i had a complete hysterectomy over 7 months ago (everything removed, ovaries and everything) and ever since then things have gone the exact opposite of what i expected. my body has been looking much much worse. it feels like the shots are working the other way around.

i've been on testosterone for 2 years. blood levels are fine. e was a bit high before the surgery, now it's fine.

the midsection is so bad, so much bigger, worse then even before starting testosterone even. it feels like the shots are literally doing the opposite of what they're supposed to do. like i'm taking the other hormone

-edit: when i say "midsection" i mean the sides around the waist, not the stomach. "love handles" kind of but not in a "guy who needs to lose weight" way as much as "an old woman in her 60s" way. mostly the sides (and the ass too if i'm honest), even if i touch them from the back they feel bigger. it's the entire midsection so maybe hips too, but worst in the waist, or right above it, not the stomach.

a month and a half or so after the surgery things looked decent enough and i thought there was a bit of fat redistribution (i also hadn't looked at myself in a while) and then after that every shot would keep making my body fluctuate over and over again.

for a while it would start looking really bad (the middle looking bigger, feminine, gross. worse than it ever looked) then it would seem like it's getting more masculine again and it's getting better then it gets really bad again. over and over again. i was mostly on 250 mg/ml every 3 weeks at this point.

the past month and half i've been splitting the shots thinking that would help (i take 0.1 ml every other day) and the same thing is happening but it's even worse than before. it feels like i'm injecting e. i literally do not understand what is happening.

has anybody experienced this before? or has an explanation? and a solution

notes:

-about a month and half after the surgery when things were looking better it felt like things were headed in the right direction, at that point it felt like with a bit of working out things will be even better, now the midsection looks absolutely horrible in a hormone way. i don't know how to explain it but it's not that i need to lose weight or workout or something, it looks gross and looks like a hormonal thing

-blood levels are fine but when i started splitting the shots it made everything so much worse so quickly that i skipped a couple of shots but i'm back to taking it regularly, free testosterone is in the middle of the range. e is fine, not high not too low.

-this was happening for a few months before i skipped any shots obviously

-before the surgery i was on testosterone undecanoate (every 12 weeks) and the last shot caused this crazy water retention problem that felt like weight gain (whole separate problem i can't find a solution or explanation to) so i switched to testosterone enanthate after the surgery. so a shot every 3 weeks. thought it would be temporary and would eventually go back to the long acting one but i was terrified to inject something that would cause problems for that long at that point

-this started happening from the first shot after the surgery. but it kept getting much worse over time and it's much much worse the past couple of months than the first few months after the surgery

-i tried splitting testosterone undecanoate to 1 ml for every 3 weeks. it did the same thing, and it would keep fluctuating before taking the next shot

-now splitting the shot to 0.1 ml to every other day, everything is so much worse and as much as it fluctuates it's consistently so bad and never gets to a point where it feels like it's getting better like it did before (not that it mattered because it got bad again)

-i calculate when i'm supposed to take the shot down to the hour and a couple of times i messed up and took it half an hour early it made things even worse (and the water retention all over my body that feels like weight gain) so i don't even know how i could raise the dose if i needed to. because things also got bad extra quickly when i took 0.11 ml instead of 0.1 ml once

-i never had any of these problems before the surgery, things didn't look this bad (even when i didn't look, through clothes it was a million times better), nothing was ever fluctuating back and forth like this, it never felt like the hormones were working the other way around

-the last 3 week shot that i took before splitting them did this other separate problem where within days after taking the shot i felt like i was exploding and all my clothes got tighter in less than a week. so it's a bizarre version of water retention. and it's been 3 months and hasn't gone away. if anyone had similar experiences or has an idea what to do, please tell me. but i can't risk going back to a full shot because of that, even though splitting them has made things worse.

-i literally have no idea what is happening. whatever the answer or explanation is it's not an obvious thing. so while i need help, just know that it's not like a problem of needing to work out because it's not that, that is a plan but this is not a lack of exercise problem. there's nothing drastically different about anything before or after other than this.

-since i started splitting the shot i tried subcutaneous injections, still absolutely horrible. tried changing injection sites because subcutaneous in the abdomen was extra hellish. other sites are definitely bad. intramuscular is also bad.

-i tried taking a small dose of Anastrozole, it didn't help

-i'm 33. not in great shape but not exactly overweight. i don't know if that's relevant.

-i obviously went to doctors and nobody knows anything to help. nothing that medically alarming is wrong so they don't offer any explanation even.

-please if you say anything medical (especially if it's that i'm screwed) only say it if you actually are a doctor

-anybody have any similar experiences? and an explanation? does anybody have any ideas what i need to do??

sorry if i repeated myself but things are bad and i'm losing my mind

I did my first testosterone injection a week ago. I'd ordered my supplies and I was impatient to get it over with, but once I administered the shot, I felt nothing at all. Is this normal???

For context. My situation is complex because I've been socially 'detransitioned' for half a decade now (I ID'd as a trans man for 2 years as a teen). But I realised that I am actually still trans 1 year ago, and I've been seriously thinking about starting hormones for the last 3 months. So I just bit the bullet ig.

And I thought wow, I've wanted this for a while, I'm gonna be so excited to finally be taking steps to medical transition. But I didn't have any sort of positive reaction post-injection, just "huh, it was really that easy". I've read so many accounts of people on here saying that the world seemed brighter, their brain just felt RIGHT, they had so much energy and happiness after the first T shot. So I'm starting to worry that having a boy body just wasn't "meant to be" for me, or I've done something wrong, idk. Why am I not happy?

Been 6 days now and all I've really felt during the week is stress, about the painful lump at my injection site. I think my energy had increased a tiny bit today which worries me because aren't you supposed to be lethargic the day before your shot, not the other way round? It just contributes more to the fear I have that my body just isn't destined to run on T.

No proper effects have happened obviously since it's week 1 but idk, I feel like a fraud because I haven't had that gut feeling of everything falling into place after my first shot. Is it meant to be this anticlimactic? Or does it mean I rushed into this and I'll regret it?

i want to start at a lower dose so my parents dont know until i tell them some time later (when im less dependent on them). will being on a lower dose make it unable for me to get all of the changes when i get on a normal one later?

So i started talking to this guy and we planned to meet up and maybe hook up.

We had a phone call and i asked him some questions to guage if he was a chaser.

So hes Bi, has some attraction to cis women but not much, has abit more interest in cis men. But he said who he is mainly attracted to is trans men. Hes had a relationship with a trans man before. He said he sees trans men as men and is attracted to the masculinity. Also that he isnt attracted to trans women but doesnt seem like hes very interested in women generally. He told me hes most attracted too trans men and they are at the top of what hes most attracted too, cis men 2nd and then women. Said he would rather date a trans man but would date a cis guy as a second best option and probably wouldnt date women.

Also said he is just so amazed by trans man.
But also that were he thinks trans men are the best of both worlds. The best of both worlds is a chaser thing forsure but the rest has me confuse.

If he is ive never met this kind of chaser before and its confused me abit.

What do you think?

He doesnt over sexualise me and weve been having normal chats, only found this out cause i pressed him abit.

Is this a trans attracted person or just a chaser?

Tried to do research on this but seems people have different definitions of chasers and if trans attracted people are even a real concept?

So id appreciate your thoughts on it

Title. Nothing is off limits

I am not interested in advice regarding making peace with my anatomy as it is. I am asking about a sex change

Edit: I am located in Colorado

so I'm ftm, obviously, and my friends know too. at the time of writing this I am quite high so I hope this makes sense. we have a group chat with me, three girls, and one other (cis) guy. the one guy barely is in the group chat, so keep that in mind. well, my friends are very open and will talk about periods and stuff around me and in the group chat. my friend also has surgery stuff going on with her chests so she sometimes talks abour that around me.

now I'm not saying I'm grossed out by talking about bodily functions, but is it weird to have my friends talk to me like that? I mention that there's a cis man in the gc who is never there, so I don't even think he reads those messages and they don't talk like this around him irl. I'm scared I'm overthinking that I'm being treated like not a real guy around them, since they think they can talk to me like I'm one of the girls.

what do y'all think?

I stopped taking T shots after taking it for about 2 years and gel for 4 years. My facial hair growth hasn’t stopped it has just gotten slower? I want to keep taking T, i have alot of issues doing shots. I have had horrible experiences and i’m not great at getting bloodwork when it’s due. The medical professionals helping me are getting frustrated with me so i just stopped trying. I’m hoping to start back soon with a clear head. Preferably i want an automatic shot so I don’t have to slowly push the needle in myself, that’s my biggest issue. Anyway If anyone has any experience or advice i’d appreciate it.

hello lads, i'd love some binder recommendations, i need a new one for work. preferably not a hard panel (i already have a good one) and comfortable enough to wear for a long retail shift. i currently have a tomboyx one and it's fine i guess but i want something new. no budget restrictions on this

Basically as the title says: my testogel tells me to apply in the morning but I can’t because I go to the gym in the morning (so I’ll sweat it off and need to shower). I can’t alter when I go to the gym either because of my uni and work schedule.

Would there be any issues with me applying the gel at night?

This might be a stupid question, but it’s just a concern I have since the prescription outlines when I need to apply it.

Cheers.

Idk if I flared this correctly, sorry if I didn't.

Basically I always used the name "Norman" for myself, but recently decided to also use "Celeste" with new people in uni because 1. People tend to not take people with foreign names seriously if they don't "look" their gender 2. I just wanted a name that was more "coherent" with my language.

I found this name while searching a name for my oc and instantly liked it, however after some time I noticed it is mostly used for girls here and this situation is making me a bit anxious about it. There isn't any other italian guy name I like, so I doubt I'll ever try to find a new name, also because it's a pain to go to people you know and tell them "hey, I changed my name!!"; however it sometimes make me feel almost less valid and I don't know how to feel about this. I'm scared other people won't take my identity seriously like this (it hasn't happened for now).

I would not be opposed to changing it, but as I said, I find the act of communicating the change a little bit "embarassing", and to be completely honest I started quite liking this name because it's not that common and I like unique names.

What do you think I should do?

HYPOTHETICALLY if i was to like leave family and start t, what would be a good excuse to my voice deepening? I know inevitably im gonna have to come out but for safety i'll likely have to keep transphobic family involved in my life a little in the future, and i know you guys might need more context so here! Im a trans dude that unfortunately has to stay with unsupportive family for now and ive been hyperperforming femininity for them. They can't have ANY clue im trans and ive done a fantastic job of that. If they find out, i risk having all that support jerked out and i need them to keep this illusion im exactly what they want me to be for safety. I- in reality- am nowhere NEAR being a feminine guy hahah, but it helps me to imagine im a guy that got turned into a girl and has a excuse to do all the things girls do because hes been secretly turned into a girl by a witch or something and hes just enjoying his "girl" pass before he gets turned back. Completely off topic but y'know, just a fun fact. Back on topic, im thinking about going to college (or using it as a excuse and dipping) and im absolutely clueless as to how its gonna go if i call family and theyre gonna be like "WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR VOICE?!" im thinking maybe some bogus throat injury, or just going "im congested from the pollution in the air :(" but I NEED YOUR HELP GUYS!!!!! and first post on reddit yuhhhh

For the longest time I identified heavily as trans masc. My goal when I started T was to be perceived as amab nonbianary. Ive always identified as genderqueer, not trans. Even before T I felt very masculine already, and since starting I feel so confident in my masculinity I started dressing super femme for halloween costumes. Each one I'm dressing more and more femme and I actually love it so much. Like, I might start shaving and wearing makeup, presenting femme again. I'll still dress super masc sometimes too.

But I'm worried. What if I'm actually just a gender nonconforming and cis? And I end up regretting transition?

How do I know? I know theres no good answer. But like. Damn.
This is really confusing.

Also I might like men now???? Did T just make me a straight woman?????? (Bi technically but thats insane).

Does the donor site (hand/thigh) heal to look like before? If not, would you say methidoplasty (sorry if misspelled) has relatively similar results? Thank in advance!

Ill put a TW here because ill be talking about anatomy

Okay this may be a weird(?) question but like since we dont naturally have a penis doesnt it feel weird to walk around with a packer in your pants? I mean i know its euphoric for a lot of people but doesnt it feel like theres just something random in your pants, at least at first?

If anyone has felt like its really weird, does it go away?

Honestly im not personally that bothered by not having a penis, id moreso be getting a packer for the aesthetics of it since i wear a lot of sweats and like sports shorts. Im not sure if ill get one anyways but this has been a major reason i havent.

I started T at the end of February, and I haven’t noticed many changes. I have very little facial hair, my voice hasn’t gotten any deeper, my drive has definitely increased significantly, and i also have thicker eyebrows and hair on my butt now. That is it. Oh and my voice cracks now, but its not deeper. Can anyone else attest to their experience when facial hair really comes in or when their voice dropped.

Hi all,

Just wanted to ask what signs of pregnancy are while on T…I had unprotected sex recently and I am on birth control as well as T but just wondering I gusss because I’m paranoid. Realistically it’s super low chance that it happens bc of the birth control but also pretty much everyone in my family has fertility issues. I just wanna know in case something happens. Thank you!

My country only offers sustanon and I'm going to start 250mg 1ml every 3 weeks soon but every post I've seen about it is how shit it is. I'm getting a little worried and thinking it won't do anything. Will I still get the masculinization I want especially the voice drop? Ive heard it has intense peaks and drops but most people say it just feels shitty mentally and no one has said if you still get physical results from it. Is anyone on it? Did it stop your period and give you the other results associated with starting T?

Edit: thank you to everyone who responded, it really helped quell my fears and I am now as excited to start T as I was before all of the negative posts I saw about sustanon, I truly appreciate everyone on this sub as a lot of you have helped me in the past and even now

Nonbinary furry on T here. I have slight growth and I like treating my clit like a penis, but the sensitivity/positioning can mess with pleasure, especially longer sessions with my furry playmates.

anyone else had to tweak their strap-on setup (angles, padding, harness, etc.) because of growth? How do you keep it enjoyable without the discomfort killing the mood?

So I’ve always had and appreciated a lot of thick but soft curly/wavy hair, and the thought of balding on t kind of freaks me out, especially cause I’m going for more of an androgynous guy look and longer hair contributes to that. My dad is bald, but he got burned pretty bad when he was 19 so we’re not sure how that’s affected him, his side of the family does tend to bald to some extent though. My Mom’s side is the opposite and her dad has a full head of hair to this day. I know there are things to take to potentially stop balding I just wonder whether or not they’ll work?

I'm 2 months on T and my voice is noticably different, I think, but it hasn't totally dropped yet. I wasn't a fantastic singer to begin with, but I wasn't bad and I love some car karaoke, and I'm annoyed that I can't really sing anymore (which I obviously expected, but whatever). How long might it take for me to get back to my mediocre singing?

Additionally/alternatively, what exactly are all the stages that your voice goes through on T?

please, anyone able to help with beginning the process of getting top surgery referral after diagnosing/treatment. i had an appointment today with my primary care psychiatrist who i told basically im afab, and cool with that identity, but basically ever since my lesbian awakening (10 long years ago lol), ive been extremely uncomfortable with my chest. how id prefer a flat chest blah blah. anyway, he said basically that he would have to diagnose me with depression and that i was throwing around terms like gender dysphoria, and i need to talk to my primary care doctor. i have an appointment next week to talk to my Primary Care MD. any suggestions :) i'm at Kaiser in socal. Im 25 and will be removed from my parents insurance in august next year- i had to wait to go thru with the process because, unfortunately, initially my mom and i had different perspectives on the procedure, but we eventually came to a compromise that she would FULLY support my decision as long as i waited till i was 25. have HMO if it helps. rlly looking for any advice yall🥲

i’m planning on going to the netherlands over the summer for a study abroad program for my college. i live in a midwest mostly blue state in a red area, how will being in the netherlands compare to my current experience? should i be more or less scared on the streets by myself?

I turn 17 this month on the 9th and I've been wondering if I could potentially get top surgery at my age I live in NC and here you can't do any gender affirming care until your 18 (which sucks) I heard there might be a surgeons who could do it with parent consent but I'm not sure if that's true or not I don't know if it would be possible all I know is that I want this two parasites off my chest as soon as possible