(Just a disclaimer, my mum has autism and a few other disorders so she probably didn't intend anything bad by saying this. Also NSFW warning)

Yesterday I was making a bit of coffee in the evening and my mum came in to take her medication, said hi to her and all was normal. Finished making it and before I went to leave she said to me "Wow, smells like you masterbated! Fishy." Just... Wtf? First of all, generally a weird thing to say to anyone especially your kid especially considering I'm 18 so it's not exactly uncommon anyways?... Second, holy the dysphoria. Worst part is I did NOT do anything beforehand.

Now I'm hyperaware that I don't have a dick whereas before I'd kinda get on with my day. Just great, another thing to be constantly dysphoric about. Luckily I have a few packers already to calm it down but doesn't help honestly.

This is weird right? She definitely didn't have intent behind it, she just speaks her mind. She did similar things to my brothers too, whenever she walks in on them accidentally she'll announce it to the whole house. She needs to learn to control herself honestly.

I started college this year, particularly one near a major city if that helps. I’ve done my best to join clubs and meet people and have made friends, however I still have no idea where to meet girls. Nobody really speaks to one another in my classes, people usually go to school events with a group of friends so there aren’t many chances to meet new people, and none of the clubs I’m in where I have made friends have many girls in them. I’ve also tried Taimi, however nobody really replies to messages on there. Not sure what to do

I've had this ongoing issue since coming out where there's a range of men (both trans and cis) who act like I have to be misogynistic now that I'm openly living as a man. It can be exhausting. It also disgusts me that this is an expected thing for some people/something that they seem to view as a defining feature of masculinity.

I've come across some trans men with an "us vs them" type mentality who've vocalized judgement about trans men who don't hold negative feelings towards women as a whole. A lot of that quickly goes downhill into the "you're not a real man if-" you're being a decent person or kept some friendships with women apparently.

The cis men have mostly been family members of mine who seem to do it as a test. There's been so many times where someone will say something around me and then stare at me specifically, as if trying to check if I'll fall in line with dude-bro locker room talk or if I'll have the "woman" response.

It's been one of my biggest frustrations lately with being out. I have a lot of guy friends who are chill too, but there's this ongoing background messaging from others of "this is how men are and how they act with men" that both feeds into dysphoric frustration and just makes me angry that men are associated with being terrible from so many different categories of people. I don't care what the statistics might be around the behavior. I'm a man *and* I want to be a decent one.

Just been on my mind a lot lately. I'm very tired.

It sucks. It hurts a lot. I am an individual who struggles a lot. I have bpd. It sucks really bad to have my feelings dismissed just because I look like a guy now. Its all I wanted, I feel more comfortable in my skin now being on t for a year and a half. But I hate that other queer people would hate me or dismiss my feelings just because of how I look and sound.

I feel a lack of support from the queer community, but I don't fit in with cishet guys either. It feels so isolating

Long story short: getting a prescription from a dictor is a tedious process I don't have the time of going through (working 2jobs, no time to take days off and stand in lines to my GP to them stand. in lines to a dermatologist etc etc) so I'm looking for treatment suggestions that worked for others in my position.

I'm on mo 4 of my transition, my T levels are just a bit above the norm (switched to longer intervals between my shots, getting my bloodwork dobe in 3 weeks from now) and E is well suppressed. Acne is starting to get really bad. It was TERRIBLE during my natal puberty, I have acne scars all over my face, chest and back, and while more scars won't change much for me, I kinda wanna keep tgem to a minimum if possible. So basically the question is - what treatment worked for you, personally? Most curious about the experience of other men from Ukraine since some medications that can be accessible abroad might be hard to find here and vice versa, but any asvice is appreciated!

In quotes because it is a phrase, not me declaring a side. I'm uncertain myself.

I never hear trans guys perspectives on this.

I'm a bit over two years on testosterone and have had almost zero facial hair growth. I am barely able to grow the thinnest, patchiest, teenage boy stache and nothing else. My levels have been hovering the 800 ng/dL range since I started so I know it's not a dosage issue.

I've been on testosterone for 5 weeks, 30mg. I had a conversation this morning and I realized I'm starting to display the stereotypical T voice. I hate to be like this but I do not want that. I've been singing all my life and singing is everything to me. It is all I'm worth and all I'm good for. If my voice gets fucked up I will genuinely end my shit. How do I make sure that my voice drops properly and doesn't end up permanently ruined? I know it's to due with the thickness and length of the vocal cords and that if they thicken but don't grow properly that causes the sound. How do I make sure they grow properly?
I've heard to go low and slow to prevent your larynx from ossifying prematurely. Does anyone know anything else about that? Should I reduce my dosage? I'm 18 for context. Also on informed consent currently, won't have access to an endocrinologist for at least another year.

I already had high testosterone levels and was a contralto before this. I'm panicked and Idk what's going on. I know that adult testosterone levels are what causes your vocal cords to set and harden, I just found that out just now. Is it possible that I've already set them and i'm permanently fucked? If i reduce my dose and do it at low for a long time do I still have a chance for them to develop properly?

Anyone else pre t like to bathe in lava and now can't handle it anymore? I miss soaking my muscles in it lol just wondering if it's t related

Hello! I only started on T a month ago and the one thing that had been on my mind, my family has an old fashioned mindset. My main concerns are my grandparents and my brother. My brother has made comments in the past about trans people and he has Asperger's which makes it harder for him to understand things. My grandparents are in their late 80s and are very old fashioned.

I'll be very heartbroken especially when it comes to my brother since he is the only sibling I have if he cuts me off completely. How can I explain it to them to help them understand that I'll be the same person but will just look and sound different?

I’m Pre-T and a youngin’ (18) don’t know where else to ask since everytime I ask cis-dudes they say I just need to work out but it never helps with my dysphoria since I don’t know what I’m doing, I have some guides but I’m honestly clueless.

If any are you are gymrats or just lean, what do I have to change in my routines or diet to actually gain muscle that can help me look masculine while getting lean? I know it’s different for me since I still havent started T so my body will like take different amounts of nutrients or something to get the look I want.

I’m fat and have no muscle so it really gets my dysphoria going, I’m just trying to look for advice that isn’t “eat more protein” because I swear I just look more fem and just getting skinny will make me look like a twink which is not what I’m aiming for.

I try my best, cardio and I’m in a caloric deficit but I have no idea where to start with muscles to get the masculine look I want. And everytime I ask a cis dude he either calls me a chud or gives me some bs advice, and then theres the notorious “dont work out you’ll look like a man” comments from my family so I just need advice on what to do or where to start 😢 pls

I've never been to a bar nor really drank. Just wanna socialized since I left a program where I had friends i seen daily. Any tips or advice?

So I just got a referral for top surgery at OSU, and quite frankly im lost. I hav3 been referred to a specific surgeon just the office(?) And i have no idea what surgeon to pick or even what t o look for when researching them. Any advice for picking or research tips greatly appreciated.

I hate this condition and I hate my fucking life

Just had top surgery! Lowkey feels the same as before because of the post op binder. My dog won’t leave me alone.

Original post got removed so reupload to focus only on the story. Took out the parts where I said I don’t understand trans men getting pregnant and that no one should be having kids right now so the original story and truth stays up.

This might be the worst shit I’ve ever went through in my entire life. I still can’t believe it happened 😭.

He’s my ex now btw, I’m not stupid.

I’m a binary trans man. So is he. We were T4T, together for 4 fucking years, we lived together, and I genuinely thought this was someone I was going to spend the rest of my life with.

I’ve always been very clear that I don’t want children. I don’t want to be a dad, I don’t want to adopt, I don’t want anything to do with ts. And pregnancy specifically is a huge trigger for me. Like the idea of being pregnant myself makes me want to rip my uterus out. My ex knew that better than almost anybody. We’d had multiple conversations about it, including how uncomfortable I was with people constantly bringing up trans men’s reproductive anatomy like that’s the most amazing thing about us. But he always wanted kids. He tried multiple times to persuade me on my decision, saying he would carry it for us because he isn’t dysphoric about it, just ignoring the fact that I said multiple times I didn’t want any regardless of who carries it. At a certain point, I told him straight up we can break up if he’s so adamant on having kids. He finally agreed on having none and stfu about it. So I thought everything was fine and that we finally understood each other.

Then he started acting weird a while ago. Like always being busy after work, supposedly helping friends move, giving people rides, or staying out late. It was always some new fucking excuse. Then he started asking me a shit ton of questions about my schedule, even though he already knew it and that I usually hung out with my friends on weekends. Then he started getting weird about his phone, like it was always facedown or glued to his hand. And his location would randomly stop updating, so he’d blame his battery or the app. I always told my friends that I’m pretty easy to cheat on because I don’t go through phones, I don’t check your location 24/7, I don’t care about flirting with friends or anything like that. But it was hard to not notice the shit he was doing.

I asked him multiple times if something was wrong, and every time he acted like I was being the weird ass one. But I’m not fucking stupid so I asked if he was cheating. He got mad at me for asking so I dropped it. Looking back, I feel like a fucking idiot.

A few weeks later he tells me we need to talk. I thought maybe he wanted to break up. We’d been arguing more, barely spending time together, and I was honestly getting tired of feeling like an inconvenience in my own relationship. Instead, he told me he was pregnant.

I thought he was fucking with me so I laughed. Like maybe I was tripping or something. Apparently he’d already found out weeks ago and had been keeping it from me while trying to figure out what he wanted to do. He wanted to keep it.

He started crying, talking about being scared, and how he’d never planned this. Said he understood if I was angry but that he still loved me and didn’t want to lose what we had.

I’m still sitting there in shock that not only did he cheat on me, but he also got pregnant.

After that I crashed out. Asked who it was, how long it had been happening, whether he’d brought them to our apartment, blah blah blah. He barely answered any of my questions and I got angrier. And then he told me he wanted us to stay together. So… he wanted us to work it out while he was pregnant with another man’s baby?

I literally left our apartment before I did something bad. I’d rather not go to prison over something that fucking stupid.

Top 5 most embarrassing shit that’s ever happened to me, but I hope you guys enjoy my horror story 😭. Never dating T4T again

I’m 18, on T for ~1.5 years, and had top surgery this january. I pass, my life is going fine, I have plans for the future, but I feel so bad. Every day I feel so angry and frustrated. I feel like Ive been betrayed by my family, I feel like I’ve lost the person I was supposed to be, I feel like I’ve been raped nonstop for years until I started hrt. I don’t know how to move on with life. Theres not a time period I can try to go back to where I was happy and healthy, my entire life has just been dysphoria. It’s not enough to just transition, the trauma doesn’t go away when you start passing

TransPride YOUniting Health & Wellness Virtual Conference: Oct 15-17

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First opening keynote is on

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I am not affiliated with this conference, simply sharing the resource.

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• Opens Thu, Oct 15 at 7:30/8 am EST
• Ends Sat, Oct 17 at 5:30 pm EST

• Fully virtual; open to all but USA-based

• Free registration for trans individuals and the parents and caregivers of trans individuals

• Can use pseudonym to register and attend anonymously if you so choose

• All keynote and speaker sessions streamed live

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I know a lot gets thrown around in terms of phalloplasty, but I wanted to share my experience as someone who had it, am overall happy with it, and my complications. I had rff phallo in 2017 and started having problems day one, my skin graft site would not stop bleeding and I requires blood transfusions. I then lost half of my penis due to blood flow issues and infection. I had that half rebuilt with a SCIP flap that took several surgeries to get an aesthetic I liked and to have a nerve graft placed in it. I've had so many UL surgeries that I stoped counting at 20 procedures, what finally worked was three urethral dilations with kenalog injections. I've been stricture free for 5 years now. I tried the two piece inflatable pump but it started eroding and got infected and had to be urgently removed, and because. I have two blood supplies I can't try another device. Phallo is still one of the best decisions I've made, even without medical tattooing my penis usually doesn't put me. Am I disappointed I can't penetrate on my own? Yes, but there's so much more that I needed from surgery than just that so I still feel like I'm in a much better place. Post phallo I've noticed that I care more about my overall body and tend to focus on other things that I'm not willing to try to surgically correct, but body image issues aren't solely a trans issue and it's something I have to remind myself of.

I usually get T through Planned Parenthood and recently moved to Utah, it says they dont offer it here. Anybody from Utah know a solid source for T?

Ok im pre everything, im technically out to my parents but they literally just ignored it. Whatever.

These past few days I have been pretty hormonal because you know. So everytime I see a trans guy getting what I wish I had I just cry.

Oh you got top surgery? Im happy for you. Im crying my soul out.

You celebrating 5 years on testosterone? Congratulations! Im genuinely about to fly off my balcony.

You got on puberty blockers b4 female puberty started? Yess love that! I will relapse.

Bottom surgery results that look absolutely beautiful? Good for you man, watch me perform the surgery myself.

Supportive parents? Im so glad. I want to die.

I feel so bad for feeling like this, because were all trans you know. We all struggle.

And also like everytime I cry about not having something, I cry about crying because I feel so dysphoric everytime I show weak emotions.

I went to therapy for like a year, I came out to the therapist to talk about this specifically. She started asking me if it wasn't just a phase, and stuff like that, then she proceeded to call my mother and tell her EVERYTHING I told her.

Genuinely just kill me already so I get reincarnated into a cis guy or something like shit man.

How does one even stop feeling like this bro. I just feel like life is not worth living everytime I see somebody living the dream.

I bought my first packer with moveable skin—the Pico by Axolom. After a month, the skin tore. I’m not exactly sure what caused it to break. I should mention that my girlfriend sometimes sits on me and basically rubs against the bulge while I’m wearing pants. That’s the only way we can be intimate. Anything else triggers my dysphoria. I think the packer couldn’t handle that.
But it didn't break at that exact moment. What happened was, that one day I noticed there was a kind of dark spot under the skin.
I thought it was some kind of air bubble under the skin. So I gently pulled the skin in that exact spot with my fingers because I thought the "air bubble" would go away. I really didn’t pull very hard, but the skin tore right away. I ordered a new packer right away—the same one, but this time with movable testicles and skin. I get scared as soon as I put it on because I just don’t know exactly what I did wrong with the other one. I'm too scared of breaking it right away after just one week. I told my girlfriend it would be better to use a different packer for intimate moments. But I don't even dare to touch the packer anymore. But that’s exactly why you get a “special” packer like this one with movable skin and testicles—to touch it, play with it a little, and feel that euphoria thanks to how realistic it is. Has anyone had a similar experience with a packer like this from Axolom?

I'm from Germany, and I had the text translated; I hope people can still understand me well.

I know I sound like a doomer but honestly, who would want THAT?

I'm 22, almost on T, pre surgery. I'm gay and I am not interested in T4T relationship just because I know I'll be jealous that the other guy is more advanced than me in his transition and it'll be dysphoria olympics. I'm bipolar, anorexic and have CPTSD and due to my trauma I can't even imagine a day I'll be comfortable with someone seeing my body (including doctors, so that's fun especially since I want both top and bottom surgery). So there isn't even a world where I'm able to have casual hookups. My face or body doesn't make up for the rest either, my physique doesn't makes the investment worth it. And on top of that I live in the middle of nowhere, no huge queer community and the only gays around here are either Frankie Grande's clones (no shade) or 65 yo dudes.

I'm genuinely cooked

Kind of a long shot, but no stupid questions ig.

I wish I were someone that could make my peace with my arrangement the way that a lot of other trans folks seem to.

The further along in my transition I get, the worse my bottom dysphoria gets. Post top surgery and a year on HRT, and it’s my biggest source of dysphoria.

Sometimes I feel moderately okay with it. Even enough to consider simple meta and nothing else. I wonder whether there’s a way to make myself feel okay with it all the time?

As an asexual, it doesn’t really make sense for me to undergo the long and complicated process of phallo if I’m not going to use it, but I don’t think meta would alleviate my dysphoria enough to be worth it.

I want to be able to stand to pee unassisted, I want to not have to pack anymore, I want to be able to change in a locker room or use a urinal without drawing any unwanted attention to myself. I want to be able to feel good about my genitals.

My biggest personal issue with phallo is the graft site scar. I think my country only does arm or leg grafts. I think I’d be really distressed by the concave scar appearance and lack of body hair from electrolysis/lasser. I think I could only be okay with the scar appearance if the graft came from my upper back. I don’t think it would be a possibility for me logistically though.

I wish I didn’t need surgery at all. I hate that there isn’t a choice that better meets my needs.