r/programmingcirclejerk • u/reg_panda • 15d ago

Python is that kind of cool one behaves when visiting parents of your would be spouse for the first time. Tcl on the other hand is like playing one's secret exclusive and somewhat dangerous games with kid school bestie.

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=49896712#49900128
42 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

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40

u/reg_panda 15d ago

Idk why y'all stopped collecting posts of HNers likening programming languages to girls they'd like to fuck. I always enjoy these!

22

u/reflexive-polytope 15d ago

Oh, but programming languages are exactly like women.

Never mind fucking them, I want to understand them in the first place.

Cherish a woman who will never make you say “WTF are you doing, bitch?” For she's the most precious thing that could exist in this world.

33

u/edo-lag Considered Harmful 15d ago

I had to read the first sentence 8 times before it made sense and had 2 strokes in-between.

22

u/Honest-Finish3596 15d ago

The conclusion is that the post author wants to fuck Guido van Rossum.

13

u/edo-lag Considered Harmful 15d ago

Never judge a Guido for his Python

5

u/syklemil Considered Harmful 14d ago

Nah, seems like they want to marry Rossum, fuck Osterhout, and then lost the game.

1

u/defunkydrummer Lisp 3-0 Rust 2d ago

but Guido is a fan of BBC -- Better Borrow Checker

2

u/defunkydrummer Lisp 3-0 Rust 2d ago

I have to follow the same process whenever I have to read junior-webshits' .py code.

24

u/somewhataccurate now 4x faster than C++ 15d ago

Lisp is like that one girl... you know

1

u/defunkydrummer Lisp 3-0 Rust 2d ago

I've been working in 'C', off and on, for nigh on 40 years. I absolutely guarantee, with ZERO chance of being wrong, that I can write anything you want in 'C', better than you can in any language of your choice aside from assembler. It will be more efficient, smaller, and faster.

Touting these new fangled silly languages, which are built on top of languages like 'C', is silly. If you learned how to write stuff safely in the first place, which all of us did in the 70s and 80s, you wouldn't be proclaiming some idiotic new paradigm as "the only way to do things".

Seriously, just stop. I imagine you with your nose in the air, drinking white wine with a pinky extended. Okay, really, I don't, but that's the image you are pushing.

Oh, and before you start, yes, I can work in any language you mention. In any style you mention. Let me give you the answer we gave back then. There ain't no such thing as a silver bullet.

13

u/kettes_leulhetsz My C code works with -O3 but not with -O0 14d ago

Rust gives you crabs.

11

u/mutex_troglodyte What part of ∀f ∃g (f (x,y) = (g x) y) did you not understand? 15d ago

And Go is like being locked in a cage and brutally tortured to death, something which the average orangeshit enjoys on a weekly basis.

10

u/hedgehog1024 Rust apologetic 14d ago

And Go is like being locked in a cage

Chastity cage, to be more precise.

10

u/catladywitch 14d ago edited 14d ago

Python is like a good kid on their first visit to their partner's parents in that it's an act and the facade only goes so far. Tcl is like playing with your bestie back at school in that it's a memory from over 20 years ago.

1

u/stone_henge Tiny little god in a tiny little world 14d ago

This is what technocracy looks like folks