I’ve been at my company for 3.5 years. My boss has always complimented my work ethic and being so organized. Last week during our sync, he even unprompted said I’ve come a long way and he’s noticed how much I have improved and loves how organized I am.

The next day, a client emailed me saying I made mistakes on his results. I had to get on a call with him and my boss and figure out what went wrong a month after I submitted the results.

A maybe important note is that when I submitted these results, my grandma had just died and I had come back from three days leave for her funeral. This is the only reason I can think I messed up so badly, in my grief.

Then today, my boss found another mistake I made a month ago after my grandma’s death. This has been a really tough year personally for me with other losses that my boss is aware of, but I’m not sure he will factor this in to why I made mistakes. He basically said he is now going to have to micromanage all my projects to make sure this never happens again.

Ive been working all night to fix everything because he said to have it ready first thing tomorrow for review. Do you think this is PIP worthy or a fireable offence? I offered to fix everything immediately before he asked and said I understand why he has me under a microscope now. He’s now questioning the validity of my projects from the past few months and I’m worried for my future.

Reddit you’ve always been great with advice so I need your help again!

I’ve recently been promoted to operations manager after being in a management position previously in the same company. I worked as an operations manager before so I was excited to get back to that role. In my company we work on a management team across a few departments. There are 5 of us in total and obviously with my role I’m working closely with all of them depending on the situation I’m dealing with at the time.
I report directly to the CEO.
When I first became a manager in this company I had an issue with one of the managers micromanaging me. I did bring it to the CEO as it got to the stage I felt like I was reporting to this manager as well and it did get better but it’s an uncomfortable situation because this manager is particularly close with the CEO.
Now that I’m in this job it’s starting again and it is driving me insane!!
I guess there is some small insecurities on my part I’m new to the operations role in this company so I know there is a learning curve but the core responsibilities of the role are the same as when I was previously an operations manager. I know how to do this job.
It started off with small things masked as “helping me” which I appreciated but it’s recently escalated into her actively getting involved in tasks I am currently working on.
A recent situation was to do with implementing a policy procedure (my job) this particular procedure had nothing do with her department in any shape or form.
I received an email from her while I was in the middle of drafting this, to show to the CEO, with a version that she had done herself. Im suspecting it was talked about between her and the CEO but it had absolutely nothing to do with her. I actually had to walk away from my PC before I sent her an email that would most definitely have gotten me fired.
I’m just so confused how to handle it this time the relationship she has with the CEO is making me hesitant to bring this is but I know if I don’t this is just going to escalate.

Has anyone any advice on how to handle this situation? I’m just so deflated about this situation because I was really excited about the role and now i feel like I’m stuck between and rock and hard place

I work for a large Fortune 100 corporation. In the 18 years I’ve worked there, every manager I have had has been…not good.

I have a few questions.

When you were made a manager, was it a requirement that you get any kind of training specifically about managing? If so, what was the training?

How much were you expected to know or understand about the actual work underneath you? Were you supposed to be able to understand and evaluate the work being done under you? Or were you allowed to just be a “people manager” and someone else handled the technical stuff?

Was there any turnover to you from previous managers? Is turning work over from one person who is moving off the role to the person taking it on considered important in your company? Is it done at all?

I’m just trying to figure out what is “normal” and what is just my company.

Hi everyone, so I am a 26(F) and started a job less than a month ago. I am an HR/ accounting assistant at a hotel and for the most part enjoy my coworkers.

There is one male coworker in his 40s, who is a salary position (banquet manager) and he is making me kinda uncomfortable. Since I’ve started, he’s touched my shoulder when I was wearing an off shoulder shirt (quickly apologized after but it seemed like an excuse) picked hair off my coat (I have a dog and I have dog fur on my coat but still). I wore lipstick one day and he noticed and said he loves the lipstick, and also (the worst) made an innuendo about his penis (I won’t get into exactly what he said). He also makes very intense eye contact and stands very close to me and it just weirds me out.

Anyways, he is making me uncomfortable and I’m not sure if this is normal behavior from male coworkers or not. I worked in a daycare for 3 years before this and worked with all females but he just creeps me out. I don’t wanna go to my supervisor because he is paid way more money than me, is more valuable and has been here since march, way longer than me. I don’t know if it’s even worth bringing up or if I’m just being stupid.

Basically we are using a new system that is supposed to make life easier when we are putting away physical resources. We’ve been doing this for about 2 weeks now and so far it’s great. The only problem is one person who can’t seem to understand basic math and putting things away in the wrong place. I’ve mentioned this to my manager as a “Hey, can you please have a chat with the team about putting things away correctly so we aren’t accusing one person in particular?” He has done that.

But despite this, a number of messages in teams and people reminding other people face to face this one person keeps fucking up. So I ask you managers of reddit how can I tell my manager of one person making this error daily without being seen as a difficult to work with?

Before you ask, yea it’s a big deal because if person A makes a mistake when putting things back it means other people are going to make the mistake as well or spend time fixing it.

and what kind of coach/mentor we should looking for?

I have an assignment for my management class where I need to interview a manager and write a paper. I would be more than grateful for responses from a manager! I've been reaching out to managers but have not had any luck yet. So here I am on Reddit.

I'll write out the questions below if you are interested. I need to make this as credible as possible so at the minimum I ask that you provide your name (first name only is fine), type of management/leadership role you hold and where you work. If you'd rather send me a DM that's fine too.

My assignment is due Nov. 1st and would like to get responses by Oct. 28th or sooner if possible. Thank you!

Questions:

1. What do you find rewarding about being a manager?

2. What education or training have helped you become a manager?

3. How has your management style changed over time?

4. What skills have you found most important in your work as a manager?

5. How do you communicate expectations to your team?

6. How do you keep employees engaged and motivated?

7. How do you manage conflicts between employees?

8. How do you build successful and productive teams?

9. How do you encourage employees to share their ideas or concerns?

10. What advice would you give to someone who wants to become a manager?

At what point does an internal application become visible to the applicant's current manager?

In this case, the application page says notification happens only after the applicant and hiring manager both decide to proceed. Would an informal conversation about the role count as proceeding, or could that happen before the current manager is told?

I'd want that clarified before scheduling a chat. For managers or internal candidates who've dealt with this, who gave you a reliable answer about the notification trigger? Also, how long did it take to hear back after applying?

Today was the worst day in my 7 years as a manager; one of my direct reports has filed a complaint with my campus Civil Rights Office alleging she is being unfairly targeted and singled out for her workplace attire by me. I have received multiple complaints about this person’s short skirts over my 2 years in this department. I have tried indirectly addressing it with reminders of the dress code, and directly with HR present as well as the union rep in person. As a result, an agreement was struck, which she didn’t adhere to, and now she’s complaining because I continue to point it out. I don’t feel like I’ve gotten adequate support from HR on this and that they’ve basically steered me wrong. I honestly would have looked the other way if I’d known she was going to be found in the right here. (The Civil Rights Office said today she is right and I’m wrong because the policy that I didn‘t even write is too vague.) I inherited this person and she asked me for a raise my second week on the job and continued to press the issue though her performance only meets expectations. People are exhausting.

Hi! I’m 1 year into my management role in healthcare, and my employer offers reimbursement to attend an annual conference in leadership skills or management.

I’ve done some online searching, but are there any quality / actually useful conferences of this type in the U.S. that I could benefit from attending?

If you’ve been to one & recommend it, please let me know! TIA :)

I hava a micro-manager, so I get really few valuable tasks or chances to develop. And whenever we have an intern, she gives my worthwhile work to them and puts me last.

For example, at company public events, someone needs to take photos. When I first volunteered, she refused by saying it was a major event with important guests and that she had high standards for the photos, and hired a professional photographer instead. Only when the photographer was unavailable did I get a chance, colleagues and guests were happy with my photos. Yet she still complains about the tight budget while hiring a photographer for every event.

But when there's an intern, she suddenly lets the intern shoot—even if they're not good at it. Her reason: interns are here to gain experience, so they can't keep doing simple, repetitive work. Even I'd told her in advance i will take photos for one event, and she'd conveniently forget and let the intern practice.

I think it's double standards and unfair, but I can't just refuse and say I don't want interns involved—that would make me the selfish, uncooperative one.

I don't dislike the interns or see them as rivals. I just don't understand why I keep feeling like my work is being taken away from me. If you've been through something similar, how would you handle it?

Went through the final round and one of my references from my former company informed me that during their conversation, they were asked about a flaw that someone at my former employer brought up. My reference tried to explain the circumstances behind this flaw but I’m spiraling. I know my other two references wouldn’t have mentioned this, as they had no experience with this flaw, so the prospective employer must have reached out to someone at my former company. It was likely the CEO.

Should I reach out and politely ask them to be balanced in any future conversations like this? My lay-off wasn’t performance-related and I mentioned this, but I’m afraid that they’ll ruin my reputation. My severance agreement included a non-disparagement clause but now I’m wishing that I fought to make it mutual.

I’m looking for perspectives from managers and HR professionals regarding production expectations, performance coaching, and employee development.
I work in a production-based role where employees are expected to meet certain monthly metrics. Our team completes assigned cases and tasks, and we submit our daily completion numbers to management.

Management then enters those numbers into a spreadsheet to calculate our individual production percentages.
Here’s where my concerns started.
Although we’re required to report completed work daily, we typically don’t receive our actual monthly production percentages until the middle of the following month.
This means employees may not know whether they’re meeting expectations until weeks after the work has already been completed.

During my 1-on-1 meetings, rather than discussing professional development, growth opportunities, or ways to improve efficiency, the conversations increasingly focused on not meeting production metrics. Follow-up emails were then sent documenting those discussions.
I understand the importance of accountability and performance expectations. However, I questioned how employees could proactively correct performance concerns without timely access to the numbers being used to evaluate them.
So I took the initiative myself.
As an individual contributor, I created a production spreadsheet to track my daily completed work and estimate my performance in real time.
This gave me visibility into where I stood throughout the month rather than waiting until the following month to find out.
Since implementing this approach, I’ve consistently tracked production above 100% for the past four months.
There’s also the issue of workload availability.
Our production depends heavily on assigned cases and specific tasks. Sometimes there simply isn’t enough available work to reach the expected production percentage.
When that concern was raised, management’s response was essentially that employees needed to find something else to do.
However, our team has defined responsibilities. We cannot create cases or generate additional work when there isn’t any available.
That raises a question for me: How should employee performance be assessed when production opportunities are limited by workload availability rather than employee effort?

Why say you'll never need sponsorship if you already know that answer isn't accurate?

That's the situation that frustrates me. But I'd want the person to explain an apparent inconsistency directly. Their school or current employer wouldn't be enough for me to decide what their sponsorship needs are.

Managers and recruiters: how do you phrase the follow-up, and at what point in hiring do you ask it? Have you found that applicants misread the question, or are you seeing answers change after an explicit conversation?

For applicants using application autofill to save time on repeated forms, this is one of the answers worth reviewing deliberately before submitting. Saving typing shouldn't mean guessing what a question means.

I work 9 hours a day 5 days a week and 6 hours all weekend. I work as a caregiver and I feel like my freedom is being stripped away needing to worry about other people I get no time to my self. I am 19 and they say work while your young but man this is exhausting.

I have been in my job for 7 months... right now things in my life are not well, everything is an issue and I feel like I'm wasting my time and energy when I could just... fuck off for a while and travel somewhere? My plan is to work abroad, make as much money as I can and then come back here to start some projects with a fresher mind and try to adress some of the issues I have in my personal life. The thing is that, I'm not willing to discuss my personal life, I *believe* that's pointless and would only bring me more issues, who gives a shit anyway... so I decided to tell them my father's surgery (real) requires me to be off work for 3 months (not 100% necessary).

At first my manager gave me the looks when I said I'd bring the documents like it's not necessary but before we finished the conversation she told me we need to provide a reason to see IF it's approved. I feel bad for not being fully honest but what the hell can I do? Also maybe there's the lingering thought I might be lying (3 months is a lot and everyone needs money) or maybe they might deny this time off to force me to leave the job in case they want me out if they now consider me unreliable.

Any advice? I don't even know why I'm posting this... well yh, they might realize the docs don't add up for a 3 months absence, though I can argue after care. And I'm not pointing a gun at them? I need the time off they are free to take whatever decision they want even if that means wanting me out, that's their decision.

What would YOU have done?

​

I’m currently working in a role where daily at the end-of-day (EOD) reports are shared by superior, and our performance is tracked through a ranking system. At the moment, I’m ranked at the bottom, partly because the tasks I’m handling are quite time-consuming.

Recently, when I was asked to explain why my output was lower, I struggled to communicate my reasons clearly. I was also compared to colleagues who are apparently managing the same work more efficiently. As a result, I feel I may have come across as unprepared, incapable, or not ready for greater responsibilities or a promotion.

I want to understand how to handle this situation professionally and improve the way I communicate my work. How can I demonstrate my capabilities to my senior, explain the time and effort my tasks require without sounding like I’m making excuses, and gradually improve my standing in the team? I want to come across as someone who takes ownership, is willing to improve, and is capable of handling more responsibility.

For anyone out there who’s had to let people go due to how much they cost, how are these analyses done?

Is there a certain salary range or type of employee that is generally ‘safe’ from these types of layoffs?

So I (mid-20s F) have worked for this company for well over a year now in a middle management position. I'm a high performer in a pretty full-on role and have a lot of experience behind me already which is to say that I've never been pulled up for any performance related issues before.

For the last 9 years of working in roles where my time is split pretty equally between desk-based computer work and running around the site to address issues, I have always sat at my chair in a way which comfiest and helps me focus.

A lot of the time this means I will sit with my legs crossed on the seat or with my feet tucked under myself which, yes, probably sounds strange but as a short-legged person with hypermobile joints, this has always been the best way of sitting which doesn't ruin my lower back, hips and knees. Also I fidget and move around a lot naturally so this isn't sustained for long amounts of time but I switch between these positions throughout the day.

Over 9 years this has never been a workplace issue apart from people occasionally asking me lightheartedly how it can be comfortable but this past week a senior manager (not my direct manager) has asked me twice to stop sitting cross-legged on my chair with no further explanation and I'm really confused about why this might be?

Yes - he is absolutely the type to pick at random things when he's in a shitty mood but once he locks in on something he won't drop it.

Yes - he takes pushback VERY badly and sees the question "why" as insubordination 🙄

No - we don't have a bad working relationship or any personal issues between us

No - there is no strict workplace policy/training/information about the best practice for sitting in a chair apart from DSE requirements

No - my job is not customer facing, my small team are undisturbed majority of the day and in a separate room from main offices

No - I don't wear a revealing uniform or in fact any clothing that would even suggest I'm a woman if picked out of a line-up 😂 I work in a factory so it's safety boots, jeans/cargos and large company-issued t-shirts & jumpers

So please, if anyone has any clues as to what exactly this manager is so irritated about? Am I missing something obvious?

I read at Microsoft, Satya, current CEO, he hire the psychologist who wrote the book Fixed and Growth mindset to train management to train their mindset to have growth mindset, like stop saying things that shows "fixed mindset" vibe

e.g. "This is not possible"

And they also pratice "reverse mentoring" which is where they let younger employess including new fresh grad sharing their opinions of xyz basically let less experienced employees mentor their boss lol.

So question is on the title, do comapnies often hire psychologist to train managements?

I work for a very large company which I will not share the name of. The past week I’ve had a lot of training and like to be as involved as I can. I recently got promoted to a manager position within my branch and have found some things difficult.

At training I like to be open and really listen to what my admin officials tell me. I was told that the training was an open space and was assured that we can speak freely. At one point during the training I mentioned that me and the other manager are usually the only people on time. I didn’t think anything of it I was just asking how I could approach a conversation with my employees about showing up at the correct time. A day went by and I went to another training so I was not at the branch. This morning I went in and one of my employees approached me and explained that she was very aggravated that I ratted her out at training for saying she was showing up late. She claimed I don’t have her back or have a team mentality which really hurt my feelings because 1. I felt blindsided by the person running the training and 2. I appeared to be a “snitch” to my employees.

I apologies to my employee that it came across that way and have been crying and feeling bad ever since.

Here’s how I’m feeling after the fact. I’m very aggregated that my higher up took advantage of what I was saying in training and used it against my branch before I had a chance to practice how to handle the situation. I’m also feeling trapped by a messed up corporate system that does not care for its employees. I also feel like my employees at my branch don’t have much respect for me anymore because of this because they see me as a snake when really I was trying to just be involved in the training. How am I supposed to learn as a manager and figure out my path and how I can have hard conversations with my employees if my higher ups went ahead and did it for me and also escalated it way worse than I would have????

I’m not sure what to do. I want to talk to HR about it but I also don’t know if I can trust them either. They all work with the person who was running my training very closely and I feel like they don’t have care for me in my workplace anymore.

I also don’t know how to talk to my employees about this without making myself look like a victim. I do have a problem with them showing up late to work and I do want to talk to them about it but now I can’t. I can’t even apologize because my apology looks like an excuse to them.

Please feel free to comment any ideas you might have to handling this situation.

My friend who doesn’t use reddit was complaining to me about this situation, and I felt the need to bring it here for some input, because WTF?

She (25F) works at a spa as a massage therapist and one of her job duties is cleaning the single-occupancy bathroom when it needs attention. She has a repeat client (26M) who comes in often (weekly or monthly idk) and every time without fail he goes to the restroom and leaves a sizable puddle of pee on the floor. That my friend then has to clean up.

This has been going on for at least a month if not longer. She has repeatedly brought the issue to her manager/s who, apparently, have deflected and said things to the effect of “well… we don’t know how to talk to him about this”.

Is this weird or not weird? If it’s happening consistently is this something a business would normally talk to a patron about? It’s my opinion that it should at least be ADDRESSED by management in some capacity. What that looks like is a matter of policy but I find it really strange that my friend is having to deal with this.

The only thing I can think of besides him being a weirdo doing this on purpose is that it’s some kind of disability issue which I suppose can’t be helped. But I’m not aware of any such condition.

TLDR: 25F massage therapist dealing with 26M client who keeps peeing on the floor and management doesn’t seem to see it as a serious problem

I am a new manager ~5mos. I have three direct report supervisors, two interns that I directly supervise on a special project, and 17 people who report to my supervisors. Two supervisors are solid. I check in weekly, provide feedback, give recommendations, back them up when needed to upper management, and I can rely on them to manage their teams, follow-through with tasking in a timely manner, keep me informed of emergent issues, and run their programs.

Then there is the supervisor who was not selected for my position. He has presented a challenge from our first 1:1 onward. He requires multiple reminders to accomplish tasks, does not effectively relay my direction to his teams, does not hold his reports accountable (doesn't like to micromanage), and just doesn't put much effort into his tasks or teams. I honestly get the vibe that he is collecting a paycheck while he builds his qualifications until a better job becomes available.

I was under the impression that he had an alternative work schedule arrangement because he has shown up between 2-4 hours late for years and theoretically works late every day, but I recently learned that no such arrangement exists between him and upper management/HR. His teams invariably come to me because while I could leverage telework and the "touch the desk" policy for salaried employees, I show up every day for the full business day and am therefore available when he is nowhere to be found. Between his work from home day and alternative schedule, he is only in office for about 24 hours per week.

I acknowledge that I have failed to effectively hold him accountable for this behavior while onboarding. I was trying to be sensitive to the fact that he was not selected for management and leaned too hard into a gentle approach with verbal coaching and feedback, but I'm at a point where I'm having to manage around him instead of through him and check in with his teams to ensure that they received clear direction aligned with my instructions. They usually haven't or their direction as communicated by him comes out like a game of telephone, resulting in confusion and delay. I set up a weekly agenda for our 1:1s to give him a reference point for our discussions and add his inputs to my own. He doesn't seem to use it or reference it and fails to follow through. At most, he adds one discussion point while his programs aren't meeting minimum deliverables. I didn't create a paper trail to document this behavior early on because I was hopeful that I could turn it around and I was/am still trying to get a handle of all of the programs and my role.

Example: Quarterly impact reports were due this week. The report changed to another spreadsheet in a different file location. I communicated the change, sent the new file location I two separate emails, and followed up in our weekly meeting last Friday when the wrong spreadsheet was being populated by his staff, including the link one last time. I returned from my first PTO in six months to find that his teams had still used the wrong spreadsheet and that they were unaware of the change.

At my wits end, I finally confided with upper management that I was struggling with him and was informed that this was a known pattern and that I should have been debriefed on the situation in advance of assuming my position. It was also recommended that I phrase my evaluation feedback in a supportive, coaching manner and not come down too hard on him. Fair enough, I didn't effectively create a paper trail to support the review that I want to provide, but I'm struggling to provide positive feedback at all because my job would honestly be easier if he wasn't there (which he often isn't).

His performance evaluation is on Friday. I sent him the self-assessment form on 9/11 and requested it by 9/22 for a debrief on 9/28. I followed up in weekly meetings to remind him and ask if he had any questions or concerns. None noted, but he hadn't done them by debrief day, so I told him that we would need to reschedule and reiterated that I needed a week of lead time to prepare my inputs once his assessment was complete. He missed the deadline and sent the inputs last night, giving me two business days to prepare.

So here I am, debating on whether to provide a tepid evaluation followed by a candid debrief, or to once more try to bring him onto the team with a slightly more positive tone while starting the process of documentation. This is my biggest pain point, I know that I have made mistakes along the way, but I need this supervisor to step up or move on.

I’ve been leading functional and technical teams in corporate environments for years, and lately, the weight of middle management feels heavier than ever. Maybe it's the burning state of the world and everyone is on edge.
My leadership style has always been servant leadership and about protecting my team: shielding them from arbitrary deadlines, the constant update culture, blocking unreasonable requests from senior management and giving them the space to do great work. But being that human shock-absorber takes a massive emotional toll. Upper management expects you to play the corporate game and force your team into superficial social expectations, while your team relies on you to keep the workplace sane. This is a hard balance to strike.

As a late-diagnosed AuDHD leader, navigating corporate politics and forced social masking often feels like wearing a one ton suit of armor every single day. In the days that I'm in the office 90% of my energy goes on managing egos and emotional collateral, leaving zero energy for actual strategic work or my own well-being.

I’ve reached a point where I’m heavily taking my neurodivergence into account and redesigning how leadership can function without requiring managers to burn out or sacrifice their integrity to corporate games.

I’m currently connecting with other team leads, managers, and directors with AuDHD who are caught in this middle-management crossfire to exchange experiences and map out better boundary setting strategies. If you’re a manager dealing with this tension, I’d love to have a brief 20 min peer-to-peer chat to hear how you’re navigating it.

Send me a DM if you're open to connecting! Thanks in advance.