My favorite character that I've ever played was a bear.
Not a bear-person or a shape-shifter, just a literal grizzly bear.
I played D&D 3.5 and put every single skill point I had into Disguise. I took a prestige class as a spy to maximize it. The DM told me that since I was a bear, I couldn't speak common English. So, I maxed out my Bluff skill as well. By growling and gesturing wildly, I could "fake" speaking any language I wanted, convincing people I was just a human with a very thick accent or speaking an exotic dialect.
I used my starting gold to hire a human NPC butler. I bought the butler a magic item that allowed him to speak to animals so he could translate what I was saying.
Through absolute sheer luck and insane dice rolls, nobody ever realized I was a bear. I wore custom, bear-sized tailored suits, a top hat, and a monocle. Everyone just accepted that I was a large, eccentric, and hairy nobleman named Sir Bearington.
The peak of the campaign happened when we attended a high-society royal dinner. One of the royal guests rolls a critical success on his Perception check, looks directly at me, and screams: "THAT'S NOT A NOBLEMAN! THAT'S A FING BEAR!"***
I look at my butler. My butler looks at me. I roar aggressively.
The butler smoothly speaks up: "How dare you insult my master! Sir Bearington is a respected member of the high court!"
I roll for Bluff. Natural 20.
The guards immediately tackle the shouting royal guest, dragging him kicking and screaming from the palace hall because they think he’s gone completely insane. The head of the guard turns to me, bows deeply, and says, "We are so terribly sorry for his behavior, Sir Bearington. Please, enjoy the rest of your evening."
I nod politely and go back to eating my raw fish with a fork.
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u/DukeOfGeek DukeOfGeek 3h ago
Obligatory Sir Bearington copy pasta
My favorite character that I've ever played was a bear. Not a bear-person or a shape-shifter, just a literal grizzly bear. I played D&D 3.5 and put every single skill point I had into Disguise. I took a prestige class as a spy to maximize it. The DM told me that since I was a bear, I couldn't speak common English. So, I maxed out my Bluff skill as well. By growling and gesturing wildly, I could "fake" speaking any language I wanted, convincing people I was just a human with a very thick accent or speaking an exotic dialect. I used my starting gold to hire a human NPC butler. I bought the butler a magic item that allowed him to speak to animals so he could translate what I was saying. Through absolute sheer luck and insane dice rolls, nobody ever realized I was a bear. I wore custom, bear-sized tailored suits, a top hat, and a monocle. Everyone just accepted that I was a large, eccentric, and hairy nobleman named Sir Bearington. The peak of the campaign happened when we attended a high-society royal dinner. One of the royal guests rolls a critical success on his Perception check, looks directly at me, and screams: "THAT'S NOT A NOBLEMAN! THAT'S A FING BEAR!"*** I look at my butler. My butler looks at me. I roar aggressively.
The butler smoothly speaks up: "How dare you insult my master! Sir Bearington is a respected member of the high court!" I roll for Bluff. Natural 20. The guards immediately tackle the shouting royal guest, dragging him kicking and screaming from the palace hall because they think he’s gone completely insane. The head of the guard turns to me, bows deeply, and says, "We are so terribly sorry for his behavior, Sir Bearington. Please, enjoy the rest of your evening." I nod politely and go back to eating my raw fish with a fork.