Hello! I 20F recently dropped my best friend of basically my entire life. She's been there for a lot and in highschool we were super close. But after graduation she did a complete 180 and now I just don't think it's going to work out anymore. (TW: mentions cancer)

Holly and I have been having issues. Some backstory: I am saving money to move out of my parents' house and get my own place. Holly has zero problems living at home and prefers it to even thinking about being on her own. And Holly loves shopping and wants to plan all these shopping trips and buy expensive matching outfits and all these brand-name things. Whereas I would prefer to work more and save up more of my money, and Holly didn't like that. She wanted to go shopping the week before the incident. And lately I've been saying no, I need to save money. Holly proposed a shopping trip once a month. Then wanted to go on a shopping weekend to the capitol of our state, and spend the entire week shopping and buying expensive things and going out to high end resturants. The problem? I'd be driving the entire time because Holly's parents (reminder she's 20F) dont allow her to drive in cities. But she drives around in big cities to get to college anyway. Anytime we hang out It's always me driving unless we're in our small hometown. She doesn't pay for gas, and on more than one occasion has gotten upset when I haven't bought anything matching from the high end stores. This leads to our incident, the week before I said no to going to the state capitol. My aunt went into the hospital shortly after the 4th of July because she had been feeling weak and just wrong. (Timeline of the week this was monday)

Then the news returned that the doctors think she might have a type of cancer. And she was sent to a bigger hospital a few hours away for more testing. She was assigned a team of doctors and she was diagnosed with a particular strain of leukemia. She was Diagnosed on a Tuesday, but it wasn't officially well official until Wednesday afternoon after additional tests. It was devastating, and to make matters worse this is the exact same strand and type that our great grandmother died from. I hadn't told Holly this yet. Now the day of the incident was Friday, we had agreed on going out to lunch at a cheap spot.

The Incident. We get to the resturant, I walked, and she drove. Holly then went off on a tirade the second she got out of her car. And Holly shut me down anytime I tried to talk. We get in, we order food. I listen to Holly vent about her home, it wasn't anything bad. (Won't go into detail because it's nothing important and not mine to share). Then Holly went quiet and asked me how my week was. And I told her I was upset about my aunt being sick. And I said while fighting back tears that my aunt has terminal cancer. Holly without missing a beat says this quote "oh I'm happy because that means I won't have to see her at (place of work) anymore, I'm sick of her" and she smiled. She was wearing a cancer sucks shirt. Then Holly went on a rant about her mother. She offered me a ride home after. I didn't say anything for the rest of the meal, and I tried to shut down the ride saying I wanted to walk back to my home, it was a nice day. Then I ended up giving in because I wasn't in the mood to aruge. Instead of taking me home, she took me to the local coffee shop then got upset when I didn't want a drink. Then she took me to the gas station on the edge of town, and ignored me asking her to take me home. Holly finally took me home after getting gas and snacks in the gas station. I went home, and my stomach couldn't handle the food anymore. I told my parents what Holly had said. It's been 2 months since, and Holly hasn't apologized. But tries to text me randomly and even talked badly about my aunt to me over text. And got mad when I didn't respond. I haven't done anything with her or talked to her since. AITH because I stopped talking to her?

Last week I flew from Europe to the US. Basic economy ticket, 9.5 hour flight. I’m prepared to be uncomfortable but this experience was next level. I was seated in the aisle seat and started to recline at the beginning of the flight. Immediately, the woman behind me tapped my shoulder and said “please don’t recline, I’m trying to work on my laptop”. She seemed flustered so I wanted to be nice and decided to sit my seat upright again and watched a movie/read a book for 3.5 hours. At this point, my back is starting to hurt and I want to nap so I begin to recline my seat. The lady immediately taps my shoulder again and I ignore her and hope for the best. She then gets out of her seat and says to me to please sit my seat up because she’s working. I told her I’m sorry but I kept my seat upright for her for 3.5 hours and I need to rest now. (Mind you, she never once said thank you for that). She gets increasing upset and tells me to “have some humanity” and “we’re all on this flight together”. I said yes exactly, and I want to recline my seat now. Another person in her row needed to get back in their seat so I returned it to upright to let them through. What happened next was crazy. I go to recline again and this lady literally holds my seat up with her body and is shoving the seat forward to prevent me from reclining. I turn to her and say stop doing that and she gives me this huge eye roll and flicks her wrist at me to go away and turn around. This shoving back and forth goes on for another minute. At this point I’m fuming. I HATE confrontation but this is absurd. I go grab the flight attendant and tell her I’m having a problem with this person. She immediately gaslights me when the flight attendant arrives and says she didn’t do anything etc. Flight attendant reclines my seat for me and kinda looks at us weird and walks away. I’m feeling insane at this point. Lady shit talks me for hours but I’m reclined at this point but so worked up for the rest of the flight. When we land she tries to push past everyone but we don’t let her (all of us are close to missing our connections) and we’re literally in the back of the plane. Get to customs and she pushes through everyone and cuts the entire line. Piece of work. So AITAH for not keeping my seat upright for 9.5 hours so this person could work?

Me (18) female and my mother (45) female are having an argument about a car she bought for me. Now the car she bought is the car I’ve always dreamt of having, it’s a 2007 Volkswagen Beetle, a Polly pocket car if you will. She found it on Facebook marketplace for 4.5k and bought it without telling me, she called me and said she had a surprise and that she bought the car I told her I had wanted.

I never asked her to buy the car for me I simply said that if I ever did get a car that would be the car I’d get, I already have a car, a Nissan 2010. Now here’s the issue I’m having, she bought the car without telling me, until after she bought it, calling it a surprise she had for me, then she dropped the bomb on me, that now since she bought the car I would have to pay it off and work for her until I payed her back what she spent on the car.

Honestly I’m very upset about this I think it’s ridiculous, I never once asked her to buy me the car and even if I did I would have saved up the money on my own and bought it for myself once I had the money rather than be in debt to my own mother over something I never asked her to get for me. I appreciate her buying it for me but I do not agree that she has trapped me in a position where I have to answer to her hand and foot whenever she needs me to go work. For example I went to work with her this past week, taking everything she sent my way since I have no choice now. I made about 456 dollars and she took half of that so I only got 228 dollars of that money.

I do not think it’s fair, I did not ask to be in debt, I did not ask her to buy the car for me, and now I’m stuck working for her whenever she pleases and I’m not even making the full amount I’m working my butt off for?

So I told her that I wasn’t gonna have it, and if I had known she was going to use the car as a way to force me into working for her till I pay it off, I’d rather her sell the car because I do not want it. I could really careless about the car itself I don’t mind waiting and saving my own money to buy it on my own, but I refuse to work and not be getting my full pay check for the hours I have worked. I just started university and if I’m working for the money I expect to receive the full amount for my expenses and I’d rather her keep the car for herself or sell it because once again, I did not ask for it and now a car that I was so happy about is my biggest burden, a burden I had no say in.

On a side note I’d like to add that I am also required to pay for the fixtures they’re doing to the car which roughly is coming around to an extra 3k, fixes I also did not ask to be made to the car.

Also I’ve tried to reason with her and say that I’ll pay it off little by little like $100-150 of my paycheck but not half, and she refuses to accept that and says we already agreed on half my pay check, which I has agreed to at the time but didn’t know that it would be this much of a loss that would leave me with little to no money to survive off of.

So AITAH??

Hi everyone. Thank you to everyone who commented on my first post. I read almost all of your replies, even the harsh ones. I said I would update after our family meeting this weekend, so here it is.

Quick recap: I (28F) live with my husband (30M) and his mother (55F). Three weeks ago, my MIL asked for a DNA test for our 4-month-old son because he “doesn’t look like our side of the family.” I asked my husband for distance, and he said he couldn’t leave his mother alone.

A lot of you were split. Some said I was overreacting. Many said I should never take the test. But after a lot of thinking, I decided something different.

I am going to do the DNA test.

Before anyone attacks me, let me explain why. I don’t need it. I have always known who my son’s father is. But I realized this doubt would never go away. Every time my son looked a little different, she would whisper again. Every time there was a fight, this would come back. I’m not doing it for her. I’m doing it so this question is closed forever.

I already asked a friend where such a test can be done, and I’m planning to book it myself. My husband didn’t push me. If anything, he would have kept everything the same and “worked it out” while I sat across from her every day. I told him clearly that I am doing this because he is not willing to leave his mother, so I have to carry the burden of proving myself.

At the family meeting this weekend, I said this in front of everyone:

“I will do the DNA test. But I have one condition. When the result comes back and it matches my husband, and it will, I will move out and live in a separate home with my husband and my son. And my mother-in-law will not be moving in with us.”

The room went silent. Some relatives said I was being harsh. My MIL said she “only wanted peace of mind.” I told her peace of mind should not come at the cost of destroying my dignity.

I also decided one more thing. When my son grows up and becomes mature, I will tell him the truth about what happened, that his own grandmother once doubted his mother and made her go through this. I won’t lie about it, and I won’t hide it.

At the very least, I want her to feel regret for what she did. She may never apologize, but when that report comes back, she will have to live with it.

So, AITA for making the test conditional on us moving out? And am I wrong to want my MIL to feel the consequences of her own words?

I’m turning 40 tomorrow. My best friend kinda tipped me off last week by telling me to tell my husband to check his phone…. Which he was drunk so he didn’t. I thought, well they’re planning something for my bday, yay. A couple of days ago I looked at my husband’s phone for something and he said I was going to ruin my surprise. Yay, again. Tell my friend in honesty today that I thought they were planning something. Find out my husband is “horrible” at following through and didn’t message anyone in a time appropriate manner so I did it myself to see if anyone could come to my be dinner tomorrow. No one knew, no one can including my own mom because of prior plans and the only can come is my kids, my husband, my best friend and her kids. AITA for being irked at my husband for not following through? My amazing best friend said she’d do everything including decor and all my husband had to do was invite people.

Side note, my parents were Jehovah Witnesses growing up so I haven’t had a bday party since I was 4 and I was looking forward to a little TLC.

Maybe I’m just being emotional since I’m getting old.

i was hanging out with my friend when he asked if i wanted to meet their friend so i said sure so the next day we all sat together at my friend's house to hangout and the whole time my friend's friend was always quiet and it was obvious he was struggling with something so before i left i asked for he's number and after i went back home i texted him asking if he's okay and he opened up talking about personal struggles and other stuff that is making him extremely depressed at first i didn't mind him venting to me at all but it became annoying when every conversation i have with him turn into a therapy session and i would feel bad if i didn't help so i just sit there and listen to him vent almost everyday until one day i decided to not talk to him anymore because all that venting started stressing me out and draining my energy so i sent him a final text talking about how he is extremely negative and it's draining me and I don't think i want to be around him anymore then i blocked him now my friend is mad at me for blocking him and honestly maybe blocking him wasn't a good idea now my friend is mad at me and I don't know how to fix things

update: after reading some comments i decided that i should unblock him and apologize and after a few minutes he responded telling me it's fine and he shouldn't have been so negative all the time so we are good now

My aunt has recently become obsessed with ordering expensive, modern outfits from online boutiques. She often sends me pictures and asks which designs look best because I enjoy fashion and usually help her compare styles. Last month, she sent me several dresses from a boutique she had found on social media. One particular design caught my attention because it had an elegant cut and a beautiful deep emerald-green color. I told her I liked that design and would choose it if I were ordering for myself. She replied that she loved it too and asked me to help her place the order, so I did after confirming the size and delivery address with her. She paid for the dress herself. When the package arrived at my house, where she had requested delivery because she was visiting us that week, we opened it together. The dress looked nothing like the pictures. Instead of deep emerald green, the fabric was a dull, almost greyish shade, the sleeves were completely different, and the material was much thinner than the boutique had advertised. The stitching was also uneven, and the neckline looked poorly finished. I immediately took pictures of the differences and contacted the seller to ask about an exchange or refund. My aunt, however, was upset with me rather than the seller. She said I had recommended the dress, so I should take responsibility for the disappointing purchase. I reminded her that she had approved the design, paid for it herself, and that the seller had delivered something substantially different from what was advertised. She insisted that I should pay for a replacement because she would never have ordered it if I had not said I liked it. I refused to pay, but I offered to help her pursue a refund. The seller eventually agreed to accept a return, provided the dress was shipped back within the return period. My aunt refused because she did not want to pay the return shipping cost and continued insisting that I should cover the loss instead. She has since told other relatives that I persuaded her to buy an expensive outfit and abandoned her when it turned out badly. I never pressured her to order anything, and I was the one who tried to resolve the problem with the seller. I understand that she is disappointed, but I do not believe recommending a design makes me financially responsible for a seller sending a completely different product. AITA?

My boyfriend and I have been together for three years, and until recently, I genuinely thought we were going to get married. We’ve talked about our future many times, including where we would live, how we would manage money, and whether we wanted children. He has always wanted to stay close to his family because they all live in the same town, and I’ve never had a problem with that until I started thinking seriously about my own future. For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to live abroad. I studied hard, built up my work experience, and recently found out that there may be an opportunity for me to move to another country for a better career. It’s not a guaranteed offer yet, but it’s something I genuinely want to pursue. I mentioned it to my boyfriend a few times, but we never had a proper conversation about what it would mean for us after marriage. Last weekend, we were discussing our wedding plans when he started talking about buying a house near his parents. I asked whether he would ever consider moving abroad with me after we got married. He immediately said no and told me he had no intention of leaving his family or starting over somewhere else. I explained that living abroad had always been a personal goal of mine and that I didn’t want to give it up without even considering the possibility. He became upset and said he thought I was happy with the life we had planned together. I told him I loved him, but I couldn’t promise to spend the rest of my life in one place just because that was what he wanted. I also said I didn’t expect him to abandon his family or move somewhere he would be unhappy, but I needed him to understand that my ambitions mattered too. He told me I was choosing a country over our relationship and asked why I had waited until we were discussing marriage to bring this up. I reminded him that I had mentioned wanting to live abroad before, although I admitted we should have discussed it more seriously earlier. I never told him I had already made a final decision or booked anything. I was asking whether we could find a future that worked for both of us. The conversation ended badly. He said he couldn’t marry someone who might leave him behind and that he no longer knew whether we had a future together. The next day, he messaged me saying he thought we should break up because our long-term goals were too different. I was devastated because I still love him and had hoped we could work something out. My friends are divided. Some say I should have made my plans clearer before the relationship became serious, while others say it would be unfair to marry him while secretly resenting the life I had given up. His family apparently thinks I am being unrealistic and expecting him to leave everything for me. I never demanded that he move abroad, and I never promised I would stay where we are forever. I wanted us to have an honest conversation before marriage rather than discover years later that one of us had sacrificed something important and become unhappy. Now he says our relationship is ending because I want a different future from the one he imagined. I understand that he has every right to stay close to his family, but I also believe I have the right to pursue my own goals. AITH for telling my boyfriend I want to live in another country after marriage, even though it may mean losing our relationship?

This year, i turned 18 during April and i chose to spend it all by myself and I did, my brother was extremely furious. I'll tell you why. My brother, 26, is the only one who earns in our family after my dad passed away 3 years ago. My brother isn't bad, he takes care of me and my mother. He's an ambivert person but has a problem - he always and always does everything with his friends. Watching a new movie? With his friends. Going somewhere in or out of the city? With his friends. Eating at newly opened restaurants? With his friends. And I have no problem with it, but here's the thing.

First, he plans everything with us but then at last does it with his friends. Like the movie i was talking about since i saw its trailer, was releasing. I already told my brother all of us are supposed to go and he agreed saying he'd book tickets. But by the end of the month, when I woke up my mum said he left for the movie because his friends came home and took him forcefully.

I was so angry. So during my birthday he said he'll book a private theatre for celebration but I told my mum in my room that i doubt him and I wanna celebrate everything myself. She agreed, and gave me money in advance. On my birthday, i left early in morning for a urban park, had my own mini picnic, visited a book market and returned home by evening. And I was right, because when I came home he stepped out of his room after done with his gaming. He found out what I did the whole day, said he was really upset that i celebrated my birthday by myself and was selfish.

I confronted him immediately saying that no matter what he always cancels our plans at last moment or either does them with his friends. And I didn't want to spend my birthday at home just waiting for him to finish his gaming and end up at home. My mother agreed to it.

AITA or am I really selfish?

I work in a small office where everyone has their own responsibilities and performance targets. At the end of each quarter, our manager reviews our work and gives a bonus to employees who meet certain targets. The bonus is based on individual performance, and everyone knows the criteria in advance.

Last quarter, I worked hard to meet my targets. I stayed organised, kept track of deadlines, and made sure my projects were completed properly. When the results came out, I found out that I had earned the full bonus. I was pleased because I had put a lot of effort into my work, and I had already planned to use the money to cover some upcoming expenses.

A few days later, a coworker approached me and said she thought I should share part of my bonus with her. I was confused and asked why. She explained that she had answered a few questions for me earlier in the quarter and had occasionally helped me find information for my projects.

I thanked her for the help, but I told her I wasn’t comfortable giving her part of my bonus. The questions she had answered were minor, and I had completed my own assignments and met the targets myself. I had also helped her with work-related questions several times without expecting payment or a reward.

She said I was being ungrateful and that she wouldn’t have helped me if she had known I wasn’t going to share the money. I reminded her that she had never mentioned expecting payment when she helped me, and I had never promised her any part of my bonus.

The next day, she brought it up again and suggested that I give her a fixed amount as a thank-you. I politely declined and said that if she believed her work deserved a bonus, she should discuss her performance with our manager rather than ask me to give away mine.

She became annoyed and told another coworker that I had benefited from her knowledge and then refused to return the favour. That coworker suggested I should give her something to keep the peace, even if it was only a small amount.

I spoke to my manager because I didn’t want the disagreement to affect our working relationship. I explained what had happened without asking for my coworker to be disciplined. My manager confirmed that the bonus was awarded according to individual performance and that there was no expectation for employees to share it.

My coworker found out that I had spoken to the manager and accused me of making her look bad. I explained that I hadn’t complained about her work or tried to get her into trouble. I simply wanted clarification because she was repeatedly asking me for money I had earned.

I’m happy to help colleagues when they have questions, and I appreciate it when they help me too. But I don’t believe ordinary workplace cooperation means someone is automatically entitled to a share of my earnings. If we had agreed beforehand that I would pay her for specific work, I would honour that agreement. We never had such an arrangement.

Now she barely speaks to me unless necessary, and I’ve heard that she thinks I’m selfish. I don’t want unnecessary tension at work, but I also don’t think I should hand over part of my bonus just because someone decided after the fact that they deserved it.

AITA for refusing to share my work bonus with a coworker who says she helped me earn it?

My coworker recently asked to use my computer for a few minutes because hers was installing an update, and I agreed while I stayed at my desk. She needed to check a shared spreadsheet before a meeting, so I unlocked the screen and let her work. Before leaving, I specifically told her not to change anything in the original file because several departments were using it. She assured me she only needed to review the figures. The next morning, my manager called me into a meeting because several entries in the spreadsheet had been changed, causing the team to prepare an incorrect report. Since the file was accessed through my account, my coworker stayed quiet while my manager questioned me. I explained that she had used my computer, but she immediately said she had only looked at the spreadsheet and suggested I might have changed the figures afterward. I was shocked because I had not edited the file at all. Fortunately, the spreadsheet had a version history showing exactly which account made the changes and when. It confirmed that the edits were made during the time she was using my computer. My manager corrected the report, and my coworker eventually admitted that she had changed the figures because she thought the original numbers were outdated. She apologized for the edits but said I should still accept some blame because I had allowed her to use my account. I told her that letting someone review a file was not permission to alter it or let me take the blame afterward. Now she says I have damaged her reputation by bringing up the version history in front of our manager. I would have gladly helped her correct an honest mistake, but I refuse to accept responsibility for something I did not do, especially after she tried to blame me for it. AITH?

I (19M) and my girlfriend (18F) who we will call Abby have been together for a couple months now officially. We dated early this year for about 2 months before I left for home for the university break. lets just say that I wasn't over my ex girlfriend at the time and I ended up confessing a lot of things to my ex while still being with Abby. My ex forced me to tell Abby after a few days and we broke up. She is the sweetest girl ever and only cared about if I was okay after everything and that she just wants me to be happy. After about 2 months of no contact, we all came back to uni for the semester and me and Abby reconnected. I played around a bit because I didn't know if I wanted to be a free spirit or not, but Abby put her foot down and told me that we are either getting together or we are nothing. I chose her in the end and am doing the best I can to make it up to her. I treat her like a princess and I genuinely do love her so much.

But Abby is struggling with trusting me. Which I get. But she constantly asks me if I like her, if shes enough, if Im mad at her, etc. Its kind of annoying because I try to reassure her all the time but its never enough.

Anyways, I went to a concert a few days ago and she literally made me tell her what I would do if a girl came up to me asking for my number. I told her I'd ignore them. She asked me not to give my number or socials to any girl and i told her i wouldnt, she seemed happy with that. She told me shes just worried and I told her its all chill. She dropped me off and I went and it was super fun. But, when I was there a girl came up to me and we started chatting and she eventually asked for my insta. I wasn't attracted to her really and I just thought she was cool so I give it to her. We messaged a few times since but like nothing major. Just photos from the concert and stuff.

I gave Abby my phone to play games on and the girl had messaged me just asking how I've been. Abby started full on crying saying she asked me to not do one thing and I still did it. I told her that i barely talk to the girl and that its just friendly but she refuses to listen. I feel like shes kind of overreacting and hasn't really spoken to me for like 2 days now. I feel like I can't even make friends now because Abby is insecure. I really do love her, but I feel like she has to trust me for this to work out. What do I do?

My daughter is turning 5 next week. We're having a small party at our house. My brother (32M) has a large dog that jumps on people and knocks things over. He brings the dog everywhere.

I told him he can't bring the dog to the party. He got upset and said the dog is part of the family. I said I don't want a dog jumping on kids and knocking over the cake. He said I'm being dramatic.

My mom said I should just let him bring the dog because "it's just a dog." I said it's my daughter's party and I want it to be safe and calm.

AITAH?

I'm 30F, and my younger sister, Chloe (27F), has been living with me for almost two years.

When she was 25, she lost her job and asked if she could stay with me temporarily while she got back on her feet. I had a spare bedroom, and I was doing well financially, so I agreed. I told her she didn't need to worry about rent while she looked for work.

I thought it would be a few months, but time went by, and she eventually found a stable job. She's been employed for over a year now, but whenever I bring up contributing to bills, she says she's struggling because of her student loans and car payments. I tried to be understanding, but it's getting harder when I see her ordering takeout almost every day, buying designer bags, spending hundreds on beauty treatments, and taking weekend trips with her friends. Meanwhile, I cover the household expenses and do most of the cleaning. I finally asked her to contribute toward the internet and utilities. I wasn't even asking for full rent, just something to make things fair. She refused, saying she could barely afford her loans and that I earned enough money to cover the bills myself.

What really pushed me over the edge was when she ruined my expensive cast-iron cookware by putting it in the dishwasher. When I asked her to replace it, she rolled her eyes and said it was just a pan and I was making a big deal out of nothing. That night, I called our dad to vent. During the conversation, I mentioned how Chloe kept using her loans as an excuse not to contribute. He sounded confused and told me that he and Mom had been paying her student loans and car payments directly for months. Apparently, they'd agreed to help her financially so she could save money. I had no idea. I confronted Chloe, and she admitted our parents were helping her. When I asked why she'd kept telling me her payments were eating up her salary, she said she was still struggling because she had other expenses and didn't think she should have to pay rent when I could easily afford everything.

I was so furious. She'd been living rent-free, contributing almost nothing around the house, and spending her salary on things she clearly wanted, while making me feel guilty for asking her to cover even a small bill. I told her she either needed to start contributing financially and helping with chores or find somewhere else to live within two months. She said I was being cruel and reminded me that I was the one who offered to help her in the first place. Then she called our parents, who immediately accused me of abandoning my sister over money. Mom even admitted they'd encouraged Chloe not to discuss their financial help with me because they didn't want her to feel pressured to move out. Now relatives are messaging me, saying I'm selfish for putting a roof over my sister's head only to throw her out when she needs me.

I love Chloe, and I never expected her to struggle alone. But I didn't agree to support an adult indefinitely, especially when she refuses to take responsibility for herself. So, AITH for giving my sister two months to move out after discovering that the financial struggles she's been telling me about aren't what she led me to believe?

Today, I (16F) had a heavy discussion with my bsf (16F) over a "stupidity".

We were at class, and, because we were very cramped, I decided to put my leg on top of hers. When I did, she took off my shoe, leaving me with one white sock exposed. The thing is that she threw it away carelessly and other friends took that as an opportunity to steal my shoe and hide it from me.

It reached to a point in where I had to walk downstairs to our dining room with just one shoe and walk in front of everyone, bearing with tons of people making fun of me.

I didn't truly mind it, taking someone's things and hiding it is actually a very common joke here, but the thing is that It reached a point in where I was like a goddamn doggy, begging everyone to give me my shoe.

At one point, I decided to grab my bsf's backpack and search there for my shoe, taking many things off of her backpack and her jacket even falling off.

When my bsf saw that, she rapidly got angry at me, saying "that she didn't want her things to get dirty or to get the smell of the fried food impregnated on her clothes", saying that "she didn't even know where my shoe was!". This was the thing that got me truly angry, because while she was acting all delicate and frail, I was there with one sock and getting it all dirty, all that combined with the fact that she was the one to take my shoe and then lose it carelessly made me start shaking of anger.

I mean, it's just basic logic that if you grab someone's thing, then you should take care of that thing and not lose it.

It made me even more mad because that bsf knew that I hated getting my things hidden, this wasn't the first time something similar happened. The others were shitty, yes, but they weren't actually "friends" of mine, much less knew about my boundaries, meanwhile she was my best friend who knew it very damn well.

That was my last straw. In my desperation and anger, I pulled out my phone and showed her her mom's chat, telling her "If you don't find my shoe, I'll call your mom" (For context, her mom is a really strict mom, she isn't mean or abusive but she is very strict and scolding)

She told me "I already told you, I don't know where it is!" Me: "Then find it, u started it! I swear i'm gonna call her."

This second time, she tried to "help me", she asked once and then the moment the girls told her that they didn't know she left it.

I insisted her and warned her a third time, and at this point she ignored me, so I called her mom. My call with her actually lasted 6 seconds, because my voice was actually shaking and I was about to cry from the anger.

I texted her and told her that her daughter took off my shoe and lost it. Instantly, my bsf received a call from her mom. They fought a bit, and then the call ended, once it did, her face turned into a resting bitch one (is that what you call it in english?) and started angrily telling everyone to give me my shoe back. At that moment everyone decided to comply and give me back my shoe, but she got really angry and told me that I crossed the line.

By the time I reached home, I waited a bit for the anger to cool down and then I texted her, saying that I was waiting for an apology because she was inconsiderate.

Turns out that at some point, she did know where my shoe was, and decided to hid it again, only to not told me because "she thought that another classmate picked it up already and hid it elsewhere"

It seriously made me angry, because she literally said in front of everyone that I, a few months ago, also hid her shoe, which isn't true, but people probably believed her and now I look like a hypocrite.

The thing that got me truly angry was the fact that she, my best friend, didn't care about the fact that I was so desperate, getting clowned at by and that my boundaries were getting overstepped, and then got angry at me when I looked in her backpack.

I got married two years ago. My dress was custom-made, and I spent months saving for it. It was my dream dress, and I had it professionally cleaned and stored afterward.

Three weeks before her own wedding, my sister called and said she’d “had a change of heart” about her dress and wanted to wear mine instead. She said it would be “so sentimental” and that it would save her money. She didn’t ask whether I was okay with it. She just assumed I’d say yes.

I told her I wasn’t comfortable with it. The dress is very personal to me, and I’d also planned to keep it for my future daughter, if I ever have one. I also pointed out that it would need major alterations, which could change it permanently.

She got upset and said I was being selfish, and that I was “ my wedding dress over my own sister.” My mom called me the next day and said it’s “it's only dress” and that I should let it go to keep the peace. A few cousins have since messaged me saying I’m ruining the wedding mood.

I offered to pay for part of her dress or help her find a good one, but she said that’s not the point. She isn’t speaking to me now.

I do love my sister, but I don’t think I should be pressured into giving up something this personal.

I (27M) do some graphic design freelance work. A few weeks ago, a small business owner commissioned me to create a logo for his new coffee cart. Our deal was for $400, half at the outset, and the other half after the logo files were finished. I got the money without any issues.

I presented him with three designs. He did not like any of them and wanted revisions. I gave him two revisions, which went past our contractual obligations, yet I did not demand extra compensation. At the end of that, he told me he was “going in a different direction” and stopped responding to my messages. As such, when I asked him for the rest of the money, he told me that I did not do what he expected of me, and thus, he does not owe me anything.

I let it slide. The deposit paid for my time, and I did not want to hassle him anymore.

Yesterday, I saw his coffee cart’s Instagram account. Its logo looks like a cup with steam forming a sun. This is my idea, which I proposed during the initial round. He just adjusted the font and shifted the sun a bit. Nobody will think it was just a coincidence if we put both of them next to each other.

The contract contains a clause, stating that the copyright on all designs belongs to me until the total payment is completed. So, strictly speaking, he uses my design illegally. The only thing I can do about it is to send an official notice, but then I will spend more money hiring a lawyer than the $200 that he still owes me.

What I want to do is put both of our logos together and explain the situation. Some designers I know recommended me to do that, while others advised me not to do it, as it would seem petty and could ruin a newly launched company.

I don’t want him to go bankrupt. I just want him to either pay for his use of my design, or stop using it at all.

WIBTA if I post the logos side by side?

My friend told her boyfriend she was at home but she was actually out with our group. Later she asked me to back up her story if he ever asked me about it.

I told her I wasnt comfortable lying for her and she got really mad at me. She said a real friend would have her back and now some people in our group think I made things worse than they needed to be.

I dont think I should have to lie just to protect her but now im wondering if I should have stayed out of it completely.

AITAH?

Before I start, I just wanna say I'm very sorry for making this so long. This is my first time posting on reddit.

So i'm 14, I don't have a say in anything that goes on in my home. Earlier this year, my mom let my grandma come to visit us and stay all the way up until january. Our home is only a 2 bedroom, so I had to give up my room. Currently I'm sleeping in my mom's room until new years, which means I have absolutely no privacy.

I have different bowls that I like to keep separate from the main household bowls for sensory reasons. My grandma kept using my bowls for things such as raw chicken (which made me never use some of them again because I hate anything that raw chicken has touched.) I've cried over this before, and yes I know it was extremely dramatic but it just irked me so bad. My mom scolded me for being sad over bowls, and told me I was being selfish and rude. I didn't even say anything to my grandmother, so I'm not sure how I was being selfish?

Now this isn't the main issue, but it's one of the many things that i've had an issue with. The main problem happened last night. My mom made chicken for me, and i ate a little bit at a time. Before i went back for seconds, which was only 3 wings that my mom literally said I could have, my grandma came into the kitchen and grabbed one. She didn't ask. She simply said "I'm going to taste one of your wings." And grabbed it before I could even respond. Of course, my mom didn't help me out in this situation at all, so i said nothing.

When I brought this up to my mom, she told me that I was being selfish again. She told me that my grandma always cooks for us, so I shouldn't be acting this way. My mother always says I'm selfish when I express discomfort with people crossing boundaries. For example, My brother was here just before my grandma visited (with both of them visiting, i haven't had my room for almost an entire year. it will be a year in november.) When my brother was here, he constantly used my stuff without asking. When he asked, it was fine. But sometimes I didn't want to share, because I don't HAVE to. I was called selfish any time I didn't feel like sharing, or got mad when he used my things without permission.

My mom also called me selfish when I was upset that my aunt ate my snacks TWICE without asking. My mom told me it was fine because I wasn't going to eat them anyways, but that doesn't matter. I bought them with my own money, and they weren't hers to eat.

Sorry this is very long, but anyways my mom is constantly calling me selfish just for having boundaries, and I truly can't tell if I'm the issue here.

(My mom also calls me selfish and bratty any time I display an emotion that's not joy, but that's a story for another day.)

Please be brutally honest, if you see any flaws with my behavior in this please let me know so i can work towards changing it!

Before I start this- yes, this is some highschool drama, but I'm currently the only one aware. So basically, my best friend (We'll call her L) has a crush on my other friend, (we'll call him D) and so do I.

A few terms back, L told me she saw this cute boy and kinda likes him, and when I saw him I kinda thought he was cute, too, but said he's not cute at all and we forgot about him. Well, at least I thought we did, but she brought him up again and asked me to find out his name for her, so I did, then she ended up telling some other people she liked him, and this was just around when I was starting to like him too. Now you have to know, I'll always put my best friend before me, and I knew that she could not know at all that I like him, and I told myself I didn't and even if I did I'd never get into a relationship together. Anyway, my and my other friend (Let's call this guy Z) decided we would help L win over D, since Z is friends with D. Over this time we had some friend group drama, an ex-friend told D that L likes him but at this time D didn't even know L, and L started forgetting about her crush on him. We ended up wanting to be closer with the group D was in, (Like with Z and some other friends who are guys, mind you me and L are the only girls) but out of us two, I'm the more confident one so I was telling the most jokes to them and talking to them the most, so I've built a better connection with them all, including D. Today, we moved over and say with them and just talked and jokes during lunch and at the end I ask D and another friend if they have numbers, and both say yes. So they write their numbers down for me and I say I'll add them after school, and me and L went to our last class of the day.

During this class, I'm thinking of what to save my friends as (D and the other guy) in my phone because I love giving all my friends dumb names as jokes and they all find it funny, too, when L suddenly asks me if she can just take the piece of paper with D's number on it to add him. I tell her I'll add him and then make a gc so she can add him from there with our other friend and she starts begging me. Eventually she moves on then starts begging me again for a different reason- to help set her up with him.

Just a note, I've done this before with her and another guy from our group where I'd basically start a conversation and then just let them talk where they'll eventually move to priv chat to talk, bit this didn't go well with her confessing and him saying he just wants to be friends- (they're still close) but she wanted me to do that again with her and D.

Now, I really want to help her with this, and she was saying how over the weekend she would get to know everyone (and D) better and I asked her if she'd be okay with me getting to know them, too, and she said something along the lines of "Well...I'm totally fine with you getting close to (uh, let's call him F) and Z..." then stopped talking, so I asked her "But?" and she tried to downplay it when I suddenly realized, she somewhat sees me as competition. She then started saying things like "I'm just saying, you've built a better connection with him than me" and "I just want a head start" and "You might be his type" and even "I know you don't have a crush on him, but-" and I just told her to do her work because I started feeling really bad about us liking the same guy. She said she'd pay me back somehow if I help her but I also like the same guy and I don't know what to do. Because I know she liked him first and that I probably don't have a chance but it just hurts.

Anyway, I've had him saved on my phone for a few hours now and he hasn't seen my text, but I said I'd make a gc by now so she can add him but I haven't. Idk what to do, AITA?

A very close friend of mine “Amy” is going through a divorce. Her soon to be ex husband “Tom” is a train wreck alcoholic, and they have a one year old baby together. We live in a VERY small town and Amy recently moved four hours back up to the city to be with her parents. Since she’s been gone Tom has been drinking even more heavily and likely doing powder drugs. Over the weekend Tom went to the only nice restaurant in town, was already pretty drunk, a waiter saw him with a rolled up bill, and while walking to the bathroom Tom grabbed a waitress’s ass and said “don’t you know who I am”. The owners didn’t find out until after Tom had left, but called him in the morning to let him know he was no longer welcome.

I know all this because my boyfriend is best friends with the restaurant owners. When my bf told me all this I asked if it was ok if I shared with Amy, he said yes. So I shared with Amy so that she knows how much Tom is spiraling. A few minutes later I received a text from Tom saying “If it was you…you’re not going to like the ending”. I asked Amy what she said and all she said was “what happened at X restaurant?”. But, obviously it was me. It’s a pretty clear trail of how she would have found out and how Tom is pissed threatening me. AITAH for telling my close friend about the nefarious things her pending ex husband is up to?

Okay sorry for clickbait-ish title. I am having a debate with my spouse and basically no context do you guys think this constitues a wild day?

The day summed up: getting calls from a parent and a family member about said family member getting bail and me paying for bail. This is shortly followed by 'I maybe have cancer and this is my dying wish' from above mentioned parent.

Throwaway cause everyone I know is on Reddit.

My roommate and I made a dorm rules document early in the semester that all our regular guests agreed to, things like quiet hours, no cursing, stuff like that. One rule I personally asked for is no cursing/no excessive noise while I'm there, since I value having my space actually be restful, especially during busy weeks.

Last night my roommate invited a few friends over to watch a show. He insisted it had to be that specific night because he was leaving the next day (I agreed because it's a new season of a show he really loves). I already had tests earlier in the week and had an early test the next morning, so I gave a heads up beforehand and asked everyone to keep it down and watch the cursing.

One of the guests (we'll call him Ken) immediately tried finding loopholes in the no cursing rule. He tried seeing if quoting shows counted, I said it did, because he's actively choosing to curse. He then asked if quoting the Bible counted (he's atheist, I'm Christian), I said it didn't matter, it still counts. He was also just loud in general, screaming at one point, and on top of that left trash on my desk and kept shaking my bed (it's lofted). Near the end of the night, after being asked multiple times to quiet down and stop cursing, he started whispering curses, apparently thinking I wouldn't notice since I was trying to sleep. I heard every bit of it.

This also isn't his first offense but that's a story for another time.

Part of the no-cursing rule is a $0.50 swear jar donation per curse word, or 10 push-ups (or an equivalent exercise) as an alternative. I've decided to ban him from coming over to my dorm while I'm in the room until he pays off that debt or until after Thanksgiving break.

Edit: I didn't think this would be a point of contention, but after seeing a lot of comments bring it up, I do want to clarify one thing. My roommate is fully on board with the no-cursing rule. Weeks before this incident, he mentioned several times that he wanted to stop cursing as much. Normally, occasional cursing doesn't bother me, but there have been a few times when guests came over and practically every other sentence they said was filled with curses.

When we were drafting the rules for the dorm, I was the one who suggested the no-cursing rule, and my roommate was fully on board with it. He even came up with the swear jar and wanted the fine to be over a dollar, but I talked him down and we added push-ups as an alternative to make it a bit more lighthearted.

So, this isn't me imposing a rule on my roommate that he doesn't agree with. It's a rule we discussed and agreed on together.

I 36 F have had it. Recently I was invited to my oldest daughter's birthday party. Through xs wife, I also have a son different father's. Years ago I had awful custody battles and my mom did not come to support me at all. And now my daughter asked for all of us to be there (including both my xs) and there family and friends. I hate them, they hate me. However I love my daughter and will go because she wants me there. And she asked for my side to be there as well.

So I invited all of my family, it was fine until over a week ago. My mother tells me her husband has to work and she can not go without him. She does have some illnesses. But she owns her car, and goes out with other siblings anytime she feels like it. I always told her I wanted her to be there. And wanted family support through this. Like I said I hate them they hate me. Over the last week shes come up with everything under the sun not to go.

​back story on family events. I am the only one who puts every single family event together. Then she will tell me dates and try to always make it so it works around her and her life. I am always there for her when she needs me. When she is upset and sad. When she is just bored or whatever. I dont live around the corner either. I live an hour away. When I also have put together events in the past that didnt revolve around her. She didnt show up. This event is important and I had made that very clear.

I have a fiance 40 M. He knows how much I do for everyone. And he is now very mad over the entire thing. And believes I should of just had to say it was important and then no questions asked. I just feel like its a one sided relationship. She will go out of her way for other siblings. But it seems like always excuses when it comes to me. So i told her originally if she didnt go I wasnt going to anything anymore. And she could do it all if she wanted to see the family. She tells me it was all a mess and excuse after excuse.

That made me even more mad. So i told her not to come because she clearly didnt want to. And I would be canceling all the family events I started. I sent out a message to them already. Im not saying I wont ever go see other family. Im just done with whatever she wants. And I wont be inviting her. Im tired of feeling less deserving. (The party is at the end of the month by the way)

AiTAH?

I'm 30F and recently hosted a small baby shower at my house for my first child. My cousin Brooke (28F) has a popular lifestyle account and constantly films family gatherings, often posting people without asking.

A few months ago, she posted pictures of my nursery without permission, and strangers started commenting on my pregnancy. After I asked her to remove them, she accused me of being dramatic. So, three days before my baby shower, I messaged our family group chat asking everyone not to film my face or post identifying details about my home. I told Brooke she could photograph the decorations and food, but I wanted the actual event kept private. She agreed. Everything went well until we started opening gifts. Brooke stood up and started recording me, commenting on how emotional I looked. I quietly asked her to stop, and she laughed that she was just capturing a special moment.

A few minutes later, she started filming again, and I noticed my prenatal paperwork was visible beside the gifts. I reached over and covered her camera with my hand, telling her to stop. I didn't touch her phone, but she immediately accused me of embarrassing her in front of everyone. She said she was only trying to capture memories and that I could have handled it more politely. My aunt told me to let it go because Brooke was excited about the baby, while my mom agreed Brooke shouldn't have ignored me but thought covering the camera was too much. The next morning, Brooke texted me that I'd humiliated her and ruined footage she'd planned to use. I told her she could keep the pictures of the decorations, but I wasn't apologizing for protecting my privacy.

Now some relatives think I overreacted, while others say Brooke needs to understand that not everything is content for her account. I know covering the camera wasn't the most graceful response, but I'd already asked her twice, and she'd promised to respect my wishes. So, Am I wrong for covering my cousin's camera at my own baby shower after she repeatedly ignored my request not to film me?