I'm part of my church's prayer shawl ministry but I have a hard time keeping focus with both praying and crocheting at the same time. So I was wondering, is anyone else part of a prayer shawl ministry and if so how do you pray while stitching?

I recently learned that lust means a disordered view of sexuality. That, essentially it is a form of objectification of a person. I am coming from the protestant background where it was my understanding before that lust basically meant any sexual thought (it's not explained very well.)

Well, I don't really think I look for sexual pleasure in others and I certainly don't separate them from their personhood.. I'm very emotional, present, etc. What I have done though, is allow myself to be lusted after, and accepted sexual attention because I thought I needed to in order to be loved or valued.

Not to get too deep, but this kind of started early on in my life, because I was a victim of childhood sexual abuse. I think it was normalized to me. I grew up and allowed my sexuality to be useful in getting affection. To put it practically, if I wanted closeness, to feel desired or to cuddle, I'd be okay with having sexual acts happen, but ultimately my goal was never really the type of "sexual pleasure" that I think other people mean when they talk about sexual pleasure.

However some of it was definitely disordered, because in my worst moments, I didn't love the man at all, but just wanted to feel desired/thought it could maybe lead to love. In my most dark moments, I thought it would bring me a sense of control or power or "coolness" (this was in my teens). I don't mean control over the person, but control over my life/desirability/ability to attract and sustain attention.

Is this considered lust? I want to know how to really repent of all of this, knowing that as a result of all this, more than anything I really felt objectified. In this season, I also was sexually assaulted unfortunately, and the whole time is blurry and kind of hard to think about. I want to repent for what I am accountable for, but because there was so much pain it's hard to know where to start.

Thank God, I've been celibate for 5 years and am discerning catholicism right now.

Hi everyone,

Long story short, I lost my job yesterday. I won’t go too far into detail other than I was partially in the wrong in terms of my reaction to what this client did, but she was extremely disrespectful and out of line, so naturally, I’m angry that she successfully got me fired.

As a Catholic, I believe in forgiveness, I believe in turning the other cheek and “being the bigger person” so to speak, but I have reached a point in my life where I will no longer tolerate disrespect. I’ve been somewhat of a doormat for most of my life, and have grown tired of being treated like I’m stupid or less than because people see me as a sweet person.

I don’t know what to do. This wasn’t a long term career by any means, but I did care about the work and I was actually pretty darn good at it. I’ve been struggling to find work in my chosen field, so this is of course a further blow to the panic I feel about my future.

My question is, how have you ladies dealt with your anger in healthy and holy ways? I had a full blown meltdown yesterday that almost got me hospitalized, and this morning I awoke feeling more anger than sadness. I feel utterly disappointed not just in myself, but at my workplace and coworkers, who I believed to have created a bond with. All I want to do is scream and cry. I want to talk to God but I just feel angry and I don’t know what to make of what His plan could possibly be going forward. This past month has been terrible: I lost a family dog, my car basically set itself on fire, and now I’m unemployed. I’m fortunate enough to have family that will be able to financially support me as I search for my next job, but I feel an unbearable amount of guilt for taking up their time and resources. Simultaneously, I basically just want to spend all my time rotting in bed and sleeping away the pain.

Logically, I know I’m not special. People go through this all the time, and even more go through far worse. But I just really need support from people in the Catholic faith that know the internal battle of wanting to crash out but also knowing that that isn’t what He intended for us. If any of you have advice, it would be much appreciated. Bless you all.

genuine question. i personally think no better time to represent Momento Mori, but my husband is on the fence. Not because of conviction, but he is worried about what OTHER parishioners would think. I'd like to say we are pretty devout. Not looking for arguments, just a genuine curiosity for what this group thinks? My husband is really only worried because we go to a small town church where many attendees are older, more conservative, etc.

My husband and I decided not to do the NIPT test with our first baby. We figured the result didn't matter, we would obviously keep our baby regardless of the outcome. The decision felt tied to our faith, in that we're open to life no matter what.

At the 12-week NT scan, our son was flagged for Downs syndrome (a soft marker). We waited 4 weeks to do another scan which showed he was fine. He was born healthy and has been ever since. Those 4 weeks of not knowing were a bit stressful.

Now we're expecting baby #2. My midwife suggested doing NIPT instead of the NT scan to avoid any potential soft-marker issues. It made me think...maybe its not the worst idea? But the NIPT also has a risk of false positives for the trisomies

Perhaps we should just do none of those tests at all and wait until the 20-weel anatomy scan? Feeling a bit conflicted! What's your take on the NIPT test?

I had a 95-year-old woman tell me to find a quote to anchor me in life.

At the time, I told her Proverbs 3:3 was my one (it’s a goodie).

St. Ignatius’ quote has become my current one. For me, it allows me to focus on being the Christ-figure I actually want to be ..and constantly motion my soul towards Him instead of the vices I’m prone to.

What do you all live by? Would love to hear your perspectives.

TW: loss

Went for my first ultrasound yesterday and was told they couldn’t see anything on my uterus. I am 5 weeks 4 days. My first hcg on 10/2 was 53 my second on 10/5 was 180. My doctor didn’t ask for any other testing until yesterday which showed 49.

Not sure what to do or say or how to react. I’m devastated. I’m assuming I lost my baby and now will be preparing for miscarriage. This is my first pregnancy and I could just use some support and prayers. Has anyone gone through something similar and had luck in the future? How can I stay faithful when the one thing I’ve prayed so hard for was taken away? We have struggled for over a year with fertility . Where do I go from here? I just feel so lost and heartbroken.

We had our first baby earlier this year and I’m just now realizing my husband has paternal PPD… he said he lost his faith. Has anyone dealt with this? Did your husband overcome it? What helped??? Any wisdom or encouragement or prayers are more than welcome and appreciated. We want to stay married and still love each other but this is hard.

With the faith part, we used to pray together and every night, weekly adoration, monthly confession, church marriage events, read the Bible… he slowly withdrew from it all besides going to mass together and every week.

Begging God to bring my husband back in general as this PPD is making him not himself. Basically he has habits that aren’t like him and his mannerisms are not like him either and other symptoms (don’t want to get into the weeds).

Thank you and God bless you

I got these little holy water containers off amazon and was trying to see whether I should use the bow or not. I’m gonna be spreading them around my house on all four corners. And just seeing I think the bows cute but also not sure it’ll hold up long term kinda thing.

I’m a teenager, and wanted the Catholic perspective on this.

I know it isn’t directly a sin, but I hate getting NSFW ads and feel spiritually wrong for seeing it. Any help?

My husband and I could use your prayers as he just lost his job. We live in a small, rural community and aren’t sure what to do next. Please pray for a job for him and grace for us both as we navigate this change in finances. Thank you!

My husband and I are in our thirties and we are new converts. We had previously been living with his parents, but we have our own home now and even have an extra bedroom. We were using NFP to space out our pregnancies since we’ve had miscarriages in the past and we aren’t in the best spot financially.

However, we talked and came to the conclusion that we had sort of been using NFP as a replacement for birth control, which we didn’t mean to do. We also agreed that no one we know has been “ready” to have kids, but they’ve created beautiful families, and since we converted and became serious about our faith, the Lord has provided us with more than we could ever imagine. Therefore, we have decided to just give my womb to God and see what happens.

I still plan to track my cycle, but we won’t be abstaining from intimacy when I’m fertile. We are excited and nervous about what’s to come, but we are doing what we feel is right. Anyway, I’d love your prayers on this journey, and if you’ve got personal success stories about your own journeys that have been similar to ours (especially with us being in our 30s), tell me. I love to hear good things!

One and a half years ago I was diagnosed with anorexia. Due to the lack of eating, I found myself becoming a shell, not interested in anything, and highly depressed. This also meant I had no interest in any sexual sins or lust.

I have recovered now, but that comes at a cost, because now with my period back, I find myself more vulnerable to my bodily needs and desires, and today was the first time in around 2 years that I have given in.

I feel deeply ashamed because it had been so long, and now it feels like the two years I spent abstaining are now completely down the drain.

I don’t think I will be able to sleep tonight because I never can after masturbation and viewing sexual content due to the shame I feel. I can’t begin to explain how disappointed I am in myself that I have failed after such progress, but I can only pray God can protect me from future temptations.

Tomorrow is my weekly confession day, and I am so nervous and ashamed to have to confess this to my priest, as this will be the first time I have done something like this since I began to see him.

This is a very humiliating and vulnerable post, so I pray that you will have the grace to not judge me so harshly with my sins. I would love to hear advice from those who have experienced similar shame.

God bless

Hey everyone, I don't know what to make of my life anymore and am here to ask for prayers. In the past year:

Most recently last month I was sexually assaulted by my now ex boyfriend of six months in the middle of the night while I slept (I woke up to it happening). I would have never guessed that he would have ever done something like this to me, we were waiting for marriage. We'd never even really had an argument or anything serious come up over the course of our relationship despite being very close, it was all smooth sailing. He was seriously the nicest guy, my family and friends all loved him. The stress and shock to my system from everything has caused me severe health issues due to my immunodeficiency, (hives, fever, etc.. on the regular and almost nothing doctors can do to regulate it).. Still working two jobs (PhD program TAship and a restaurant job) to pay the bills. Have been sleeping on my friends couch for the past month because I wasn't able to sleep in my apartment for two days straight after the assault. Going back there soon after we replace the bed, hoping that helps with the psychological damage but I can't afford to live anywhere else.

I was a victim of an apartment fire that killed my baby kitten, maimed my other cat and burned many of my belongings while I visited my friend/hometown for the holidays over the course of one week. The one night that I happened to stay at my other friend's parents house was the night the fire happened, probably would have died if it were not for that (it happened in the middle of the night and the place basically blew up, no joke).

I moved to a different state to begin my PhD program, the thing that I had invested all of my energy into over the last five years. As soon as I moved here (literally within the first week) I was immediately stalked and manipulated by an older man in my department who was trying to get me to drop out. He very seriously almost ended my academic career, and was so psychologically manipulative to me that I still to this day have a difficult time parsing what was/is real about that whole situation and it affects my academic performance significantly. It took me several months to realize what was going on, and by the time I did my social standing in the department was screwed (and then cue the fire happening lol).

To be honest, my entire life has been like this, horrific event after horrific event usually with a 6 month window between each of the events. I just turned 23 last month. I'm not here for sympathy, I'm exhausted and if you are reading this please just pray for me. I feel like a joke at this point because my life is continuing to become more and more ridiculous in every conceivable way. I actually have a lot of friends, but it is hard to be truly close to people when your life is so silly and constantly tragic. Most of my friends do not know about many of these things that have happened to me because I am genuinely embarrassed of the extent of trauma in my life.

I pray constantly at this point, daily mass goer, I'm in such desperate need for closeness to Jesus at all times. I'd go to therapy (and I have been since the sexual assault because I have been such a wreck) but I was also sexually assaulted by a therapist as a child and had not been back since-in addition to many other horrible things happening to me in therapy. I don't know guys, I'm gonna keep trucking along but shoot a Hail Mary up tonight for me if you are reading this. It is hard to believe that things will ever get better.

I recently sponsored a girl my age in her conversion to the Church. I’m looking for some suggestions for fun hangouts and other tips on how to help her in her ongoing journey! I didn’t know her before I became her sponsor and honestly sometimes i feel kind of unworthy. We’re in our early 20s

Currently 1 1/2 months postpartum. Im breastfeeding and have no period. How do I practice NFP at this stage? Does using these ovulation test strips suffice to help avoid pregnancy while my body recovers? So confused and skeptical on how effective NFP is during postpartum and breastfeeding. Also feeling very frustrated that the church doesn’t support utilizing the withdrawal method during circumstances like this where a period or real cycle isn’t present…

If anyone has any guidance or advice please let me know!

Ladies I am freaking out.

My wedding is in two weeks and I just found out I am pregnant. My fiancé and I had a slip up a couple of weeks ago and I suppose this is the consequence of that.

I feel lile such a horrible person for being excited about the pregnancy? How do I proceed. I don't know how to cope. I am so terrified of losing this baby because I don't know if I could handle it.

Has anyone else been in this situation? Any advice?

Maybe this is a shot in the dark, but I moved to DFW about a year ago. It has been so so so hard making Catholic friends here. I am also a first year teacher at a small Catholic school. I’ve felt really lonely and longing for the genuine female friendships I had in college. If anyone knows any young adult catholic groups for women in DFW it would be greatly appreciated! 😊

Hi, I’m looking for recommendations for shops that sell Catholic-inspired gothic clothing for women. I’ve always been a bit of a dark Catholic at heart (born on a Friday in Lent, so it makes sense, lol). I love Gothic architecture, memento mori, dark Catholic art, and classic gothic horror. I’m looking for clothing that reflects that aesthetic. But I don’t want to end up supporting businesses that promote the occult or use Catholic symbols for the wrong reasons (like how satanists have subverted St. Peter’s cross). I like some of the clothes from Midnight Hour and Disturbia, but idk if they’re into witchcraft or if it even matters as long as the specific clothes I buy are respectful. Thoughts?

I was sexually attracted to a guy but he did not believe me as I was bad at expressing myself. I am inexperienced and anxious.

I am currently 15 weeks pregnant with a baby girl! We were convinced it was a boy and locked three solid name options. Now that we know it's a girl, we really can't seem to agree on what we like. Anyone have any Catholic name suggestions for girls?

Hi ladies! My husband and I hope to have kids soon, and I’d really like to be home with them while still contributing financially. I currently work from home as a project manager, but it’s a full-time, 40-hour-a-week role. I’m hoping to find something with fewer hours and more flexibility, and I’d also like to move away from the stress of corporate work.

My background is in project management and account management. I’m organized and detail-oriented, with experience coordinating projects, managing timelines, communicating with clients and vendors, and keeping budgets and reports organized. I’m also creative and enjoy hands-on projects. I’ve started experimenting with creating and selling digital printables, though I’m still very early in that process.

I definitely want something I can do from home, and I’m very open to a different industry or starting a small business. Have any of you found work that allows you to earn a meaningful income while being home with your kids? I’d love to hear what you do and how you got started!

Edit to clarify: I absolutely see caring for children as contributing to our family! I’m looking for ideas for flexible side income, such as selling products, a small business, or occasional project work I could do during naps or in the evenings when my husband is home. I’m hoping to hear what’s worked for other moms who want to earn some extra money around family life.

Hello,

I'm wondering has anyone actually used just Clearblue Marquette postpartum and successfully TTA?

I mean no cross check with BBT or PdG tests etc. Just Clearblue Monitor and that's it.

I've finally convinced my husband who wanted to use barrier and I'm a devout Catholic so obviously I don't , to use NFP Marquette as it's most scientific but he said that if we fail he's not going back to trying NFP.

This led me to extensive research on Reddit and Fb and I've noticed a lot of users of Marquette actually do a cross check if ovulation happened with Proov tests or Tempdrop etc.

I'm scared of false peaks and we're serious about TTA as having the first baby was a strain on me physically and emotionally on our marriage so we are in no space for a second one right now.

Marquette with clearblue is already a HUGE financial investment and adding tempdrop or regular proov tests to it is not manageable at present.

Also if I use progesteron test to confirm ovulation happened I read that it would be Peak+5 or even up to +10 to be sure. But that will literally leave me with no available days.

My instructor said I need to abstain from CD6 as it´s my first 6 cycles with her (Im on cycle 7 currently and still breastfeeding at night too).

But I do wonder if there´s anyone who was successful with just "simple" marquette and nothing else.

Thanks in advance to you all!

I grew up in what I would say was a stricter than normal but traditional Catholic family. I say stricter because my parents stopped me going to Protestant services (I would go to Catholic mass then afterwards a Protestant service with my friends and they came to mass a few times in support) and my parents put an end to that. They also didn’t let me hang out with any non-catholic families, although I didn’t really know any, but I’ve realized they didn’t let me go to single mothers homes either growing up because they didn’t want me to know divorce was a “thing”. Now, part of me gets it and part of me doesn’t but a lot wasn’t right and has left me confused about the church to be honest so I left for 13 years. Well, now I’m trying to come back as a twice divorced, single mom, who’s more than rough around the edges (and that’s what I’m willing to anonymously share….so eeesh)….what I’m wondering is if that’s a normal Catholic thing to keep kids away from single moms. I won’t be offended if it is, especially if for younger kids as I know a lot of things I was sheltered from for longer than most that I’m glad I was sheltered from but I just want to be prepared.

Edit: Also, side note, if any women out there would be up for chatting privately I’d love to meet/get to know more Catholic women!! Just throwing that out there

Hi ladies! I recently moved to New York City and am hoping to meet some Catholic women and make genuine friendships.
I went to Mass today, and there was a young adults mixer afterward that I really wanted to attend, but I got nervous and ended up not going. 🥲 It seems like a lot of people already have their groups of friends, and it can feel a little intimidating trying to put yourself out there when you’re new to a city and don’t know anyone yet.
I really want to build a community rooted in our faith, find friends to go to Mass with, explore the city, grab coffee, go on walks, workout classes , etc. I’d especially love to meet other women who are also looking for genuine Catholic friendships.
If you’ve been in a similar situation, how did you put yourself out there? And if you’re in NYC, I’d genuinely love to connect! Please feel free to message me if you’re also looking to make Catholic friends. ❤️