Listen, me no like smex or romance.

But women.

((I just like leaning towards women in other forms. Also I managed to hide everything as welll, thank you everyone that helped! :D))

Hello! First time poster here.

I’ve managed to reach the conclusion that im either Demi AroAce, Oriented AroAce, or just socially akward af.

I’ve never found myself relating to the people around me when they’re all like “OMG he’s/she’s/they’re so hot”, perpetually dating and breaking up with people, and when anything romantic is shown either in any form of media I immediately just go “ewww” and look away and try not to puke, but I very rarely (like once in a blue moon type event) form romantic feelings for someone and what’s even more is that I’m just socially akward af in general because of AuDHd so that also impacts on how I interact with and view people.

And just thinking about it, what even is the difference between DemiAroAce and Oriented AroAce? Like aren’t they kinda the same thing?

Edit: after looking at the FAQ post, I’ve also realised some extra bits:
- I don’t really want to be in/ care about a relationship

-when my friends point at a conventionally attractive
person n are like “OMG they’re so hot”, i can see why they’re like that, but I kinda just…don’t care

-same when i see them get into relationships, i just don’t care and am like “good for you”

-Ive gone down the pipe of Asexual -> Biromantic asexual-> AroAce

-When I talk to people in general im usually extroverted, but when it comes to love/relationships im insanely introverted and am like “idk what my type is i’ll just love whoever falls into my arms”

-I often find myself aesthetically interested in men like Arthur Morgan and MGS3 Snake, like I just think they look “hot” (cool is more accurate imo) but I don’t wanna be with them like romantically

-When I listen to songs about love I always take them platonically instead of romantically

Thank you for any advice/responses in advance!

Bro, sí no le han dicho a sus padres que son aroaces van a entender esto. Porque mi mamá me jode con el "novio" o "besos al novio" y eso me incomoda un poco. O de "hijos" cuando soy asexual también. Sinceramente prefiero los perros y gatos, porque son fieles y te quieren, no como un hijo puede odiarte.

Hello, it’s my friend’s 21st birthday soon. She’s a huge bookworm and often shares her frustrations about there not being any good aromantic, asexual, or aroace representation in the books she reads. I was wondering if anyone knows of any books that fit this criteria:
-NOT ROMANCE FOCUSED (fine it’s just part of the story but not specifically a romance book)
-Preferably YA/fantasy genre (her fav authors are Naomi Novik, and Lynette Noni)

In my research I found This Golden Flame by Emily Victoria, and Wander the Night by Sydney Cobb.

Any recommendations would be amazing, or if you’ve read either of these, could you tell me what you thought/ if you’d recommend them. I’d really appreciate your help.

Recently this has come to mind since a friend of mine has begun dating someone. It especially feels weird since I've only known one person who was in a romantic relationship, but I didn't feel as weirded out and uncomfortable.

A bit of background context, I have identified as aroace for ~1 year straight, but it's been on and off for the past 3-4 years. To be blunt, I'd absolutely hate to be in a romantic and/or sexual relationship. I also suspect I might be neurodivergent, but have yet to recieve a diagnosis.

Now, on to what's causing this conversation. A recently made friend (it's been around 3 months since I first met him) started dating someone recently, and when he told me, I got extremely uncomfortable and maybe even upset. I don't understand why I felt this way, but I know that I want to stay entirely out of the love talk.

About a year ago, someone I knew for ~4-6 years, got a partner. I will admit I (and several other people) were a bit suspicious of his date, thinking he was just lying for clout. Though, later on, I started helping him with his dating troubles, which I was content with.

The thing is I just don't understand what the difference is and why I don't feel comfortable sometimes and do other times. Is it just the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships that change things? Something else?

Thanks if you read this, and especially if you reply. :)

Hey, im not aroace but I feel like this is the only community that would get it honestly.

I Love my friends too much, especially best friends. i end up making such deep bonds that it fulfills for me any need of a romantic relationship, even without any of the romantic stuff envolved. I put them so high up in priority that it feels what society expects of a romantic relationship; wanting to move in togheter, talking daily, wanting the family to meet eachother, hell i'd adopt a kid even with them. the problem is that a romantic partner eventually arives, and i am no longer their number one, and all that planning and dedicated time vanishes. dont get me wrong, i know is normal for people to go down that path in life with a romantic partner, and in the end no matter how much pain it causes me, i just want them to be happy, even if it means i will be a minor role.

But it leaves me with something similar to a heartache, like a breakup, it wrecks me to my core. and i feel so helpless looking at the future, knowing it will happen again and again and that i probably will end up in a lonely apartment. do any of you have a similar feeling? how can i help it? it fills me with so much dread.

I haven't ever experienced sexual attraction, romantic attraction yes but the moment it's reciprocated I lose interest and become uncomfortable

Even when my friends show a bit too much intrest and care for me i become uncomfortable.

I value friendship over love , partially because I think friendship is love

I can't differentiate between platonic and romantic feelings

I would be okay with not having a relationship but i really want a good emotional companionship

About physical stuff i was sa'ed so I don't know if it's because I associate touch with bad things or im just ikd

Also ever since I was like 4 I've been telling everyone I don't ever wanna get married

Help girl help

My bf of two years, has not had sex with me in a year. We’ve only had sex once and in his defense he is up there in age (60’s) but it’s suspicious. The last time we were supposed to have sex he couldn’t get it up so he asked me to get the dildo that we had purchased for nights like that and somehow it ended up getting used on him. He enjoyed it and came and it honestly didn’t feel like his first time because the dildo was 7 inches and thick and he did protest or wince, not even once. I need your expertise on how to get him comfortable enough to just tell me. We love each other so I wouldn’t leave him but that also would be the end of any potential sexual activity since I would never want to have sex with a man that has sex with men. I see him as a life partner but maybe in a polyandry kind of way.

I need your help, there has to be a way to find out.