r/circlejerk • • 6h ago

so you just hold my weiner and i hold yours and we form a circle?

6 Upvotes

wow i can really get into this🤩


r/circlejerk • • 7h ago

Behold the power of GenAI

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19 Upvotes

Artists are gonna hate me for this but maybe they should get good. Look at this image. It’s perfect. And it’s 100% AI generated.


r/circlejerk • • 8h ago

Is it weird to use s3cks toys with your partner?

5 Upvotes

I just simulated two female Barbies p3gging a Ken with a baseball bat and now my wife is on the phone crying with my mom. We are an arranged marriage and have never seen each other nak3d.


r/circlejerk • • 14h ago

whats your opinion on stacking onions ring on your penis(not sexually)

11 Upvotes

i like it its warm and crunchy...🧅🧅🧅- if you need help with anything else let me know!


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

I’m Susan Dell, AMA

19 Upvotes

r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

Europe Decommissioned All Energy Production And Is Now Reliant On Foreign Energy

0 Upvotes

it was a great idea, energy prices are up +100% and net carbon impact completely negligible


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

At McDonald's one of the employees told me he was "finna blast ass" in my diet coke. Do I have to pay extra for that?

2 Upvotes

Please hurry i'm in line and can't make decisions on my own.


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

GTA6 is only 8 hours long

37 Upvotes

I am probably going to get in trouble for breaking NDA but GTA6 is actually only 6-8 hours long. Main story is 6 hours including cinematics. The extra side content adds a maximum 2 hours of additional stuff to do.

People are gonna be pissed.


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

Solved Thanks to Shane Gillus, I'm gonna start going to the jim bum ass naked!

8 Upvotes

r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

My parents abandoned me. My fiance left me at the alter. My dog cheated on me with my sister. The kidnappers called me fat because I didn't fit into the trunk of their car. And my work fired me because the screwdriver I was using to hold the beryllium dome above the plutonium core slipped.

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57 Upvotes

Chef Boyardee and a slice of cheese


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

Am I ugly?

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78 Upvotes

r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

I am The Chosen One. AMA.

0 Upvotes

As I have thusly forespeakened I am The Chosen One. Ask, my childes, if the inner voice seems thee worthy, I shall deign to answer thee.


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

I vibe-coded a game about vibe-coding

13 Upvotes

I vibe-coded a game about vibe-coding where you play as an anti-vibe-coding vibe-coder and use a vibe-coding arm computer to vibe-code weapons that you use to vibe-code other vibe-coders to death. Once you infiltrate and finish disabling the vibe-code underground base Vibe-Codeia you use their vibe-code mainframe to vibe-code a massively powerful vibe-AI and vibe-instruct it to kill you and your vibe. It then goes on to govern humanity and vibe-blast any new would-be vibe-coders that enter the scene. The sequel will be a hentai game.


r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

I used to only be able to fuck fat bitches but now I’ve worked my way up socioeconomically to be able to fuck formerly fat bitches (on ozempic), AMA

19 Upvotes

r/circlejerk • • 1d ago

Shane Gillis is the reason I don't work out

35 Upvotes

I'll never step foot inside a gym because of him


r/circlejerk • • 2d ago

I can’t be friends with guys I’m attracted to

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42 Upvotes

Why are gender dynamics so hard 😩. Im straight but I don’t find most men attractive, maybe 1 out of every 50 or every 100 guys i meet is consider attractive. I’m not looking for a relationship right now but one of my struggles is that I can never be friends with a man that I find attractive. Let’s just say stuff happens lol

A couple weeks ago I met a guy who started taking classes at my pottery studio that I go to. We talked a lot and had a lot of the same interests. He’s someone I actually wanted to be friends with. The issue is that he was HOT and it made me feral

So the other day I was like fuck I need to know what this man looks like naked. We were texted and I asked him to send me a video of him masturbating and one thing led to another and we met up and I gave him oral sex

Uggfghhhheggsg I don’t want a FWB, why can’t I be friends with men

Pic is pierogis


r/circlejerk • • 2d ago

The AI bubble pops, 2027, one of the worst stock market crashes in history.

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65 Upvotes

r/circlejerk • • 2d ago

Tyson McGruffle, Ballerina. Madison, WI.

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0 Upvotes

r/circlejerk • • 2d ago

I’m one of the Russian bots that got killed in the Ukrainian attack on my data center. AMA

230 Upvotes

Fucking Ukrainians killed my girlfriend in server bank A359XCD. AIO? AITA? I don’t know but AMA.


r/circlejerk • • 2d ago

If one pilot gets raptured and Nicholas Cage has to land my plane, auto pilot would probably get us on the ground just fine.

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8 Upvotes

I think I probably would get raptured, I have not spilled seed in over a month.


r/circlejerk • • 4d ago

I believe in "soshalism"

16 Upvotes

Healthcare should be free and China should pay for it. My dog should have free healthcare. Also free drugz like I stabbed my pinky toe last week and it really hurt so a hot man should suck it so it gets better.

No DMs. DMs are closed. CLOSED! VERY CLOSED! DON'T MESSAGE ME.


r/circlejerk • • 4d ago

Grieving the loss of my cat and entire family, but I cannot help but feel betrayed. I raised my cat to be a good Christian, but he goes and joins rebel forces and blows everyone up...feeling unsure if I'll ever get another cat again.

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42 Upvotes

Light breakfast this morning.


r/circlejerk • • 4d ago

Donald Trump to rename "poop" to "Poop of America."

132 Upvotes

If Donald Trump signs this order, you can no longer simply say "I am going to poop in the toilet." You will be required to say "I am going to do a Poop of America in the toilet." This order comes after someone close to the president advised him that he has the authority to rename all forms of excrement: poop, pee, and diarrhea.


r/circlejerk • • 4d ago

Solved I only care about reddequite when it affects me

2 Upvotes

I will gladly pile on to other users with downvotes but if it happens to me I get mad


r/circlejerk • • 4d ago

What are some subtle things that Redditors do that make them 100x hotter?

35 Upvotes

Four me it's