r/sextips • • 8h ago

Advice Needed Boyfriend goes soft whenever we have intimacy, why?

8 Upvotes

Hello, so basically, my boyfriend and I just started becoming more intimate with one another. we are each others firsts so we're learning together. The issue is, he is selfless, which is nice. He tries hard to get me to orgasm, so no issues there.

the issue comes with the fact that he goes soft easy. Usually when hes doing something to me, he's soft, which I heard is normal. When I start touching him and giving him a handjob, he's hard but i havent been able to make him cum because it takes too long??? idk if im doing it wrong or what.

the main thing that got to me was I was giving him head for the first time, and for no reason, halfway through, he went soft. I was confused and he seemed to be as well, and he ended up just jerking himself off till he came. Is he not attracted to me?? Is it something with me because obviously he can cum, he did but when he did it himself. Idk if i was doing it wrong id never done it before, but even when we tried having sex for the first time, he went soft after putting the condom on and trying to enter. I don't understand, is it me or him????? does this mean its a sign he isnt into me or something? pleaase help and give tips if possible.

edit to add as well: hes almost always hard around me normally. Like if we're cuddling or anything or even just a small kiss, hes hard... its literally just when we do stuff


r/sextips • • 46m ago

Advice Needed Sexy Content for husband

• Upvotes

I really try and keep our sex life extra spicy and to do things that he didn’t even know he’d like or wouldn’t think of himself in the moment.

I had an idea dawn on me the other day for a spicy video. We do send eachother pics and videos and keep them locked in our hidden folders on our phones for each others alone time, or when we’re trying to turn each other on.

We’ve each made lists for eachother of specific content we’d like from the other. A few of which I haven’t gotten to yet.

I’m really just kinda curious if the idea I thought of separate from his list is actually hot, or if it’s not as hot as I think it would be.

I want to make him a video of me giving a propped up dildo a handjob combined with a boob job and “talk him through it”.

Thoughts? Guys, if your partner did this, would it be hot? Or am I just thinking it would be way hotter than it actually would be? Gals, if you’ve done this what has your partners reaction been?

Honesty needed, and thanks in advance.


r/sextips • • 8m ago

Sex Toys dealing with buttplug trauma. how do i get over one bad experience?

• Upvotes

to keep it short and sweet, 2 years ago me and my current boyfriend (both 23FM) were having sex, and i was using a standard metal buttplug, one of the gem heart ones. we did doggy, missionary, standing, all that and everything was fine. when i was riding him, i felt like my plug was slipping out and i couldn’t feel it, so i reached behind me, felt the gem of the buttplug, and it felt like it wasn’t in far enough. so in the heat of the moment, i pushed it further in and then boom. couldn’t feel it anymore. it was gone but it didn’t come out, it went all the way in.

i immediately stopped us having sex, went into the bathroom, and reached wrist deep into my ass digging for the damn plug. my boyfriend offered to help get it out, but we had just freshly started dating and having sex so i would’ve rather killed myself. but, i got it out thank god, but i haven’t used one since, because now i have a fear that my ass will eat it again, even though the only reason that happened, was because i pushed it in. anyways, any advice on easing back into using buttplugs and getting over this trauma? thanks!!


r/sextips • • 16h ago

Advice Needed Eddie ED Device Questions?

2 Upvotes

I noticed this add while scanning Reddit a few days ago. Did a little research and it seems like it may be somewhat legitimate. I was curious if anybody has tried it?


r/sextips • • 19h ago

Advice Needed How to give my girlfriend HER orgasm

3 Upvotes

My gf and I have been together for a year and a half and I honestly downloaded Reddit just to hopefully get some advice. My gf can only make herself cum one specific way and she gets really embarrassed about it. She has to like lie on her stomach and hold a blanket or pillow between her legs and then humps it and has these crazy orgasms that last like 30-45 seconds each. She describes the feeling as being very far back, like not quite her anus but a little before there?? She says sex still feels good for her but she’s never been able to recreate that specific orgasm with any partner before. Any ideas on things we could try to replicate that same feeling?


r/sextips • • 20h ago

How to? I cannot make her squirt

1 Upvotes

We are both 25 and been together for quite some years. Our sex has been amazing and hands down one of the best. Always hard f and long rounds. We usually do 2-4 rounds, twice or thrice a week and I usually make her orgasms 2-5x during foreplay and sex.

She was always honest that her first boyfriend made her squirt twice in their relationship. Then the following exes wasn’t able to.

I am the 4th. I can confidently say all my partners had orgasms but one thing I have never done yet in my life is to make a woman squirt.

After 7 yrs of her last squirting moment. She squirted using a vibrator tonight while I was watching her do it. Now I feel bad that no matter how hard I study/learn it. I just cant but I know she can squirt.

Am I just not on the level of her first boyfriend or am I doing something wrong?


r/sextips • • 1d ago

Advice Needed F23 How to make him the focus

5 Upvotes

F23, I'm a sex repulsed asexual who can't even vaginally orgasm (which I heard is common), I also have vaginismus which is probably where the repulsion comes from… so, the average sex would just be painful and unsatisfying.

I have no desire to **need** to enjoy it, but I want my partner to enjoy it. No, I'm not being forced/begged by him, I myself have interest in what he’s interested in. But, I don't want the focus to be on me, because we would just be wasting both of our time.

What could I do to turn the focus mostly on him? And in a way where I don't have to fake an orgasm or pretend I'm enjoying something?

Also, any tips for beginner women would be super welcome. I'm not a virgin, but I'm not “good” at it either because I only had sex one time and I did NOT do well…


r/sextips • • 1d ago

Sex Tip I've heard a bit about Post-cum Torture. Does it really feel pleasurable?

17 Upvotes

So I've discovered a whole new type of sexual kink, post-cum torture, where you keep going after the male ejaculates (usually the women would be holding him down and fucking him, rather than the male doing it himself)

Obviously this feels unpleasant for the man, certainly in the first few seconds after ejaculating, so I'm curious to find out what makes post-cum torture so desirable and pleasurable for some people?

If you can put it into words, could you describe the feeling it gives you, and explain how to get there?

I mean, not that it really affects me directly at the moment. I'm eighteen and I still haven't had a girlfriend or any sort of sexual activity for someone. I'd still love to know more, so I can understand it better, especially when viewing videos of it. 🙂


r/sextips • • 1d ago

Advice Needed Had sex after a long time, couldn’t perform well, need advice

1 Upvotes

Hey guys, so I matched with this girl on a dating platform and we hooked up on our first date. We had a good foreplay for around 15-20 minutes.

But when penetration took place I couldn’t cum, I didn’t even feel the excitement of it. I don’t know about her, how she felt.

We tried multiple positions, but I just couldn’t cum, also I didn’t feel much pleasure. I got a solid erection tho

The same happened for the second time we had sex.

Is this because maybe we are not yet pretty much connected yet? Or is this a common problem when you have sex after a good amount of break?

Need some genuine advise so that I don’t fail for the third time straight


r/sextips • • 2d ago

General Question What does penetration actually feel like for women if it doesn't usually lead to orgasm? NSFW

36 Upvotes

Hi everyone. I recently learned that the vast majority of women don't reach orgasm from penetration alone. As someone inexperienced, I’m genuinely curious about how this feels from a woman's perspective.

If penetration doesn't lead to orgasm, is it still intensely pleasurable on its own, or is the enjoyment mostly about emotional intimacy and closeness? How would you describe the actual feeling of penetration and how pleasurable it is for you?

I also can't help but wonder about size here. Could it be that an average size, around 5 inches in length and girth, simply doesn't feel like enough physically to get over that threshold? Or is reaching orgasm through penetration not really a question of size at all?

I’d really appreciate your honest perspectives!


r/sextips • • 1d ago

General Question Glasses on or off for facial?

4 Upvotes

When a man cums on your face is it better to leave your glasses on, so you can keep your eyes open and enjoy the show. Then you have to wash the cum off your glasses. Or is it better to take off your glasses, close your eyes and take what you got coming right to the face?


r/sextips • • 1d ago

Advice Needed How to navigate feeling undesired?

3 Upvotes

I often crave my wife, I want her, I tell her, I compliment her and I usually instigate intimate play. However, it is very rare that she will compliment, show desire for or instigate anything with me. I’ve discussed this at length with her and told her over the past few years how i would like more from her.

We’ve introduced chastity to control my desires, remove pressure on her and to allow her to control what happens and when. This worked well for a while but she often just sets and forgets and rarely if ever asks for anything. I’ve offered to purely focus on her sexually, as often as she wants, without any expectation that she does anything to me. I would genuinely like to be used to please her only. However, she has rarely engaged in this with me.

She says she doesn’t desire sex or intimacy and it rarely crosses her mind.

We have two young kids and I’ve been trying to do a lot more to take the load off her mind. I cook more, clean more, drop off/pickup more, take the kids out more and still nothing.

I’m at a bit of a loss. She used to be really into intimacy, she claims nothing is wrong and that she just doesn’t feel she needs it. She won’t go to the doctors about it, she won’t discuss it with anyone, she says she understands where I’m coming from but won’t do anything about it.

I love her a lot, I believe she still loves me a lot, I know there is no one else, we simply don’t have time and spend a lot of time together so that’s out of the question.

I feel lonely, sad, unwanted and like we are living a roommate lifestyle raising kids. I’ve tried so hard to be flirty, take her on dates, we laugh, we enjoy each others company, she tells me she loves me but I can never get her to desire me and it’s hard to instigate all the time with a fear of being rejected.

I’ve almost started to resent her, it feels like she’s getting everything she wants out of the relationship and I’m not getting the bit I need.

She doesn’t want to leave, I don’t want that either but I want to be sexually desired.

Would I be completely out of my mind at this point to ask her if I can see other people for my sexual needs?

I should add that I’ve floated couples therapy and she refuses, says we don’t need it.

I don’t want to spend the rest of my life feeling like I do but I also can’t see life without her.

TDLR - wife of 6 years (partner of 14) has no sexual desire and I’m tired of feeling rejected and lonely. Not sure if suggesting an open marriage is going to be the only way forward - divorce not currently on the cards.


r/sextips • • 2d ago

Advice Needed How to make getting eaten out feel better

27 Upvotes

I mean it doesn’t feel bad but I think everytime it’s lasted like 10ish minutes before we moved on. Like I can feel it like I can feel their tongue and it feels good sometimes but I just can’t come from it.

Am i supposed to be more sensitive to it because I really thought it would be like the best thing I’ve felt but it’s really not and I get bored, I guess?😬 I mean I like it but I’m usually faking my moans. I just want it to be more pleasurable for me and my partner.


r/sextips • • 2d ago

General Question How can me and my gf make someone our cuck?

8 Upvotes

How can me and my gf find someone to watch us have sex or how can we ask someone that knows us to watch us have sex?


r/sextips • • 2d ago

General Question Is windows open during hotel sex illegal?

3 Upvotes

Is it illegal to have sex on the highest story of a hotel with window curtains wide open and other buildings around taller than the hotel??


r/sextips • • 2d ago

How to? How to foreplay if you're shyy

3 Upvotes

When we're having sex and he wants to foreplay i got shy even though I'm horny too i just get cringe by myself


r/sextips • • 2d ago

General Question Can you give head (to a man) if you have a permanent retainer?

3 Upvotes

I’ve been so worried that if I give a guy head I’ll somehow slice his dick

Has anyone with a permeant retainer given a guy head?


r/sextips • • 3d ago

Advice Needed what can I do? We don’t have sex anymore

2 Upvotes

Hi guys i need advice, me 24 and my 25 bf have been dating for a while now over a year, we have always had a semi okay sexual relationship just due to it being a new thing for the both of us. Recently maybe in July or August, I couldn’t go over to his home anymore as his landlord he rents from had moved more people in so it got congested. Which that I understand, but since then we’ve only had sex once :/ and I’m starting to get a little bit sad. I’ve made many attempts with him to try and nothing ever works. He always tells me to wait for another time or something but it’s like I have needs also. We won’t have a room to ourselves until Halloween so I’m just frustrated waiting until then for anything sexual at all. Any tips?


r/sextips • • 3d ago

Sex Tip Tips on getting better at giving blowjobs?

11 Upvotes

My boyfriend (24M) and I (21F) have been together for a little over a year, and we have a really great sex life. He has had multiple sexpartners before me but he's the only one Ive been with.

I’ve given him oral a few times, but honestly, I feel like I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing lol. I really want to get better at it because I want him to enjoy it, and I’d love to be able to incorporate it more naturally into foreplay.
First of all, I never really know what I’m supposed to do. I usually start by licking the underside of his penis and moving my tongue up towards the tip, kissing the head, licking around it, and then eventually just sucking him off. But I have no idea if I’m doing things right, what feels good for most guys, or how to make it feel better rather than just repetitive.

Secondly, I struggle a LOT with having his penis in my mouth for more than a short amount of time. He’s pretty average in size, but I start gagging almost immediately if I try to take more of him into my mouth. I can usually only keep going for around 20–30 seconds before I need to stop or take a break. I also struggle with finding a rhythm or going faster without feeling like I’m just awkwardly moving my head back and forth.

I really want to be able to do it for longer and feel more confident, instead of constantly worrying about whether I’m doing a good job. I want it to feel good for him, but I also want to actually know what I’m doing rather than just guessing the whole time.

So, what are your best tips for beginners? What do guys generally enjoy the most? How do you figure out what to do with your tongue and how to find a good rhythm? And for those who used to struggle with gagging, did anything actually help?
I’d especially love advice from women who felt just as clueless when they first started or what u men like! Please be specific because I genuinely need the beginner's guide lol.


r/sextips • • 4d ago

Advice Needed Partner not a fan of oral sex?

10 Upvotes

Not a long story but, my partner doesn’t like giving me oral sex. I told him I really enjoy receiving it and he does it… but I can cleary tell he doesn’t want to and he always puts it off and “waits for the end”. I know he waits because doing it turns him off. I obviously completely respect his boundaries but am I wrong for still asking even if he isn’t a fan? He does it when I ask but he DEFINITELY doesn’t enjoy it. What should I do?

EDIT: to go into detail… I make sure it’s VERY clean. I eat healthy and drink water. I always wash it before, I always shave, and I make sure it’s clean. There’s just another reason and every time he tells me that “it has nothing to do with me” and he says he doesn’t have a specific reason he doesn’t like it


r/sextips • • 4d ago

Advice Needed How to last longer than 10-15 minutes

23 Upvotes

Hey everyone,
I (M) usually last about 10-15 minutes max when having sex with my girlfriend, then I finish. I’d like to last longer and make things more enjoyable for both of us.
I’m not looking for the classic “think about something unsexy” tip — that doesn’t really work for me and I’d rather get more practical, serious advice.
Has anyone dealt with this and found things that actually helped? Techniques, positions, mindset stuff, breathing, exercises, whatever worked for you. Open to any real experience-based suggestions.
Thanks in advance.


r/sextips • • 4d ago

Sex Tip Sex mit meiner 70 jährigen Nachbarin

6 Upvotes

Hey bin M24 meine Nachbarin W70. Ich hab seit 1 Monat erst richtig mit ihr Kontakt sie hat mich öfters zum Kaffee eingeladen so führte das eine zum anderen und sie sagte das sie seit 10 Jahren kein Sex hatte seit ihr Mann verstorben ist und das sie unbedingt wieder will.
So jetzt haben wir uns für morgen früh verabredet das ich zu ihr komme und es mit ihr treibe. Es ist mein erstes Mal mit einer Gilf muss ich was beachten ? Habt ihr Tipps Worauf ich achten muss ? Wie bekomme ich sie am besten zum kommen wenn sie 10 Jahre kein Sex hatte
Ich selber bin gut bestückt würde ich behaupten 19x7cm
Bitte um hilfreiche Antworten
Danke


r/sextips • • 3d ago

Advice Needed How do you guys handle feeling 110% horny on a Monday, so you're making plans to meet someone, and when that day come say Friday, you're just feeling tired and not that into it any more? I want to have sex and I'm not masturbating before so its not that, any tips?

1 Upvotes

Title


r/sextips • • 4d ago

Advice Needed Man’s Advice 👀

7 Upvotes

So, as it says above, looking for some advice from a man’s side of things..

Like all men I love having sex (we all do right? 🤣) but I find I get too excited and end up ending before I prefer too, I’m not saying like 3 pumps and done, but usually no more than 10mins at max?
Can anyone offer any tips to help last that bit longer?

I’m working on my whole fitness level, as I’m sure that’ll help, but just looking for any other tips or suggestions to try! 🙌


r/sextips • • 3d ago

Sex Tip That thick, girthy cock stretching a soaked pussy open… fucking like animals until we were both completely wasted NSFW

0 Upvotes

I hooked up with this South Korean girl after she texted me that she’d had one of those weeks that leaves you hollowed out and desperate. Long hours, pressure, no real release. She said she needed something hard and deep, something that would shut her brain off. We barely made it through the door before clothes were hitting the floor. The second I got her on the bed and spread her legs I could already see how ready she was—pussy lips shiny, a thick strand of wetness already connecting her to the sheets. I dragged the heavy head of my cock up and down her slit a few times just to feel how slick she was, and she moaned like she’d been waiting days for that first contact.

I pressed forward. The fat crown started forcing her open and the sound was immediate—wet, slow, filthy squelch as her tight entrance stretched wide around the girth. Inch by thick inch I sank into her. Her walls gripped me like they were trying to stop the intrusion and pull me deeper at the same time. Soft, scorching heat wrapped around every vein, every ridge. She sucked in a sharp breath and then let it out in a long, shaky moan. “Fuck… I can feel every thick vein… you’re stretching me so much…” Her accent made it sound even dirtier. I kept pushing until my hips met hers and I was buried to the base. Her pussy fluttered hard around me, little involuntary pulses that milked the full length while she adjusted to the stretch.

I stayed deep for a few seconds, just grinding, letting her feel the weight of it inside her. Then I started moving. Slow at first—long, deliberate strokes that pulled almost all the way out until only the head was stretching her open, then drove back in with a heavy, wet plop every time my body met hers. The sounds were pure filth. Constant squelching, the soft wet slap of skin, that unmistakable *plop* whenever her stretched hole tried to close and I forced it wide again. Her juices coated my shaft completely, dripping down my balls, making sticky strings every time I withdrew. She was already moaning louder, hips rolling up to meet every thrust, nails digging into my back.

I picked up the pace. Deeper, harder. The bed started creaking under us. Every stroke dragged those thick veins along her walls and she kept telling me she could feel them—every ridge, every pulse. Her pussy was getting messier by the second. Wet sounds grew louder and more constant: deep squelches on the way in, a wet suck on the way out, the occasional soft *plop* when I’d pull free just enough for her hole to gape for a second before I slammed back home. She came the first time with a broken cry, body locking up, walls clamping down so hard I had to push through the contractions. I didn’t stop. Kept fucking her through it, long strokes that made her keep spasming and leaking around me.

She was still shaking when I flipped her onto her stomach and pulled her hips up. The view from behind almost finished me—her pussy puffy and open, lips stretched wide around my girth every time I sank in, a shiny trail of her wetness running down her thighs. I slammed back in and the sound was even filthier like this. Heavy wet plops, constant squelching, the slap of my hips against her ass. She pushed back hard, moaning into the sheets, begging for more. “Harder—please—stretch me—don’t stop—” I gave it to her. Animalistic, deep, relentless strokes that forced her open over and over. Her walls stayed wrapped tight around me even as she got more and more stretched, gripping every thick vein, fluttering and milking with every thrust.

She came again, harder this time. Legs trembling, voice cracking into high, desperate moans. I kept going, fucking her through the orgasm until she was sobbing with pleasure and still pushing back for more. The wetness was ridiculous now—every thrust pushed more of her juices out around my cock, coating everything, making the squelching louder and messier. I reached under and rubbed her clit while I pounded her and she came a third time almost immediately, whole body jerking, pussy clamping and releasing in waves that tried to milk me dry.

I pulled out just long enough to flip her onto her back again and shove her legs up toward her chest. The second I pushed back in she moaned like she’d been empty too long. I fucked her like that—deep, heavy strokes that bottomed out every time, the wet *plop* of my cock forcing its way into her stretched hole over and over. She kept telling me how good it felt, how full she was, how she could feel every vein dragging along her walls. Her hands were everywhere—on my chest, clawing at my arms, reaching down to feel where we were connected. “You’re so thick… fuck, I can feel you stretching me open…”

We got rougher. I hooked her legs over my shoulders and drove into her hard enough that the headboard started hitting the wall. She was moaning nonstop now, pure animal sounds mixed with broken words. “More—don’t stop—fuck me—use me—” Her pussy was completely open for me, still gripping tight but stretched wide enough that every stroke produced that wet, gaping *plop* when I pulled back and the soft suck when I pushed back in. Juices were everywhere—on my cock, on her thighs, on the sheets. She came again, screaming this time, walls pulsing hard around the full length of me while I kept pounding through it.

I was close but I wanted to drag it out. I pulled out, flipped her onto all fours again, and buried myself in one long stroke. The sound was pure filth—loud wet squelch, heavy slap, her moan turning into a cry. I fucked her like an animal from there. Hard, deep, relentless. No more slow strokes. Just raw, heavy thrusting that made her whole body rock forward with every impact. She was pushing back just as hard, meeting every thrust, moaning and begging. “Creampie me—please—fill me up—I need your cum inside me—” She said it over and over, voice wrecked and desperate. Her pussy kept clenching and releasing, trying to milk me, walls wrapped tight around every thick vein even as she stayed stretched open.

I held out as long as I could because the feeling was too good—the heat, the wet grip, the way her body kept taking the full girth and asking for more. When I finally let go it hit hard. Thick, hot ropes pumping deep into her. She came the second she felt the first pulse, crying out and clamping down so tightly it forced more cum out around my cock with every spurt. I kept thrusting through it, slow and deep now, pushing the cum further inside her, feeling it get forced out around the base and drip down. The wet sounds turned even messier—squelching mixed with the soft wet noise of cum and her juices being fucked in and out of her.

When I finally pulled out there was a thick, wet *plop* and then a heavy stream of my cum started oozing from her stretched hole, running down her lips and thighs in thick white lines. She was still twitching, breathing hard, looking completely wrecked. I watched it drip for a few seconds, then she turned around, still on her knees, and cleaned every last drop off my cock. Slow, thorough, tongue dragging along the thick shaft, lips wrapping around the head, sucking the taste of both of us off me until I was clean. She looked up afterward with that glazed, satisfied expression and just said she could still feel how open and full she was.

We didn’t stop there. After a short break we went again, even rougher. Same thick stretch, same filthy wet sounds—constant squelching, wet plops, the soft gape and suck every time I forced my way back into her. She came hard multiple more times, legs shaking, voice gone hoarse from moaning. She kept begging for the creampie and I gave it to her again, pumping another load deep into her already messy, stretched pussy. By the end we were both completely wasted—sweaty, breathing hard, her pussy swollen and leaking, my cock still twitching from how hard and how many times she’d milked me. She lay there with my cum slowly oozing out of her and just kept saying how good the stretch had felt, how she could still feel every thick vein, how badly she’d needed to get fucked like that after the long week.

That combination of the physical stretch—her walls wrapping tight around the girth and getting forced open on every stroke—and the pure wet, animalistic mess of it is what made it so addictive. The sounds alone were enough to keep me hard: the constant squelch, the wet *plop* of a thick cock stretching a soaked hole, the soft suck when I pulled back. For her it was clearly the fullness, the repeated orgasms until she was shaking and dripping, and the way she got to feel every ridge and vein dragging inside her. We fucked until neither of us had anything left. If you’ve got the girth and you find someone who craves that deep, stretching pressure and doesn’t mind getting properly wet and messy until you’re both wasted… sessions like that stay burned into your head for a long time.

Take your time at first so she can feel every inch opening her up. Then stop being careful. Fuck her like an animal. Give her the deep, wet, rhythmic pounding that makes those filthy sounds and lets her cum as many times as her body will allow. And when she begs for the creampie—give it to her hard and deep. The way it feels pumping into that already-stretched, juicy pussy, and the way it looks and feels oozing back out while she cleans you off afterward, is half the entire pleasure.