I have always been good at gifts, even as a little girl my mum would ask me what to get for grandparents, since I picked up on little stuff. I see a lot of veryyy general questions here with not much more info than gender and age. There are no personal gifts that are only based on gender and age. I figured I would make a little guide with examples to keep in mind throughout the year so you dont have to scramble last minute. Pick a category you think is appropriate for the relationship and just pay attention to these things.
Gifts create feelings beyond just "loved" and "celebrated", its good to consider what specific feeling you want to achieve, like being seen and heard, having your interests understood, feeling supported about insecurities, feeling appreciated for unseen actions, etc.
Category 1: Practical gifts (feeling supported, seen and improving comfort)
- note down things your person complains about (even in small ways, like an "ugh" or regular procrastination) or often asks help for. See if you can fix this for them. I got my roommates girlfriend a sturdy stepstool so she could reach the top shelf without help. Besides practicality, it let her know she is welcome and she is not just a guest here.
Other examples can be: complaining about backpain when cooking (worksurface too high/low = stepping box or heightened cutting board) or always running around to find the laptop charging cable (gift extras for the main rooms of the house so its always there)
Category 2: based on throw away comments (feeling heard and understood)
- note down anything they off handedly mention they like or miss. I once got a whole box of specific snack item cuz I once mentioned not being allowed them as a kid and always being jealous of the others, but still hadnt tried them as an adult.
Other examples are: nice editions of favourite childrens books, classes to something "theyve always wanted to learn" or think looks cool, trips to special places, new versions of something that broke, like special mugs.
The more offhanded, the more special. If someone straight up asks for a trip to paris, go for it, but the goal here is the "omg you remembered!!" Face.
Category 3: out of reach luxury group gifts (feeling like a valued part of a community)
Think of ways to give the person the thing they outright want but could never afford. I once got all my friends family and friends together to chip in for a week of holiday she could never take. The trade off here is that she only got 1 singular present, but it is a real wow moment, not only because its valuable money wise but also because it takes time and effort to organise and the person knows that.
I would recommend setting up a digital group card for this too, so everyone can write a personal message.
Category 4: homemade (feeling like they are worth other peoples time, feeling heard and understood)
I don't believe this one is restricted to children and artists. Learning a skill for someone feels special and makes them feel like they are worth your time. It doesnt have to be artistic. Learn to perfectly cook whatever their fav dish from grandma was, get them out of the house and wallpaper that wall theyve had the paper for for 3 years but never get to it, make a bunch of funny and heartwarming picture edits to display on their fancy framed tv, sow pillow cases that perfectly fit the colour theme that they could never find in stores, learn their language and translate your wedding vows to them on a nice print, etc.
Hopefully this helps people who see themselves as terrible gift givers get in the right frame of mind. Your problem isnt that you dont know them or cant think of anything, your problem is viewing thinking of gifts as a once a year activity instead of as an ongoing project.