r/bald • u/Ronin_Lionheart • 7h ago
Does the insecurity of being bald ever truly go away
I have been balding since my mid-30s. I was hiding it with hats and getting haircuts pretty regularly. During COVID, I shaved my head since the only person who saw me was my wife, and I wasn't crazy about it, so I let it grow back while secretly cutting the sides down to allow my crown to fill in. Earlier this year, I just got tired of running to the barbershop every two weeks, the endless algorithm of get a hair transplant or a toupee, try all sorts of remedies and products that I never really kept up with, hearing people's opinions on my hair, and worrying if my wife was going to leave me because I didn't have hair anymore (which she didn't she says she like me in all my baldness). This time it felt official I was trying my best to own it. The few people that have seen it have been really positive. The only people that are weird about it are my parents; they are like Why do you keep do shaving your head and trying this for it. So I still have to keep a hat on standby with them. So my question to the council does the insecurity of being bald ever truly go away?
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u/adumpsterfire13 Bald - Man 7h ago
I do not mean this in any way to be shitty but honestly you just plain straight up look better bald today than in the pics when you did have a whole head of hair.
Your parents are probably feeling extra old and projecting that onto you because they don’t want to admit they are old enough for their kid to be going bald.
Like you could be bald by choice and wouldn’t be doing yourself a disservice. You’ve just blossomed and self actualized.
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u/pseudoOhm 7h ago
My only insecurities come when I'm not freshly shaved and looking clean.
Right now I have fuzz because I've been sick and kinda lazy. When I finally get around to shaving again... I always look in the mirror and sigh relief.
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u/Neither-Speaker5510 Bald Watcher 🔭 7h ago
I actually think you look much better without the hair. You looked like a cartoon with longer frizzy hair and so generic with the fade haircut. Bald suits you a lot!
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u/adumpsterfire13 Bald - Man 7h ago
I agree. He straight up just should be bald even if he did have a choice.
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u/Baaabra 7h ago
Maybe it’s your antennae?
They look cute.
No reason to feel insecure…
For some reason thy only show in the first pic…?
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u/Ronin_Lionheart 7h ago
Lol why i didnt even realize I angled the cabniet handles that way.
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u/Baaabra 6h ago
😁
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u/SmoothNegotiation523 6h ago
Hey now, you rocked a face off Cesar you can’t act like you aren’t crazy enough to pull off bald.
https://giphy.com/gifs/WLQ3qRdHXAMlW
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u/Kitchen-Pie-265 7h ago
If you’re insecure about being bald, it might actually be that you’re uncomfortable with another part of your life. Because truly, you look handsome. Sometimes we feel insecure about how we look when we really are struggling with something else and we take it out on ourselves.
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u/BagNo7834 7h ago
This is 100% just a feeling of insecurity you’ve built. Your shaved head look is awesome, masculine, and makes you look like a boss instead of a kid. The only thing that sucks is that your parents don’t keep their opinion to themselves, it’s kinda weird that they tell you that and I suspect it has something to do with your mom still wanting you to be her little boy. The only style difference I notice is that your beard could be shaped up a little more…makes you look more put together. The button down collared shirt style looks good
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u/totally_new_here_man 7h ago
You look good dude. I can't promise you that your insecurities will go away, but I can tell you that I personally don't really have any. Most people are too worried about their own insecurities to notice your's, and people will value how you make them feel about themselves more than how you look. Tbh, idc if my hair grows out some and looks a lil unkept these days. Just rock a smile, say hello to people when they make eye contact, and compliment them on a personal choice they made that you like, like jewelry or their outfit, and people will love you
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u/710Filter 7h ago
It's like this. I don't care. It's just who I am. It has no affect on how people treat me and it to doesn't impact me in any way
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u/fenixmagic Support Committee 7h ago
There are much worse things to be than bald, my brother. Age will continue to rob us of the bodies we want-no one wants to look older, but the wrinkles, liver spots, crepe skin, and hair loss come anyways. Enjoy the youth you still have, and don’t let your bald look get you down. It looks great on you!
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u/rusty1066 7h ago
Better question: does the insecurity of GOING bald have her go away? You look fantastic? Embrace it!
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u/RogDawg76 7h ago
I'm sorry you're struggling. My insecurities about my head faded within days of shaving and were replaced with a sense of liberation and confidence. Bald is a great look on ya man, I hope you find acceptance and comfort soon.
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u/Stock_Dot_9632 7h ago
I was never insecure about it.... though for me it was a choice. I have a full head of hair and juat shaved it bald for almost 25 or 30 years... but I loved the look and feel from day 1.
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u/Chunderthunder305 7h ago
Lost my hair at 18. Sent me into a terrible depression spiral for years. Now, over a decade later, I love my bald head and never having to pay or make small talk at a hair cut appointment ever again is honestly amazing. It’s the little things that help make it go away, plus think of all the cool dudes / gals rocking bald these days. Shit Is dope
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u/WearyMatter 6h ago
My parents are shits about it too.
You look great imo. No need to be insecure. Keep working on it.
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u/ZOMBIFIEDEYEATER 7h ago
Do what makes you happy, don’t try to make other people happy. That’s all that matters. Walk proud and rock that bald head!
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u/Leading-Aide5617 7h ago
Yeah it does, and you look good my bald brother, there is nothing to worry about.
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u/OldDogTrainer 7h ago
Insecurity goes away, yes, but it’s not some magical switch. You build confidence like you build a house. One intentional brick or board at a time.
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u/TonyKiritsis83 7h ago
I had a conversation with a coworker today who asked if I’d ever get a hair transplant. To her surprise, I told her I’d rather spend that money on laser removal.
You’ll get there.
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u/Apprehensive_Panda14 7h ago
I personally thinks its a direct correlation between how long you try to hang on how bad the insecurity is for me it was only about 2 years and my barber was using all types of tricks to save it until one day he literally told me I don’t feel right charging you and literally gave me a baldy for free lol (he’s been chopping my hair for years)
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u/Catherine_the_Okay 7h ago
I’m a woman and I used to be a hairstylist; you look better bald. Honestly. Being bald is a look and you are pulling it off, big time. I really like the clear glasses too. Parents have a hard time with significant change, they’ll get over it. You’re a handsome dude. Embrace it.
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u/PanhandlersPets 7h ago
You look great. Being bald isn't the end of being a sexy dude. I joined this subreddit because I like bald heads and this subreddit is filled with people who are bald. I literally just joined to look at handsome baldies. So go out there with confidence you handsome baldie you.
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u/Waylandyr 7h ago
Lean into it, both in the way you think about it and approach it. Treat yourself to a barbershop deluxe head shave, get the full package. But yourself a good safety razor and shave soap/brush. Once you invest in it and start to think of it positively from these actions you'll love it.
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u/BigTall68 7h ago
There's nothing to be insecure about. Bald heads are so common nowadays, nobody's really gonna care if you're bald or not.
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u/GillyDaFish 7h ago
It went the other way for me - confidence went through the roof once i embraced the full shave
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u/FilteredRiddle 6h ago
I began taking clippers to my head in 2021? It started at a buzz cut with a decent guard, and now it’s no guard. I was extremely emotionally attached to my hair and thought I’d never get used to it, and now I don’t even think about it. If anything, I make jokes about needing a beanie in winter or the sun trying to bake my dome. I shave it back down every week or two and it’s just so easy. Eventually you’ll stop thinking about it. You could always find different hats you like and use that as a form of expression.
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u/Ronin_Lionheart 5h ago
Oh have plenty from when I was alway hiding it but If I have to go the office or something its always cold so there is that also.
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u/petewondrstone 6h ago
As soon as I got over, having a small wiener, I got over being bald. Genetic lottery.
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u/Rochy95 6h ago
You look great dude.
My one comment comes from your text… has your wife expressed concerns over your lack of hair? Also, if that’s such a big concern… have you tried asking her about it? She married you for a reason and I doubt it was because of your hair.
Anyway, welcome to Team Smooth, it’s much smoother for your self esteem over here. I’m now worried about when my hair grows out! It’ll all be fine, embracing it and being happy about it is masculine and attractive, so get on it.
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u/Ronin_Lionheart 2h ago
No she has been 110% supportive on this journey she said she loves me in my baldness even more from even when I had hair. I was just in my head thinking the worst.
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u/Creepy_Yam_7467 4h ago
Side note - is that a Rocco’s Modern Life button up?!
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u/CashMe_Outside2022 4h ago
Your shaved head looks freaking great. Listen to your wife who loves you regardless. She knows that bald head is hot af
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u/NoCaulNoShow 7h ago
What's does your father's hair look like? 🕵🏾♂️🤔
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u/giftopherz 6h ago
Once you realize, internalize and own how hot you look bald, you'll see the difference
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u/Expensive_Opening_92 6h ago
In all honesty I never had that level of insecurity. If my hair doesn’t want to be up there then I don’t want it there. I gave up a long time ago letting my hair rule over me. Sure I’ll grow it back out from time to time to see what’s left but I always end up shaving it all off. I mean… who am I fooling? I’ve been loosing hair since high school! I had friends sitting above me in the stands at the gym when I was 16 years old commenting on my hair loss. Damn I have enough pressure in my life as it is. The hair part is not gonna be tops on the list..
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u/captain_borgue 7h ago edited 7h ago
Yes, it does go away if you work on it. But you've spent a decade or so building that insecurity, it's not gonna come down in a week.
Cut yourself some slack, man. You'll get there, when you get there. Ain't no shortcuts.