I'm on day 6 without alcohol (huzzah!), and while I am motivated to heal my body and reach my dreams, I can't help but feel like I'm paying off a mountain of debt to my body. This mountain feels hard to climb sometimes.
I drank hard in college, got a little better, life happened, and I got worse again. I've had it on again and off again until a major wake-up call from my wife last February. Since then, I've changed my relationship with alcohol. I'm able to have some without flying off the handle and losing control, and I know I am lucky for that. However, after I drink, it keeps trying to pull me back or be a consistent presence in my life. When things get hard, the easy thing is to bury my feelings; the hard thing is to sit with and address my feelings. I've also gotten much better at this.
I want to be fit and look fit. I'm pretty strong, but I don't have a ton of definition, which is the main thing I'd like to accomplish. Body recomposition 101. Working out isn't a problem, eating right has also not been an issue, but staying away from alcohol consistently has been.
I planned for this break. It was my birthday; I had fun, I went to a music festival, and had my last drinks for a while on Thursday, so now I'm at day 6.
When you were at the beginning of your sobriety, or even right now, where you are: how do you stay positive knowing you have a long way to go?
I know it's about consistency, focusing on one day at a time, but I can't help but feel disappointed that I let my body down so much. I already feel amazing, and I want to keep going, but sometimes I feel like I'm paying off an incredible amount of debt that I'll never get out of.
Positive vibes and advice for the mental side of this challenge are greatly appreciated. Thank you all <3 IWNDWYT