Hi everyone, bipolar 2 here. My psychiatrist prescribed escitalopram 10 mg (lexapro) after lunch, quetiapine 25 mg (Seroquel) and aripiprazole 5 mg (Abilify) after dinner. In parenthesis I put the commercial brands in the US.

How was your experience taking these meds? What are your thoughts on these doses?

Btw, is there a big difference between consuming the commercial brand vs the generic pills?

I don’t know what’s going on. I keep hearing whispers telling me how worthless I am and how I deserve abuse. My thoughts aren’t working going back and worth between looping and not being able to stay together. It’s like I can’t form a train of thought. I can’t organize them. I have been having physical issues and severe memory issues for a while but it wasn’t affecting my current thoughts until today. I am convinced I’m being targeted. I just don’t know what to do. I keep getting told it’s psychosis but I’m taking my meds. And I have NEVER had my thoughts be like this before. I have had looping yes but I have never had them be so disorganized I can’t think. It’s like the thoughts disappear when I try to single a thought out. What is this?

sorry I know I've been here a bit lately.

So I have a psychology apppt today,. She knows about thew few things I've done. Last couple monthsm got onto therapwurtic level of medication yay! no more psychosis. Within the last ?month? I've overdosed (she sent me to emergency), self harmed requiring surgery (she broke confidentiality) and since another coupole of things. My concern is that if I'm honest about things in the last coule of weeks that she'll break confidentiality again.

I;ve skipped my meds three times without telling support person (taken them from him and slipped into pocket) and each time mood gone sky-high and I'e got barely any sleep but felt extremely rested. Also took some of a potent poison couple days ago.

Some friends/family members, Tho Not All, have claimed I'm some favour of manice. I think theyr exaggerating and wayy overreacting. Psychiatrist couplw weeks ago was fine w me said I was doing great and lookin happy.

If I tell psychologist abot the two para up stuff I'm concerned she'll talk to support person again. Don't want that.

Known that reasoning is combo of at times Entity suggesting/reminding/giving dosages etc. around 'risky' stuff, and the know that I'm functionally invincible.

So how do I make sure professionals know what they should know to make their assessments, but without them freaking out?

Friens yesterday also asked when I was going inpatient and it confused and annoyed me. I don't need to go inpatient I'm literaly fine and doing s well. I have energy and I'm etting stif done.

thanks for readin in advance

For those who took Lithium and stopped due to kidney issues, what was the point where the doctor was like, "No more Lithium for you!"

Is there anyone who’s stopped going to therapy after awhile? I’m kinda tired and bored of it and not wanting to do it anymore.

I haven’t had any attempts or ideations in a very long time, stabilized on a mood stabilizer and antidepressant, and having pretty “normal” days for the most part. I’m starting to dread going every week now, I’ve learned and practice all the coping skills I can do atp. It’s almost feeling like a waste of time.

Any opinions or experiences would be nice from anyone who’s stopped going. Also, how long has it been? Do you just go periodically for check ins? How often is that?

I saw my psychiatrist today and go figures, I'm leaning more of the depressed side of things. Though the meds were toxic for me health wise, we have decided to go back to a combination that still had me capable to deal with school. I've been Amisulpride, Carbamazepine, Lurasidone, Ziprasidone, Fluxoetine, Olanzapine, Quetiapine, Risperidone, Lamotrigine, and Aripiprazole. With Lithium being the only med I haven't tried in the main stream of things. The Amisulpride and Carbamazepine combination was my longest med and I think I was still functional despite still having episodes from time to time. Though in all honesty, I was probably leaning more on the manic side during this time. My oldest sister who is diagnosed said I should probably go back to therapy and ween off of mood stabilisers (take meds for my adhd and to sleep) until exams are over and then see my psychiatrist with a basis of what to try and how how I feel. Any other suggestions?

I have been on 150MG of Lamictal & 15MG of Buspirone for about a year. Recently, my manic episodes & intense rage/irritability, dissociation, and overall depression had gotten to the point where I could barely function and it was tough to even get through the day. I am a stay-at-home mom to a toddler and the overstimulation was drowning me. I have tried countless SSRI’s- Wellbutrin, Zoloft, and Effexor. All of them caused me severe sexual dysfunction and other issues that I couldn’t really deal with.

My psychiatric nurse practitioner started me on 50MG of Seroquel two weeks ago. My first impressions were holy sh*t, 15 minutes after my dose and I am literally dead to the world. It has improved my sleep quality, but I cannot struggle to wake up that much. I have to be “ready to go” every day at 5:30am with my daughter. There is no time for a slow going wake-up routine. Here is the interesting part…

The first week of Seroquel I was a completely different person. Things no longer bothered me, I was completely unbothered, pleasant, and patient. I was amazed. My husband noticed a vast difference. I thought, finally. After the first week passed, I had a day where I just completely snapped. I basically had a mental breakdown. S*icidal ideations, extreme rage… you get the picture. My husband had to come home from work because I was losing it. It was like a full factory-reset out of nowhere. My psychiatric provider told me I needed to go to a partial-hospitalization program for what I was experiencing, which isn’t an option, unfortunately. Since that day I have been extremely lethargic, irritable, and just insufferable. I could sleep all day, everyday if it were an option.

What the hell is going on? I am so tired of feeling this way. I long to be stable, normal, and happy. Especially for my family, whom I love dearly, and they need me.

Thoughts? Thank you, everyone.

Problem with finding true love.

I have lived with bipolar disorder since I was 18—essentially my entire adult life—and it has been with me ever since I started dating and entering into relationships. I am 26 and half now.

My disease is untreated.

Every time I meet new men, they aren’t interested in me as a potential long-term partner; there’s always an ex they’re obsessed with, or some other "better" woman.

Why does this keep happening?

Is it because of my appearance?

I am a slim woman with an average-looking face (I’m not beautiful; I have an average face).

Does not having a pretty face mean I’m doomed to be alone for the rest of my life?

I feel like no one has ever truly loved me. At best, they just want to use my body for a while, or they treat me like a free therapist—crying to me about their exes.

I’m tired by it.

I don’t understand—what am I doing wrong?

My bipolar primarily manifests as dysphoric mania or mixed states, alternating with depression. Happy mania is quite rare for me.

Why am I so unlucky in love?

Is my face to blame—do men only want pretty girls?

On dating sites, I exclusively choose "average" men because my self-esteem is low, yet even they treat me poorly.

I try to avoid making prolonged eye contact with people; when I’m depressed, I feel like they’re judging my ugliness. When I’m in a manic state, I don’t want to scare them, as my gaze can be quite intense.

Do you also struggle to find luck in love, or is there something wrong with me?

Coming on here because I really need any advice, words of encouragement, or just straight up honesty. I've been diagnosed Bipolar 2, and I just feel like no matter what I do or what I try, whether it be therapy, medication, meditation, exercise, etc., that nothing ever feels like it's gonna get better in the long run. I don't understand how I'm going to live like this. I just can't imagine being successful in work, having a family, or maintaining a serious relationship, because I don't have a single close relationship in my life right now for one reason or another.

Even when things get better for periods of time, it feels like no matter what I always get back to the same point, like just an endless spiral that feels like it will never ever go away. I just want honesty, or words of advice, and I have truly no one else to talk to about this. Any type of reply or response is deeply appreciated.

I have bipolar 1 and I am curious about the new olanzapine injection. The old one had a 3 hour waiting period due to post injection delirium/sedation syndrome which sort of took the convenience of having an injection away. The new one doesn’t have the same problem. Would you consider trying it, especially if you’ve had severe mania or psychosis? I’m also curious about the side effects and how it compares to other antipsychotic injections. What are your thoughts?

Anyone else getting warnings from Reddit for their Posts? My bipolar will have me responding to posts out of the ordinary. Then BLAM you get tagged by Reddit with a warning and then after that account restriction then banned. Anyone else having trouble controlling their posts when they are having mania attacks. I have to write slow and delete so much as I catch myself off the rails.

I promised myself that if I ever made it out of this horrible episode, I would come back and share something positive.

I have schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type, and I recently went through the worst depressive episode of my life.

For three months, we tried medication after medication, and nothing seemed to work. I developed akathisia with every medication we tried, which made everything even more unbearable. After trying around seven different medications, I had completely lost hope. I was suicidal and genuinely couldn’t imagine ever feeling better again.

But then I started lithium, and everything changed!!!
My suicidal thoughts have almost completely disappeared, and for the first time in months, I can genuinely say that I’m happy to be alive. The psychotic symptoms of my illness have also improved tremendously thanks to quetiapine.

I never thought I would feel this good again, especially after everything I’ve been through.
So, if you’re struggling right now, if you’ve tried countless medications and feel like nothing will ever work, please don’t lose hope. Sometimes it takes a long time to find the right treatment, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible.

I know how hopeless things can feel, and I just wanted to share my experience to remind someone out there that things really can get better.

Good luck to everyone fighting this illness. It absolutely sucks, but there is still hope. ❤️

I absolutely HATE being bipolar. I hate feeling this way! I hate the shame, embarrassment, and all the other negative feelings that come with an episode when you realize what you have done. And I am medicated and medication compliant! I still had a really bad episode from Wednesday last week to Tuesday this week. I am STILL in a mixed episode.

I am crying all the time, sleeping 4-6 hours a night, I have so much energy my bones feel like they are vibrating, racing thoughts, intrusive thoughts, I am either talking too fast or too slow, I feel absolutely miserable.

I almost ruined my 10 year relationship, hell i can't even say 'almost', in actuality I probably did destroy it. Fuck paranoia. I was convinced he was going to break up with me, so I had to do it first. I just KNEW he was cheating. I just KNEW he was going to tear me down and watch me fall apart for his own sick enjoyment. So I had to do it first. Get to it before him. And guys, there was NO REASON for me to feel this way! He even invited me on his trip! I , me, said no. But it got twisted in my head. Hell a lot of our talking and texts I took and twisted.

I am overwhelmed with guilt, shame, and embarrassment. I worried a lot of our friends and scared the crap out of my SO. His fear is what somewhat bought me lucid. All I could think is: What have I done? Why am I ruining my life? I didn't even have a plan. Just pack up what I could, pack the cats and drive. Maybe to my parents for a week, before going wherever. My parents live in an RV. Less than 28 feet. I don't know what I was thinking. I wasn't thinking.

I just hate this. I hate that its a cycle that it feels hard to break. I hate hurting the people who are close to me. I hate making them worry. I hate not being normal. I hate not having a normal life. I hate that I can't be the partner my SO deserves. I just hate it. And days like today in a stupid mixed episode? I feel so tired and rundown. That I deserve all the hate, the guilt, the shame, and embarrassment.

I was just diagnosed 5 years ago. It was suspected since I was a child/teen, but never officially diagnosed. Looking back, it was so obvious I had bipolar. I wish I could/would have gotten help then. Maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't have fucked my life up so bad over the years. ALL my relationships have suffered, so has work and home.

I just want it to stop.

after a hiccup with insurance (just a PA issue, all good now), i'm finally officially on vraylar after trying out the samples the dr gave me for 2w. saved me from my roughly tri-monthly manic episode which frankly has been life and job-saving. the only bad thing i've noticed is that i've been eating like a motherfucker.

every time i get the craving to eat when i know i shouldn't be eating (meals won't be skipped, don't worry), i just pop a stick of gum in and it seems to offset the craving. will i have to do this the entire time i'm on this medication? i went through a whole pack the other day just trying not to eat :') how do you guys avoid WG on vraylar?

Oggi, dopo più di un mese, sono tornata dalla psicologa.
Premessa: a maggio ho iniziato un percorso di psicoterapia con Resilient + aripiprazolo. L’ho seguito per circa due mesi. Da una parte mi ha aiutata tantissimo: riuscivo ad alzarmi dal letto, a prendermi cura di me, a tenere in ordine casa e ad andare al lavoro. Dall’altra, però, mi ha attutito quella parte di me che mi faceva sentire viva: il senso dell’umorismo, la voglia di parlare, la creatività e la spontaneità. Per questo motivo ho interrotto.
Oggi non stavo particolarmente bene di umore, forse già solo all’idea di dover andare. Per me il colloquio è uno sfogo, ma è anche molto stancante emotivamente.
Arrivata lì mi ha chiesto come stessi dopo l’interruzione delle medicine. Le ho raccontato le cose positive e i piccoli traguardi che sto raggiungendo, poi siamo passate a ciò che mi pesa di più: la famiglia.
La mia situazione familiare è molto complessa e dolorosa. Mio padre mi ha abbandonata da piccola e mi ha lasciata con una madre bipolare, con cui ho vissuto in modo molto pesante fino ai 15 anni. Poi sono andata a vivere con i familiari materni mentre mia madre era rinchiusa in ospedale dopo un TSO.
Oggi, dopo essermi sfogata di cose passate che mi fanno ancora male, le psicologhe mi hanno detto che c’è stato un deterioramento dell’umore. Io ho pianto per tutto il tempo, perché parlare di certe cose è un carico emotivo enorme. Mi hanno mandata dalla psichiatra (una nuova, diversa dalla mia precedente), che mi ha fatto raccontare di nuovo tutto e mi ha detto di ricominciare con il Resilient.
La mia domanda è: perché?
In questo momento sono senza lavoro, con due datori di lavoro che mi devono mesi di stipendio. Non posso vedere i miei nipoti (figli di mio fratello) perché lui non vuole che io stia nella sua vita, nonostante il bambino più grande mi cerchi e mi voglia bene. A me li nega, mentre li porta regolarmente dal resto della famiglia, compresi i miei zii. Tra questi c’è colui che ha abusato di me quando ero ragazzina. Sembra tutto surreale. Due anni fa aspettavo un bambino che ho perso al quarto mese: quella perdita mi ha destabilizzata completamente, ho chiuso con il mio ex e sono entrata in una depressione forte.
Dopo tutti questi eventi traumatici che continuano a essere presenti, mi sembra ovvio stare male. Provo una rabbia e un senso di ingiustizia fortissimi, che a volte mi annientano. Fino a qualche mese fa avevo pensieri suicidi intensi; adesso sono più attenuati e, quando arrivano, cerco di allontanarli.
Il punto è che non credo di avere la stessa patologia di mia madre. Ho chiesto agli psicologi se potesse trattarsi di PTSD, di una forma di depressione, di bipolarismo o di qualcos’altro, e se si potesse lavorare su questo senso di angoscia senza medicinali. Loro insistono sullo stabilizzatore dell’umore. In realtà piango quasi solo quando vado da loro, perché lì posso raccontare le cose senza sentirmi in colpa e senza far male a qualcuno che è coinvolto in quelle situazioni. Con gli amici non ne parlo più: quando l’ho fatto non riuscivano a capirmi, hanno vite più lineari, famiglie presenti, e non riescono a immaginare certe dinamiche, e quando è capitato di raccontargli degli eventi sono stati male.
Lo psicologo da cui andavo prima mi aveva detto che non era depressione e che non avevo patologie come il bipolarismo. Quelli attuali del CSM dicono che “non c’è bisogno di un’etichetta”. La come? Mi stai prescrivendo dei farmaci, ma per cosa? Perché ti ho raccontato degli episodi che sono orribili e ho pianto? Wow che cosa strana?!
Quello che mi fa stare peggio è vedere che è la mia famiglia che ha problemi seri: persone molto concentrate su soldi e reputazione. Per questo mia zia continua a stare con chi mi ha abusata, e mio fratello porta i figli (compresa una bambina) da quell’uomo, perché ci sono regali, soldi e feste di famiglia. A me sembra tutto assurdo. Io sono quella che soffre per i traumi che mi hanno fatto subire… e la “malata” sarei io?
Non so più cosa pensare né cosa fare. A volte mi viene solo voglia di fare le valigie e andarmene lontano da questa realtà e sparire per sempre.
Vorrei capire da voi: secondo voi ha senso riprendere i farmaci in una situazione del genere? Sono veramente io il problema di me stessa? Sono confusa e molto avvilita.

I'm not diagnosed with adhd or autism (perhaps I would be if I was assessed and that's why I feel this way, but also perhaps not).

I think I have a lot of symptoms but not necessarily any of the qualifying criteria.

For example I have some sensory issues, only eat about 3 different meals at a time and its always beige shit, I can't hold eye contact, sometimes I wonder if some of my actions are me stimming, I'm very easily distracted, struggle massively with executive dysfunction, and I'm incredibly forgetful and chatty.

Like I don't think there's enough symptoms to diagnose me (?) and I'm not looking for a diagnosis at all, but there certainly is some overlap and so I was wondering if that could be because of the bipolar?

when I was 20 I had my first episode and my life has been on stand still every time I found the energy to get medicated it would quickly leave me and i lost motivation to even pursue anything better because i didn't believe i really had this im now. 25 and realize i have to be medicated my whole life and im at peace with that. Yesterday i finally got lithium carbonate 300mg to start off with, I had a episode 2 days ago. i took it last night and woke up and feel a difference i could never achieve on my own. My dosage will probably increase overtime but honestly i have hope again and feel more stable I haven't felt like this really since I was 19. I posted on here and said I was gonna get in lithium and finally heal at the being of this year and through all of my episodes and maniac nights, even psychosis i did it! it's possible to heal stop beating yourself up💯

Exhaustion after stopping lithium... how long does chronic fatigue last? At what point does it completely go away? Is it possible for it to persist for a lifetime? How can drugs as harmful to one’s health as Quilonorm—which can so massively destroy a person’s life—even be sold in the first place?

I’ve been buying a blister pack of Pregabalin now and then, but a month ago I bought a whole box. Ran through it quickly so I scored some Gabapentin to try to ease the withdrawals, then I buy a blister pack of Prega and eventually bought some Klonopin to survive the withdrawals and then off.

Do I need to be honest with my psychiatrist about this mess I’ve gotten myself in? I have really bad anxiety which citalopram
used to cover but I’ve been on it 10 years. I DESPERATELY need to calm my anxiety.
It’s constant.

With that said, feeling quite jolly on 300mg Pregabalin and 0,5mg Klonopin.

Basically, ive been having terrible mood swings, days of feeling terribly angry, depressed and worthless and starting to think that I may have bipolar. What/who made you get checked or how did you come to learn you had bipolar?

I used to take the shot but I’ve been exploring not taking it the past few months with guidance.

The issue is I’m very emotional the week leading up to my period, but I am feeling overall maybe more level the other weeks off the birth control.

I’ve got a couple of questions:

1. What does hypomania feel like for you? Are you more dulled? Do you feel more irritable?

2. What does depression feel like for you? Are you more desensitised to it?

3. How were you diagnosed?

A few weeks ago, my psychiatrist added Kventiax to my lamotrigine (to boost my mood and help me sleep—because over the past few weeks I’d been sleeping maybe 3–4 hours a night due to intrusive thoughts)—and honestly, this medication sent me into outer space. After the first dose, I slept for 16 hours. I haven’t felt this good in a long time. It feels like someone turned off everything that was stressing me out. I realize this could lead to hypomania, but it’s hard to let go of this feeling. Has anyone else had a similar experience with this medication?

So here's something that has bothered me ever since I was forced into the hospital for baselessly claiming that I would be the man who would save the world. (I still claim it's aspirational and therefore unfalsifiable until true and therefore not delusional, but anyway...)

Many wealthy and successful people claim (and I've witnessed that behavior in my own parents) that they got to where they were at by working 22 hours a day for weeks on end.

It's claimed that bipolar is as much a sleep disorder as anything and I can understand why and I personally think that it's pretty obvious that there are people in positions of way too much power that seem to regularly engage in behavior that could be construed as manic.

I guess my question is... do you think bipolar (and other serious mental disorders that operate similarly) are massively undiagnosed?

How do you measure sanity in an insane world?

ive been really down in the dumps recently and its been affecting my academic performance so bad how do i manage this