Arrival Time

[u/Pure_Explanation4606]

Curious what is a typical grace period for arrival? Our nanny is typically 5-12 or so minutes late each morning (my guess is related train times) We WFH but also go into the office so typically have to wait until she arrives to go get ready.

Sometimes when she arrives we are still getting baby ready for the day etc. (but I don’t think that excuses the timing)

We have GH, and we make sure to be home / come out to relieve her at least 10 mins before the end of the day. Occasionally as we are chatting she leaves +5 mins after her end time etc. but I’m always with baby at that point and feel like I make it clear that she should go.

Any advice? We have a shorter day on Fridays and am debating adjusting start time by ~10 or 15 mins each day to have additional time on Fridays..

[u/Better-Lemon-5532]

I'm a nanny and I arrive 5-10 min early. My NP are using the Huckleberry app. I check it before I walk out my door so I have a pretty good idea of what the baby's needs are at handoff. If baby is sleeping I know we can do a 5 minute update. If baby is awake I leave a little more time for a smooth handoff. But, I enter the house with the expectation the NP and I are both done with handoff and ready to start our day at the agreed upon time. I would be pretty mortified to be late at all, let alone daily. It shows a lack of respect.

[u/ofcbubble → u/Better-Lemon-5532]

Do you get paid for the extra 5-10 minutes?

[u/Better-Lemon-5532 → u/ofcbubble]

I dont count that time. But I'm very generously paid and have a great relationship with my NP, so I dont feel the need for everything to be transactional. Although, if I wanted to include that time my NP's would have no issues paying it.

[u/yellowposy2]

I’m a professional nanny and am five minutes early every day, no matter what. I’ve had maybe five snow or traffic emergencies in my last decade of nannying but lateness is extremely unprofessional. She should be catching an earlier train if her current one makes her late, or discussing a later start time if that’s not an option. Simply choosing to be late instead of finding a solution is disrespectful.

[u/Upstairs_Dog9233]

Our first nanny did this often, and also was taking the train. We are 100% WFH (even when traveling), so while we are flexible it became an awkward situation to discuss.

We created a back pushed grace period. You are welcome to show up anywhere from 7:45 to 8am. This made it more flexible for her to take an earlier train and not have to “sit around” waiting for 8am to arrive. This created much less strain on us when the trains were off schedule and didn’t leave her waiting durning gross or bad weather.

[u/AmeliaPoppins]

There is no grace period, especially when someone is waiting on you to start their own job.

[u/FeedResponsible5518]

I don’t think there is a grace period for nannying. I arrive 10-15 mins early daily and wait in my car until about 2-3 mins before my shift when I’ll go in. This isn’t necessary but I do so to ensure I’m never late.

[u/WorkingFI]

Honestly our nanny is 1 min early or right on time.  In a 1.5 years she’s texted twice she was running late but was still within 5 min of her start time.

We recently hired another nanny that has been on time or 2 min late which is not an issue for me. She’s still new so we may be in “honeymoon period” too soon to know

[u/justbrowsing3519]

There is no grace period. A start time is a start time.

Of course it’s normal to very occasionally (every few weeks or couple months) to be running a few minutes late and then communicating as much. Late every day is not acceptable.

[u/Root-magic]

Punctuality is a sign of respect. Both my NPs work from home, but there are times they have to jump on calls the minute I walk in. Out of respect for their time, I usually drive up 5 minutes early. I always end my day on time, why should they start their work day late. You need to set a firm boundary 

[u/inmyfeefees]

She should be arriving on time or early, like a majority of other jobs, or should adjust her work hours accordingly. Late is late.

[u/TheBandIsOnTheField]

Zero grace.

I would be talking to her, and absolutely reinforcing that she needs to be on time.

Our nanny walks in 4 minutes to her shift so she can get settled and take the kid right at 9. You need to be ready to work at shift time, if you’re not ready to work, you’re late. We start handoff right at nine. And we come down four to 10 minutes early so we can get information about our kids’ day

[u/Due_Apricot3306 → u/TheBandIsOnTheField]

Agreed. Zero grace.

[u/lindygrey]

Career nanny here. I usually arrive about 15 minutes early to my bosses house and sit in my car so I can walk in the door exactly at the time they are expecting me.

That gives me a little cushion for commute problems that might make me late or other issues. If I’m going to be later than my start time, which has happened maybe twice in the last decade, I call and let them know.

They are usually on time letting me go but they’re physicians and sometimes can’t leave the hospital and I’m contracted to stay in that case. I start getting double pay when that happens. It’s very rare.

[u/Susanschm1dty]

I’m a nanny, I’ve been with my family 4 months and haven’t been late once. I always show up 1-10 minutes early, and my boss is pregnant / doesn’t work, but it doesn’t matter, I think being consistently late shows a lack of respect. Start doxing however many minutes she is late from her pay, or reliving her that many minutes late and watch the attitude change. I also catch trains and have a 50 minute commute btw

[u/Brilliant_Target9046]

I would chat with her and reiterate that you guys need her walking in by the start time (let’s say 9am). Then make it clear that you guys are more than okay with her getting in early and having time to settle in/ relax etc before getting started. Some people feel like they are imposing by coming into your house too early. But if you go out of your way to make sure she leaves on time she should be going out of her way to be on time.

I will say I work for an outlier family that really struggles with time management and I am frequently kept 10-60 minutes past my end time AND I have to take calls related to the kids and house outside my scheduled hours. Because of this I have a set start time but my family also understands that I will flex my time to offset the extra hours stated above anywhere from 5-30 minutes BUT that was all discussed and it is tracked and never happens if the kids are home from school. There are cases where having flex starts work but it doesn’t sound like that’s your situation or that that works for you.

[u/patty202]

Talk to her. Tell her directly that if the start time is an issue, you can be flexible and move it back some,but that you expect her to be on time.

[u/Traditional_Prune672]

This is absolutely not okay. There is not a typical grace period for continuous lateness. Maybe a grace period for every once in a while. I’ve have only been late a few times and it’s only been because there was extra unexpected traffic and even then it’s only by 5 min. I always leave super early so I have time to scroll before I go in. I was super late one time (30 min) bc the highway was standstill for seven miles due to a bad accident. Make sure she is checking the traffic report every morning and just leaving earlier. It’s not that hard to leave five minutes earlier.

[u/easterss]

At every job I’ve ever had I’ve been expected to be ready to go by the start time. If I had a 9 am meeting, I had to show up to the office early enough to set my things down, refill my water, use the restroom, etc and get to the meeting room before the meeting starts.

That is no different for a nanny. She needs to plan her commute with enough time to be able to set her things down, wash her hands, and get to the baby by the time the clock actually starts.

Being late is rude.

[u/713elh]

What is GH?

[u/Pure_Explanation4606 → u/713elh]

Guaranteed hours. Set number of hours she is paid for whether we need her or not

[u/713elh]

Just a thought, but if you’re still getting the baby ready after her arrival that might be why she’s relaxing a bit with her timing. Pair that with working from home and it might read less structured/ more casual than you want it to. Let her know that things have been a bit relaxed and you’re going to need to get back on track with being at your desk by 9:00 AM.

[u/Pure_Explanation4606 → u/713elh]

Yes I think this is the case - we also started before I returned to work, and I was trying to be really easygoing in general so I think this contributed

[u/713elh → u/Pure_Explanation4606]

the good news is that should be pretty easy to clear up.

[u/yourfavmum]

I text if I’m gonna be more than 6 minutes late(happened once). Other than that, I have been late 1-3 minutes several times. My NP have also been late relieving me by 1-5 minutes several times and I figure it evens out in the wash.

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[u/Agreeable_Dark6408]

If you adjust start times, will she continue to be late? What’s her excuse?

[u/Pure_Explanation4606 → u/Agreeable_Dark6408]

I’m hoping not! We’re going to try out a later time and see. Seems to be based on the train schedule

[u/Visible_Catch555]

5-10 minutes a few times a year at most? Our nanny has always been on time. I would modify the time so you’re actually getting your GH fulfilled. Right now you’re paying for at least an hour of time she’s not working. Or you could total number of minutes she’s late Monday-Thursday and then add on the time to her Friday schedule. She needs to work all the minutes she’s paid to work. 

[u/Pure_Explanation4606 → u/Visible_Catch555]

Yes hoping to add the time to Friday. Will hopefully be a win win - as we’re thinking about it seems extended Friday will be really helpful

[u/Loud_Rip_1970]

As a nanny - I really hate even being right on time I feel like I’m late if I do that. I’m not saying all Nannie’s should feel that way but for me personally I leave for my commute early being that it can range and change quickly in my area and at minimum my drive is at least 30 minutes. So I am always usually at least 10 min early. I just park outside and wait a few I go in wash my hands and it gives them some time to check in go over anything etc. - or a quick chat with the parents. I like to also be mindful they probably don’t want me in there super early either lol because they have routines may want to spend time with baby etc. anyways I feel that every nanny should at least be right on time. It’s important to be reliable and professional. Here and there I could understand having a grace period leniency for situations that it works for but most I feel parents really need a reliable caregiver and people fall into bad habits so too much leniency and grace period makes some people feel like they can get away with it always and becomes a habit. I think it’s important to time it appropriately the trains and such to be a bit more consistent in my opinion. Totally your call but if it’s affecting you or bothering you I think you should absolutely bring it up. No other place of employment would tolerate someone that is consistently late!

[u/Melodic-Ad-7930]

We had a similar issue with my current NP. My start time was 8, but they also had calls right at 8, so mornings were rushed and we barely had time to go over anything for the day. We shifted my hours to 7:45–5:45 instead of 8–6, and it’s made mornings so much smoother. That extra 15 minutes gives us time for a handoff and a little buffer if I’m occasionally running a few minutes behind. They can still get on their calls on time, and I’m working the same number of hours.

[u/That_Background_6393]

I work 1.5 hours away (not for much longer) but in the past 2 years I’ve only been late with heavy traffic or lane closures, maybe 5 times. Otherwise I’m there on time (I sit in my car 5-15 mins beforehand). This way they know If im late on the rare occasions I am, it really is due to heavy traffic. Gotta be respectful of that start time. I’ve never felt like there is an appropriate grace time.

[u/AITAHdinendash]

I require them to be ready at the time of their shift. Once or twice being 5 min late? Ok. But routinely? Bye.

I have to leave at 6:30 am… delaying that means i show up to my work late. Do you think my boss is going to be ok with me being late 5-12 min everyday? No? Then it’s not ok with my nanny either.

[u/Appropriate-Bar6993]

Yikes, i think you need to enforce/clarify a hard start time, then she needs to take the earlier train and be killing time or arriving early.

[u/Constant-Pineapple37]

I’m a nanny I’m typically not late because I have a genuine fear of being late haha 😆 i’ve been late to pickup maybe 3 times in 2 years I would have a talk with her about it that’s all

[u/Nervous-Ad-547]

Not currently a nanny, but I try to arrive at any job about 20 minutes early. I will usually stay in my car until 5 til. I like a few minutes to decompress, especially if it was a long drive. But I do go to the door at least a few minutes early, so I can use the restroom and settle in.

[u/Feisty-Bluebird-5106]

As a nanny I am usually 5-10 minutes early. If I am going to be late, even by a few minutes, I always text. Which has happened maybe a handful of times in the last five years.

[u/Pure_Explanation4606]

Thank you, this has been super helpful!

[u/Numinous-Nebulae]

Up to 5m for us if it’s occasional. 5m late everyday would not be ok. 

[u/kegelation_nation]

I live in NYC and have personally been impacted by subway issues countless times. Because of that, our grace period is 10-15 min. Honestly, the trains on our line are so bad that she’s either 15 min early or 10 min late, there’s really no in between. If she’s late she just stays later at the end of the day. It isn’t always ideal, but I’m understanding because our subway line sucks.

[u/Pure_Explanation4606 → u/kegelation_nation]

Totally understand and happens to me as well - but I don’t have much value in her staying late because I’ve already stopped my workday / come home to meet our normal end time. And want to spend as much of my evening with my baby as possible :)

I’d feel differently if she was sometimes early by the same margin but that’s not the case

[u/kegelation_nation → u/Pure_Explanation4606]

Oh no, I totally understand. I don’t really need our nanny to stay late most of the time too (and if we do, 99% of the time I ask first). Occasionally, I’m in a meeting that has run late and my husband hasn’t made it home yet so she just stays without asking. Just on our end, after 4 years with our nanny this is where things settled. If she stays late she’s always doing chores while I’m with the kids. So that way I’m spending time with my kids and she’s washing dishes or tidying up the nursery.

EDIT: and when I say she’s early that has happened like a handful of times. Most of the time she’s 5-15 min late.

[u/lizardjustice]

There is no grace period to the day starting. A start time is a hard start time, not a suggestion.