Keep him in private program or move him?

[u/Local-Block-6772]

My son (4yo) was diagnosed with level 1 autism two months ago. Due to the timing, he had already started preK at a private program through our church. Per his teacher, he is doing better than before with meltdowns, transitions and feeling overwhelmed. He has also made 2 friends. Before, when he was having a hard time, it was difficult for her to give him the attention he needed because she has other kids but the school overall was being as accommodating as possible. For example, if the teacher couldn’t be with him, then other teachers or admin would step in.

We finally finished the IEP process and learned that we can only use the IEP for the public preK program and my son would be placed in a special program for autistic children (there are also other NT kids in his class called Peer Pals). He qualified for speech therapy as well as socioemotional support so he would receive that in class. The class would also have 2 additional teachers aides for when he needs 1:1 support.

Meanwhile, my son has already started at a program that has ABA, ST and OT. He’s enjoying it very much and we believe that it has contributed to his improvement in his current program.

My husband and I need to pick between - keeping him in his private program where he has shown improvement and made friends, but won’t have 1:1 support for when/if he has hard times or extra speech therapy. OR put him in this new program with more support/extra ST and hope he enjoys it and makes friends as well. He would continue his ABA/ST/OT in the afternoons.

What would you guys choose?

[u/FerventlySunny]

My kid was in a similar spot at that age. The friends thing is huge but the 1:1 support is the kind of thing you don't realize you need until a rough day hits and nobody's free to step in.

The church program stepping up with admin and other teachers is great, but that's reactive, not proactive. The public preK setup sounds built for him from the start.

Could you ask the church if he could do like 2 days there and 3 in the new program for a trial period? Might be worth floating even if they say no.

[u/Local-Block-6772 → u/FerventlySunny]

Thank you for your advice. That’s a good idea, I can see if that’s something that’s doable.

[u/Even-Supermarket-806 → u/Local-Block-6772]

Seconding this advice! We were in a similar spot and we went all in on support and it really set us up well for the transition to kindergarten and now first grade where he no longer has a one to one. Really a believer in as much support as suggested at age 4 even if it feels disruptive initially

[u/No-Boysenberry-6704]

Children with disabilities have better outcomes when placed in preschool with normally developing kids. Here's the Department of Education's policy: https://sites.ed.gov/idea/idea-files/policy-statement-inclusion-of-children-with-disabilities-in-early-childhood-programs/ . If you scroll down to the bottom and open the whole document they have a section on the scientific basis for inclusion. In my state, a classroom where a majority of students have IEPs does not qualify as inclusive.

I would push back on IEP services being unavailable unless you place him in an autism classroom. Special education is a service, not a place. Where I live the IEP therapists all go to private preschools.

[u/Local-Block-6772 → u/No-Boysenberry-6704]

I can push back but I don’t think it’ll change their decision. In the past the school district has done IEPs only for parents to take the kid to a different school so I believe this policy is to prevent that from occurring.

In his current class I believe maybe 3 other kids are on IEPs out of 11 kids. At the public program, only 2 kids are NT and the rest are ND (out of 11 kids).

Have you had to make a decision like this, what did you end up choosing?