Im 24F, an architecture graduate, and I’m starting to question if I’m actually the problem in my family

I’m an architecture graduate, but I currently work from home as a VA, which is completely unrelated to my degree. My younger sister is 17F. Since my father passed away in 2023, it’s just been me, my mom, and my younger sister living together.
Lately, I’ve been feeling like my mom is constantly irritated or angry with me, and honestly, it’s starting to affect me a lot. We’ve already talked before about the things that hurt each other and the issues we have with one another, but despite those conversations, I don’t really feel like anything has changed in the way she treats me.

One of the biggest things that started bothering me happened nung 2026 after I finished all my architecture subjects and defended my thesis. I remember telling my mom, “Ma, wala na akong subjects. Waiting na lang ako for graduation.”

I expected her to be happy for me, but her response was basically, “Buti naman para makatulong ka na magbayad ng bills.”
I don’t know why, but that really hurt me. I felt like instead of being happy that I had finally finished five years of architecture school, the first thing she thought about was how I could start contributing financially. And architecture wasn't easy so akala ko pwede muna akong magpahinga saglit. But in the end, after a a month na naubos ko yung subjects ko, hired na ko sa work.

Mataas yung rank ng father ko sa PNP, so when he passed away, we received a significant amount of money. My mom and my sister also receive pensions, while I no longer receive one because I’m already legally an adult. Wala akong reklamo kung magbigay ako kase gusto ko ring makatulong kay mama, pero sumama yung loob ko kase hindi naman kami financially unstable pero the pressure was really on me kakamadali nya sakin na magka-work na ko.

Nung 2024, we used some of my dad’s money to build our house, which was actually something my dad and all of us had planned before he passed away. I understand that the money had to be used responsibly, and I’m not saying my mom should have given me everything I wanted. But there were little things that hurt me.
When I was in college, my aunt was the one who gave me my allowance for school, while my dad paid for my tuition.

At one point, I asked my mom if she could buy me a cabinet for my room. Instead, she told me that I could have it on loan and pay her back using the allowance my aunt gave me. Meanwhile, my younger sister was bought a cabinet. I know this might sound like a small thing, and maybe I’m being sensitive about it, but it stayed with me because it felt like, “Why was it okay to buy something for her, but when I asked for something, I had to pay for it myself?”

After I finished my subjects, I also started going out more often with my friends and boyfriend. My boyfriend is actually part of the same circle of friends. I understand that my mom might have been worried because I was suddenly going out more often. But growing up, my parents were very strict with me. I rarely went out, especially at night, even though I had a car. So when I finally finished my subjects and thesis, I felt like I could finally enjoy some of the freedom I didn't have before.

But whenever I asked permission to go out, my mom would get upset or make me feel guilty about it. There was even one time when I was out with our friends and she told me to come home.

This is also where my issues with my younger sister come in.
Growing up, I always felt like there was a lot of favoritism and tolerance toward her. Whenever there was an issue between us, I was always told things like, “Mas matanda ka, kaya ikaw dapat ang nagbibigay” “ikaw ang ate, kaya ikaw dapat ang umiintindi”

When she was younger, I accepted it. I thought that was just what older siblings were supposed to do. But now she’s 17. She’s old enough to understand when she’s being disrespectful, and I don’t think I should always be the one expected to give way just because I’m the older sister.

The problem is that I feel like because I was always made to give way when we were younger, she grew up not really respecting me. She rarely listens to me, doesn’t really follow what I say, and sometimes talks to me disrespectfully. And whenever I try to set boundaries now, it becomes another issue.

What confuses me even more is that I do contribute to our household. I help with the bills. I do chores. I cook. When my mom goes out to zumba, my boyfriend and I are usually the ones doing things around the house.

Recently, my mom talked to both of us kase pinaalam namin na dito na muna magsstay yung boyfriend ko and apparently she thinks that we don’t have plans for our lives. Na nagpapakasaya lang kami. Which really confused me. We are both working. Yes, neither of our current jobs are related to our degrees, but we are working and trying to save money. Our goal is to build our savings so that eventually we can start something of our own and become more independent. So hearing that we “don’t have plans” felt unfair.

She also told us that we should help more with the house, but again, I feel like we already do. We cook. We clean. We contribute financially. I’m not saying we do everything perfectly, but I don't think it’s fair to say we don't help at all.

Another thing that really hurt me was when I received my first salary. I was genuinely excited. I remember telling my mom, “Ma, sumahod na ako!” I was expecting even just a little excitement or happiness from her because it was my first salary. But she barely reacted. I know she didn't owe me a celebration or anything, but I don't know… I just wanted to feel like she was proud of me. Instead, it felt like my salary was simply something I was expected to give because I owed it to the family.

Sometimes I feel like no matter what I do, it’s never enough.
I try to make an effort with my mom and my sister. I try to help around the house, contribute financially, spend time with them, and make things easier for them. But somehow, I still end up being portrayed as someone who doesn't care about them.
They often talk about me, and one of the things they seem to believe is that I don't care about them and that the only person I care about is my boyfriend. And that honestly hurts because I don't feel like that's true.

I also remember when I first introduced my boyfriend to them because he wanted to court me. My mom actually told me:
“Hindi ako pinayagan magbf dati, kaya dapat maranasan mo rin yon.” That stuck with me. I don't know if I'm being unfair, if I'm too sensitive, masyado lang talagang mataas yung expectations nya sakin. I understand that she lost her husband and that she has her own struggles. I also understand that being a mother isn't easy. I'm not trying to say she's a terrible mother or that I'm a perfect daughter.

I just genuinely want an outside perspective.
Am I actually being selfish and ungrateful? Ako ba yung mag pagkukulang o mataas lang talaga expectations nya sakin, na kahit anong gawin ko wala naman sa kanya. Or is it reasonable for me to feel hurt by the way I'm being treated, especially now that I'm already 24, working, contributing to the household, and trying to build my own life?

NO POSTING PO IN ANY OTHER SOCMED PLS

it’s been a month simula nung naglayas NA NAMAN yung nanay ko and di na kami nag usap since then kase sobrang galit ko na din sakanya

..

(SYA YUNG KAKAMPI KO NUNG COLLEGE AND NUMBER ONE SUPPORT KO NOON. SOBRANG NAMIMISS KO YUNG DATI. I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

pero last year after grad, binagsakan nya ko ng malaking bayarin na utang, saying na “DAHIL YAN SA PAGPAPAARAL KO SAYO”. no choice ako kundi magwork muna para makabayad before magend yung year imbis na gamitin pang review center for boards. sobrang nastress ako.

my tita supported me from elem to jhs, nung shs nasa public ako, then 1st to 2nd yr, working student ako and cargo ko tuition ko. pinaaral ako ni nanay nung 3rd to 4th year. tatay ko walang ambag

nagresign sya agad sa work nya after grad ko kase pagod na daw sya. she’s 47. tatay ko 45 and may kapatid pa kong grade 9 na ako na daw bahala. never na ko nanghingi sakanya after nyan.

sobrang naapektuhan yung mental health naming magkapatid after grad ko kase nagbago lahat

muntik ko nang di matake yung boards last last month dahil nadiagnose ako ng MDD dahil lagi nya kami nilalayasan as in literal na no contact for months.

paulit ulit yung cycle ng pagmamakaawa, pagmomove on, iwewelcome sya ulit, then maglalayas na naman )

..

last layas nya is nung MARCH dahil babalikan nya lalake nya kase di ko daw pala sya kayang buhayin sa sahod ko then NO CONTACT ULET.

habang nagwowork graveyard full-time, nagrereview center ako habang nagpapatherapy and sinabihan ako ng psych na wag ko muna kitain si nanay para kayanin magboards this year

then biglaan umuwi sya ulit ng JULY na parang walang nangyare, pero i accepted her apology.

(ako lahat may cargo ng mga gastusin sa bahay bukod sa tubig kase kahit si tatay iaasa din sakin kesho malaki daw sahod ko. (wala din yan syang support sa pagaaral ko EVER SINCE). naginsist din si nanay na ipagawa yung isang part ng bahay namin at nasimot ako don. tas pag wala ako maiabot sasabihan pa ko na bat kase di ako marunong mag ipon haha.)

i still took my boards last last month and passed, then si nanay ko pa kasama ko sa oath taking kase kala ko magiging okay na lahat.

days after that, inopen nya na gusto nya ulit mabuo fam namin and sabe ko AYAW KO NA. nagccheat na sya elem palang ako. ilang beses na sya pinatawad at inintindi ng tatay ko. di ko alam gusto nyang mangyare eh in a relationship pa sya dun sa kabit nya nang almost 4 years. TWO TIME HARAPHARAPAN. iniisip nya daw sa future pagtanda nila ni tatay and shit. pero diniin ko na over na and tanggap ko na yung future na wala na. wala din naman syang balak hihiwalayan yung isa. di pa sapat sakanya na okay na samin yung setup na broken fam.

little did i know na sobrang dinamdam nya and kinabukasan nagempake na naman sya ng gamit nya and sa sobrang traumatic na saming magkapatid yung mga paglalayas nya nagdecide kaming umalis ng bahay.

pero bago pa man kami makaalis, kinuha nya saken yung pinundar kong mga gamit like ipad saying na “LAHAT NG SAYO, AKEN””HANGGANG MAMATAI, SISINGILIN KITA”

after nyan, sinabuntan at napuno pa ko ng pasa at pumutok pa labi ko dahil sa kakasunt*k nya sakin. TRAYDOR daw ako dahil ako yung anak ako pa yung ayaw mabuo pamilya namin. first time nya kong saktan physically.

dinefend ako ng kapatid ko tapos ending? kumuha sya ng kutsi is lyo tapos tinutok nya samin para di kami umalis. pinopoint nya na di na daw namin sya nirerespeto kaya mawala nalang kami sabay sabay. kinausap ko lang sya ng kinausap hanggang binato nya nalabg yung kutsi is lyo somewhere and tumakas na kami ng kapatid ko papuntang labas kase nanginginig na sya sa takot. YUN YUNG KINAKAGALIT KO NA BAKET KAILANGAN NYANG GAWIN YON SAKIN LALO NA SA KAPATID KO.

after that i called my titas abt the situation and eventually umalis na din yung nanay ko kasama mga gamit nya that day.

until now, wala pa din kami contact ulit pero my titas already updated me kung saan na sya naroon.

hindi ko na kaya yung ginagawa nya samin. darating din pala talaga sa point na mauubos at mauubos ka. nakakamanhid.

what if bumalik sya ulit ngayon? magsosorry ba sya? kung oo, matatanggap pa ba? oo, kase nanay pa din namin sya? lagi nalang di sinasadya kase galit? lagi nalang iintindihin kase magulang yan? nakakapagod.

i don’t know what to feel hanggang ngayon, pero one thing’s for sure DI KO NA SYA NAMIMISS.

Pagod na ako mag-isip paano akk makakasurvive araw-araw dito sa metro while thinking of ways to help the family sa province kasi di sapat yung sahod ng kapatid ko. Nag-aaral din pa ako at paraket-raket lang. Nakakapagod gusto ko na sumuko...

My friend from mnl asked me to loan money from my account since his acount isnt eligible yet. Since hes my friend, I loaned the money for him. And then months later, he ghosted me and I am getting 10-20 spam calls everyday. I js got accepted from my job 2 months ago and the salary i am getting isnt enough. Now im paying for the loan i lent him alongside with the bills at the house, my paylaters, the allowance of my sister. Is there smth i can do, like typewriting, data entry or smth for u guys? i have spare time from my current work and i thought of using that instead of js slacking around the office. Need ideas to earn more please, i badly need it. I am js living paycheck to paycheck rn. Im on my last 300 php rn and theres still 4 days before the salary.

Girlfriend ko at kapatid nya takot lumapit sa parents kasi sobra sobra ginagawa they don't want their kids to be successful gusto nila umasa lang sa pera nila pinapamukha pa sa kanila na di sila mabubuhay without their parents money ayaw nila mag trabaho para lang umasa sa kanila lol a lot of manipulation and gaslighting nangyayari sa mga bata tas kapag lumapit sa ibang tao anak nila sasabihin "bakit di kami nilapitan mo?" Lol what do you think? You have 2 daughters na suicidal sasabihan mo na "kulang ka kasi sa dasal" "kaka cellphone mo yan" "influence yan ng mga kaibigan mo" WTF KA BA kasalanan nyo yang mag asawa for giving them trauma!

​

Nabaon sa utang dahil sa pagpapagamot ng magulang. Tapos ang ending, sabay nila akong iniwan. Ngayon naghahanap ng second job para mabayaran lahat, pero ang ilap ilap. Puta, pagod na pagod ako. Gusto ko lang naman mabuhay nang maayos, makakain maayos, yung makabayad ng bills, at makapagtabi maski 500 nga lang sa isang buwan. Tang ina. Parang kailangan kong gumapang at dumaan sa butas ng karayom para sa pangarap kong di naman kataasan.

Since childhood ko, palagi akong binubugbog ng mom ko, ilang beses na rin akong muntik mapatay kasi hindi lang bugbog ang ginagawa sakin. May times na hinahampas ako ng bakal sa ulo and hindi ko na maalala nangyari afterwards, may times na sinasakal ako until mag pass out ako

Sa tuwing sinusubukan kong alalahanin childhood ko, puro pambubugbog lang ang naaalala ko

I grew up sa tahanan na puro sigawan, puro sakitan and i was drained every single day

Nag start ako mag work, ako na ang nagbabayad lahat, bills, foods, needs at kahit wants ng family ko. Nagsisigawan parin sa bahay, pero less sakitan na kasi alam nila na i can stand for myself already.

Tiniis at tinitiis ko parin lahat ng stress until last month, nag away kami ni mommy, it got to the point the sasaksakin niya ako ng kutsilyo. I taunted her to do it para matapos na lahat ng paghihirap ko but she didn't do it.

After that, nag empake agad ako. Tinry niya ako kausapin at igaslight into staying pero pagod na pagod at ubos na ubos na talaga ako

It's been almost a month yata or 1 month na since i left, sobrang peaceful na ng buhay ko and ayoko nang magkaroon ng tahanan na may sigawan, na may sakitan.

Gusto ko kapag nagkapamilya ako, mapaparamdam ko sa pamilya ko yung peace na binubuo ko ngayon, gusto ko matapos na yung pananakit

I promised myself na never kong ipaparanas sa magiging anak ko kung ano man naranasan ko mula pagkabata

At last, I finally have the guts to move out.

Sobrang hirap na sa bahay, kung sino pa ang kadugo sila pa ang hihila sa'yo pababa.

For context, I'm the 2nd child of 5. I stood up as Panganay kasi walang silbi yung panganay, bukod sa hindi naman sa amin lumaki at tumira, e panay kasalbahian lang dulot sa pamilya namin, minumura nanay ko, pinapaalaga ang anak while nag iinom s'ya, ganyan sya kapag bibisita.

Bata pa lang ako, namulat na ako sa hirap ng buhay namin, natutunan ko mag-side hustle High School pa lang, nagbayad ako ng utang sa tindahan.

Ako nag aasikaso sa mga kapatid ko while my mother is working, weekly nauwi minsin hindi pa. Ako nagbabudget sa kakaunting pinapadala, nagising ng maaga, naghahatid sa school, nagsusundo, nagluluto ng makakain if meron.

Nung ipinanganak sa bahay yung 4th child, elementary pa lang ako nun, pero nag ipon ako ng pera kasi alam kong walang pera nanay ko, pati kinakasama ng nanay ko walang silbi, walang presensya, nangbuntis lang haha

Ako nag alaga, nagising ng gabi kahit may pasok kinabukasan, timpla ng gatas, palit diaper.

And many more

I sacrificed so much in a young age.

Pero I regret it all na.

Now that we're in a better life quality, big house, a car, stable family income, nagbago na

Lalabas sila kakain, miski tanungin man lang ako kung anung gusto ko, none. Uuwi miski pasalubong wala, lalo na tanungin ako kung kumain na ba ako, never.

Nagpagawa ng malaking bahay, pero kwarto para sa akin wala.

Sa salas ako natutulog, I'm working 7 am to 10 pm due to constant Overtime, so magpapahinga na lang talaga pero ipapagkait pa. Uuwi ako may nag-iinuman, may nagbibidyoke, may mga bisita, nagluluto ng midnight snack maingay. Sobrang hirap magpahinga, kapag nagsabi naman ako, ako pa ang mali, syempre gaslighting + toxic mindset.

Uuwi ako, tirang kanin at ulam wala. Saktuhan para sa kanila lang or ipapakain kaagad sa mga alagang pets.

Walang kumustahan for me, walang masayang atmosphere, I feel like I do not belong here anymore.

Lahat sila, mula nanay, hanggang bunso, parang hindi na ako belong sa pamilya. Despite all of my early sacrifices.

Kahit mali sila kapag may kaaway, ako nagtatanggol sa kanila, in the end, sila rin pala sisira sa akin.

Now I finally have the guts to move out.

Sobrang short ako, as in pero I'm sorting things out. May mauutangan naman siguro ako 🥲

Ayun, hello Adulting talaga for me.

Sa una lang mahirap.

Baka po may maiioffer kayong part time / college grad 4 years working marketing graduate

Tbh nakakatamad na dito sa ph sobrang mahal ng bilhin tipong kulang pa ang sahod para sa sa pang araw araw, yung bills ko today dina kaya icover ng sahod :(( 17,800 sahod ko isang buwan 16800/2=8,400 kaltas pa ng pagibig hahzz

Rent - 3,500
Gasul - 1,625
Grocery - 1,200
Hc (cp ni mama) - 1,450
Gas - 500
Bigas 500
Utang nila mama - 1,500

3500+1625+1200+1450+500+500+1500=10,275

Wala pa akong pambaon nito for 15 days, load at pang meryenda hahahaha naiiyak nako sobra

AITA? My mom works abroad, she covers my siblings' tuition fees, baon and electric bills. My dad should cover the house rent (pero laging palya) may sarili siyang business but he's been living like a bachelor for 8 years now. Magbibigay lang kung kailan gusto. All the rest are on me, food, groceries, water, internet, pet needs, etc.

More than half of my pay goes to the house expenses. I have an on going car loan. I also got scammed by a friend na nasa 500k+, so I'm paying the CC debts.

I never had this much debt in my entire life. So it's just me and my mom in short who's paying for everything. I'm fed up honestly. Ako na tumayong parents sa mga kapatid ko every since they were 6 yrs old. College na sila now. Yung sibling after me, nakabukod na. May sariling business gamit ang pera ng mama ko. He never helped with bills, kahit 5 pesos wala.

I'm so fed up kasi paycheck to paycheck ako. When I asked my mom na hihiram ako sakanya para may makain kami, she turned me down. Wala daw siyang pera and marami na siyang expenses. But I'm aware na lahat ng savings niya nasa kapatid ko. Hindi ko na dinibdib. Until I saw her chat sa gc na she's willing to cover yung panganganak ng gf ng kapatid ko.

That was it. Sumabog lahat ng emotions. I felt betrayed. I asked her kung pwede patulong sa kapatid ko kahit yung water and internet lang, pero wala. She's willing to pay for it instead. Kasi yung kapatid ko may sarili na daw buhay. I've been working for 10 years. I only asked for help twice, and was turned down twice.

Naawa ako sa sarili ko. Kapag ako nagigipit, walang tutulong. Meanwhile, kailangan ko kumayod para sa lahat. Bibili ng sasakyan? "Ay maliit yan, dapat SUV". Ng bahay? "Ay 2 BR, di tayo kasya diyan". I just want to live for myself. Mangarap ng para sa akin lang. 30 years later, I know walang tutulong sakin. Gaya nung pinaadmit ko sarili ko sa ospital dahil wala silang pake.

Now galit sila just because I finally burst my bubble. I'm contemplating to move out but I know my other younger siblings will suffer. Nakakapagod maging stress absorber. Ultimo pag pila sa bayaran ng ilaw. Nakakapagod na sa lahat ng birthdays nila ako sumasagot. Pti pasko new year. Lahat may ampao, ako lang wala. Ubos na ubos nako.

I just want to vent kasi honestly, ang dami ko nang kinikimkim, and I don’t know if I’m wrong for feeling this way. I’m 22F, and growing up, hindi talaga ako naging close sa parents ko. Noong elementary ako, iniwan nila ako sa grandparents ko. Then noong high school, kinuha nila ulit ako, pero things didn’t really work out, and I ended up running away and living on my own.

I used my own money to pay for my apartment. Nagtu-tutor ako before, and luckily, nakahanap ako ng studio apartment na ₱2,000 lang per month. Scholar din ako that time, so kahit papaano, nakakaraos ako. Noong pandemic, senior high school ako, kinuha naman ako ng tita ko. Then noong nag-college ako, nag-dorm ako sa Manila.
Basically, I’ve been figuring things out on my own for most of my life. I’m only 22, pero pakiramdam ko ang tagal ko nang nag-survive mag-isa. And I think that’s where my resentment toward my parents comes from.

Minsan naiisip ko talaga, bakit kayo nag-anak kung hindi niyo kayang panindigan yung responsibilities na kasama no’n? I know life isn’t easy, and I understand na hindi naman laging financially stable ang isang pamilya. I’m not expecting my parents to give me a perfect life. Pero ang sakit lang isipin na I had to grow up so early and figure things out on my own when I was supposed to be a child who could depend on her parents. I had to stop studying and prioritize surviving. I had to find ways to support myself, and now that I’m finally earning money, parang hindi pa rin ako makahinga.

I currently earn almost ₱40k a month, and I know that’s already a decent salary. I’m grateful that I have a job, especially after everything I’ve been through. I also have a girlfriend, 25F, and IT siya. We’ve been together for three years, and I was with her even before she started achieving the things she has now, including having her own house and car.

I’m genuinely happy for her, and I’m grateful for our relationship because somehow, naging okay-okay na rin yung buhay ko since we started living together.
But despite earning almost ₱40k monthly, bakit pakiramdam ko kulang na kulang pa rin?

I’m the one paying for my siblings’ tuition and allowances. I want to help them because I know what it’s like to struggle, and I don’t want them to experience what I experienced growing up. Ayokong maramdaman nila na wala silang ibang maaasahan.
But sometimes, I can’t help asking myself, bakit ako yung sumasalo?

I’m their sister, not their parent. I love them, and I don’t regret wanting to help them, pero I also have my own life to build. I want to save money, enjoy my salary, and prepare for my future, too.

My girlfriend and I split our grocery expenses, pero ako yung sumasagot sa electricity and water bills namin. Then, kapag nagsho-short ako financially, may times na kailangan kong manghiram sa girlfriend ko ng ₱100 or ₱200. Nahihiya ako, honestly. She’s not the problem, and she’s never the person I want to blame. I’m just frustrated with myself and my situation because kahit nagtatrabaho ako and kumikita naman, I still find myself short because ang dami kong responsibilities.

And I keep thinking na if I didn’t have to shoulder my siblings’ expenses, maybe I could finally save more for myself.

Hi. I just need to get this out kasi wala talaga akong mapagsabihan or makausap about what I've been going through lately.

I've been missing work a lot because I keep getting sick. I take OTs, whether preshift or postshift, just to make ends meet, and I literally ended up getting hospitalized because my body couldn't take it anymore.

I'm currently rendering my resignation because I genuinely can't do this anymore. Susugal na lang ako and try to find a WFH job because I know I can't keep sacrificing my health just to survive. Pagod na pagod na ako, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I've been feeling depressed lately because of everything that's been happening at work, including how some of my colleagues have been treating me. I've spent so much time forcing myself to keep going kahit hirap na hirap na ako, thinking I just had to push through and get it over with.

And just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I found out na yung perang binibigay ko sa bahay para sa bills, hindi pala binabayad. I honestly don't even know how to process that. I've been working myself to the point of getting sick and ending up in the hospital, trying my best to provide for everyone, only to find out that the money I've been giving isn't even being used for what it's supposed to be used for.

I have cats, dogs, and a kid to provide for. I'm trying so hard to keep everything together, but I'm literally down to my last ₱500 right now. I don't even know how I'm going to get through the next few days, let alone figure out what comes next.

I'm so fucking tired. Tired of working myself to the ground. Tired of constantly worrying about money. Tired of being expected to keep everything together when I feel like I'm barely holding myself together. Tired of having to be strong because I don't feel like I have the luxury of falling apart.

I just want a break. I want to be able to rest without feeling guilty, to get my health back without worrying about how I'll pay for everything, and to live without feeling like I'm constantly one problem away from completely breaking down.

I don't even know what I'm hoping to get out of posting this. Maybe I just need to let it all out. Maybe I need someone to hear me out without judging me or telling me what I should've done differently. I'm so used to keeping everything to myself that I don't even know how to ask for help anymore.

I just wish, for once, that things would get a little easier.

does it get better? it’s been 6mos since my brother passed. May nagbago sakin parang nawala na yung dating ako nung anjan pa siya. Lagi ko siyang iniisip. Pag may masayang nangyayari sa buhay ko, i wish he was here. Pag mag isa lang ako sa kwarto ko may mga times na naiiyak ako at iniisip ko lang siya. pano ba ang sakit sakit e.

Naguguilty ako mag patuloy. Parang ang manhid ko na it feels like im just surviving and not living it’s like i need to survive this game of life. It was a sudden death, an accident. He passed at 25yrs old. If life could end that early what’s the point of striving hard , of living? okay ba siya? asan na sya? anong nafefeel nya? masaya ba sya kung nasan sya?

I have to remember him longer than i’ve known him. Ang dami pa naming pwedeng pagdaanan bilang magkapatid. Makikilala ko pa siya, makikita ko pa kung pano nya ihandle ang ibat ibang sitwasyon sa buhay: mahirap man, madali, masaya o malungkot. Kung may rewind lang e. Kung kailangan tlga may kunin, ako nalang palit nlng kami. Miss na miss na kita. Sana andito ka.

Hi, hindi ko alam kung ano pa bang gagawin ko sobrang bigat lang ng pakiramdam ko at sama ng loob, currently isa akong student, irregular student to be exact, ginawa ko tong account na to kasi hindi ko na alam kung kanino ako hihingi ng tulong or kanino ako iiyak ewan ko sobrang pagod ko lang and ang draining lang sobra panganay kasi ako tapos ako rin nagpapaaral sa sarili ko habang nag wowork, nakikitira ako sa auntie ko kasi malayo yung bahay namin sa university na pinapasukan ko kaya no choice ako kung hindi makisama talaga mababait naman sila pero sobrang pagod na ako kasi lahat ng gawaing bahay sa akin na iaasa minsan kailangan ko ng pahinga pero hindi kasi may work at school ako, Sa trabaho pinagkakaisahan pa ako ng mga ka work ko even my boss sobrang pagod na ako, sa school naman naipapasa naman lahat pero sobrang hirap mag aral pag kulang resources mo, idagdag mo pa na walang maitulong ang parents ko sa akin, gusto kong makatapos kaya gumawa ako ng paraan para makapag-aral pero parang unti unti na akong nawawalan ng pag-asa sobrang bigat sa pakiramdam na ganito hindi ko alam kung itutuloy ko pa ba pag-aaral ko o magtatrabaho na lang ako para makatulong ako.

2026 ang sakit mo😭

March 2026, nagkasakit ang father ko at halos naubos ang savings, up until now nag memaitenance sila ng gamot ng nanay ko.

July 2026, nakabunyis ang 8yrs live-in partner ko.Everyday iyak at hindi ako nakakapasok ng maayos sa trabaho.

October 2026, nagsara bigla ang company .Walang ipon, puro rejected.

Biglang isang breadwinner na nagstart magtrabaho noong 18yra old pa lang, feeling ko useless ako kapag hindi nakapagprovide.

May you marry a strong and gentle man.

pangatlong taon ko nang delayed, and honestly, hindi ko na alam kung kaya ko pa bang tapusin 'to.

halos lahat naman ginagawa ko para makausad. i'm doing my best, pero parang kahit anong kayod ko, hindi talaga ako pinalad sa buhay. ako na nga nagpapaaral sa sarili ko, ako pa sumusuporta sa kapatid ko. ang hirap pagsabayin ng pag-aaral at mga responsibilidad sa buhay, lalo na kapag ikaw lang din ang aasahan mo.

ngayon, ubos na ubos na ako. financially, mentally, emotionally, wala na talaga akong maibigay. gusto ko namang makatapos, pero minsan napapaisip na lang ako kung para sa akin pa ba talaga 'to.

hindi ko na alam kung anong gagawin ko. pagod na akong lumaban araw-araw tapos parang wala pa rin akong nararating. gusto ko lang naman makatapos at kahit papaano, gumaan naman ang buhay ko.

sa mga naging delayed rin nang ilang taon, paano kayo nagpatuloy? paano niyo kinaya kapag pakiramdam niyo ubos na ubos na kayo?

Context:

Helloo, I need your opinion hehehe. I’m 20yrs old and 3rd yr college student (Nursing). For almost 1 yr kasi napansin ko sobrang init ng ulo ng lola ko sa'min, although mabait naman siya kaso nakakairita rin minsan like gusto mo mag pahinga ng Isang araw may sinasabi na "Ang tamad tamad niyo puro kayo Higa" like laging ganyan naririnig ko, ako lang kasi lagi kumikilos sa bahay namin, ako nag luluto, nag lalaba, basta lahat-lahat. Kaya minsan yung physically and mentally exhausted na rin ako kaya may minsan na tinatamad ako mag linis, kasi ang hirap Pag sabayin yung Pag aaral tas Gawain sa bahay. As in ganon lagi routine ng lola ko, one time kagagaling ko lang sa duty ng 11 pm to 7 am, matutulog na Sana ako kaso dumating siya sa bahay namin tas sinabi na "ano puro tulog nalang, ang dami dumi ng bahay niyo" as in nakakahiya kasi naririnig ng kapit bahay namin. Hindi naman siya totally na marumi. Ewan ko ba if dala ba ng katandaan yan, like lahat ng bagay may nasasabi siya, kahit sa Pag bili ko ng mga grocery sasabihin Aksaya nanaman kami ng pera, tas kapag wala naman kami makain, magagalit din kasi kung ano ano raw pinag bibili namin kaya wala na kami pambili ng ulam. Tas ngayon naman bago ako mag pahinga kasi galing akong school tas nag ayos naman ako ng kusina namin, kaso nagalit ulit siya kasi bakit hindi ko raw masyado malinisan lahat. I mean okay paba ’to? Kapagod minsan at nakakahiya na rin, puro sigaw lagi naririnig ng mga kapit bahay namin puro nalang "TAMAD TAMAD" need your opinion guys

Nakita ko lang and it hits me.
Ganun siguro talaga no? Dati sabi ko pagnagkawork ako mabibili ko na yung gusto ko. Pero ngaung may work na ako mas naintindihan ko yung role ko bilang panganay at mas naintindihan ko yung halaga ng pera yung tipong imbis na yung gusto mo yung bilhin mo pero yung mas kailangan yung need unahin.

I just finished paying off the debts my husband left when he passed away last July, along with the money I borrowed to cover his funeral expenses. I wanted to settle everything, even if it meant sacrificing what little I had left.
Unfortunately, it left me with nothing.

My rent is due tomorrow, my water and electricity bills have piled up, and now my one-year-old son has a fever. I’ve barely just returned to work, and honestly, I don’t know how I’m going to get through this.

Sa totoo lang, hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko. I have a job, and I thought I could manage everything on my own. Pero hindi ko pala kakayanin kapag sabay-sabay ang gastusin, lalo na pagkatapos kong bayaran lahat ng utang na naiwan niya at ang perang hiniram ko para sa libing niya.

I’ve tried everything I can think of, but I guess there really comes a point when you realize you have no one else to turn to.

Lord, hindi ko na alam kung anong klaseng pagsubok ito. Sobra-sobra na po ang sakit na pinagdaanan ko. I lost my partner, the father of my child, and now I’m struggling to keep us afloat while trying to rebuild my life.

Please, Lord, huwag N’yo naman po akong hayaang tuluyang mawalan. I’m not asking for a luxurious life. I just want to pay our rent, settle our bills, buy what my son needs, and make sure he gets the care he deserves.

I’m just a single mom trying to make ends meet for my one-year-old son. Pagod na pagod na po ako, Lord, pero wala akong choice kundi lumaban dahil may anak akong umaasa sa akin.

I just hope that, somehow, things will get better. Because right now, I honestly don’t know how I’m going to survive the days ahead.

Is it just me, or is it really normal to feel this exhausted at 24, earning minimum wage and having to support other people?

My salary is only ₱24,000 a month. I help provide my mother’s allowance and pay for her maintenance medications every two weeks. I also help support one of my nieces, from groceries to school expenses and personal needs.

I thought growing up meant working hard, becoming independent, and giving back to my mother by providing what I could. I never imagined that it would also mean carrying responsibilities that were never really mine to begin with.

I have young nieces who are growing up without a father. Their mother, my own sister, is unemployed and seems content with how things are, while I keep trying to make ends meet for the people who depend on me.

And no, I am not blaming the kids. They never asked for any of this. They never chose to grow up in a broken family or to be in a situation where their needs depend on whether someone else has enough to give.

But what do I do with the guilt?

Because I know that if I stop helping, there might be no one else who will. I know what they might go without. I know what it feels like to need something and not have the means to get it. And knowing all of that makes it so hard to choose myself, even when I am already running on empty.
I am beyond grateful for my partner, who continues to extend whatever she can to help me. She has been one of my biggest sources of support, and I honestly don’t know how I would manage some days without her.

But sometimes, I think about the future, and it hurts.

Will this ever end? Will I ever get to a point where I can finally live for myself, save money, enjoy the things I work hard for, and build a life beyond surviving every payday?
I feel like I am stuck in an endless loop, working my first job and taking on freelance work just to keep up with everything. I want to grow. I want to move forward. I want to build something for myself. But how can I do that when every peso already has someone else’s name on it before it even reaches my hands?

Every payday, I am left with around ₱2,000 to stretch until the next cutoff. I don’t even live at home anymore because there is barely any space for me with all our extended family living there. For my own peace of mind, I stay in a dorm affiliated with my workplace, and the cost is automatically deducted from my salary.

Sometimes, I wonder when it will finally be my turn to breathe.

Ang hirap mabuhay kapag isang kayod, isang tuka. Ang hirap mangarap kapag halos lahat ng kinikita mo ay napupunta sa pangangailangan ng ibang tao. Ang hirap magplano para sa sarili mong kinabukasan kapag hindi mo alam kung may matitira pa ba sa susunod na cutoff.
And the hardest part is that I don’t even know how to stop caring.

I have never complained to the Lord about my situation. Whenever I pray, I start by giving thanks for everything I still have. Then I find myself praying for everyone else again, asking God to keep them safe and healthy, to spare them from sickness, because I know how difficult it is when someone gets sick and there is barely enough money to get by.

I keep praying for them, even on the days when I don’t know how to pray for myself.

I know that giving up is not the answer. I know life can still get better. But I also know that being strong for so long can be exhausting, too.

Maybe this is what nobody tells you about growing up: sometimes, you don’t just carry your own dreams. You end up carrying other people’s needs, too, until you start wondering if there is still room for the life you once imagined for yourself.

I love my family. I love my nieces. I am grateful for my partner. And I will always be thankful to God for carrying me through the days I thought I couldn’t get through.
But I am tired, too.

And I hope that one day, I won’t have to choose between helping the people I love and building a better life for myself.

I hope that one day, I can finally say that I am not just surviving anymore.

That I am finally living, too.

Ang hirap maging isang kayod, isang tuka. Pero sana, dumating din ang panahon na hindi na lang ako palaging kumakayod para mabuhay. Sana, dumating din ang araw na mabubuhay naman ako para sa sarili ko.