I'm kinda grappling with the idea that I might be demi solely on the fact that I find it extremely hard to find "real" people attractive, like i won't have a problem feeling it towards a fictonal character or an actor if i like their precived personality but i feel like it could be explain through emotional attachment and build up that you get when watching a show. but at the same time I do have high libido, and i feel like it's kinda contradicting. So i was wondering if any of you experience something similar? Are you guys can experience libido outside a well astablish relationship? like only with yourself or with stories or characters that you made up?

Idk sorry if I don't make any sense...

Hello! I consider myself demisexual/demiromantic in that I only experience attraction after forming an emotional connection. I also have intermittent sex repulsion. However I'm confident this is due to cPTSD. Is there a place on reddit (or elsewhere on the internet) that people like me gather? I understand that the narrative of "I'm demisexual/asexual due to trauma" can be triggering to folks who are just born this way, so I don't know that this community would be the best one for me to post in. I want a space to explore the way that trauma impacted my sexuality and also the ways its changing as I heal. Does that already exist somewhere?

Out of respect to everyone involved I'm only going to provide the context that I feel is necessary. I'm currently in a long distance polyamorus relationship that consists of myself, my partner, and their partner ( who I will refer to as my metamour ) My side of the relationship did not start off sexual, as a demisexual ( and demiromantic) person it wasn't something I really desired until months later when our connection had deepened more. Our relationship became sexual after we met together in person last year, and it became something important to me. We had planned to continue exploring this together when I would next visit them.

However, a few days ago I was told that my metamour was no longer comfortable with us having a sexual relationship- possibly forever. Their reasoning was understandable, so I agreed to end that part of the relationship. I know I did the right thing, and my partner is doing everything they can to make it up to me and is being very attentive- however it all just hurts a lot. I feel like I have not just lost a part myself I was only just starting to learn about, but I now have to bury that part of myself that I don't know if I could ever have with anyone else. I just can't picture myself being sexual with anyone but them.

I'm not looking for any comments or criticisms about the situation, it's complicated and most of the information is just not mine to share. I'm looking for any advice on how to nurse this pain and grief. I'm going to be seeing my partner again soon in 2 months, we plan on moving in together in the future. I want to make this all work between all of us, but I'm very afraid of how much it's going to hurt when I see them knowing what I've lost. It doesn't help that this year has been very difficult for me, and this has just tanked my mental health further. Is there anything out there that we could do in place of sex that would soothe this pain?

I'm 25 demi male. And I took a 22 f on a friends date to the zoo. We met through Facebook dating and she said she was only really looking for friends. But in person she randomly told me she was single but keeps in relationship status on Facebook to confuse her friends. So does that mean she's open to dating? Idk

And she does know I'm Demi and I'm looking for long term relationship. Idk I'm terrible with hints

I basically like her as a person and that's attraction enough for me to know I want to date her. Sexual attraction isn't important to me but I'm sure that will likely come eventually anyway. have never been in a relationship or had sex. And I just really want to find my person now.

I basically want to know when is a good time to tell her I want to date her. Unfortunately I'm working away for 8 weeks so i can't take her on any dates right now. So is it a good idea to wait and ask if she would like to go on a date when I get back. Or do I tell her now. Or do I ask her on another friends date and tell her how I feel on that date in person.

I'm terrified I might mess it up just because of bad timing. Like she ends up finding someone else or I overshare and become less mysterious and attractive and get friend zoned again.

And yes I know there will be more people come along in the future, she isn't the first girl I've liked and asked out. And there will be more I know. I just want to know I'm doing it right and not ruining it by doing something stupid like waiting too long.

And should I ask her what she's looking for relationship wise first. She shares a lot of reels on insta about wanting a relationship, but then her dating bio said only really looking for friends. Idk

Hey guys

I’ve been reflecting a lot lately on how I experience attraction, but I'm feeling quite confused about it all. Please be understanding as I try to figure things out and share my thoughts!

Basically, I don't feel excited or feel physical arousal even when kissing someone, unless I've known them for a very long time and established a genuine connection first. Without that connection, physical intimacy just feels empty or neutral to me.

At the same time, I find it exhausting to go through the early stages of getting to know people through messaging just for the sake of dating. It takes so much time for me to even develop the desire to kiss someone, and texting feels boring when there's an expectation of quick romantic interest.

Does anyone else feel this way? How did you realize you were demisexual, and how do you navigate dating when getting to know people takes so much time?

I'd love to hear your experiences or thoughts!

I've only ever had a genuine crush on one of my friends, so these feelings are so unfamiliar to me. I have been close friends with this person for a couple years and there are things that make me feel like maybe I do like them, but on the other hand I don't? We have always been physically affectionate with each other like hugging and sitting close to each other which is pretty normal for someone I'm close with. I wouldn't really say I want to kiss them or do traditionally romantic things like that. Ig it's just the desire for physical closeness and there's like random small moments that make me nervous ???