i have done various forms of martial arts including boxing, kick boxing, bjj, and wrestling.
i have been in quite a few street fights, much less since i quit hanging out at bars and removed shady people from my life. i have won some, lost some, and dis-engaged some.
i am not saying all this to gloat, just trying to give a bit of background and context.
a few days ago i was approached by a drunk guy who was very angry for some reason. he might have been a combination of drunk and mentally ill. he was accusing me of things i did not do and was trying to provoke a fight.
my problem is the way my body and mind was reacting. though i've experienced this in the gym and street many times, internally i was still kind of shitting my pants though my external appearance was stone cold. adrenaline kicked in and my body felt kind of weak, my mind was racing, things were blurry, it was like i was outside of reality in a sense.
though i stood my ground, did not back down, and my mind was still telling me "ok if this guy throws you need to counter and do X", but i did not have a sense of urgency and anger necessary to fight effectively.
he even feinted a punch, i did not flinch but i did not move either. it was like i was kind of frozen just waiting for something to happen while we yelled back and forth.
my question is how do i get rid of this feeling. i have this feeling of weakness and uncertainty now. i want to have the confidence that i will be 100% ready to go when necessary, but am worried about how my mind and body will respond if this happens again in the future.
do i need to do more sparring, or just quit martial arts entirely? i do calisthenics on top of everything regularly so i feel i am fairly strong compared to most people.
any advice would be truly appreciated.