My tinnitus was caused by microsuction in my left ear over 5 months ago. Due to this I developed 4 horrible tones and hyperacusis. It's an insidious procedure that should be banned. But right now I desperately need help managing 2 of these tones.
I have 2 stable ringings that I know I can habituate to, as I've been tracking their individual TFI (Tinnitus Functional Index) over time and these have gone down.
It's the unstable tones that are destroying me, especially because they change their frequency and tones throughout the day:
- Left ear: sparkling tinnitus at over 15 dB and at about 12khz and reacts to the environment in real time. F.e if I go outside where it's louder, it increases its volume and if I put on my hearing protection, it goes back down to its 15 dB.
- Right ear: very high-pitched reactive whooshes at around 13 khz - 15 khz and at over 15 dB. Sometimes it goes over to my left ear, but it's mainly in my right.
The tones mentioned are what cause my TFI score to be 96/100 and stay there. I'm so sorry if anyone has extremely loud T that's over 80 dB. Our reaction is also what makes it catastrophic. These tones are so unnatural and make me feel completely broken. I've always had issues with sensory gating and sensory overload.
A reference to what these tones sound like is this video from Treble Health that's called:
Tinnitus SILK - High Range Noise Masking for Relief: https://youtu.be/DJscKr4RV_4?t=11354
I have never been in such a situation: acoustic shock or trauma caused by a doctor/ENT and now I've been practically thrown away to rot while the perpetrator gets to live their life and I get seen as crazy. How could someone do this to another human?
It hurts so much because I see myself deteriorating in real time and I'm already sure I've developed some kind of mental illness due to tinnitus. It literally feels like I'll never get out of fight-or-flight mode. I've fallen into the abyss. My chest burns, I feel extremely weak and my heart physically burns. I've never hyperventilated before. I don't even know who I am anymore. I do nothing but cry all day and think of only one way out but I want to be strong for the ones I love, but I wish they could truly understand that I'm going through permanent pain every single second of my life. But I'm also completely terrified of nonexistence so I'm completely stuck.
I've been left homebound, mentally ill and to rot at the age of 25. I used to be so happy and so amazed at life: the fact that I was actually conscious in the universe, self aware, that I could move and enjoy almost anything; especially the little things. I don't do anything now, because I can't.
If you have catastrophic T, please help me. Anything helps. Even knowing that someone else has the same type of tones will help. Any tips, how long it took you to get used to them? Anything.
I use sound masking all day until I hit sensory overload. But it seems that masking is impossible.
It feels like I'm on my knees begging, I wouldn't even care about going through invasive brain surgery at this point if I knew it could at least quiet or silence the tones (which I already know doesn't exist atm).