Hello everyone! I kind of just wanted to rant a little and see if anyone else has had similar feelings.

I feel obligated to add AMAB

I’m still in the closet, it sucks, I have next to no time alone because of my wife and housemates always being home. I’ve come out to my wife but she isn’t 100% on board. There is a whole post I can do about my wife’s feelings and opinions on this but I’m working on that with my wife and therapist. But the point is, I have a couple times a month I can truly express myself when I’m feeling feminine. It can be really rough.

I’ve found small subtle ways I can present that makes me feel better but it usually leaves me wanting more. Sometimes I feel extremely dysphoric about how hairy I am and sometimes it makes me panic a little.

But the times I feel masculine I’m like “oh hell yea brother!” And it’s cool!

Then, every now and then I look at myself in the mirror and I think it’s silly that there’s a man looking back at me. It’s like “oh I’m handsome! But that’s not me” and it feels like I’m “cosplaying” a guy. I get this feeling like “well, if I’m gonna be stuck being a guy, at least I’m a handsome guy.” And it feels cool and strange at the same time. I think overall I like it though. lol

Anyone out there relate?

TL;DR instead of getting dysphoria it feels funny that I’m stuck looking like a guy but at least I’m a handsome guy!

Im like more less 70% sure, idk if it is dysphoria or something, but I just identified that sometimes I dissociate from being a man and kinda start disliking being a man and start wanting to be a woman instead of wishing I was born as a woman, but also there is some times I think I want to stay as a man, sometimes under the thought that I like to have a flat chest and I would actually miss it if I had boobs and no way to go back.

I’m a femboy and I’ve been a femboy since I was 18, I’m 20 now, and dressing feminine kinda helped me realize that I might be some percentage of genderfluid, I grew up as a man, and my problem is that normally I hate masculinity, most men around me are a bunch of assholes, so there comes my other dilemma, I sometimes feel like a boy but want to be feminine, and sometimes I would like to be a girl or maybe think about it, but I never want to be masculine unless I was a masculine girl, but I just don’t like masculinity and it gives me a lot of dysphoria.

Although I’m still kinda learning how to identify my gender identity and try to understand when the changes happen, and I’ve identified signals but I’m still not sure how they work.

Also been wondering if I could maybe do an HRT in the future, not to become a girl but more like look kinda androgynous so it would be easier to pass.

Also I don’t know if it is because of some kind of internalized transphobia I have but I just don’t know how to identify what pronouns I should use or how to tell someone that I want certain pronouns. For now I just conformed to putting in my profiles that my pronouns are he/she or any, so people can just choose, I’ve already saw some people talking to me using she/her pronouns which kinda feels good.

Also I don’t know at what grade of female I reach because I may not identify fully as a girl when it happens but more like a Demigirl, also I noticed that the changes syncronize with my want to dress feminine and like I sometimes feel so good in femboy clothing but sometimes I just don’t want to put them on.

I know that this is long but I kinda wanted to let it all out and like I also wanted to get advice cause I don’t really know much about being genderfluid

So I’m bigender & genderfluid, and I have a very prominent chest (DD, or E cup idk the exact size) and I want a binder that makes them less prominent but you can still tell somethings there (think a B or C cup) because I love being more ambiguous and that’s not possible rn with my chest. So if you have any suggestions on binders that work well for something like this I’d really appreciate any suggestion!!

I really want to talk to my family & friends about being Genderfluid but I’m terrified.
I’m 97% sure they’ll all be super supportive even if they don’t fully understand it but there’s just that little whisper of worry at the back of my mind.

hi, I'm 22, I'm genderfluid, I've known this since i was 14

I've tried living as a man because i thought it would be easier, but in reality it made me miserable, when i started being openly genderfluid/nb and saying i use all pronouns i made me so much happier

but you can't do that everywhere, my id has a masc name so people just assume I'm a man, I don't like that, even when I'm feeling super masculine inside i just don't like being seen as just a man. but i also can't just go around saying I'm nonbinary, especially living in a super transphobic country

how do you deal with the fact that society is super binary and it makes it difficult to be yourself?

I'm semi-attached to my birth name but it is extremely feminine and I keep debating if I should change it to something more gender neutral or masculine.

I hated my birth name my whole life and I never fully felt attached to it until recently. I had a super bad childhood outside of my gender identity so hearing that name always made me feel like I was in trouble or something. I've been living with my boyfriend for almost a year now and months ago I asked him to call me my birth name and it's felt so healing to hear someone say that name with love. I still don't know how attached to it I really am, and I don’t let anyone else call me it besides him. My middle name is Wren, it feels more like me; and while it is a gender neutral name in technicality it is predominantly feminine where I live to the point that a man being named Wren here is odd.

I heavily dislike other people calling me my birth name and legally changing it to something else would eliminate anyone else calling me by it. Should I change my first name legally (since I am going to change my last name when I get married and I am not willing to keep my maiden name) to ease my gender dysphoria, or should I keep it since I still feel some attachment?

notes:

1. My gender identity feels predominantly neutral but will sway masculinely or femininely so a more flexible unisex name would ease a bit of my dysphoria.

2. I don't like how Wren and my new last name will both end in N, but I feel attached to Wren.

3. I have a couple of ideas for a new first or middle name, but I'm not very connected to any yet, also asking my boyfriend and my friends to address me by a new name is always very awkward (name recommendations are welcomed).

4. I am also not getting legally married for about a year so this will not be an irrational and rushed decision.

Hello! I am someone who is wanting to write a gender fluid character as one of the main side characters. But I have no experience, nor anyone in my life to ask about these things.

So, a few questions if you have time to answer! :)

Note: this is a high fantasy story with a younger androgynous elf healer who's still discovering things about their gender as the character. They don't feel as if they properly fall into either category, but have a rather indifferent feeling about being referred to as either gender at any time because they just want to do their job.

What does shifting between genders feel like for you?

Is it slow, instant?

Does it last hours, days?

Is it ever distinctly only feminine or masculine or is it always a combination in some form?

Does your experience with the gender you were assigned at birth differ now that you identify differently? Or (Example) if you were a male at birth, do you still have the same experience when you're feeling more masculine?

What specific situations do you tend to shift to one or the other?

This may be seem like a stereotype, but it's a genuine question to try and learn. Do you shift to a more masculine feeling when you need to be "tougher" or "stronger" in the face of a difficult situation, or do you stick where you are?

How can dysphoria affect day-to-day life?

Anything else you would like to add to the gender fluid experience to be represented properly! I know it's different for everyone, but I don't want to just throw something out blindly with actually hearing people's stories. If anything is wildly off, please feel free to kindly correct me :)

Just as the title says, and I feel great about it.

it just kinda clicked for me that even after I transitioned, I was still trying to cram and squeeze myself into some kind of box. I believe my internalized misogyny played a pretty large part, but once I saw it I couldn't unsee it and I've been trying my best to reject those views whether they are subconscious or what. I never had to try to erase parts of myself just to try to prove my masculinity or validate my transition to the people in my life. I think I am ready to embrace myself as I am without judgement. I feel free!! Its like it's been forever since I last felt this kind of euphoria. Cheers to healing I think!

Hiii, I'm Basil (20GF) and I've been considering for a while to start taking topical minoxidil for a happy trail on my stomach.

A happy trail is what gives me the most confidence and makes me feel most like how I'm supposed to be in my body.

I only want hair concentrated to my stomach, not my chest or anywhere else

I was hoping I could find someone who has or knows someone who has taken it for similar reasons and could tell me any risks, side effects, and hopefully successes.

Like does the hair only stay in the applied spot, or does it spread out from there? I've heard that hair growth from Minoxidil is not permanent for some people, so that's also another question.

Does it affect people around you, and has it ever accidentally gotten on a partner?

My girlfriend is of the intentionally smooth-skinned variety, and I don't want to accidentally mess something up. I guess I'm especially worried about this because I know you're supposed to let it dry anyways, but with it being on my stomach I have concerns.

I'm already aware of the health risks with pets and I've already researched and prepared for that. My roommate owns budgies (parakeets) and I plan to only apply it in my room before bed, and wash it off in the shower the morning after.

I’m a bisexual boy, and think I might be genderfluid.
Attraction is obvious to me bc I feel it in my body since adolescence.
Concerning gender fluidity, the process was a bit longer, today I feel like I notice it in some things, but at the same time I could just be someone with wide taste?

I wanna box and I wanna dance, I love boxers and cheeky briefs. In bed I love being dominant and I love being submissive. I’d like to get my nails done, wear makeup and also strengthen my grip and have callous hands. I like stockings and I like Levi’s 511s.
I like wearing suits and very short shorts. If I wasn’t so tall I think I’d love wearing heels the same way I enjoy wearing work boots.

I guess what I’m asking is, is that enough to define oneself as genderfluid? Is it worth noting that I don’t feel the need to change my body, as I always believed (a belief that only implicates myself) that gender is more about performance than it is about biological differences?

What complicates things for me is that it’s relatively linked to romantic dynamics : i often see the femininity in me from the point of view of an imaginary male romantic partner, same with the masculinity, with a female partner.

Hence my question, is all this supposed to revolve this much around attraction, desire and ultimately sex?
Am I putting myself into boxes based on binary outdated stereotypes?

Well this is it, first post here, please be forgiving if I’m offensive in any way I do not wish to be, but do tell me so I don’t do the same mistake again.
Im kinda lost, so any opinion or advice is welcome, and if you have a similar or wildly different experience I’d be all ears as well.

So, my entire life I haven't really had a chance to think about my sexuality due to how I grew up, and my family made it very clear that they don't accept anything other than the lgb in lgbtq+ but I always assumed myself to be cisgender and straight.

Well, now that I live alone due to moving out for college. I've had a little extra free time to think about myself, and since my junior year of high school I've slowly felt something in me change over time. I'm 18, and just now starting college.

I identify with the sex I was born as, which is male, and I think of myself as a man. But some days I feel like a girl? Which makes me want to dress cute and feminine, but other days I want to appear more like a femboy instead of one or the other.

Anyway, I started watching Ranma1/2 today, and I cane to this conclusion that I would love to have Ranma's curse. Because then I can switch back and forth whenever I felt a certain way. So, I talked to my best friend/brother from another family. He immediately said "THE PIPELINE IS REAL" which caught me off guard because he apparently knew years before I did.

Anyway, I feel more confident in myself on my feminine days, and I kinda like it. So, I've started incorporating feminine clothes into my outfits slowly every day. I have this cute crop top that I like to wear with th a misfits t-shirt. I had another one of my close friends order me a fishnet shirt, which arrives friday, I'm very excited for it.

TLDR; I started thinking about myself on a deeper level and watching Ranma helped me realize more about myself.

Edit: Added my age for better context

I wanna start going by Elliot and when I first heard it out loud from my older sister, it felt so weird. My given name is quite a bit different than Elliot and I HATE change. I'm not sure if it's something with it just not being a right fit or if it's something that might take a bit to feel right. Let me know how changing your name felt at first please!

For context, I'm 19yo and AMAB, and a recently cracked egg.

I've been debating going on estrogen for a little bit, and I was hoping I could get some input from someone with a bit more experience on the matter. Here's my thinking so far:

Even when I'm feeling more masc, I want some of the effects of E, especially the emotional expansion, but also the softer skin and (depending on how masc I feel) the fat distribution.

The thing holding me back is even when I feel fem, I don't want any more than a b-cup, and genetics aren't exactly on my side for that. (I know, steak to buttery, etc.) And when I'm masc, I absolutely don't want any. I could bind, but I really enjoy swiming, and I play brass instruments, which binding would make hard.

after a week or 2 i figured it out i am…questioning

it will probably take a bit before i do anything that would tell me that if im gender fluid or not so for now i am simply in the questioning phase

for now

I (21F) have never felt particularily connected to my gender. I have also known I liked girls since 7th grade, and I now identify as a lesbian.

Then, in hs, I cut off all my hair, dressed as a boy, and used he/him pronouns for myself in my head. I actually passed well as a guy, I used the boys bathroom a lot. When I think back to that time, I picture myself as an androgenous boy, not girl. This was a big problem, since my mom was super homophobic so she always tried to make me wear girls clothes, wear hair clips, etc.

I ended up in a depressive episode after finding out I was autistic, which only made my gender dysphoria go up. So around junior in high school, I stopped dressing boyish cause I was tired of fighting with my mom, and kept on dressing androgenous and hated when I was forced to dress feminine. So I used it/its pronouns for myself or they/them pronouns for another two years.

Now that I am an adult, I realized I can be whatever I want to be now. I am in a very feminine part of my life rn, and I identify as a woman. However there is still that part of me that feels like this too is just a phase? Or like a show I am putting on for people. I found out about the term genderfluid recently.

Someone asked me what pronouns I am chill with. I like she/her pronouns, thats what Ive been going by. But I also feel like in a perfect world I would use she/it/they/any pronouns. But I worry that I am not actually genderfluid since my gender changes slowly, like over the years. And I still identify as a woman cause I identify as a lesbian.

Went to a concert the other day and my wife told me people were checking me out! That’s never happened to me before! I’m riding the high still lol

I need help understanding my identity 🫩

I was AMAB and identified as gender fluid from 2023-last month, then i wasnt so sure anymore. I thought and still wonder if I could be trans, and spent a couple weeks identifying as female (in my head), and called myself a new name, even told my friend i "think im trans" and went on to dye my hair, taking on a new and more feminine apperance.

Since 2024 i didnt spend more than 1-2 days presenting as female, then in June a relationship ended that i presented almost entierly male thoughout (for roughly 1 year). Scince then my feminine side grew and i became more comfortable with it.

However, as time passed my feelings toward this identity have faded and today im no longer certin if im trans or still just gender fluid. OR, if ive just accepted it as normal and dont feel 'gay enough' as its not part of my regular day anymore.

Anyway, do any gender fluid pros have epic knowledge that could be helpful to me solving who i am? Maybe someone could pick my brain..? 🤔

Thanks for reading 👁👄👁

Recently I started wondering if I’m genderqueer. I always assumed I was a cis male but iv started looking into being a girl and I feel there might be something there. I started practicing voice training and I have really enjoyed being called a girl by some of my friends and want to start practicing make up etc. But I also feel like I’m ok with being a guy. Iv never really loved how I looked and I rarely put effort into it other than growing out my hair and getting locs. Am I bigender?, gender fluid? Cis? Somthing else? Idk

Sometimes I just want to scream, becouse I don't know what I am. It feels like moving to a new home every some weeks, like absolute stress until I find my way around and than I'm moving to a new home again.

It's properly the wrong words, but the best I could find.

Do other genderfluid people feel this feeling of "unstable" too?

How do you feel about purchasing items marketed to the gender you currently are not, even though it is the correct biological sex? Does it feel odd? My example is about one item, but it could be any number of things like scents or shampoo or somewhat generic items with more "feminine" colors.

I needed to replace a trimmer shaver, mostly for an initial trim down on my hairy legs, maybe more, and looked on a shopping site. They had them marketed to men and women. The men's had a better sale and slightly higher rating. I felt like I should buy the one for women and it was purple, which made me feel better about it. The men's had man parts in the product name, and it made me feel icky buying it, but it was a little more adequate and more discounted on sale. I didn't find any female looking reviews for it. Same with the women's trimmer, though I figure that probably had a female tax on it. I felt myself longing in a sad way to have the item labeled for women, and almost just got both of them. I don't know that I'll be using the trimmer so much on my legs when feeling demimale, but I'm not sure I would mind using the one for women, even if I had to use it on my face after going too long without shaving so a regular razor would work.

Such is life as a Fluid...

As someone who is genderfluid and spends most of my time as a man, does anyone else ever set aside time to really express fem and then not feel it because their energy isn't there. I think I need some androgynous style suggestions to feel more comfortable all the time

waddup yall!

so i'm AMAB and i've always identified solidly as a cis male (despite my hatred of gender roles). i have no desire to sit on the opposite end of the gender spectrum. i love being a dude! that being said...

i've been androgynous practically from birth, my name is primarily a female name despite being masculine in its origin. i wear my hair long, i'm more than happy to stay clean shaven, and i'm not afraid to adopt "feminine" mannerisms. i always get a flicker a joy when someone thinks i'm a girl or is otherwise confused about my gender. that's what's been tripping me up. despite my love of being a guy, i feel most at home when i'm presenting as a girl (or at least non-binary, in a way); clothes, makeup, etc. i want to be bonita on the outside while being macho on the inside, you know?

so what's this called? i don't exactly feel genderless or multiple things all at once, i just don't know what i really am. i figured you guys (gender neutral) could provide some assistance. am i genderfluid? non-binary? just a femboy going through an identity crisis? free to create my own path as a creature allegedly possessing free will? please help!

I'm writing a book about a Gender-fluid character born a male and I wanted some input on how it feels like to change between genders. Other experiences would be useful.

A brief summary of the opening is that they woke up from a dream and they go to the clothes they picked out from the day before but become fairly unhappy with it spending a good amount of time standing there upset. They eventually change to something more masculine the idea is they picked out a Feminine outfit the day prior.

If this isnt good at all please let me know