Since I am a bit newer to stoicism, I keep having so many questions. Hope it's okay to discuss here.

I currently am looking for a new job (after a layoff, corporate, tech PR/comms), and at the same time I'm learning/reading stoicism as I feel like I need some guidance in life, otherwise it's difficult. Stoicism seems to make most sense to me, I find it to be quite clear. I read and then I kind of understand what to do.

And lately, or I guess today specifically after receiveing yet another rejection letter, I've been wondering... how can I better apply the stoic principles to looking for/getting a new job?

It is a thing I both can and can not control, right? I can put in the honest diligent work (searching and applying) and hope in the end it works out for me but I cannot control the outcome. But you see, when you keep being rejected it's difficult to be chill about it.

You see, also, the job market is tough yes, and I do believe I am not delusional about myself - I have certain strengths but also I'm not like wow amazing, and it's not like any company would chase me...no, I am quite average, really.

I like this food banquet comparison - like don't be obsessed with getting your plate asap just wait for your turn. But so do I just wait for a new job? I mean keep applying and waiting... What if it doesn't arrive anytime soon? Do I convince myself that the fate decided that it's better this way?

Anyway, sorry, this may read chaotic but at least it's not AI, but I guess what I am asking is... how to keep the upbeat and go-getter attitude amidst all this rejection?

As the title says... I been feeling a little sad and depressed seeing how the many friendships i made across college, especially my inner circle of best friends, with whom i feel as if we were part of the very same family fade away. I met most of them during the second year of college, and since then we only became closer between all of us. It is a friendship founded on virtue, and i like them for what they are and always wanted to do good in their lives as they did in mine... But nowadays our friendship has been getting diluded like dirt in the water, some of us graduated, some of us returned home, some stayed within the city of our college, and some decided to keep studying something else to fulfill their lives. I'm the second kind, i returned home and got a job, but while i was making coffee this very afternoon i said "oh man -F- would love to hear this!" And then i got reminded that she's not by my side anymore like we all used to be (we almost shared entire days together)... As i'm writing this i'm crying over the past, over it's bittersweetness, because i'm gratefull everything went the way it did, but i get sad over how fortune made us part ways... We are still very much in contact but it's not as easy to have everyone around for a hangout like we used to...and i was looking for advice on how to understand this... All of it (sorry for my english it's not my main language as you may see)

Hello I have been reading through On The Shortness Of Life by Seneca and though I enjoy the writing and have been learning a lot from stoicism in general but there is a element of it that I have had a tough time absorbing. It is the critique of things that feel so very human to me and a part of this life that makes it so valuable. That is passions. I understand when referred to by the ancient stoics they refer to our more carnal and indulgent desires like gluttony, sex, Etc.(I also understand that Seneca is considered by many a hypocrite and that some of the things he said are to be taken with a grain of salt but I am speaking a little more generally) but they also seemingly critique things like throwing yourself completely into art, history, music, hosting, and several other things that I find I have a deep connection with that is more than me simply giving into indulgent habits. I understand that these texts were written in an old and very different world but I can’t help getting stuck when I get to sections of texts like this. Especially with Seneca. It seems like he goes down the list of everything that can be enjoyed by humanity and casts it all down as useless and it creates a lot of conflict in my mind around stoicism.

Another thing that I have difficulty comprehending, that was more common in Discourses which I also read recently, was this view that weeping for the loss of those you love is also a thing to be avoided and something not good for reasonable thinking. This is something that I could just be taking at face value and perhaps Epictetus is critiquing the refusal of letting your reason still control your action through painful experiences and thoughts instead of falling into a a puddle of tears and refusing to swim out but I still feel like it need some assistance with understanding.

This is just a more personal thing but I think weeping is one of the greatest gifts we have as people. I am grateful to have things to weep for in life. When someone I love dies I have reason to weep because I have lost someone so valuable to me that there is nothing that can be done to fill that hole in my heart left by their absence and all that is left to do is to submit to a state of pure feeling and to weep. Of course I won’t let that cloud over my own virtue and reasonable thinking but weeping is something that I think makes us so human.

I remain open minded to all advice and I do not wish to poke a hole in stoicism or anything because I think it is a beautiful philosophy and it has already changed my life for the better. I only seek the words of one wiser than me to clarify what I may be misunderstanding. Thank you !

What are your thoughts on the Goulsse Sacred Alphabet

I’m a naturally happy, optimistic person who genuinely enjoys life. I don’t really identify as a Stoic or a Nihilist.

Someone suggested that Epicureanism might suit me better.

But do I even need to identify with any philosophy? Can’t I just enjoy life and develop my own way of thinking?

I’m curious what you guys think.

So as a new stoic I try to focus on what I can control and not on what I can’t…

Easier said than done

I am a social animal, and being treated as a constant scapegoat/political target (I’m trans) is destroying my mental health to the point where it’s also bringing down my physical health

I think my reaction is human

However it is unproductive

I try to ignore on what I can’t control, but my human instincts (social animal) are difficult to suppress

How do I achieve the same “inner peace” as that one Roman guy that just chilled as the court was deciding if he’d be executed or exiled? (Forgot his name)
Like it’s easy to say “don’t care” and a lot harder to actually not care

I would like clarify that I understand my instincts make me human, I’d just like to stop being a slave to my instincts

Are there like exercises or techniques I can do to improve my Dichotomy of Control?
What do you personally do?

Thank you for your help