r/nottheonion • u/wds1 • 2h ago

Rudy Giuliani’s Legal Defense Fund Isn’t Spending on Legal Expenses

washingtonsun.com

1.0k Upvotes

46 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ArgentineBeauty • 14h ago

Manchester Sex Surrogate Claims Sleeping With More Than 100 Married Men Helped Save Their Marriages

fashiontimes.co.uk

3.9k Upvotes

453 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ColdTurkishCoffee • 10h ago

Halo: Combat Evolved Gets A Nintendo 64 Multiplayer Port

retrododo.com

494 Upvotes

34 comments

r/nottheonion • u/CzarDM • 4h ago

Escaped Baby Goat Chases Students, Taken Into Custody At Yonkers Playground

dailyvoice.com

109 Upvotes

1 comment

r/nottheonion • u/UnfairSpirit8053 • 16h ago

Microsoft Releases Microsoft Defender For The Linux Desktop

phoronix.com

523 Upvotes

213 comments

r/nottheonion • u/_HGCenty • 11h ago

Mexican traveler nabbed with snakes, lizards at German airport

thepeninsulaqatar.com

192 Upvotes

16 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Fancy-Caregiver-1239 • 8h ago

This surprising mammal fossil is giving scientists something to chew on

npr.org

60 Upvotes

5 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Downtown-Sir-3200 • 17h ago

Tiny dog lands big job in Mexico's National Guard

news.sky.com

200 Upvotes

1 comment

r/nottheonion • u/PlayaSlayaX • 1d ago

After eight years building GTA 6, Rockstar promises its next games will come "more quickly"

pcgamesn.com

3.8k Upvotes

526 comments

r/nottheonion • u/mawcopolow • 21h ago

AI agents on Tencent's cloud read the investigation into them, then politely ask the investigators for help

maccus.fr

300 Upvotes

12 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Ok-Medium-6868 • 1d ago

Marx Campaign Touts Poll Showing a Tie With Weiser, Omits That It's Only in CO's Reddest District

coloradotimesrecorder.com

650 Upvotes

27 comments

r/nottheonion • u/AlwaysBlaze_ • 1d ago

Rick Tocchet says Flyers defensemen are ‘too horny’ on the ice

broadstreethockey.com

409 Upvotes

44 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Perdix_Icarus • 1d ago

US Navy turns 251: American politicians use photos of Indian, Russian warships

indiatoday.in

4.0k Upvotes

116 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Mewsyk • 2d ago

Left-wing candidate Hitler Mussolini wins local vote in Peru

euronews.com

6.9k Upvotes

149 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Supersmashbrosfan • 1d ago

Louisiana Senator Declares At Barn Party: 'Mike Rogers Pisses Excellence'

home.mirs.news

279 Upvotes

49 comments

r/nottheonion • u/NicolasCageFan492 • 2d ago

Experts urge parents to prepare kids for possible livestreamed execution

apnews.com

11.8k Upvotes

1.8k comments

r/nottheonion • u/AdvancedInstruction • 2d ago

Idaho voters will choose an official state gun from 6 firearms on the November ballot

mynorthwest.com

4.4k Upvotes

756 comments

r/nottheonion • u/TitusTesla117 • 1d ago

‘It’s just a free for all’: LoDo neighbors want city to crack down on exploding hot dog carts

businessden.com

486 Upvotes

96 comments

r/nottheonion • u/MatriceJacobine • 2d ago

Female AI agents paid less than male agents for the same work

cybernews.com

2.0k Upvotes

153 comments

r/nottheonion • u/GenericKittyKat • 2d ago

Grand Prairie ISD cancels ‘Little Shop of Horrors’ after casting female student as male lead

wfaa.com

1.8k Upvotes

203 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Supersmashbrosfan • 2h ago

Casey Anthony Appears to Sound Off on Shane Gillis Following ‘SNL’ Monologue, Tells Men to ‘Do Better’

intouchweekly.com

0 Upvotes

40 comments

r/nottheonion • u/PikachuWithHerpes • 2d ago

Woman allegedly Groped By Robot In Germany

ndtv.com

732 Upvotes

108 comments

r/nottheonion • u/QuantumQuicksilver • 2d ago

Robot Groped Teen in Cologne, Police Probe Two Owners

verity.news

337 Upvotes

44 comments

r/nottheonion • u/UGMadness • 2d ago

Salt Lake City florist pushes to remove bike route after close call

fox13now.com

1.0k Upvotes

155 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Downtown-Sir-3200 • 9h ago

Man has eaten 5,000 species of insects

indiatoday.in

0 Upvotes

11 comments

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r/nottheonion

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1. Do not alter headlines; copy and paste.	The title of all submissions needs to match the article headline exactly. Copy and paste from the main headline only, do not include anything beyond the primary headline such as byliners, subtitles, flavor text, quotes from the article, news outlet, location, cross post tags, (video) tags, and so on. Do not use the “suggest title” option for posting as it often does not match the headline. As a matter of fairness, any submission with an altered title will be removed. The only exception is that, if an article has a title in all caps, you may change the capitalization to title case, but everything else must remain the same.
2. Submit only if “Oniony”.	Please consider submitting your article to /r/OffBeat or similar subreddits unless it truly reads like The Onion wrote it. The title and article itself must both be "Oniony". This can be highly subjective; you are encouraged to upvote articles that should be here and downvote those that should not. Moderators can also remove posts at their own discretion under this rule. More here
3. Must be a news article.	Submissions must be in the form of a news article. Videos are only allowed if they are accompanied by a complete text article. Editorials, blogs, twitter posts, image galleries, tabloid stories, youtube videos, meta posts, static images, articles with fewer than 5 sentences, and so forth will be removed.
4. Use original, reliable sources.	Find the source of your story before you submit it, simply by checking for references or googling the subject to locate the original piece. Websites that frequently re-host viral news stories or contain misleading information are on automatic removal. Blogs are not reliable sources.
5. Do not repost similar articles.	Check the sub for your story before you submit it; if it’s already here then please vote and comment there instead of posting another version. Similar stories will be removed and frequent re-posters will lose their posting privileges. Do not delete and repost your own submissions without approval.
6. No satire articles.	Even if they are technically from a source other than The Onion, any article submission written as satire or even true stories written in a satirical manner are not allowed. Please note that some major news outlets have satirical sections, such as the Borowitz Report on the New Yorker, which are also not allowed. Meanwhile, AVClub, while owned by The Onion, is not satire and is allowed. If you'd like, you can use a tool like http://realorsatire.com/ to see if your submission is from a known satirical website.
7. No tabloid journalism.	Do not post tabloid news stories, or articles that source from tabloid news outlets (TheSun, Mirror, Dailymail, People, TMZ, etc).
8. No old news.	Articles need to have been written within two weeks of its submission date.
9. English articles only.	Please do not post non-English articles. Do not use google translate for submission either; rather try to find an English version of the story by a secondary source.
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11. No blocked, redirected, or tracked links.	Please ensure you aren’t submitting a link that utilizes a paywall, survey wall, or pop-over of any kind in order read the complete article uninterrupted. Do not submit links that redirect you to another site to read the article and do not submit using link shorteners either. Additionally make sure you remove any Urchin Tracking Modules from your links as well.
12. No personal attacks, racism, sexism, or bigotry	Keep comments civil and avoid attacking other users directly. No racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, etc.
13. Don’t break Reddit rules.	This should be self-explanatory. Don’t break site-wide rules. Violators will be permabanned. This does include deliberately spreading misinformation.
14. No Self Submissions and/or Official Accounts.	Submissions must come from readers, not from the journal itself. Submissions from official promotional accounts are not allowed here. (Commenting is fine though)

Click here to view a list of sites deemed unreliable by our moderator team.

See our FAQ page for more information on our rules.

Keep all comments civil.

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For more information, click here.