Tonight, my daughter spilled a drink I purposely put out of her way to avoid a disaster. I was feeding my dog, had my back turned, and the drink went everywhere.

I admit, I overreacted. I didn’t yell but had some stern words over it because, it’s the end of the night and I’m ready to just relax. Not pick up a drink.

After I cleaned it up, I realized I over reacted over truly nothing. I went to her and apologized. I told her, “I’m sorry for how I acted when the drink spilled. Sometimes, I’m still learning how to be a mom.”

She looked at me and said, “And I’m still learning how to be me.”

I was floored that she articulated that to me. What a great reminder from a 3 year old that she is still learning how to be a person.

I’m well aware I may get hate from this but, I thought this was too good not to share.

Or is this just a me thing?

I know it's common for it to be impossible to get anything out of them about what they did, how their day went, who they played with etc.

Well my 2 year old has only just started to go to a preschool and while he never seems to remember what activities he did, he will give me a rundown of what all the staff ate for lunch. "Claire had a salmon wrap, Lisa had pears today not nectarines..." Thanks lil dude I really needed to know that!

Does anyone have a kid with mosaic down syndrome?

Since she was born, my baby's almond shaped eyes rose red flags among doctors (4 doctors to be exact). I was in denial since I have almond shaped eyes and my dad's family too. My baby had no other signs but as she started to grow, my alarms turned on. She couldn't keep her mouth shut, she was constantly drooling, she started to crawl until she was 12 months and now that she's 17 months old, I took her to a speech and physical therapist. The therapist said my baby has a little hypotonia, she doesn't obey commands and seems like her attention spam is short. And considering her eyes too, she told me to take a karyotype test for her. I'm taking her this week, but I feel so devasted... I'm scared, I really don't feel good about it.

I want to know if any of you have a mosaic down syndrome baby or know about any. I know it's like a rare type but I want to know what to expect, if it improves or if my baby will be able to do everything other kids does. :(

Thank you.

I have a 3-year-old daughter and today when I picked her up from daycare (a place we love and trust) her teacher let me know that another kid in class was on top of my daughter humping her. The teacher said she talked to them but I was a little too overwhelmed so I didn’t ask follow-up questions. I’m planning on doing that tomorrow at drop off. I want to say first that I know that humping or exploring their bodies is developmentally normal for this age but I’m just spiraling that my daughter was essentially violated even though neither child understands what was happening. I worked at a foster care agency for several years and have seen the worst of the worst so abuse is just such a huge fear of mine. We already talk about safe touch and boundaries and I don’t want to make this more of a thing and actually scare her. I did tell her if someone was in her space and she had already told them no thank you that she could use her hands to push them away (I’m not sure if that was the right thing to say or not). As I mentioned, I’m planning on asking more questions tomorrow and speaking with admin about any policies surrounding stuff like this. Is there anything else I should be doing or saying? I’m having trouble discerning what’s appropriate vs how upset/angry I’m feeling. Would love to hear from anyone that’s been in a similar situation. I don’t shy away from confrontation but I also don’t want to be overly dramatic.

My toddler's jacket went missing again when my husband picked her up at her school today, and the teachers had no idea. My almost 3yo told us that she saw a classmate's dad take it and gave us that girl's name. We asked the teacher to contact that child's parent to check for us, but they refused and said they would ask that parent tomorrow morning.

My kid also lost a nice jacket last year, which made us angry because it was a gift from my best friend. This time, the missing jacket was a gift from my SIL.

I don't understand those parents. If you come home with a piece of clothing that isn't yours, you should know it doesn't belong to your child and bring it back. I guess common sense is not common for those people. We are very upset and plan to escalate this issue tomorrow if they won't do anything about it, especially since this is a large, professional preschool.

P/S: we write our kid name on all school items

Son is just coming up to 28 months, very good vocabulary, only child, no screen, outdoorsy nursery 3 days a week, happy settled home life and routines.

The other week he randomly told me one of the nursery workers hit his head and pinched his tummy, he said whereabouts it took place and the person’s name. I asked him if it was just funny and silly or did it make you feel sad and he said it hurt his body and made him sad. I spoke to nursery manager, they had to follow protocol and investigate… anyway no upshot really but it was very upsetting for the nursery worker all round a bit shit for everyone. He actively adores his nursery and that nursery worker

Today, at home with son who is commando playing with toys and he randomly comes out with ’mummy touch my Willy and mummy touch my bottom‘. mortified. I just replied with ‘well I clean your willy and bottom if you’ve done a poo‘. then he said it again and I said ‘do I?’ and he said ’no only if I’ve got a poo and you wipe wipe‘

So basically 2 main concerns

1 - he will tell nursery that I touch his privates and especially considering the recent investigation and terrible timing they might say they have to report me to social services??!!

2 - if anyone did actually hurt or touch him inappropriately it’s now a bit boy who cried wolf and he might not be believed

Help??!!

This is my first ever experience with this but I can only describe it as an intense meltdown and almost a possessed rage. Tonight I put my toddler to bed 1.5 hours earlier than usual as they didn’t nap today. 20 mins later i got up to get a drink and I heard them crying then almost yelling/crying. I came back to the bedroom and my toddler was thrashing all over the bed screaming, aching back, flinging her arms and legs around, crying, rapid breathing whilst trying to get words out.

i couldn’t underhand a thing that was being wsaid so I just sat next to her trying to reassure and calm them. I underhand everything my child says but this was actual incoherent words.
I didn’t know what to do, we co-sleep so I just thought they were confused about where I was after A brief wakening. I just started apologising saying I was getting some water but I’m here and you’re safe etc. etc. nothing worked, inconsolable. i tried a hug and snuggle but it almost made it worse. The thing that made me really concerned was the next thing I could actually understand hearing them say “I CANT WAKE UP. I CANT WAKE UP”. I held them and said “you’re awake you’re safe mummas here”.

this went on for 15 minutes, they then ran out of the bedroom and started doing the same thing on the couch. I was actually so worried, I got out an icy pole as they’re a favourite treat and i thought it could “wake” them? I didn’t know if that’s something I should even try but they obviously felt distressed about not being awake? but there was no interest in an icy pole. It took me 1 hour to nurse them back to comfort and my mind is blown. I’ve never seen anything like that and I feel I’m a bad mum for not knowing how to handle that.
everything else has been pretty stable, only thing I can think of is that it sounds like they have a tummy bug as there were some mild loose consecutive bowel movements today (5 within an hour) but despite them appearing concerned about it, there were no other symptoms, no temperature etc. I thought maybe a stomach bug? my child is almost 3 and they completely stopped napping a few months ago, however over the last couple of weeks they need a nap again or else night time is chaos. today was a no-nap day so they went to bed 1.5 hours earlier than usual.

Does this sound like a night terror?

My 3 year old son has never laughed. I noticed this very early on as an infant when his missed that milestone. The last 3 years has been us trying to get a laugh out of him with no success. Even if we tickle him, no laugh. He will just either scream, make strange noises, or be completely silent. He does smile though. We’ve addressed this with his pediatrician and he suggested early intervention and neurology. He does have a speech delay, but his speech pathologist said she’s never heard of such a thing. Neurologist doesn’t understand it either and has decided to “keep an eye” on it for now. We’re waiting on autism assessment right now. Only other issue neurology saw was low muscle tone, especially in the legs. She doesn’t wanna do an MRI yet due to the sedation. Has anybody else experienced this at all? It’s not like he doesn’t want to laugh, it sounds like he physically can’t do it.

My almost 2 year old does not care to hug her father. He asks for a hug first thing in the morning and last thing at night. He’ll ask when we leave the house and sometimes randomly. He will start fake crying if she doesn’t hug him. So sometimes she’ll give in, but often not. Or he’ll force it.

I’ve told him to stop and it’s teaching her that her no doesn’t matter. He says as her father, he’s entitled to hugs. I strongly disagree, but he won’t listen. Told me we don’t listen when she says no to not eating veggies and wanting a popsicle instead. Definitely not the same.

What do I do? How bad is this going to effect her?

Was anyone afraid of going from one kid to two? We want another, we have our finances in order and ready to have another (college savings, daycare budget, etc), but I am so scared to disrupt the amazingness that we currently have. Our son is 25 months and this time is so special and fun. I am terrified that I will be so bad at having two kids. Anyone else?

I just moved my son to a new daycare and they do way more messy activities in addition to not using bibs for kids. They’re clearly using some more “organic” materials - I can tell by the muted colors, instead of the super friendly washable paints. So many of his tops are getting stained despite me spraying them with stain treatment when we get home and leaving them to soak in cold water. These are his daycare clothes so they’re purchased with the intent of being rough, but not incredibly stained. But they also let him stain up his shoes, which is annoying as they need to function beyond daycare - and he has “daycare” shoes that actually live there that he could’ve worn during this activity.

It feels slovenly to send him to school with stained clothes, but I’m clearly not going to buy a bunch of new stuff to get messed up. So I guess I’m trying to gauge if it’s ok to send a 2 yr old in clean but stained clothes? It’s clear they’re not going to take precautions to limit stains, so no point in exposing more clothes to the madness?

Also open to laundry tips beyond oxi clean, dish soap, and soaking…

Before having my son, I had a job I enjoyed with great benefits and a flexible schedule. After having him, I offered to work part-time or weekends, but my husband refused because his job isn’t flexible. I ended up staying home, even though that wasn’t what I wanted.
Now, almost two years later, I’m miserable. I barely leave the house, don’t really know anyone here because all my friends/family are in a different state, and feel like I’ve lost my identity. My son is in speech therapy, and social skills is one of the areas he qualified, so I think daycare could potentially benefit him too because he has had 0 interactions with other kids his age and the speech language pathologist said this is probably holding him back in certain areas.
Whenever I bring up working, my husband asks why I’d want to return to a job where I used to get yelled at. When I mention daycare, he says he doesn’t trust other people to take care of our son. The thing is, I have some of those same fears. I don’t completely trust daycare either, and I feel guilty about the idea of leaving my son with other people. But I also know that I’m unhappy staying home, and I don’t think wanting to work makes me a bad mother.
Financially, we’re okay, and my husband says we don’t need the money. He also makes comments that imply I just want a break from our son or don’t want to spend time with him, which makes me feel even guiltier.
I love my son more than anything, but I want to feel independent and like myself again. I don’t necessarily want to work because we need the money; I want to work because I need something for myself, too.
I feel conflicted because I understand his concerns about daycare, and I have my own concerns, but I also feel like my needs are being dismissed. I don’t know how to move forward without feeling guilty.
Has anyone dealt with something similar? How do you balance concerns about daycare with wanting to return to work, especially when your partner doesn’t support the idea? Am I being selfish for wanting this?

It's just breaking my heart. Baby phase and the first 2 years were so magically wonderful to me. She was sooo sweet, a smiling baby, curious to everything. She was cooperative, polite with everyone she met, we just couldn't really believe how adorable she was. And she gave us so much love every single day!!! We really were the world to her.
Don't get me wrong, I exactly knew this wasn't gonna last forever and toddler phase would eventually come. And it did. Now, at almost 3, she's much different: a lot of times still cute and nice, but most of the day just asserting her will, be it a nice or a less nice way. That's all normal and necessary for her development, I know.

What worry me are MY feelings. Of course I love her, but you know the difference between the love you feel for someone who's always nice to you and cheers up when they see you and listens to your advice and is happy to play with you no matter what you offer them - and someone who actually gets mean to you, not always happy to see you just noticing you're there and moving on.. doesn't always like to listen to your advice and it's completely unpredictable if she'll like what you offer to do or start whining about it. You still love her, she's your child, but when she's hitting you because she didn't get something, it's hard to feel the same as when she was that adorable peanut following and hugging you.
I miss my little baby and I miss my little 1-2 year old! I know many people decide to have another child because of this, to re-live that phase, but I don't think that would wipe my memories about the first child. (plus people say it's also not a very good reason to have another)
Will I ever feel the same overwhelming love about her again? Does it ever get so lovely as those first years or is that it?
Please help me. I have noone to talk about it because everyone's answer is something like yeah yeah but look how much more she can do now, bla bla bla. My husband likes this era a million times more than the baby one. So I feel so lonely with this and while I'm getting her ready to go out and handling her protest, I'm starving for that feeling that fills my heart with neverending joy and love and grace. Not gonna lie, if I had a magic wand, I'd turn her into a baby again, if only for a couple of hours.
I suppress it all every single day and just focus on the positive moments but suddenly, on this random Thursday, I got sooo tired of supressing and I'm drowning in my tears.
Thank you.

edit: I'm reading all your comments, just don't have the power yet to reply all. I'm so grateful to all of you! Some of you even made me cry. Thank you. I'll try to find my flamingo needs. ♥️

I’m a mom to a 3-year-old little boy. For background, I’m 27 but often told I look much younger. Because of this, I sometimes feel judged, especially in these situations.

My son has about 20 words and has been in speech therapy since he was 18 months old. I advocated for him and wanted him to receive services before his pediatrician even mentioned it. He got ear tubes less than six months ago and has made so much progress from that alone.

Now that he’s transitioning from Early Intervention to therapy through our school district, he had to go for an evaluation. The communication just to get the ball rolling with the next step was very poor, and I wasn’t provided paperwork on time. Because of this, he’s had a gap in services.

I feel shamed and gaslit because they love to point out that services are “optional,” but then often make remarks about how he’s had a two-month gap in services, which wasn’t my doing. Also, now that he’s following a school schedule, even though services continue at home, he’s going to have gaps in services either way.

For starters, the evaluation involved a speech therapist, a special education teacher, and a therapist performing a psychological evaluation. I felt overwhelmed and like I wasn’t even able to fully go over all of his skills in such a short period of time.

They put us in a room full of toys with a divider separating us from another child who was receiving speech therapy. I was first met by the speech therapist, and then the other two showed up. They had all texted me the same date and time, and I had communicated that my son was having his speech evaluation that day and that the other two therapists also wanted to join.

The speech therapist didn’t even know they were showing up and seemed annoyed, telling them they should have texted her. Again, another example of the poor communication.

When my son had his first evaluation, it was much more organized, less overwhelming, and involved much kinder therapists who actually took what I said into consideration instead of writing me off.

This evaluation was a mess. They were flooding my son with toys, so all he wanted to do was play. Then they were getting upset when he wouldn’t demonstrate certain skills, like pointing to a body part.

I told them about all of his skills but felt very written off. They explained that because certain things were “self-reported,” he would score lower. They also reassured me that it wasn’t that they didn’t believe me. I never said they didn’t believe me in the first place, so it felt very condescending.

The speech therapist was the most condescending. I felt like she questioned everything I told her about my child. For example, I mentioned that he makes great eye contact, and she responded, “I’m not seeing that.” We had only been there for about three minutes at that point! Then, anytime he made eye contact, she pointed it out.

I also explained that his eye contact is documented in the notes from the therapist he’s been seeing for the last year and a half, twice a week. However, they didn’t have access to her notes because I wasn’t given a release form until I was literally walking out after the evaluation was finished, which I then had to mail to them.

The entire experience felt extremely overwhelming, and I felt completely written off. Everything my child did was noted, and it really upset me.

I’m not upset that he needs speech services. That’s literally why I’m here! I’m upset about how we were both treated, and it was honestly really hard to keep my cool. I wanted to cry out of frustration.

Outside of his speech delay, I haven’t noticed concerns in other developmental areas, and neither has his previous speech therapist. Even if he did have delays in other areas, I still don’t think the way they treated us was appropriate.
They’re supposed to be doing their jobs, but I can’t help wondering how parents of children with more significant developmental delays or diagnosed disabilities are treated during these evaluations.

I even mentioned how, at his first evaluation at 18 months, the physical therapist brought up that he seemed to have low muscle tone. I was explaining how his pediatrician had never mentioned anything about it before, and they all jumped in to tell me how doctors don’t know about that.

I never denied that he could have low muscle tone! I was simply explaining that his first evaluation was the first time it had ever been brought to my attention.

Am I wrong for thinking the whole evaluation was BS? I understand that I need to go through this process to continue my son’s services, but it still upsets me.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

Just another one of those post. My 2.5 started daycare this week, today is her third day and I know it’s normal for them to cry at drop off. By second day, the teacher said she stopped crying throughout the day.It’s the sadness that gets to me, we pick her up, and she just silent cries in our arms. At bedtime, she keeps saying she doesn’t want to go to school and tears goes down her face, same in the morning. She complies with going to the car, walking to the school, while saying in her sad voice with tears “I don’t want to go to school, I want to go home.” I tell her mommy and daddy has to work, she can play with her friends, eat muffins at school but she just tells me she doesn’t want to play with her friends.

Daycare doesn’t give update throughout the day, I honestly have no idea what they do exactly besides eat, go outside, and dance to music. At pickup, daycare just tells us she did good. We have to ask if she ate or nap.

I think she is also holding in her poop, she gets home, tells us to leave her alone. Once we are allow back in her space, we noticed she poop and it’s such a large amount where its definitely seem like she didn’t poop at school.

Is this normal update from the teacher and how do I help my toddler overcome this sadness?

My 14 month old has HFM. Currently waiting to see if my 3 year old will get it (I’m sure he will). This is dramatic, but nothing prepared me for how gross I would feel about this. I already don’t like germs and struggle with contamination ocd. I know this is a part of parenthood and that’s fine I can deal. I just want to whine about it for a minute. My son hasn’t stopped his stream of drool for 4 days now. So for days I have been covered and coated in HFM tainted drool. Everything he touches is tainted and I can’t keep up with cleaning it all. Also I didn’t realize the blisters POP AND OOZE. So now not only is the drool everywhere, but we’ve added HFM blister juice into the mix. I feel disgusting. I feel like the house and toys will never be clean again. Especially since apparently this can hang out in their saliva for 1-3 weeks post infection (if I’m reading the information I’ve seen correctly)?? How the fuck am I suppose to keep up with Clorox wiping everything for the next 3 weeks?

If you read the whole thing thanks for letting me complain. Obviously we will carry on and it’s not that bad. I’m just in the thick of it and feel the impending doom of waiting for my 3 year old to get it.

Our (newly) 3 year old's bedtime is taking forever.

We always do the same routine: bath, pajamas, brush teeth, 3 books, and then lights out. We use Hatch color changing to show him when it's time to get into bed and for the lights to go out. We have always stayed with him until he falls asleep, which until about 4 months ago, took about 30 mins. We could leave the room and he'd usually sleep through the night without any issues.

Now we are lucky if he falls asleep within 2 hours of starting the bedtime routine.

If he skips his nap, his behavior in the evenings is pretty rough. He'll be extra wound up and impulsive. But, he falls asleep quickly. If he takes a nap (even if it's capped at an hour), he will take 2-3 hours to fall asleep. If we leave, he panics. Cries and hyperventilates. We are not going to let him do that. But how can we help him fall asleep faster? Or at least feel safer by himself in his room? Daycare is required to offer him a nap so we can't always skip it. Help. 🫠

When my toddler has to poop, she runs to a hiding spot then lies down on her stomach to poop. I didn’t question it much since her poop is healthy and she is healthy but now we are potty training her. It was pretty easy getting her to pee in a potty because she naturally squats when she pees anyway. But pooping in a potty weirds her out because she wants to lie down to do it. Any advice?

My daughter is around 2½ now and my biggest concern is she wonders everywhere. She wont stand next to me or stay still.

I try holding her hand but the moment she sees somthing she likes she tries to let go and if I dont let go she will fall too her butt. Thats when I just pick her up and hold her despite her being upset. Any events we try and go too if I try to get her too stay with me she instantly tries to go too other tables or people.

Im trying stranger danger but I also dont want her terrified of everyone.

Any advice would be appreciated..

My 3yo refuses to answer questions. Both broad ones and yes/no ones. She definitely knows that she is expected to answer, and what yes and no mean (unlike some posts I see about 2 yr olds who are learning what that means). She just refuses to do it. And I'm talking even low stake questions she would certainly immediately benefit from answering like "do you want a banana?" Or "do you want me to put XYZ on the tv?" It's BAFFLING.

And nobody will tell me if this is normal or not. Pediatrician, teachers, other parents, etc... Is this normal?! It drives me INSANE.

Hi everyone!

Our family will be headed to Hawaii with our two kids, toddler will be 2.5 and baby will be 6 months. I’m wondering most what do to about car seats and strollers. We will be renting a car at the airport so I’m thinking bringing car seats is the best option, looking into buying two of the cosco scenera as I don’t really want to pack up our nunas. Toddler will have own seat on the plane and baby will be lap sitting, is it better to check both car seats or bring one on the plane for toddler?

I’m also really unsure about what stroller situation is best. We have 3 strollers currently: uppababy vista, which is way too bulky for travel, a side by side bombi double, and a joie nutmeg single travel stroller. I’m debating either just bringing the bombi and checking that even though it’s huge, bringing just the joie single and letting the kids take turns (either having toddler walk or wear baby in the carrier when necessary), or buying two single umbrella strollers.

Any thoughts would be appreciated, as well as advice for the trip! It’ll be our first time doing a 4+ hour flight with two kids so I’m a little nervous. Thanks in advance everyone!

My son just turned 2 this past July. While he has had some tantrums and meltdowns it seems like they’ve really ramped up in the last month. It’s like everything lately triggers him: mealtime, not being able to have his pacifier, losing a toy, coming home from being out, etc. he start going to preschool 5 days a week and when I’ve asked the teachers haven’t mentioned anything about the tantrums or his behavior, but when he comes home it’s like an unhinged animal. He refuses dinner, won’t let my husband or I eat dinner because he wants something or wants to play. He had a 30 min meltdown tonight because we refused to give him his pacifier (it’s only for bedtime) and he threw his plate of food, threw toys, threw my phone etc. it’s been more or less like this during the evenings and it’s extremely draining. My husband and I both work full time and we’re just beat by the end of the day. I felt terrible because I just lost my sh*t and screamed at my son’s face when he was melting down because I literally just didn’t know what else to do.I’m also currently pregnant with #2 and all I can think about is how am I going to survive this and do it again with another kid.

I’ve also decided to get him evaluated by a speech therapist to see if his inability to express himself fully can be contributing to this behavior (he has a hard time stringing together 2 word phrases)

I don't know if other parents feel this but as someone with already a lot of anxiety about health & death before having a kid, having a kid has amplified a lot of my worries about the future. It terrifies me to think not only about dying early but even in the long term when one day when us parents will not be around when my daughter is an adult. At this stage, we (and everybody here) are so entrenched with our caregiving duties that I can't even imagine a world where we don't exist anymore.

I am seeing a therapist but curious if others have felt this kind of fear or anxiety. This perspective is probably warped by our intense love for our toddlers at this stage & the around the clock care and attention we are giving them 😄