r/askmanagers • u/horsegurl1969 • 18h ago
Laid off and former employer discussed my flaws in backchannel reference - do I contact them?
Went through the final round and one of my references from my former company informed me that during their conversation, they were asked about a flaw that someone at my former employer brought up. My reference tried to explain the circumstances behind this flaw but I’m spiraling. I know my other two references wouldn’t have mentioned this, as they had no experience with this flaw, so the prospective employer must have reached out to someone at my former company. It was likely the CEO.
Should I reach out and politely ask them to be balanced in any future conversations like this? My lay-off wasn’t performance-related and I mentioned this, but I’m afraid that they’ll ruin my reputation. My severance agreement included a non-disparagement clause but now I’m wishing that I fought to make it mutual.