r/weddingshaming • u/Impossible-Code9339 • Aug 28 '25

Dressed like a Bride It happened… his sister wore white.

Just need to vent….

Got married a couple of weeks ago and can’t stop thinking about it. I thought his sister and I got along well, no issues.

For our engagement party, she was the only attendee in cream and white besides me, the bride, in a white dress. Gave her the benefit of the doubt - it’s just our engagement, she came from out of province, etc etc.

Then came the giant texts about how offended her and her husband were about having a child-free wedding and how their kids were more important than all my cousins kids, so there should be an exception.

Wedding day arrived, and it being such a whirlwind I honestly didn’t notice what she was wearing. Then multiple guests started quietly coming up to me, asking who the one in white was. I guess word got back to her because at the end of the night, she went to my now husband, holding a flower against her dress and said “for the record”, implying it wasn’t white…. I suppose she is colourblind.

Not sure if we/he/I should be asking if there’s an issue or if we should address it at all.

Ugh.

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918

u/hlnhr Aug 28 '25

Not acknowledging at all is the best way to proceed. You say it yourself, you didn’t see it before people told you. It shows how insignificant it is and that’s what she needs to feel

38

u/Majestic_Tear_8871 Aug 28 '25

I’m wondering why people felt the need to point it out? To cause drama? As OP stated, she wouldn’t have even noticed if everyone had stfu.

If that’s the worst that happened, the day was a success. Just watch that chick from now on.

79

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '25

[deleted]

19

u/875_champagne Aug 28 '25

Yea. Not to mention folks are probably drinking and words slip out more freely.

17

u/TootsNYC Aug 28 '25

I do think those of us with social awareness should remember that there's no need to point it out to the bride, etc.

Why make her upset about it? Nothing can be done to change it.

30

u/YetAnotherAcoconut Aug 28 '25

Maybe picture it as “showing support” or “empathizing” with the bride and you’ll understand why they did it. They want her to know they see the rudeness too.

How many times do women post here thinking they’re crazy for being bothered by someone being rude, these people are saying “you’re not crazy, she’s rude.”

ETA: I wouldn’t do this but I think it’s worth understanding why someone would. I don’t think the shocked guests are anywhere near as bad as SIL.

2

u/Particular-Buy-33 Aug 28 '25

Depends on your relationship to the person or if they are just checking in taking the temperature

2

u/TootsNYC Aug 28 '25

I still think that if you want to be the sensible person, you don't even bring it up to her.

That's part of what makes the unpleasantness of it. Raises it up to a true annoyance—remember, our OP hadn't even noticed it.

"It won't get better if you pick at it"

1

u/Letsgotravelling-124 Aug 29 '25

Nothing can be done about it? I’m sure a bit of red wine can fix that.

3

u/TootsNYC Aug 29 '25

That’s not a good fix. That’s more drama and the total loss of the high ground.

1

u/Letsgotravelling-124 Aug 29 '25

Pretty sure none of the wedding party would blame anyone for pouring red wine on a person who is trying to steal the spotlight by wearing white. It would take the drama out.