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u/Hcavok 8h ago
Real ones know Jesus actually died in North Japan and his brother took his place on the cross
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u/DataSittingAlone put your dick away waltuh 3h ago
This term is a bit overused but this is some ball knowledge
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u/Taymac070 8h ago
Jesus was my parent's roofing guy.
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u/CanadiaBoi dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 8h ago
Jesus is my cousin
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u/M1S_F1T 8h ago
Jesus is my Friend
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u/TendiesOnPoint waltuh 8h ago
Jesus is my buddy
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u/ParagonChariot 7h ago edited 7h ago
I thought Jesus was born jewish under roman occupation. Hes was a Galilean and a 2nd class roman citizen, where they were not truly romans but lived under their rule.
Also he was Jewish, but I dont know if Palestine existed as a known region back then. However, Bethlehem is located in the modern day West Bank, Palestine. Though it should be noted Jesus was probably not Palestinian.
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u/DataSittingAlone put your dick away waltuh 3h ago
As I mentioned in another comment Jesus is Palestinian in the same way that Julius Caesar is Italian. It's technically correct but really misleading
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u/Akrylkali waltuh 1h ago
It's not even technically correct. Napoleon is also not Italian, even though he was born in Corsica.
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u/Sh_Pe I want pee in my ass 3h ago
It kinda existed as a path from Egypt to Mesopotamia. But there was not such a thing as “Palestinian” back then. The modern meaning of the word emerged in the 50s (before then, even some relatively Zionist organizations called themselves Palestinians).
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u/Stand_kicker 5h ago
Nah fam, Jesus is Muslim.
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u/lacklusterwannabe 5h ago
Jesus was a Buddhist. He went to Asia to study during the times missing from the bible. Found missing scriptures explain he spent all that time in Asia.
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u/MichiganCraigslister 8h ago
Palestininininian?
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u/DataSittingAlone put your dick away waltuh 6h ago edited 6h ago
Nazareth is in modern day Palestine so you could technically make the argument that he's Palestinian but it's really misleading. Like saying Julius Caesar was Italian because he is from what's now Italy
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u/MichiganCraigslister 6h ago
He could be Australian or Korean for all I care
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u/DataSittingAlone put your dick away waltuh 6h ago
Saying he's Palestinian is misleading but saying he's Australian doesn't have any argument. The most accurate thing to say is that Jesus was a Jew from the ancient Middle East/Levant
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u/awildboyappeared We do a little trolling 7h ago
Jesus was asian that's why they could easily find another guy that looks alike to replace him
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u/imsharank 7h ago
Jesus was just a multi billion dollar idea, not a person.
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u/AK-50_Ocelot Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 5h ago
Most historians agree he was a real historical figure
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u/imsharank 5h ago
I mean, yeah there was a person. Picked a guy and created the persona
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u/AK-50_Ocelot Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 4h ago
Nah... there's no organization that picked a guy to manufacture a persona. If you actually knew anything about early Christianity you'd know the movement grew organically around the life, teachings and crucifixion of Jesus, these are things that historians agree happened. Maybe stay off the history channel after midnight eh?
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u/deadinternetlaw 1h ago
Well you see, the historians are bribed to all fake the evidence. Some might even say they're all in on it. There's no way you believe some random "expert" would know what happened 2000 years ago right
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u/deleeuwlc 🏳️⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️⚧️ 6h ago
Pretty sure he was a real person, the question is if he actually did all that
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u/JungleHam 3h ago
Saying "Jesus was real" is the same as saying "Michael was real", or "Ahmed was real". there was probably a lot of Joshuas around
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u/TheShiftmaster 8h ago
Jesu was actually Aramaic
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u/FatChewbacca 8h ago
Jesus was actually ondisdick
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u/TheShiftmaster 8h ago
The ol' onthisdick-icaton trick eh? clever very clever but I'll get you next time
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u/FatChewbacca 8h ago
I'll be wary if we ever cross paths again
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u/TheShiftmaster 8h ago
I will be using multiple accounts, you will not know which ones are secretly me in disguise
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u/FistmyBump1 5h ago edited 4h ago
“Good morning Saar! Thou shall not redeem.”- Jesus, the book of Mathew, 7:19
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u/deleeuwlc 🏳️⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️⚧️ 6h ago
Jesus was quite literally Jewish. Many people saw him as the Jewish messiah and many others didn’t, which is where Christianity and Judaism separated
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u/Asckle 1h ago
It's a little more complex than that. Christianity didn't "split" from Judaism. Judaism had a few sects making up the religion as a whole, Christianity being one of them. When the second temple was destroyed all but 2 of these groups dissapeared. The two were Christianity, the Jewish sect that was now spreading amongst gentiles, and the Pharisees, who didn't spread their religion amongst gentiles. Over time, since Christianity became most popular with gentiles, it became basically a seperate thing, while the Rabinnic Judaism of the Pharisees, since it remained only with the ethnic jews, became known simply as "Judaism".
Essentially, both modern Judaism and Christianity are offshoots of second temple Judaism. It's not like there's a consistent through-line of Judaism that Christianity shoots off from
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u/CorrectRange7312 Literally 1984 😡 7h ago
Aside the shitpost, I really love depiction of Jesus in different cultures.
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u/Aromatic-Dig9997 3h ago
Bruh y'all are wrong... Jesus is a japanese physicist working on string theory
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u/Mxhmoud lets build a hole together and then libe in it 42m ago
I don't think he was palestinian but he was definitely not jewish in faith.
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u/Vechan13 20m ago
He was definitely a Jew. You cannot live by the Mosaic Covenant and cite the Jewish Scriptures as divine authority without being Jewish in faith.
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u/Awkward_Benefit_5887 Big chungus wholesome 100 8h ago
Interesting form of racism ngl,thrashed both groups at the same time
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u/Choice-Sky3432 uhhhh idk 3h ago
20 downvotes? Damn this place has gotten less racist.
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u/Choice-Sky3432 uhhhh idk 3h ago
I gotta change this flair
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8h ago
[deleted]
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u/yukiki64 8h ago
Pretty sure its agreed apon by both religious and secular scholars that Jesus did exist.
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u/acacio201 8h ago
You would be labeled crazy by both of them since there are records about him, but at least you would unite them for a common cause.
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u/AutoModerator 8h ago
Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. And rats make me crazy.
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