If someone told you that their occupation is being a podcaster on YouTube or they are a influencer on social media, will you be turned off by that?

25M here who meets everyone I date through the apps. Keep getting ghosted and have almost never made it to the second date. Dont know what’s wrong because I get ghosted. I feel hopeless and don’t know if this is normal or not. I don’t wanna be in genuine on first dates and just focus on having a good time and getting to know the other person. The vast majority of my dates last for hours and the girl wants to hit multiple places too which feels like it means I am doing something right only for me to always get ghosted the next morning

I'm a 29 year old guy.

So a few months ago, after exhausting all local options, I decided that I need to go long distance to find someone. I dont expect this to be easy, but Im not sure if what I am doing is setting me up to have a chance.

I have 2 questions.

1. How do you meet people long distance?

Currently I have a hinge set to cities that I can reasonably travel to a few times a year, and that have women who are what I am looking for. I have my first prompt saying that I don't live there, am looking for something long distance and am willing to travel. Unsurprisingly, I am not getting any attention. Is there a better way to do this?

1. How do you build a connection long distance? I struggle with maintaining relationships and friendships when I am not able to be with them often as it is. Lets say I do meet a girl, how do I date long distance, build a connection, and really get to know her and trust her when I can only see her a few times a year. Phones exist, but they arent real and people can fake phone calls.

Thanks everyone.

I came across someone's Tinder stats:

• 53,099 profiles viewed
• 20,372 right swipes
• 118 conversations
• Only 36 conversations lasting more than 5 messages

That's roughly 173 right swipes per conversation, or 566 per conversation that makes it past 5 messages.

At that point, does it even make sense to spend time looking at photos, reading bios, and deciding whether you're interested? Wouldn't it be more rational to swipe right almost indiscriminately and only evaluate someone's profile after matching?

Why spend time carefully choosing among thousands of people when over 99% of those choices won't even lead to a conversation?

What am I missing?

Genuine question, what’s going on with Tinder. My match range is 25-49 at a distance of 50 miles. I live in a city with 3 million people. I recently turned off the show people further away feature and no what I get is 3-5 profiles every couple of hours then nothing shows. I’ll close the app and check it maybe an hour later to find one or two people to swipe on then nothing again. Is this app dead or something? There is no way I have swiped through every single available woman and non binary person within my age and distance settings. This is a big fricken city with a lot of smaller incorporated cities around it. 50 miles is half way through the next major city south of me on the highway. It’s been like this ever since you could filter people by interests like Thrill Seekers or Music Enjoys and replaced it with the Group Hangouts.

I (24F) met a great guy online. We exchanged numbers and texted for a week leading up to our first date.

He made reservations, dressed up, and told me which parking lot to park in. We had a lovely stroll, a great dinner, and he showered me with compliments. It was the best first date I've ever been on. We had so much in common, were in similar places in our lives, had similar relationship goals; it seemed really perfect. I have never felt a connection like this.

The night ended with a kiss. He told me to text him when I got home, which I did. I told him I had a nice time and he texted saying he's glad I got home safe. He told me to have a good night, and I liked the messages the next morning cause when I got home from the date I sort of passed out.

I expected to hear from him over the weekend, but it was radio silence. Which was odd because we were texting so frequently before. I thought it was cause we both wanted something more casual and tried not to think about it too much. I asked my sister and she said I fucked up by not texting him and just liking the message instead. I feel like such an idiot. I sent another text but haven't heard back.

Did I fuck up?

I, 22m, matched with an older woman (early 40s) on tinder the other day and we’re meeting on Friday. Our conversation made it clear this will be for sex and not a date.

I’ve always had a thing for milfs so I’m really excited, but at the same time, a little concerned. I’ve never met this woman and I’m immediately going to her house to fuck.

I found her Instagram and she seems like a real person and similar to her tinder photos. This might sound dumb, but should I realistically worry about her being a murderer or something 🤣? I’m going at 9pm (I suggested the time).

I can be a little awkward and don’t want to fumble over a phone call, and she doesn’t seem interested in meeting at a bar or anything beforehand. Is there anything else I can/should do before we meet?

EDIT: with all due respect, I’d appreciate it if yall could please help with my actual question here and stop asking why I want to do it in the first place, etc etc

Hey mates! I have a Samsung S24U & a Iphone 14 Pro Max. I was on FB dating, having a great convo with a girl, we have a LOT in common & she gave me her number. When I text her with my Samsung(primary phone) she just blocked me on the spot! I never knew I can get disqualified by owning an Android. To think of it, this happened twice before.

What did I do wrong?

Why do people today treat Android as a bad thing, inferior, or being broke? SMH

A couple years ago while I was dating my ex at the time, I had a female patient that came to see me for treatment for a couple months. I thought she was cute and I could tell that she liked me but I never acted on it since I was in a relationship and didnt wanna cross any boundaries with her being my patient. However, two years have passed since we’ve last seen each other and now that I’m single I thought maybe I can reconnect with her. I found her on FB and she accepted my friend request. I message her and we instantly hit it off. We were flirting, established that we were both single, and we followed each other on Instagram. I gave her my number thinking we can talk more off of FB Messenger and to set something up to see each other but she ghosted me after that. It’s been a couple days since she left me on read so I’m just really confused on what happened? Did giving her my number make her feel uncomfortable despite being flirtatious and having met multiple times before? Would love to hear some thoughts and any advice I can take moving forward!

Guys you have an issue when I go on first date with a girl, everytime it feels like I can make them laugh have them having fun and good time however I get hit with the no feeling spark.x for example today’s date seemed to be having fun then when the date ended it’s like she was hesitant to give hug and I had to give her the hug it felt like wasn’t keen on it but as soon as she got back she sent a text to thank me

I’m wondering perhaps I’m building attraction the wrong way though I do compliment and flirt with her and try if it allows to be natural to break touch barrier however it’s almost like deep inside I can sense that these girls are just being polite or just tolerating me and they don’t truly have that desire for me. Maybe it’s the stuff I’m talking about we talk a lot about each other our lives whilst I try keep the convo light hearted in getting to know and such today’s date was laughing a lot for example we got food and went to arcade.

So during a date is the men expected to just guess if the woman is feeling him to go for things like kissing or hand holding or you just take your shot even if it looks like she’s truly not even into you much not even complimenting you?

Are there any dating apps for people with physical deformities/disfigurements, whether its on their face or other parts of their body?

I feel like dating would be much easier if I could meet people who are on a similar level of attractiveness as me, rather than feeling like most people are in a completely different league. I also think it would be easier to relate to people who have had similar experiences.

Using normal dating apps feels pointless when everyone seems way too attractive to even consider someone like me. I might not have any visible deformities on my face, but I have disfigurements on parts of my body that are usually covered by clothes, and they make me feel very unattractive.

I'd like to meet someone who can relate to my situation, where we could understand each other's struggles and physical appearance wouldn't be such a big hurdle from the start.

Is there any kind of dating app that match this idea? I feel it would be helpfull for people like me with deformities.

I might get some hate for this, but I need some outside input. For context, I am in my late 30s looking at men around my age. If I find a profile that is great otherwise, if it says they live in an area/town that I know is low income or ghetto, I will swipe left. Am I being too shallow?

Hi, silly question, but is there a specific reason why women on Tinder look so much better than the women I’m getting recommended on other dating apps?

Maybe it’s the algorithm, but I got Tinder for the first time after being on Hinge and the other apps, and even with no filters or anything, the women are absolute rockets 🚀 lmao

Also, from the ladies’ perspective, do you also find better profiles / matches on tinder or did you have more success on other app?

I had a 2nd date today with a guy I have been talking to for about 3 weeks. We went to an arcade and went out to eat. We were having so much and I was feeling very attracted to him and very comfortable. While we were eating, he asked me what I was doing the rest of the night and tomorrow and I said that I didn't have any plans and he said he had to do an assessment for a job he applied to.

I thought he asked me because he wanted to continue the date so I asked him if he wanted to watch a movie back at my place and he said he would love to. My plans was movie, cuddles and making out, nothing further than that. Once we got to my apartment complex, he said he was gonna go home and do the assessment for his work. I was very disappointed but still decided to give him a brief kiss on the lips and he kissed me back. About an hour later, i texted him to thank him for the date and was hopeful he got home safely and he hasn't text me back and it's been over an hour since I sent the text. I feel that I ruined it by inviting him over and maybe he is not interested anymore. I am so sad cuz I havent liked someone like this in years. Do you guys think it was because I invited him over?

I turn 40 soon. Bumble lifetime subscription several months ago was totally worth it. Should I pay for everything else to get more exposure to take advantage of being in my 30s? I also want to have children so. I guess I should?

So I'm in a bit of a drought and struggling to find a decent dating website for Kinky people and need some advice from the wonderful reddit fam.

I've tried using the basic dating apps, Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, OKC, POF but don't really get anywhere there.

I am poly but really focusing on the kink side now not just poly. Currently I'm single, and hetrosexual.

On the fetish side of things Feeld is a hot mess - I hardly get matches, and a large number of profiles want couples only and or a unicorn, and a good number are just poly/wanting threesomes not kinky.

Tried Fet/Fetish.com (Purple/green claw heart icon) - Used to be pretty ok, though that's become a cesspool of pay (£16+) to message, they have a swipe feature which has gone down to like 7 swipes and you're out of swipes, or you can't message because you need to be premium/this person is too popular.

Fetlife - I'm on there, though really don't vibe with that as a dating app, I use it more like a kinky Facebook... Similar thing of I've put posts on there under seeking/classifieds pages but no dice. I occasionally get one or two likes but from guys (which obviously I don't really want to date)

Please help 😄

EDIT: Thanks for the answers, I've done a post on the BDSM personals sub, checked nymph again which has improved (more people in my area within my parameters) and will nuke my feeld page soon to redo it.

Once both parties agree that there’s mutual interest and want to meet, what’s the problem with stating when you’re free? I’m always curious about this. When discussing plans to meetup with women, I’ll mention a day or time, and they reply that they’re busy that day, and don’t suggest any alternatives. Why is that? Kinda perplexes me 😂😂

I met a girl on Bumble back in July; we hit it off pretty quickly—video chatting, texting, playing online games—and everything was going well, but whenever I asked her out, something would always come up to prevent it.

Just when it finally looked like we were going to meet up for coffee, she messaged me 30 minutes beforehand to say she was sorry but couldn't make it. She explained that she’d gone through some rough stuff and was afraid to go out; she said she wanted to keep talking to me but would understand if I didn't want to. I (like an idiot) said I cared about her but wasn't willing to wait around, and that she was free to look for someone else if she wanted. She replied that she didn't want to look for anyone else at the moment and would have liked to keep talking, but just didn't feel ready to go out. Things ended with me saying that if we were both single in the future, we could give it another shot.

It’s been a month and a half since then, and I’ve realized I probably messed up. She’s a girl I really clicked with—beautiful and fun—and I’ve realized I miss her a lot.

Would I be an idiot if I messaged her to apologize and tell her I miss her?

Divorced. I don’t plan on ever getting married again. I know there are people that are the opposite. I’m wondering is that like a first date disclosure? Do I need to put that on my profile? I’m newer on the apps and getting matches and talking to a few people. And that’s just in the back of my mind.

I’m 30F got sick age 15 and have been illl everyday since then so I’ve never dated, spoke to people here and there but not gotten to an actual date. Also, obviously no kiss/intimacy. I am chronically ill, have a bunch of things but my main disability is Moderate/Severe ME/cfs and POTS. I’m also autistic/adhd which adds challenges with socialising/communication. I’m told i’m attractive but that doesn’t mean anything

I think it’s my autistic black and white thinking that has led me to believe that no one will ever date me due to my health and sick people shouldn’t be dating anyways. My health really does impact my level of functioning but this is unlikely to ever change in the future. So am i/should i stay single forever or is it possible to find someone?

By the way, I do want someone to love and be loved and have intimacy and companionship but i don’t think it’s possible with my health

Just looking for advice on this. I’m 21f and I’m 80kg (5’6), so not obese at my hight but definitely visibly overweight. I’ve chosen pics I like of course but I’ve tried to use ones that show me realistically and I included a full body one. Should I at some point bring up weight with my matches to make it clear I’m a bigger girl or should I just assume they know?

I saw this lady over three weeks ago. Date went great, about 5 hrs, and we had been hitting it off super well over text. Due to schedule constraints, she wasn't able to meet until yesterday (Sat). I tried to get her to do a Facetime in the meantime and she agreed, but backed out of it due to getting busy with work. Even on Wed of this week, we had like an hr long back and forth texting convo. Friday night she messages me and tells me she was sick because of getting flu shot and profusely apologized for having to cancel. I was annoyed because we had this scheduled so far in advance and in my experience, women use "getting sick" as an excuse to back out of dates. It's also very disrespectful of my time to cancel. But I want to give her the benefit of the doubt. I asked her to let me know when she would want to reschedule and shd said next weekend. I told her to name the time and I'll make it work and...I've just heard nothing. Didn't even read my message yet after like 40 hours. I know she isn't bed ridden sick because she was posting pictures of her dog on IG.

Should I just cut it off at this point?

I (22m), liked a girl on hinge in August 2025. She matched with me in September 2025, and frankly, I was bad at communicating and messaged her one time on October 3, 2025.

She never responded to the message until October 4, 2026.

We had a very bland conversation tbh, but she’s really hot and I figure I might as well respond in case something actually could come of it (I’m in no need to have a serious relationship with her).

Any ideas on something I can say in a sort of funny way to acknowledge the gap?

I’m in my early 30s, and I know some people my age feel a lot of pressure around having kids within a certain timeline. I honestly don’t, at all.
I don’t want to close the door on having children. If I meet the right person and kids happen to be part of our future, I’d be happy with that. But I’m also not dating with a “I need to have kids by X age” mindset, and I don’t feel like motherhood is something I need to force into my life if it isn’t meant for me. I’m more of the mentality of, if it feels right or it’s meant to happen, then it does.
My question is more about how men interpret the Tinder label. Since Tinder only gives me “wants kids,” I’m wondering if having that on my profile makes it sound like I’m dead set on having children or working against a biological clock.
Would you interpret “wants kids” that strongly, or simply as someone who would like children with the right person?
I may be overthinking it, but I’m curious how other people read that label- if at all