing
The YMCA also has drop-in centers for ages 14–25 that provide basic-needs and transportation support.
Escondido: 760-908-9373, 150 La Terraza Blvd., Monday–Friday, 1–5 p.m.
Oceanside: 760-908-9647, 215 Barnes St., Monday, Wednesday, Friday, 1–5 p.m.
https://www.ymcasd.org/community-support/housing/drop-in-centers/
URBAN STREET ANGELS: HARBORTAY
619-415-6616
Urban Street Angels opened HarborTAY in July 2026. It provides transitional housing for young adults 18–24 experiencing homelessness.
The converted motel includes rooms with private bathrooms and kitchenettes, plus meals, case management, employment support, and other services.
This is a backup, not a reason to give up your apartment. Call now and ask whether they can start an intake or tell you what to do if you become homeless.
https://urbanstreetangels.org/harbortay/
https://urbanstreetangels.org/applicant-form/
SAFE STAY WELLNESS CENTER
Safe STAY is another emergency backup for unhoused young adults 18–24 in the City of San Diego. It offers up to 43 beds, meals, showers, laundry, case management, and help finding longer-term housing.
It's operated by the San Diego LGBT Community Center in an LGBTQ-affirming environment.
https://thecentersd.org/housing-services/
SBCS YOUNG-ADULT HOUSING
619-420-3620
SBCS offers supportive transitional housing for eligible young adults 18–25, particularly those experiencing homelessness or transitioning out of foster care.
It may become relevant if the other housing options fail.
https://sbcssandiego.org/emergency-shelter-transitional-housing/
WHAT I WOULD DO FIRST
Call HIPP, Legal Aid, and YMCA Youth Housing as soon as their offices open. Ask for an actual eligibility screening or case-management intake, not simply another list of phone numbers.
Then contact your landlord in writing:
"I had an unexpected financial emergency that interfered with my rent payment. I'm beginning employment and actively pursuing rental assistance through San Diego housing and eviction-prevention programs. Please confirm the exact amount outstanding and let me know whether we can arrange a short payment plan while my applications are being reviewed."
Save all landlord messages, rent notices, and payment records.
None of these programs guarantees immediate funding or an opening, but there are real programs serving your exact age group, and you do not have to wait until you're sleeping outside to ask for help.
Transportation, college emergency money, benefits, and employment resources are in Part 2.
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u/rpaul9578 4h ago
SAN DIEGO RESOURCES: PART 2 OF 2 Transportation, student emergency funding, employment, and benefits
Continuing the San Diego resources for your housing and employment crisis, I found several programs that might help you get to work, reduce your expenses, and access emergency money through your college.
PRONTO LIFE: REDUCED PUBLIC TRANSIT FARES
San Diego launched PRONTO LIFE on October 1, 2026.
If you're enrolled in Medi-Cal, CalFresh, or CalWORKs, you may qualify for discounted MTS/NCTD transit fares.
The approved rates are $2.50 one way, a $6 daily cap, and a $72 monthly cap/pass on covered services.
If you already receive Medi-Cal, check your eligibility now rather than waiting to apply for CalFresh.
https://www.sdmts.com/fares/pronto-life-program
DISCOUNTED COLLEGE TRANSIT PASSES
MTS offers discounted monthly and semester passes through participating colleges.
For Fall 2026, some participating schools are selling semester passes through October 19. Many also offer $68 monthly college passes during October–December.
Ask your school's transportation or student-services office whether you qualify.
https://www.sdmts.com/fares/pass-programs/college-passes
YMCA TRANSPORTATION ASSISTANCE
760-908-9647
The YMCA's young-adult programs explicitly include transportation and basic-needs support.
Ask: "I have employment starting, but I have no money to get to my first shifts. Do you have an emergency PRONTO pass, transportation fund, or other employment assistance?"
https://www.ymcasd.org/community-support/housing/drop-in-centers/
SAN DIEGO WORKFORCE PARTNERSHIP
619-319-9675
Some Workforce Partnership programs provide transportation support, work supplies, job-placement assistance, and other services for qualifying participants.
Ask specifically about young-adult employment programs, WIOA supportive services, transportation assistance, and jobs closer to home.
https://workforce.org/our-programs/tay-works/
YOUR COLLEGE MAY HAVE EMERGENCY MONEY
Contact your school's Basic Needs office, Dean of Students/Student Affairs, and Financial Aid office immediately.
Ask about emergency grants, rental assistance, emergency housing, transportation funding, short-term financial assistance, and food support.
California State University campuses have emergency funding and basic-needs resources, including at San Diego State. California community colleges have dedicated Basic Needs Centers. UC campuses also maintain basic-needs support systems.
The exact assistance depends on which school you attend and available funds.
Tell them:
"I'm a full-time student expecting to graduate this year. An unexpected financial emergency has put me at immediate risk of losing my apartment, and I have no transportation to a new job. I need an urgent Basic Needs appointment and information about emergency grants, rental assistance, housing, and transportation support."
ALSO ASK FINANCIAL AID FOR A SPECIAL-CIRCUMSTANCES REVIEW.
Federal Student Aid allows schools to review significant changes in financial circumstances. An adjustment is not guaranteed, but it may help with your overall living-cost and aid situation.
https://studentaid.gov/articles/financial-aid-not-enough/
CALFRESH: FOOD ASSISTANCE
1-866-262-9881
You may qualify for CalFresh even as a college student, although student-specific eligibility rules apply.
San Diego County says applicants qualifying for expedited service may receive food benefits in as few as three days.
That won't directly pay rent, but it could free up money you'd otherwise spend on groceries.
Apply at https://benefitscal.com/
County information: https://www.sandiegocounty.gov/service/get-calfresh-food-stamps/
GENERAL RELIEF: TEMPORARY CASH ASSISTANCE
1-866-262-9881
San Diego County provides temporary cash assistance to eligible residents who have no other means of support.
General Relief is generally repayable, and processing can take up to 30 days, so it isn't tomorrow's transportation solution. But it is worth asking about if you have essentially no cash.
https://www.sandiegocounty.gov/content/sdc/hhsa/programs/ssp/general_relief.html
ABOUT THE DREAM JOB AND THE CAR
Before accepting a potentially expensive bad-credit auto loan, call the employer.
Ask:
"I'm very interested in accepting this position. I'm arranging transportation now. Is owning a personal vehicle required immediately, or is reliable transportation the actual requirement? Is there flexibility on the start date or initial training while I resolve this?"
Those are two different requirements, and it's worth clarifying before taking on debt.
If you do pursue the loan, get the APR, monthly payment, full loan term, down payment, insurance costs, and cosigner requirements in writing.
A car loan taken while you're already struggling to pay rent could create a much larger financial problem.
ABOUT THE AMAZON JOB AND YOUR HEALTH
You don't need to force yourself through a physically unsuitable job indefinitely just because it's available.
Ask about any reasonable workplace accommodations you need, and reconnect with your previous treatment provider or case manager for documentation and additional support.
You also don't need to disclose your entire mental-health history to a prospective employer when asking about transportation or scheduling.
MENTAL HEALTH SUPPORT
San Diego County's Access and Crisis Line is available 24/7 at 1-888-724-7240.
You can also call or text 988 for emotional distress or a mental-health crisis. These aren't only for suicidal emergencies.
https://www.sandiegocounty.gov/content/sdc/bhs/ACL.html
ABOUT YOUR MISSING ART SUPPLIES
Send your business partner a calm written request to return your inventory and equipment, with a specific time and place.
Keep screenshots, receipts, photos, and messages establishing ownership.
For now, don't count Wednesday's market income toward rent until you have your supplies back.
YOUR IMMEDIATE PRIORITIES
Protect the apartment first through HIPP (619-578-7768) and Legal Aid (1-877-534-2524).
Contact YMCA Youth Housing (760-908-9647) for housing stabilization and transportation support.
Contact your college's Basic Needs and Financial Aid offices for emergency funding.
Contact Workforce Partnership (619-319-9675) for transportation and employment help.
Apply for CalFresh and possibly General Relief (1-866-262-9881).
And ask the dream employer about flexibility before committing to an expensive car loan.
The most important thing is that you're 23, and San Diego has multiple programs specifically intended for young adults your age. Your situation is urgent, but a missed rent payment does not mean you're already evicted. There is still an opportunity to protect your housing while you work through the employment and transportation problems.
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u/Jacobysmadre 4h ago
Damn! We are in EC and he got a job at the airport. 3hrs each way. Yep I hear you.
Tons of jobs here friend! Keep trying! 7/11s, malls (anything on trolley line) anything down University, or El Cajon, or Adams.
Downtown at any of the hotels or
In MV1
u/KeyTuner 3h ago
Im in San Diego. Im about 30 minutes from my job. Where are you in San Diego and where do you work?
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u/SilanIDK03 5h ago
TLDR Basically, 500$ short on rent, so they are trying to kick me out. start job tomorrow, so no money for at least 2 weeks. 2.5 hour bus ride 1 way, 10 hour long shift. have other job offer that's better, but they require a car. side hustle didn't work out
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u/rpaul9578 5h ago
They would have to put you through an actual eviction process and that can take months.
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u/Kalahikiola88 2h ago
What world you live in? In 2026 evictions take weeks 3-4 toos
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u/rpaul9578 1h ago
If you don't rrespond to the eviction lawsuit it can take 4–8 weeks. If you respond and requests a trial 6–12 weeks. If you contest the case or there are delays 3–6 months or longer.
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u/Kalahikiola88 1h ago
You trippin! 🤣if you DONT respond you’ll he in the street with a quickness! If you dont pay your rent before that next month roles around its a wrap! If you DO respond you can buy yourself time of 3-4 weeks. LAWS HAVE CHANGED…You shit will he on the street faster than you can blink. They’re letting people stay in apartments and owe two months rent…The courts favor the owners nowadays.
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u/StrikingMixture8172 5h ago
Can you rent a Turo or something to get to the dream job?
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u/Unlucky-Mind7298 2h ago
Is the dream job available? It sounds like OP is struggling to get to work at Amazon, which is a 3-hr bus one way.
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u/Kalahikiola88 2h ago
In all honestly if yiu want that job you’ll be riding the bus 2 hrs everyday until you catch up in you bills. I did it for entire YEAR and it was 3hrs each way… AND how were you paying for college AND how did you come up with a deposit to get your apartment??? Nobody gives you anything fir free especially an apartment. Soooo that said if you dont want to be homeless my suggestion is pull your boots up strap them on tight and ride the bus💯
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u/Immediate-Let-826 2h ago
Get the audio book resilience by Eric grietens and do wtv u gotta do. I was in similar situation that book changed my life.
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u/Kalahikiola88 2h ago
I think my comment got deleted? So here again….Ride the bus keep a roof over your head until something changes you have no choice…it wont be easy but you CAN do it its not impossible. I rode the bus 3 hrs each way to work until I found another job. If you want to survive bad enough you’ll do it and how are you paying for college? And how did you pay for a deposit on the APT ??? There is some missing parts to this story😐
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u/Mors-Official 5h ago
Stop panicking and start triaging because fear is a luxury you cannot afford right now. Call the Amazon hiring manager immediately and explain your transportation issue honestly while asking if they can hold the position for one week or if there are any local warehouse roles that do not require a car. Do not lie about your health but do emphasize your willingness to work and your recent stability since treatment ended. Contact the art market organizer or your business partner again and demand your materials back because those supplies are your actual lifeline to income that does not break your body. If he refuses tell him you will file a police report for theft of property because desperation requires clarity not kindness.
Reach out to local community action agencies or United Way by dialing 211 to ask for emergency rental assistance and transportation vouchers since you have a job offer which makes you a priority candidate for aid. Contact your former mental health provider or case manager to see if they have resources for crisis stabilization since losing housing would trigger a relapse. You are not fucked you are in a tight spot that requires aggressive self-advocacy and resourcefulness. Stop waiting for rescue and start making calls because every minute you spend freezing is a minute closer to losing ground you have already fought hard to gain.