I lit a candle in remembrance of my miscarriage. October is infant/child loss awareness month, they say to light a candle on the 15th at 7pm.

It’s been so hard. I cry and think about my baby often. I lost them before I found out their gender. Their nickname was Goat (for the year of the Goat, they would’ve been born in). Their name was either going to be Vincent or Daphne. I miss you Goat, I’ll love you forever.

My heart goes out to all of us that are hurting and missing a loved one ❤️

Had my D&C two days ago (was 8+2 but baby had stopped growing a few days after I saw the heartbeat at 6+1) and I am just gutted. I feel like a shell. I don’t want to see my best friends because I can’t stand the look of pity. Everything people are saying to comfort me is just pissing me off. I screamed in the shower for 30 minutes today that I want my baby back. I usually have such strong faith but we had a 5+2 loss in August and then immediately conceived this baby only to have this happen and i am just angry. I don’t want to go in public and see pregnant women or babies. I hate feeling so bitter 😭but how will I get through it? I got a facial yesterday, I bought myself new Birkenstocks I’d been eyeing for a while, my husband and I splurged on steak and sushi last night, but I just feel numb. We bought a Honda pilot for me last year in anticipation of needing the third throw and I even want the fucking car gone.

How do you guys move on from this? What if I never want to try again? I can barely eat. My sleep is shit. I got sober 8 years ago but good god I want to drink again 😭 I won’t but the thoughts are there.

My coworker is excited because she has a scan later today to find out the gender of her baby. My “good news” of the day is that my nurse confirmed my miscarriage was complete and my HCG dropped 98% since it was last tested.

I’m absolutely gutted. I can’t stop crying. This feels so unfair.

I’m really really struggling. Still waiting for my cycle to come back and I’m just so angry. It should be us too, we should be on mat leave together, it should never have gone this way. Now I’m just so resentful and envious and fucking angry.

I was so excited about this pregnancy. Was due in May and couldn’t wait to give my older kiddo a brother or sister….. well all those dreams vanished when I went to my ultrasound at 8 weeks to see a gestational sac and yolk sac, no fetal pole. They said it’s possible I could have just been earlier, they said I was looking more like 5 weeks, if still viable. Rechecked again in 2 weeks and there was no growth, saw just the gestational sac, empty. It really broke me in pieces. I went to the hospital yesterday and took mifepristone, and I am about to take misoprostol (Cytotec) now. I’m so nervous and still kind of in denial. Please share some positive stories of conceiving after miscarriage… I want to try again soon but now I’m terrified of a recurrence…

Went in for first OB appointment in the public health system yesterday, should have been 7w4 but measured 6w4 with no heartbeat. Had a scan at 6w2 and the fertility clinic that measured 5w5 but with heartbeat. I was concerned about the size (Dr wasn't though) and I guess I just never felt....convinced?

I'm not sure if that's normal. But it's like on some level my body knew it wasn't the one? I'm quite supersticios and look for "signs" everywhere (probably anxiety ha) and I wasn't seeing "good" signs. I know it sounds really stupid, it probably is, but I really felt it.

Went today for the medication, and am going through the process. Then I found out an hour ago it was Baby Loss Awareness week and today is the final day. I find out just before 7pm local time, the first unlit candle I picked up off the shelf is called "unicorn dreams" and I'm just staring at it, thinking "wow this really does feel like a sign". Not sure what it means, but it's a sign of something....

Anyway I'm just feeling lonely I have nobody to talk to about this, and feeling a bit crazy taking about signs.... Did anybody else have this sort of feeling?

Sending hugs to anyone else going through this on this very pertinent day. Thanks for reading my ramble...

I’m having a D&C done in the morning after a missed miscarriage. I found out last Monday and I was able to get it done the next day but not by my doctor so decided to wait for her availability and I am extremely nervous. I’m getting a “mild sedative” which I’m absolutely terrified of and also scared of complications. I am naturally a very anxious person and I think of the worst possible scenarios so I’m seeking advice with those who can share their positive experiences ❤️‍🩹

I should also say that a lot of my anxiety comes from a acquaintance of mine who unfortunately passed away from a hysteroscopy complication last year and though they are not the same, I know they are quite similar and I have just gone down a rabbit hole that I can’t get out of!!!!

I’m just having a hard time. One day I’ll talk about it like it’s fine. Other days I want to explode but I just can’t. Today I just cried. No one around me truly understands, and how could they? I didn’t even have the chance to tell everyone I was pregnant. I’m trying to keep myself busy so I don’t think about it constantly, but it feels unfair to my baby.

I still have the pregnancy line on my stomach. It’s a reminder that I lost him. I lost him. I still count the days and the weeks. Life just continues to go on, doesn’t it?

Well my first day back to work didn’t go as planned. I’m 5 days post D&C for my 10 week Missed Miscarriage and was finally feeling good enough to go in. Barely bleeding, feeling enough like myself to take on the day. I got about half way through the day and started cramping like crazy and then began bleeding like a lot. Enough to soak 2 overnight pads, the toilet, my pants, the floor.

I started feeling very weak and lightheaded so I told my coworker and then it was a mad dash to the ER because I turned so pale I looked gray, sweating so much I soaked my clothes, so shakey I couldn’t stand, uncontrollably sick, and my HR was in the 170s, BP super low. ER took me right in. Turns out there’s some retained tissue but not a lot and they are confident it’s passing on its own so no need for another D&C. The OB on call said my labs were stable enough to not need blood and sent me home.

Now I’m just in limbo I guess. Still bleeding heavily and passing huge bits of tissue. My boss doesn’t want me to come back tomorrow (can’t blame him). Cramping like I’m in labor and bleeding so heavily I’m having to change pads every hour. I’m miserable and feeling super down because I finally felt like I was at a point to get back to my life.

I’ve had a previous D&C and never had this experience. I just bled lightly for about a week and was back to normal. Anybody else have an experience like this?

I had a MMC a month ago today. I was technically 13 weeks pregnant but baby stopped growing at 8w1d. I had a d&c due to it had already been some time baby was inside me to prevent sepsis. I bled the entire 2 weeks up until my post op appointment. Did an ultrasound and showed retained tissue, opted to try miso that was extremely brutal and painful that was unsuccessful so had a repeat d&c 8 days ago and bleeding wore off for 3 days but has been back now and still passing clots. I’m concerned I still have tissue left and my pregnancy tests are still reading positive but with a faint line. My appointment isn’t until next Wednesday to get another ultrasound and I’m just wondering if anyone else has experienced this and what the outcome was? For context this was a partial molar pregnancy so I have to get hcg draws for the foreseeable future.

I don’t know if others have felt this way and if it’s normal, but when I was pregnant I had this feeling I wasn’t alone. I was looking forward to my partner and I being a family. There wasn’t just going to be two of us anymore, we were growing to a family of three. Every morning I would talk to my baby in my belly, letting it know there are so many people who are excited to meet them and there is so much love waiting for them. Now after the miscarriage, I feel a sense of emptiness and loneliness. It’s a little hard to describe but I guess it’s a changed mindset. While pregnant, I watched what I ate and was more aware of what I could and couldn’t do. Now, post pregnancy, it feels like it doesn’t matter cause now I’m looking out for just me again. Does anyone else feel that way?

In March i found out I was pregnant for the first time only to discover at 8 weeks the baby didnt develop. I dealt with so much medical trauma of finding out at our first ultrasound. It was so devastating to expect to see your baby's heartbeat but instead you get told nothing developed but the gestational sac.

I tested positive a few weeks ago and my hope was so quickly dashed out by low and barely rising HCG. My doctor suspects ectopic pregnancy. Another traumatic ultrasound where its basically confirmed no baby, potentially ectopic and likely an ovarian cyst.

I just feel so hopeless and defeated and terrified.

My husband and I have been trying to conceive for 9 months now. I have seen my first two lines this month and we were both so happy! I got to 5 weeks and 2 days.

Alas, I started to feel strange yesterday and this morning, but was trying to convince myself everything is normal as many people have these symptoms. However, my bleed has started now and the cramping got worse. I’m pretty sure that’s it for this pregnancy! Just sitting here all alone at home waiting for a callback from the doctors within the next two hours. So heartbreaking.

Hi,

My wife is 40 years old, and we had been trying to conceive for a few months before she finally got pregnant. This is her first pregnancy, and everything seemed to be going well so far. She had the usual early pregnancy symptoms, including nausea.

However, at around 10 weeks, she noticed a small amount of brown spotting when wiping after using the bathroom. This continued into the second day.

Last night(the second day), she experienced abdominal pain that was significantly more severe than her usual period cramps and lasted throughout the night. When she went to the bathroom, she passed red blood, along with two pieces of tissue or clot-like material during two separate visits. She described them as looking like “lumps of meat.”

Does this sound like a miscarriage?

Sunday morning I found out I was pregnant. Very shortly beforehand, my husband and I discussed that now isn’t the time for us to be trying and we should hold off. Not even two days later, I did my routine monthly test and there was the positive. We were so shocked and so excited all in the same breath! A few days of bliss and excitement just giggling about the future.

Come Wednesday, I began to bleed pretty heavily and had some persistent cramping. We went to the ER where they did the standard: a vaginal ultrasound which showed a sac but no baby. Blood draw which said HCG showed at 69. Pelvic exam with heavy bleeding. They sent me home with instructions to come back on Friday for a repeat draw. They said it “could be a miscarriage or it could go on to be a healthy pregnancy, it’s just too early to tell” Today, I passed a large amount of firm tissue, I’ve continued to bleed like a period, and the most recent test I took is very faint. While I’ll still go in tomorrow for the repeat draw and the smallest amount of hope, I think I’m confident that we’ve lost it and I almost want to avoid it.

Feeling so emotionally exhausted, with it being 4 days after we found out it makes me wonder if it’s even real? If I wouldn’t have taken my routine test I probably would’ve chalked the whole thing up to a usual period and spared us the heartache. But I’m also grateful to know about this little life so we can celebrate it accordingly. From going to making our minds up to stop trying, to a day later getting the positive, to three days later most likely losing little baby. Just feeling so many different feelings and everything has happened so fast.

Hi there,

Yesterday I found out I had a missed miscarriage with my first pregnancy at 28yo. I went in, and what should have been measuring at 9w+3d was measuring at 7w+3 days with no cardiac activity. My husband and I are devestated, but I also find myself so scared of what’s to come. I opted for the D&C, but yet to hear from schedulers when that will be. I guess my question is how long did it take you to naturally miscarry? Since it’s been 2 weeks of no baby, I guess I am wondering if it will start before my D&C.

My heart is with this group going through this. I had never expected this to hurt so much, and also feel so lonely. I am very grateful to find this.

Background: I had very light brown spotting around 6 weeks. Went in for ultrasound and baby measured a few days small, but had a strong heartbeat. Brown spotting never really stopped but since my OB told me it was probably due to cervix sensitivity, never thought twice about it again.

Has anyone bled on and off after their d&c??? My first miscarriage i just bled but this one some days it’s nothing then some it’s a lot??? Does anyone have this too or know why?

25, going through an incomplete miscarriage and looking for reassurance from people who've been through it.

Baby stopped developing ~Aug 28, diagnosed Sept 4

Misoprostol Sept 12: passed a lot of clots/sac and baby

Misoprostol again vaginally Sept 26: increased cramping but no increased bleeding

Sept 22 ultrasound: 1.0×1.6×1.1 cm retained tissue

Oct 13 ultrasound: persistent spot ~1.2×1.3×1.4 cm with "focal area of increased vascularity" — suspicious for contained products of conception

No longer bleeding, no smell or discharge

hCG:

•

Aug 10 — 26,411

•

Sep 9 — 15,705

•

Sep 24 — 59

•

Oct 7 — 8

•

Oct 15 — <5 (negative!)

My doctor wasn't overly concerned — said retained tissue is common, it could shed with my periods, and no symptoms is reassuring. OB referral for a second opinion, initial consult Oct 19.

Two questions:

1.Had retained vascular tissue with negative hCG that resolved on its own, or did you need a D&C?

2.When did your period come back after hCG hit negative, or in general with misoprostol? I am only finding info on d&c.

I’m wondering if anyone else has been through something like this because I feel like I’m in the strangest limbo.

This is an IVF pregnancy from a day-5 PGT-A euploid embryo, so my dates are exact. My early betas initially looked great, then slowed dramatically and eventually essentially plateaued around 3,000 (only rose 5% in a 48 hour period) and then we stopped testing hcg a few weeks ago when we moved to ultrasound.

On my ultrasounds, we initially saw a gestational sac but nothing definitive inside it. There was maybe a structure that could have been a yolk sac, but no one could say for sure. Did a repeat ultrasound the next week and same thing. So my RE diagnosed it a blighted ovum and we scheduled the MVA procedure.

I went in for the MVA the other day fully expecting the pregnancy to be over. They put me under with anesthesia and when I woke up they told me that they found a yolk sac, fetal pole, and faint heartbeat. So I have to go in for repeat ultrasound now. The heart rate was only about 75 bpm. I can't remember how far behind I'm measuring but I want to say at least a week.

I’m pretty sure this is still going to end in miscarriage, but I feel like I’ve been through the wringer. I’m on week 3 of waiting.

Has this happened to anyone else?

Hi everyone I’m new here. I am 6w4d. Monday I had a Pap smear because it’s my annual check up and what my OB requires before she scheduled my first ultrasound. When I got there, she did it, and I immediately started to bleed. She said vaginas become vascular with pregnancy and not to worry if I see spotting. I was like okay cool. Monday was normal spotting, Tuesday became bright red bleeding. Wednesday was mucousy blood and I changed my pad 3x. I called and they didn’t give me a definitive answer until today. They had me drop everything and get lab work done to check my hcg levels. I’m still bleeding and they said to have bed rest. So I am not going to work tomorrow. I also will be getting for blood work tomorrow to compare. My gut says I’m losing the pregnancy. I haven’t been nauseous at all today and my boobs are becoming way less sore. I’ve slept all afternoon and I feel so very empty inside. I’ll be following along with other’s journeys as I figure out what’s happening on mine.
Thanks for reading.