Makes sense, a lot of people I've seen on the internet has had that dog inside them (obedient and loves praise) /j (this is a lie, unfortunately, I generally don't keep track of how much a specific kind of person I find on the internet but the amount of individuals I've seen actually being like this online is anywhere around less than a quarter)
Dawg idk what the fuck happened but that shit really did just kinda explode back into the white community in the last couple years lmao, probably one of my most used words now, right next to "daffodil".
cux dawg (i don't but that's bcz i use specifically dawg to refer to Canus Lupus Familiaris {puppygirl so it'd be more confusing if i used same exact words to refer to dawg and self})
Got downvoted the other day for criticizing someone referring to a trans woman as “this guy” cue 45 comments saying how they totally call cis women guy all the time. I asked if they would describe a woman they sre dating as “this guy I’m dating”
Several people said yes like that not a ridiculous statement
I once asked if, when I point to a woman and a man and say, "Look at that dude," they would ask, "Which one of them?" and one person answered yes, and that was definitely a lie.
I recently got called "Dude" in a feminism sub and the other women just didn't want to accept that she did anything wrong. I started calling her "my man (neutral)" or "damn brother (neutral)" and she got pissed because she didn't want to be called a man. But still tried explaining to me that I just didn't understand the english language, where "dude" and "guy" are neutral, and also she used that wording in a neutral way.
I definitely call cis and trans girls "gender neutral" terms all the time and I do my best not to, it is definitely hard changing vocabulary. I've been trying to cut certain words for a decade. I think it's very easy to forget cis women too can get gender dysphoria from gender neutral terms. I saw a post on some woman dominanted subreddit (idk which one, maybe this one) about bud being masculine, and I'm like fuck, I call the mother of my children bud 😭 another one to remove.
Okay, but I actually will refer to my wife as “guy” or something, especially if it’s part of a common phrase like “get a load of this guy”(hilariously memed meme now btw)
Granted I know her & she knows me so it’s obviously a bit different scenario than using it to strangers online, but point is yeah definitely girls & women get called that IRL without trying to defeminize them or anything
Idk what to tell ya, if you try to tell people X doesn’t happen when numerous people experience it, you’re gonna get a lot of people telling you it happens lol it’s a conversation that will continue ad infinitum
I mean yeah not every time but it feels fairly intuitive to me that if you use a term a lot with a presumed but not quite gender neutral context it will slip out with people you talk to a lot. If you called your girlfriend a guy exclusively that would be weird but this is just how informal language works.
Yep, I'm actively working on not using Dude any more due to the number of other transwomen i hangout with. While it doesn't bother me unless there's clear intent to offend, it does bother some people.
I swear the majority of people that say "Relax I call everyone dude and bro and guy" when you say you dont like being called those terms, never actually do. Maybe they think they do, but at least amongst those people that I've known, they almost never use that terminology with cis women.
I’ve been trying to lessen how much I default to guy and dude with women lately, so now every time I gotta “This guy” somebody that’s not a guy, I’ve gone with “This broad.”
"I misgender people, and if they don't like it, I say sorry and stop." What happened to better safe than sorry? How about we only use terms like "dude" with people we know are okay with it, instead of making people uncomfortable and possibly triggering dysphoria?
Edit: The downvotes are great because they show me that this sub now stands for the idea that it's perfectly okay to trigger dysphoria, and they remind me that this is no longer a trans-inclusive space and that I'd rather stay away in the future
Edit2: The comments deleted by the mod team are piling up. Thanks to the mods for your efforts, but I think this sub is already a lost cause
You're downvoted but you're correct. It's really odd how so many people's response to "a lot of trans women don't like it" is now just "I'm going to change nothing, but if you directly confront me and say to stop doing it then I'll try to stop for you specifically."
I added "try" to the statement because 99% of people who do this have made it a habit and will have a period where they continually slip up and have to apologize (that thing that tends to happen when you try to be trans inclusive but won't actually work on your tendencies).
Do you not think it's othering to be treated differently from cis women? I feel othered if someone calls all women bro except me without me asking. What you're asking for might be nice for some people, but is not nice for others.
That's not what I said though. I said that people want to be trans inclusive without actually changing their habits... Which is why "I'm going to do the thing that a lot of trans women don't like and just have them confront me individually (as if this isn't anxiety-inducing) when they dislike it" is a bandaid solution.
Don't other trans women by clearly using different descriptive words for us specifically, obviously. But why does that person not have to introspect on the fact that they call everyone dude without thinking about it normally? There's a third option there.
Maybe we should stop calling women "bro" in general then?
Isn't it funny how the only "gender neutral" terms like this all just happen to be masculine?
Edit: This being downvoted, but the pick-me shit above being upvoted says a lot about the kind of people that inhabit this supposed trans safe space. Keep taking those inches, I'm sure it'll never become miles.
Additionally, you should exclusively refer to me as “bro” or “dude” in a friendly manner. I think it’d be very respectful to allow me to eat as many “gender neutral” terms as possible 😋
So many deleted comments, and I haven't been fast enough to read a single one, thanks mods! I appreciate the work y'all put in to keep this community light and fun, rather than yucky and serious
Listen, if someone doesn’t want to be called “dude” that’s fine, I won’t call them that, but people’s insistence that “dude” and “guy” absolutely CANNOT be gender neutral is fucking irksome.
I usually use bro for anyone on the internet that I don't know how they want to be reffered as, altough I also often default to "Man" (for example "what are you doing man") but that's due to me being Polish (the Polish language doesn't really do gender neutral) is that bad?
i genuinely use dude as agender cuz english isnt my main language, so how ive been using it, dude is just everyone, although i do understand how it may be uncomfortable for other people, so i should check that even more.
also, i kind of use man as an exclamation, is that bad? like, "man is this thing shit". would that not be ok, for example?
i call people around me dude and bro and man way too much and i have a transfem friend, we talked about it at length but every time i accidentally call her "bro" i add "-ette, -ina," etc... so it's "bruvette" or "bruhina" and she told me she likes it
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