I miss girlhood/I miss femininity/I miss the feminine experience/I protect the girl inside me/I have a connection to womanhood ... etc etc.

every time I see these I genuinely retch because ohhhhh my fucking god if it's such a choice for you and you miss girlhood uhhhh go back?? what the fuck. I keep thinking about how the average cis man would react upon seeing this like oh my fucking god, integrating will be impossible without being stealth, being transsexual is the most embarassing thing ever because of the transvestite women poisoning the well.

on that note, I only semipass, and when I pass I usually pass as a queer foreigner with hOt sLaViC bOy ViBeS. THREE theyfabs have flocked to me thus far and each time they shyly stopped talking to me when they realised my interests don't stop at hazbin hotel but range to shit like yugoslav history, classical literature, and eastern european car models. i'm not their cookie cutter queer and they usually assume I'm not trans and therefore run away because i'm not their idea of a revolutionary gender warrior

like genuinely please leave me alone why do people come up to me purely because of the assumption that I am marginalised, FUCK OFF

The umbrella term changes and expands every single day, there is only one label that consistently reflects the characteristics of having gender incongruence AND gender dysphoria. Transsexual. People chasing euphoria (formerly transvestites) have historically advocated and reclaimed the transsexual movement, cross dressers and paraphilics want public acceptance and respect that people with innate medical incongruence worked for. We can't gatekeep transgender anymore, they won. Anyone can be transgender, gender dysphoria has successfully been ommitted from that criteria. I have nothing in common with trans IDs, I do not identify as male, I am male. Transgenders can identify as theriens or trans race or trans age or kink gender or almond gender, or I don't even have time to list them all. Trans IDs are not and will not ever be the same thing as transsexuals. Gender affirming care is only meant to treat gender dysphoria. Can we collectively redefine transsexual to include pre transition or non op trans people that are kicked out of the transgender movement for being transmed? Can all transmeds regardless of stage in transition use the term transsexual to separate themselves from transgender? We can minorly tweak a label and keep it far away from them and they can have their 500+ interchangeable ones. Now we can be factually correct everytime we say dysphoria is necessary to be transsexual.

Hello, everyone. Fuck, where do I even begin?

Well, I have a friend (cis female) who came out to me the other day as trans, when, in actuality, she identifies as non-binary. And I really hate that because she seems to think gender has no meaning, and she considers herself a lesbian. It feels like she’s making fun of me, even though I know she isn’t. She knows how fucked up my childhood was. I attempted suicide, and I felt like there was a cloud hanging over my head every single day. When people asked me about my future, I saw nothing. That was my experience. I know I have depression mixed in with it, but she knows how badly I struggle. She has no plans to take T, uses they/them pronouns, and hates men, yet she likes me? Yeah, I want to say something to her, but I hate making people angry, so I keep my mouth shut.

But nonbinary isn't even real. For one, I belive in two genders, not all those made up genders. and no, I don't believe it's a gender itself. I think it's a made-up label that inadvertently reinforces gender stereotypes. We're basically back in the 1950s. Instead of allowing women to be masculine and men to be feminine, people are creating entirely new gender identities around those differences.

For me, being transgender is a medical issue that requires gender dysphoria. When you say that, people respond with, "Well, nonbinary people can have gender dysphoria, too." And sure, but a lot of nonbinary are transitioning toward being male. They get top surgery, take T, and experience dysphoria. To me, they're trans men who are in denial about being trans. I also think there is something much deeper to being trans such as the gendered brains? and our souls and past lives. Of course, these are just my personal theories, not established facts. But I have a hard time believing there’s no deeper reason behind it all. I believe there’s a reason for why we are the way we are, even if we don’t fully understand it yet. And as for non-binary identities,.. it's a trend :/

I think these new terms and labels are also damaging, especially to children who are led to believe that, because they aren't masculine or feminine, they must be nonbinary.

I believe nonbinary people generally fall into one of two categories: either they're trans people who identify as nonbinary because it seems easier to deal with, or they're simply masculine women and feminine men who don't conform to gender stereotypes. And there's nothing wrong with being a masculine woman or a feminine man! Women shouldn't have to identify as something other than women because they're masculine, and men shouldn't have to identify as something other than men because they're feminine. Saying someone can't be a woman because she's masculine, or a man because he's feminine, is harmful. These people who identify as nonbinary are making it harder for the rest of us, because people see them and base their opinions of what it means to be trans on them. Now, people are even using they/them pronouns for trans people who aren't nonbinary.

This happened to me. I worked hard on my transition, and now, because of all this, I feel like I'm back to square one, being seen as something other than the man I've worked so hard to become. After everything I've gone through, it's incredibly frustrating to feel like I'm being lumped into a joke category of cos players. I just wanna to be seen as a man, not as "something else".

That’s the end of my rant. It’s long, I know, but I’ve been awake for three days, and I just needed to get it off my chest. and I want to know if anyone else agrees with me. Do you feel the same way I do?

I am 2 weeks post op from top surgery. For years my dysphoria has literally tormented me basically every day. My chest was the worst dysphoria I’ve ever experienced, so many moments in my life that were supposed to be happy have been destroyed because of my dysphoria. Binding my chest made me feel like I was wearing a disgusting bra, taping my chest ripped my skin off and severely damaged my skin too. It was hard for me to not think about my chest, staying focused at school or work was hard, having sex was hard. Having fun on vacation or swimming was hard, sleeping was hard, all I thought about was if I was flat.

I started the top surgery process on my 18th birthday and waited 5 painful months for the day of. I went under, and when I woke up it was like I had never had dysphoria. I slept that night not thinking about my chest, I’ve slept every night after that without thinking about my chest. I can look down when I shower, when I’m naked I feel like I’m looking at my actual body. I thought it would feel like a bigger deal, my dysphoria going away, or maybe I felt like it would fade. But no, it’s as if a switch just flipped, and my dysphoria just silently left and will never come back.

To anyone who feels like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel and you’re doomed to feel like shit forever, that’s not true. I can’t even emphasize how it’s just not here anymore, when you transition it literally just goes away and the thoughts don’t even cross your mind ever again.

My friend and I were discussing this recently. I tend to be a bit of a 'fence-sitter' in this aspect, and was wondering what other people's views on it were.

I'm a fully transitioned transsexual male (ftm), 33, I've been on hormones for 10 years, and have had full top and bottom surgery. Besides a few differences, I, for the most part, view myself as a transmedicalist, and generally defer to science for most things.

My friend is a bit younger than me, 26. He's been on hormones for about 7 years, and desires very strongly to seek top surgery. However, he doesn't really desire to seek out bottom surgery. He is diagnosed medically with gender dysphoria, but has stated that he doesn't really have a lot of bottom dysphoria, or any major issues with his parts. He's overall content with the amount of bottom growth he's seen while on testosterone, and he's said that he doesn't really like the general results that he's seen from bottom surgeons in the United States, and doesn't have the money or the support system to go out of country for bottom surgery, and doesn't really see the point in getting something he may not be happy with anyway, when he doesn't really experience a lot of bottom dysphoria.

He was previously a tucute, but has started doing more research and has started to lean much more transmedicalist, and has started spending a lot of time lurking on this subreddit. However, after spending some time on this subreddit, he recently came to me and asked if him calling himself trans would be upsetting or offensive, and if he is genuinely trans even if he doesn't have bottom dysphoria.

We got into a discussion about it, and I realized that I didn't really have an answer for him. I've never really thought about it, and would consider myself 'on the fence' about the subject. I don't really have an issue with him calling himself trans, however, I don't know if I really like the idea of him referring to himself as a transsexual either.

So, we thought we would defer to the subreddit that sparked this chain of questioning. Does someone need to have dysphoria over their full body, or can dysphoria be more severe in some places and not severe in others? How should that person label his/herself if they don't have full-body dysphoria?

I promise that I am not a conservative trying to win an argument. I am a transsexual male seeking some sort of masculinizing bottom surgery, I believe either would provide me with relief. My top dysphoria is well managed with the tools at my disposal and I am fortunate enough to not have any issues passing. I have been on hormones since I was younger. I have tried virtually every type of therapy and do not know how much longer I can make it with my genitals as they are. I exercise, yes. I have also been using prosthetics but everything feels fake no matter how “realistic” it is. I just want to feel comfortable in my body not in my clothes. I feel so weak in comparison with how well others are able to handle it if they even deal with it. Again, I don’t know how much longer I can make it in my body as it is.

I’m asking for any resources for a sex change at 17. I turn 17 at the end of October.

Edit: I am located in Colorado

I don’t want metoidioplasty or phalloplasty scars in art. I don’t want top surgery scars in art. Sure if you’re trans and you want to draw yourself but every single OC you make does not have to be trans. You don’t have to shout from the rooftops, “HEY EVERYONE!!! THIS IS WHAT A TRANS PERSON’S SURGICAL SCARS MIGHR LOOK LIKE!!!!!!!!!” You’re just fucking over the actual trans people who are trying to live a normal happy life.

I've been on testosterone for 5 weeks, 30mg. I had a conversation this morning and I realized I'm starting to display the stereotypical T voice. I hate to be like this but I do not want that. I've been singing all my life and singing is everything to me. It is all I'm worth and all I'm good for. If my voice gets fucked up I will genuinely end my shit. How do I make sure that my voice drops properly and doesn't end up permanently ruined? I know it's to due with the thickness and length of the vocal cords and that if they thicken but don't grow properly that causes the sound. How do I make sure they grow properly?
I've heard to go low and slow to prevent your larynx from ossifying prematurely. Does anyone know anything else about that? Should I reduce my dosage? I'm 18 for context.

I’m 20, 2 years on test and fully stealth, will be getting top surgery in a year.

The thing is i look so young. I’m genuinely considering taking tren just to look older.

I dress well, am always groomed, i work out, i’m genuinely a good looking guy, except for being 5’7. I have a good job and started college this month. But i still look like a good looking maybe 17 year old on a good day, despite having a whole ass beard and literally doing everything else that guys my age do.

I get regularly hit on - by 16 year olds, sometimes even younger, which is not gonna happen for obvious reasons, women and men my age assume i’m not even an adult, and if they do they don’t find me attractive since all the man my age actually look like grown man and not just-post puberty teenager.

Even at the bars and clubs everyone assumes i’m 17 tops - where i live most clubs are 16+, but everyone whose underage gets a specific stamp that doesn’t let them purchase drinks.

I recently went to a meet-up with people from my college and everyone thought i just skipped my way to college and started earlier than them, despite the fact i in fact took 2 gap years to be able to afford my transition.

I’m so jealous of other man it’s exhausting. I hate having to fight and work for something that others are born with.

I'm a transsexual woman (Harry Benjamin Syndrome), I feel that in a relationship, I CANNOT STAND A MAN TOUCHING MY GENITALS—if it happens, I feel almost like I’m being raped. I can only engage in sexual relations if I’m submissive and receptive, while keeping those areas hidden. What I don’t understand—and can’t stand—is how straight men either reject me or, if they do accept me, often do so with the malicious intent of wanting to touch me down there; it’s horrible and grotesque. Why is it so hard for them to just treat me like a normal girl and avoid looking at my genitals until I’ve had vaginoplasty?

Most people would says its simple, because they are différents but some detransitioneur thought they were trans and have gender dysphoria but its was body dysmorphia

I geniuly what to know the différence between these three

i didn't know if this would count as the rant/vent flair but a fucking roller coaster?? are you fucking kidding me?????

I swear to god I don't mean any of this with transphobic intent, but anyone notice that like 99% of pro trans memes are just "validate me or I will kill you" like its funny at first but kinda doesn't help trans people at all, like transphobes kinda bank on the argument that "trans people are violent and mentally unwell" and they don't need to go far to get ammunition for that argument, go into any post where theres any debate about trans people and I guarantee you will find someone posting a meme that's punchline revolves around "I kill transphobe" which yeah to other trans people is funny, but to outsiders, people who are unacknowledged on any trans issues, it does nothing but validate any preconceived ideas of trans people being immature people who lash out against anyone who questions them.

and anytime I mention this to anyone I always get told the same few things, I either get called a transphobe, (I am a trans man) or its "well transphobes want us dead too" which yeah I can't argue about that later point, there are a good amount of transphobes who genuinely wish death upon the entire trans community, but if I dare say "two wrongs don't make a right"

I wish we could at LEAST get those smug leftists strawman dismantling comics, at least then the only thing you could argue is that they're pretentious, I'd rather the community have a stereotype of being smug leftists over deranged murderers who slaughter people the instant our feelings are hurt. (obviously I disagree with these stereotypes I am just pointing them out as common ones placed on the community)

I know I’m faking being trans and it’s obvious, I want people reading to this to be honest with me. I know I’m not really a boy, I just wish I was more dysphoric so I could medically transition. It’s clear I’m not. I sometimes don’t even feel anything, i find myself unnaturally attractive, or when I’m attracted to when I get scared I want to look like them. I want to believe this is just my ocd but if I was really a man I would know it. I just wish I wanted to have a male body, sometimes I’m afraid male parts don’t even look right to me, I don’t find men attractive. Binding feels weird and so does packing, I wanna believe it’s because it’s not real but with everything else combine, it just a sign I’m faking. I genuinely am envious of men though, I feel depressed when I see cis men because I want to look like them. I feel hopeless when I look at myself or hear my voice. I’m really trying my best to stop faking it and make myself be a girl. I don’t deserve to transition, other people need it more than me, I’m a girl and I always will be even if I don’t like it or it upsets me. I feel like I’m so used to my body at this point, I’m just frustrated and upset but it’s not dysphoria I just need to get over it. I probably only feel “dysphoria” because I wish I could become a man and I should force myself to like my body. I was never a man and I never could be, I have to be a woman because that’s how my brain structure is and I have to deal with it. I feel like a mutilated cis man. I can’t stand being a woman but I know I am one. I don’t want to keep being forced to be female

​

now I get to enjoy a normal life w regular friends and girlfriend without constantly having to filter everything I say to avoid upsetting my radqueer ex-friends. back then even going to a festival like this, which is pretty associated with straight people in my area, would have gotten me judged soooo hard by them. I used to feel like I had to justify every little thing about myself to them. now I can just exist, have fun, enjoy my relationship and be one of the guys at a festival. it's crazy how much better life gets when you stop surrounding yourself with people who make you feel like you're never politically correct enough. I never actually agreed with them but I pretended I did to keep those friendships. they were always telling me to stay away from cis or straight people. when I started college I pretty much did the opposite and made some good friends most of whom are cishet (but supportive). we never even talk about me being trans because my deadname doesn't appear anywhere. sometimes being yourself really is all it takes to realize that life can actually be good 👍

So far I am a closeted or questioning trans guy who leans on being a truscum, but my friend has no clue I’m trans, where my friend is a very tucute person who looks just like woman, is very hyper feminine, and makes no efforts to pass (hell I’m less feminine as a closeted woman) . I have been she/hering them for a while (they haven’t ever said anything for 4 years so I just assume they were non binary) but recently they told me to call them he/him pronouns, and I’ll try to do it, they are my good friend after all but I somewhat feel like I’m going against my own values doing this, I want to ask them why they would even want to transition but whatever.

I try to be respectful but I guess I’m just confused and I don’t think I’ll ever understand non dysphoric trans people. I find it hard to believe that someone like them feels the same intense disconnection from womanhood as I do. I love them very much as a friend but our views on being trans are so different it’s hard (I even recall them saying “it’s crazy how some trans people can be so transphobic themselves” in the context of something about truscums) and they don’t even know I’m trans. Idk what should I do. I want to respect them but it kinda feels like they wanna be trans more than they want to be a guy

Hello! I am an undergraduate student at the University of Colorado, Boulder. I am researching the experiences of transgender people living in the United States for my senior-year honors thesis in the sociology department. I am currently seeking participants for a one-time survey that lasts approximately 5-10 minutes. If you are a primary resident of the United States, identify as transgender, and are 18+, feel free to participate!

There is no compensation for this study, and there is also no direct benefit to you as a participant. However, the results of this study will be used to further the sociological understanding of the transgender experience. Frequently, external phenomena are investigated. I am instead interested in learning about your internal experiences within the cis-normative structure of American society.

More information about this study is listed in the introductory page, which can be found through this link: https://cuboulder.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_eu01kidPQH2f8vY

This survey will NOT record your IP address, location metadata, or personal information.

Any questions or concerns about the goals of this research can be emailed to my advisor, Dr. Glenda Walden, at [glenda.walden@colorado.edu](mailto:glenda.walden@colorado.edu). As this is an IRB-approved study, you may also contact our IRB with any concerns, complaints, or questions about your rights as a research subject at (303) 735-3702 or [irbadmin@colorado.edu.](mailto:irbadmin@colorado.edu.I) I am also happy to answer any questions!

Edit: I can see when duplicate submissions are made. These will be excluded to preserve the integrity of the data.

I just feel so fucking ugly bro. I’m ftm and have been on T for 4 years. I know I look like a guy because I haven’t been misgendered in years, but I just feel like I turned out so fucking ugly. My face is too round and short and my head is so fucking small. So are my hands and feet.

I have basically no facial hair to speak of except a mustache. My eyebrows grow in so feminine no matter what I do to try to get them to be square. I feel like I’ll never look remotely handsome because I have shitty fucking genes. I just look like a woman with a mustache. I look so obviously clocky and only look good in certain angles. Not to mention now my hair is falling out.

I just really hate myself today and hate being trans. I just so so desperately wish I could have been born male. My little brother looks so much better than me and it’s humiliating. Not only does he get to be tall but he also gets to actually embody the masculinity I desperately desperately wish I had.

And please no “haha wanna switch” comments. They just make me feel worse.

I’m just so sick of this and nobody fucking understands how miserable being a dysphoric trans person actually is. And it pisses me off that non-dysphoric trans people have somehow decided that binary ftm men are the devil and don’t belong in trans spaces. Even if I get gendered correctly that doesn’t mean I don’t deal with the same specific nuanced pain that comes from being trans.

I just feel so fucking alone and I hate myself.

i usually am a very talkative person but since realising im trans, i really hate talking. But because im usually so talkative people get confised and upset with me when i dont talk. This runs into every aspect of my life. I feel like im not allowed to be sad arpund people because they just question me. Like can i just live?????? Why do i constantly have to be under scrutiny?? And its gotten even worse now. I have a very feminine and high voice. You can easily tell im female by my voice. So when i speak it js makes me crash out because like omg. And then ppl get on my case when i dont speak and its just like LEAVE ME ALONEEEEEEEEEEE oh my GOD. im also not out to anybody and i cant come out to anybody, nobody i know would be supportive. 🫩🫩🫩🫩🫩 like it js pmo. esp cus i have moral/death OCD and a very specific kind of my death OCD is thinking that if i upset someone they r gunna kill themself.. so when im constantly upsetting people bc i dont tlak.... but i dont talk bc it upsets me..... then i go into ocd spiral... its like a never ending loop

Not only do I have to accept that cis people don't get it.

And that they don't accept transwomen. Not really.

On top of that the "community" is filled with tucutes, femboys, cross dressers, agp s and perverts so I really feel strongly inclined to keep my distance.

That and these people actively contributing to right wing political persecution of trans people, including truscum.

I'm not sure how to approach the situation.

Maybe I should just actively work towards developing a heart of stone. Empathy IS a weakness in this world.

Neither the people voting for right wing parties and politicians, driven into a hateful frenzy by propaganda, nor the goons who will eventually come to take us to the death camps are going to have empathy for us, either.

I'm gonna try to make this quick and maybe short(?) because we don't really even feel comfortable telling people personal stuff, even behind a screen. And you don't have to believe us, that's okay, we're strangers, but we wanna know something since we're particularly interesting in researching it on our own, yet we'd like some personal opinions from people that aren't "endogenic"(DID fakers) or people who don't think dysphoria is a medical condition. I'm(the one typing) very nervous to ask because I don't like asking people stuff like this that reveals personal information like our disorders, but I just want some outside insights with people who actually experience dysphoria.

We know DID by now. It is the disorder with the most larpers and misinformation both from supposed professionals and more specifically the media, and then the people. And we know what dysphoria is, come on.

My question now is that, since we know that alters are distinctive personality or identity states, and can present in many distinctive ways from their body(older, younger, different gender, ideologies, and personalities), that means that an alter with a different gender/sex identity could form, and therefore feel a disconnection from the body's assigned gender and sex, so...could that be counted as dysphoria? In your(the reader's) perspective?

I ask, we ask, because it is so agonizing for us. I won't give out much of our details, but there is an alter that is a different gender frlm the body, and living with them is a nightmare because of how disconnected they feel from how I decide to present myself. It is MY body. MINE, and I host. The decision are MINE to take. But then I get these influences, and I get the excruciatingly dysphoria. We look at ourselves in the mirror sometimes and we panic because oh my god why couldn't we have been born the opposite sex?

It is not even a "aw man I don't look like [insert fashion, race, age, or other distinctive identity shit presentation]" because I can manage that. And also we're a very, VERY small system. There's only 4 identities. We all share the same race and age alongside other stuff. We are fine on that.

It's the sex characteristic that drives us insane!!

Most of the times the mind is just: "Why do we have [sex characteristics we don't like]??" And constant distress.

And then, it goes away when they go away, and now, we're comfortable with our assigned sex. And its heavenly. We enjoy being a [gender].

We are aware thag Dysphoria doesn't have to be this excruciatingly pain that is there 24/7 distressing you to the point of, you know, for everybody. Everyone's unique, and their experiences are equally unique. But god it is like that for us. It is...We have the heavy desire to transition when that identity is around, and we look forward to it even. But at the same why couldn't we just be born a male? Why must we take this hardships when we might even not succeed?

Especially we have alters that are also connected to our assigned sex and gender at birth, who enjoy being our assigned sex and gender at birth. So it's a lose/lose situation until we integrate/combine or they leave or I just stop having these people in my head!!!

I'm very sorry if this sounded like I was throwing my life's miseries on this truscum server. I know this is not my place to be. I don't wanna be here. Yes I'll talk this to a therapist, no need to say that to us in the comments. We just really wanna read other people's perspectives, opinions, and mayhe even personal experiences since I've only rea one so far and it was here on this server but from a post from like, 6+ years ago...yeah.

We might delete our post or account after this. Please no mean comments this comes from the deepest parts of our shared soul in genuine curiosity, and we'd love to read how maybe some of your disorders affect your dysphoria since we also read a post about how some people with autidm have a very different experience with dysphoria(from an autistic transsexual person). And how some people say that certain conditions they have give tjem dysphoria because theyre typically attributed to sex they feel dysphoria about. That inspired us to ask.

Please do not ask for personal info or a lot of details! We're here to read, not really to reply unless it piques our interest. If you see any errors in the post please forgive me I dont write well in english. I'm so nervous I'm shaking.

it’s october now and it’s still 80 degrees outside every day!! i told myself in the summer “you just have to get through this for a little while, then you won’t have to sweat your ass off cause you have an extra layer on!” but nahhh. i hate this bro. global warming is a dick

She was a beautiful trans girl, only 16, with a whole life ahead of her. My talented little angel, the last time I’ve seen her was the day that she was in her new skirt. She was so happy about it, but so sad inside. I’ve tried my best to help her, transphobia is cruel, being trans is cruel, my heart can’t even comprehend it now. I just wish that every trans person could find their own peace, there is still time, it’s not too late, your life matters even if you think it doesn’t. **Rest in peace, Ashley, you were everything to me.**