So Iāve recently started seeing a girl called Lucy. Sheās lovely, really attractive, good job, her own flat. Weāve been together about three weeks and things have been going pretty well.
Her name obviously caught my attention initially. Lucy. Lucia. I donāt really believe in coincidences, especially ones that significant.
Only slight issue is sheās not really into gaming.
Which is absolutely fine. Everyone has different interests. Iāve shown her the GTA 6 trailers a few times now and she says they look good, although she still struggles to identify Jason. Even when I pause it and point him out.
Iām trying to be patient.
The bigger issue is sheās just not particularly cool under pressure.
Last weekend she got quite flustered trying to reverse into a parking space outside Nandoās. I didnāt say anything initially, but after her third attempt I quietly asked, āAre you a professional?ā
She got annoyed and said āOF COURSE IāM A PROFESSIONAL. I WORK IN HR.ā
I explained thatās not really what I meant.
Sheās brought it up several times since, which seems unnecessary.
Similar thing happened in Tesco on Tuesday. We were walking down the frozen food aisle when I leaned over and whispered, āWe need to get out of here.ā
She asked why.
I said āJust trust me.ā
She said we hadnāt paid and still needed dishwasher tablets.
I donāt expect her to be Lucia, obviously, but a little spontaneity wouldnāt hurt.
Iāve also started saying ātrustā whenever she leaves the room. Just quietly, in Jasonās voice. I think itās a nice way of reinforcing our connection.
Initially she thought it was sweet, but sheās become increasingly hostile about it.
Yesterday she got up to use the toilet and I said ātrust.ā
She shouted āCAN YOU PLEASE STOP DOING THAT?ā
Which is a strange reaction to someone expressing trust.
There was another slightly awkward moment when I introduced her to a friend as Lucia.
She immediately corrected me.
I laughed it off, but she was genuinely annoyed. Her actual name is Lucy, so weāre talking about two additional letters. Hardly a complete personality change.
Anyway, Iāve been trying to make more of an effort romantically, so I bought her a really nice ankle bracelet.
Itās got a built-in GPS tracker, which I thought was a thoughtful touch. Obviously Iām not suggesting she needs monitoring, but if weāre going to be spending more time together it makes sense to know where we both are.
She asked why Iād bought her an electronic tag.
I explained itās an ankle bracelet. The tracking functionality is just an additional feature.
She asked whether Iād already connected it to my phone.
I said yes, but only to check it worked.
That turned into quite a big argument.
She said it was controlling and invasive. I said it was a gift, and a fairly expensive one at that.
She asked whether I was being serious.
I asked if she was a professional.
She started crying.
Iāve been reflecting on everything and I do appreciate that relationships involve compromise. Lucy has her own personality and I would never want to change that.
But equally, I donāt think itās unreasonable to expect someone to put a little effort in.
Iām not asking her to rob a bank. Iām asking her to show some composure in a Nandoās car park, occasionally improvise in Tesco and accept a perfectly nice piece of jewellery without turning it into a police matter.
Sheās now saying she needs some space, which I completely respect.
Although she did leave the bracelet at my flat, so Iām not entirely sure how she expects me to know where she is.
Anyway, am I being unreasonable here? I feel like Iām making all the compromises and sheās not really meeting me halfway.
Trust.