Ok big scary title but let me explain.

Im watching season 3 right now, and twice, TWICE women are shamed and scolded out for not "standing up to" Howie. One Sara even got sent home for it.

This is a big, loud, physical man is a bully. But nooo its both Saras' fault for not saying, no Howie we're doing this.

Now. If you grew up Femme presenting, whether you were aware or not, were conditioned to placate men. We compromise, we step back, we let them have their way. Because its safer. And then people in charge, men in charge, say "well why didnt you fight?" Bc we've been told a man could kill us.

And lets not pretend that almost every woman in a professional kitchen hasnt been threatened, made to feel uncomfortable, even abused, by the men in the kitchen.

I love Tom Colichio but I wish someone had explained it to him this season. I think Howie would have gone home much earlier.