r/BodyDysmorphia • • Mar 12 '21

Resource Reasons you might avoid therapy - and why you shouldn’t.

434 Upvotes

The primary methods of dealing with BDD, from a medical standpoint, is medication that can reduce obsessive thoughts and therapy, mainly cognitive-behavioural therapy (or CBT for short). Many of us might be skeptic or even afraid to try it, but there is no need to be, here is why.

I don’t know what cognitive-behavioural therapy is or what happens in therapy. - Therapy is a form of treatment where mental issues are addressed mainly via talking and bringing mental issues into a place where they can be addressed and handled by the sufferer. Cognitive therapy, or talk therapy, involves talking and discussing issues and finding solutions to them together with a professional, with the goal of reducing emotional suffering. Cognitive-behavioural therapy aims at also reducing behaviour that could cause distress. This can be done with tasks or learning new ways of doing things. The work is done by the patient and no one will force you to talk or do anything you don’t want.

But I’m not diagnosed with BDD. - A diagnosis is not needed to get therapy. In some cases it can help with insurance coverage but other than that anyone can go to therapy for any reason, diagnosis or not.

I’m afraid they will think my issues are stupid or I’m delusional. - Medical professionals and therapists have seen it all. They have very good perspective and education under them. They understand what the issues are that you are describing and their main goal is to help you, not to judge you. No respecting or professional therapist would call your issues stupid. Though they may challenge you into thinking why you might think the way you do, but this is not to judge but to help you gain insight to who you are what can be changed to make you feel better. If you feel unjustifiably judged, change therapists.

I’m worried they will make me give up all grooming and self care and I will have to learn to be the ugliest version of myself. - The goal of therapy is not to make you a totally different person or make you give up all your habits. The goal is to reduce the behaviour that causes you worry and anxiety. You can still do makeup, but the goal is that you don’t feel like crying if your makeup isn’t perfect. You can still go to the gym and work out, but the goal is you don’t have a breakdown for missing a day and feeling like you gained weight over night. The aim is to find a healthy balance and reduce the things that cause you anxiety. You don’t need to become the role model of natural looks, but learn healthy balance.

What if people or my family judge me for being in therapy. - Therapy is something that would benefit every single person on this planet. Getting help is never something to be ashamed of. Anyone who makes you feel bad or weak for getting help is harbouring a very unhelpful mindset themselves that might prevent them for helping themselves, and that is the real tragedy. Always work towards your own health and don’t let others bully you out of helping yourself.

I don’t want therapy, I just want surgery or other procedures. - BDD is a mental disorder and it’s important to acknowledge that. The goal of therapy is not to talk you out of a decision but the help you understand what issues are real and which are the disorder. Therapy will help prevent you from doing unnecessary procedures that can harm your looks and to make sure you will not be equally unhappy after a procedure. Surgery and augmentation of ones looks is very rarely a permanent solution but therapy can help you build a healthy mindset where you can truly make the best decisions for yourself.

I don’t think I can afford it. - Nothing in this world is more important than your mental and physical health. Prioritise these things as much as you reasonably can. Find out how you can get insurance coverage, do you have access to support groups or group therapy that is free or look into online groups like those provided by the BDD foundation. You can always call a therapist and ask them what ways you could afford a session, many places are happy to tell you how to best afford treatment.

I have trouble opening up or it makes me uncomfortable. - Many people find it hard to honestly talk about their BDD since it can feel irrational or embarrassing. But therapists have heard it many times before, and worse. It’s important to find a person you feel comfortable with, this can take several tries but is always worth it. You can open up slowly and start with small pieces and work up to bigger issues. This is normal and no one will push you to go faster than you feel comfortable with.

I’ve tried it before and it didn’t help. - There can be several reasons why therapy might not have worked. The therapist might not have been equipped to handling BDD, the chemistry wasn’t right and prevented opening up honestly, the patient wasn’t ready to get help and work on the issues, there wasn’t enough time... having another go with another therapist is often a good idea. Also considering if medication could help is a possibility. When trying therapy again make sure you’re with the right person, you’re ready to work on the issues, you’re being honest with what the problems are and that you give therapy enough time to work.

Therapy is a fantastic tool to people suffering from BDD, and is something recommended by professionals as the primary form of treatment. If you suffer from BDD, therapy is something worth trying.

Finding a therapist

The International OCD Foundation’s therapist search.

You can choose BDD from the Advanced search option. Every professional has listed what they treat and how. They have also been verified to be licensed by the OCD foundation.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • Sep 21 '20

Resource What can you do about BDD?

457 Upvotes

There are many ways one can combat body dysmorphia. Some people are able to manage symptoms on their own, some need medical intervention or more intense periods of treatment. What ever your situation, there are ways to combat BDD.

Here are some way to combat your BDD listed in ascending order from self help to medical treatments.

Self-help:
- This can include many things. Anything from taking physical care of yourself, to reading about BDD and how it’s treated to making changes in your life that help support a stable mental health. Self help in a great tool and at the bottom of every recovery is the personal desire to better ones situation.

BDD workbook:
- Compiled by medial professionals, the workbook gives important insight to how BDD works, what triggers it and what methods you can learn to help yourself in a proven way. You’ll learn to limit your obsessive behaviour and recognise disordered thinking. This is one of the best self help tools there is.

Online therapy and support groups:
- The BDD Foundation for example offers online therapy groups that come together weekly. A free and easy to access form of therapy can be a good support in addressing BDD symptoms if there are no possibilities or need for more personal or intense forms of therapy.

Therapy:
- Cognitive-behavioural therapy, or CBT, is the recommend form of treatment for people with BDD. It can focus on what are the specific issues and triggers in you and how they can be helped. This is a form of treatment that can give great, individual help and offer support in every area of life on top of BDD.

BDD specialists:
- Though sadly quite rare, there are places and therapists and doctors who focus on BDD and other related disorders. They can give more focused advice and treatment and are often informed with the latest developments. This is a good choice when available.

Psyciatric professionals:
- This form involves doctors like psychiatrists, who can give formal diagnosis as well as offer medical level advice and give prescriptions. If you feel like your BDD is so intense that functioning in daily life is hard or you feel like you could benefit from medication, it’s a good idea to talk to also a psyciatrist as well as a therapist.

Medication:
- Because BDD is a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder, it’s symptoms can often be alleviated the same as many OCDs. Sometimes medication can be a great tool in reducing the symptoms, and combined with therapy, the likelihood of better quality of life is high. Here you can find general information of medication used to treat BDD.

Out patient care:
- If more intense forms of care seems to be needed, one option is out patient care where the patient is in a close contact with, usually a psychiatric hospital or a doctor, and usually has for example therapy sessions several times a week. This can be a good options for those who have a very hard time with daily functioning or are suicidal.

In patient care:
- The rarest form of treatment is in patient care where the patient stays in the hospital and can be given support and help daily. This often requires for the patient to be in acute risk of suicide or is unable to function in their daily life. Though this is often the last option, it’s good to know that help is available even when things are very serious.

The forms of treatment and the health care systems work differently in every country and it’s always a good idea to talk to your local doctors and professionals on what options are available to you. But know that there are many ways that BDD can be treated and alleviated. The most important thing is remembering you’re worth help and there are several ways to get it.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1h ago

Advice Needed helter skelter movie

• Upvotes

anyone else relate beyond words to the girl from that movie? aside from the way she treats other ppl ofc

idk if this makes any sense but having bdd makes me genuinely wonder everyday what can you do after you realize that there’s nothing to look forward to in life bc your own perception of yourself limits all of the ways you could enjoy life just bc you just hate the way you look

like no matter how much weight i lose, braces, 1ml filler in my lips and 0,5ml in my chin, the makeup, the clothes, the new hair color and maybe other fillers i plan to get, no matter the compliments, no matter what anyone says about me and even if it’s the objective truth at some point, nothing can or will ever change the way i see myself which is so stupid but it feels like such a prison


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 2h ago

Resource Information on BDD - Advice, criteria, self-help and support groups

2 Upvotes

Here you can find listed below general information on BDD and related foundations, the clinical classification and symptoms of BDD, advice for friends and family, as well as self-help and support groups, both in-person and online.

General information

The BDD Foundation

OCD UK

International OCD Foundation

Mind.org

Clinical classification

ICD & DSM Criterias

For friends and family

The BDD Foundation, Supporting a close one with BDD

Mind.org, How can friends and family help

Self-help

Body dysmorphia workbook by the CCI

Building self-compassion workbook by the CCI

Support groups

Online support and therapy groups

Support groups in the UK


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 6h ago

Question I don’t think I know what I look like

5 Upvotes

I’m probably not ugly at least from what I’ve experienced. I’m not hated I’m trusted, I get compliments at the bar, people buy me drinks.

If I tell anyone I think I’m ugly they get really really pissed off at me and tell me shut up.

So probably I’m not ugly. But I do think I am. I used to be ugly and fat

I was showing someone a photo of me from 2 years ago and they said I looked so different I don’t think so.

I don’t look in the mirror at all. Nor do I willingly take photos of me.

I think I’ve come to the realisation I honestly don’t have a clue what I look like.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 3h ago

Question I feel like trash all the time and ugly how do I fix this or calm the feeling.?

2 Upvotes

Idk why but I just finished college today and I was looking on Reddit posts about how you know if you’re ugly and I have a naturally mean look which I guess makes sense why I’m not approachable but it also said that no one even looking at you means you’re ugly.

I can’t accept that I am ugly I mean since I was 13 (I’m now 17) I’ve had bad acne, messy bad hair and the worst jawline which is slightly sharp but mostly round and my features just look bad with crooked teeth really nice eyes tho and a stupid disgusting nose and I hate it.

There’s this one girl who talked me today in college and I’m socially awkward but blunt and a bit rude so she was just asking me normal questions and I joked back and she did but it feels humiliating her friends didn’t seem to care well they kinda did they joked back and there have been people who have looked at me and I looked back but that’s just them doing curious glances but the worst part was that girl was bubbly and playfully messed with most people like that and said jokes like my friend said she wanted to be your friend from day one, it felt nice they were messing tho the other friend seemed more closed and kinda rude but she generally is I just idk she asked what I had for lunch and said I don’t talk enough and it did feel good but also like I was a test subject.

I don’t think I’ve ever had a crush had anyone flirt with me had anyone show mutual attraction and it hurts how do I know if I’m ugly? I mean sometimes k think hey I look prettty good but 90% of the time it’s what the hell am I? Am I even human. Like my friend isn’t even conventionally attractive he’s a normal guy like baby face guy not generally attractive yet he’s had crushes.

It just hurts so bad I thought hey looks factually matter anyone who says they don’t is lying but if I’m hideous what’s the point? I wish I was hot or attractive google apparently says that if I was those girls would be more into me or happier or more inviting, is that even true?.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 6m ago

Advice Needed Why can’t my stomach be flat?

• Upvotes

Hi all! I have a question for women. How do you all achieve a relatively flat stomach but still manage to be on the thicker side? I am 26yr, 5’9 and weigh 200lbs. I used to be skinny when in high school and struggled to gain weight. I know that as you get older you do tend to gain weight but I’ve been struggling to adjust to it. I’m honestly fine with other areas but I wish my stomach was flat. I’m not sure how to attach a photo so you guys can see what I am referring to :(


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 36m ago

Advice Needed I hate looking at myself in pictures

• Upvotes

I took photos with some friends today and I’m dreading seeing what I look like in them. All it takes is one bad photo and I feel horrendous. I pick apart every little detail, every flaw, and feel awful. I’m 30 and I’m afraid it’ll only get worse with age. People tell me I’m beautiful but I genuinely struggle to believe it wholeheartedly. There are some days i feel it and agree, but most days it doesn’t take much to suddenly feel I look disgusting. One bad angle, one bad glimpse in the window of a store, and my mood is ruined.

I’m in therapy and haven’t brought up the intensity of what I think and feel when it comes to my appearance. What has helped shift your mindset or seen things from a different perspective?


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 21h ago

Advice Needed My penis is worthless

22 Upvotes

Im almost 21. My penis is literally smaller than almost everybody's. Below the 10th percentile. Ive seen 1 person with my size with a success story. At 3.5 inches circumference im the smallest out of most people. There's nobody my size with success stories, because its so rare and I dont think its possible. All success stories ive heard are from men 4-4.5 in girth. Which is a much bigger difference in girth than it seems. Not to mention im 3.5 inches in length as well.

Im literally at the size the ai overview consistently says most women are talking about when they say "cant feel anything".

I dont even see the point of talking to the girl im talking to (19). There's a high likelihood of rejection and im already emotionally invested and a week and 1 date in. shell probably just reject me and im probably just wasting my time.

Size matters in the fact that there's too big and too small. Im in the too small category.

I keep having thoughts of just cutting it off which id never do or having the image and thoight of me just fricking hanging myself pop in my head most days of the week even tho again I wouldnt do it. Not a day goes by where I dont think of this worthless piece of garbage between my legs that makes me undesirable to most while most men don't have to worry or give a damn about it I have the though of, what if I got bottom surgery and made it a vagina? Would i have more success and love than at the size I am now?

I dont see a point in doing anything with my life. Whats the point in being successful in anything if there's still a massive hole or void in my soul that can only be filled by companionship and love and desire that I can never have?

Ik most women dont want this as even when they say they like small theyre probably talking about only slightly below average. Theyre not talking about micropenises, which is basically what I have.

Im at a loss of what to do. The one thing I want in life is love, sex, companionship, true desire, a true loving committed relationship with a partner who loves all of me, not despite some of me but for all of me. And thats such a low probability of finding that it might as well be impossible. I feel fricking worthless


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 6h ago

Question Does anyone else facial image seem to change?

1 Upvotes

Sometimes I’ll catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and, for a split second, think I look pretty. Then suddenly, I go right back to seeing myself as deformed. It’s not just my thoughts changing, it genuinely feels like my visual perception changes.

My perception of my face constantly shifts, too. Sometimes I think I resemble Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise, and other times Scarlett Johansson or the older sister from Shameless. I think a lot of it comes from being ashamed of my nose, which also seems to constantly change in size and shape when I look at it.

I also frequently perceive myself as looking masculine, despite being AFAB and never having been told I look like a man. Wearing jeans or pants instead of skirts or dresses makes this feeling so intense that I become physically nauseous and sometimes experience immediate ideation because I genuinely see myself as looking like a man.

I’ve heard hormonal changes throughout the menstrual cycle can affect facial appearance, but I wonder whether this is actually my BDD.

Does anyone else experience this?


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 7h ago

Advice Needed Tomorrow hairdresser

1 Upvotes

So tomorrow i go to a hairdresser after a long time(the last time was last year in august)

I don't like the big mirrors and seeing myself..

I also think that the hairdresser find me disgusting even tho i don't ever been to this place(it's in a different city).

How can i still go and calm down my mind right now.. so consumed with what other people think..


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 14h ago

Resource STORIES AND BOOKS about body dysmorphia

2 Upvotes

r/BodyDysmorphia • • 14h ago

Resource ON RECOVERY - Stories, advice and healthier perspective

2 Upvotes

r/BodyDysmorphia • • 14h ago

Advice Needed Anti depressants in real deformities causing body dismorphia

2 Upvotes

I heard a lot of good things about anti depressants in body dismorphic disorder however mine stems from a craniofacial deformity ( plagiocephaly ) its a deformity affecting the whole cranium and face. Will anti depressants also help with these if its a more severe deformity. Is there anyone who has severe facial deformities with expierence with these ( not asking for mild assymetrical faces etc ) kind regards


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 18h ago

Question What are some good book recs? (M)

5 Upvotes

Therapy is a must, but I’m looking for good book recs. At one point in my life I started viewing my body as a direct equivalent of my worth and I have allowed myself to live according to how I feel about my body.

I was born an artist, and when this insecurity sparked out of nowhere in my teens, my creative force stopped completely.

I miss being a child and honestly not giving a shit, perhaps it’s not possible due to the shifts in consciousness we have growing up, but I can definitely start seeing it as a vehicle rather than a resumé.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 20h ago

Advice Needed how do I fix my mind

7 Upvotes

I’m genuinely so disgusted with my face it will literally make me nauseous and hysterically cry. I feel so hopeless and feel like the only way I’ll ever feel better is if I get plastic surgery. I’ve tried to like certain features about myself but if I stare too long I start to spiral. I feel so pathetic and such a loser for my mind being this way. I just don’t know what to do.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 23h ago

Question Intensive outpatient therapy

2 Upvotes

Considering sending my daughter to intensive outpatient therapy for bdd/ocd.

It is 3 hours per day five days per week and lasts for four months. Has anyone tried this and how did it go?


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1d ago

Advice Needed My body looks horrible and disproportionate I need advice

3 Upvotes

I’ve always had severe body dysmorphia ever since I was a young girl and I’m almost an adult and I still can’t shake it. My butt is really flat while my stomach and breast are really big. My shoulders are so broad and every part of me is so uneven. I look like a mom of 3 ! I’m gaining weight but barely eating I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I tried working out it made my body dysmorphia WORSE so I stopped. I have very bad mental health because of how I look I wish I was pretty like everyone else and I have no one to talk to . How can I overcome this?


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 20h ago

Question Pregnancy BDD

0 Upvotes

Anyone struggling with pregnancy and body dysmorphia. I’m very disappointed in myself for being pregnant. I can’t even look at myself anymore and I feel miserable. I want to enjoy my pregnancy and make my baby feel loved. I feel so gross. I feel so ugly.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 20h ago

Advice Needed Don't Know if I have Body Dysmorphia

1 Upvotes

As title says, I'm in a really confusing state with my body. I've been doing a few things different with my life (won't say for respect of those who also struggle; please don't ask!) and my parents have told me I look like I've lost weight. My brother also says I've lost a lot of weight. As for me, personally, I see absolutely zero visual change and have even thought I gained it. I look back at old photos and I'm normal weight for a child instead of obese like I thought I was, and I don't know if body dysmorphia is actually *seeing* a visual difference in your body in comparison to reality or if it's just a mental thing. It sucks to say but I kind of hope it's the first one so I don't actually look like how I see myself. Can anybody tell me? I've had dysphoria formally diagnosed but not dysmorphia. Just wanting to see if I should get it checked out.


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1d ago

Advice Needed I can’t tell how ugly I am

0 Upvotes

I can’t tell how ugly I am how do I figure it out like my friends compliment me saying Bs like wow you look really good man but I don’t believe any of it at all I know what I look like and it’s not “really good” nobody besides my friends and grandma compliments me and I’ve never been hit on or anything so. And I don’t wanna post my face anywhere cus I hate my face so much already that one bad comment would probably push me over the edge.

And How do I stop being so jealous of all my friends cus they’re all tall and all of them are decent looking besides 2 of them that are very conventionally attractive do I just have to accept that I pretty much will never get as many opportunities as them and that they will live a better happier life?


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1d ago

Resource Information on BDD - Advice, criteria, self-help and support groups

1 Upvotes

Here you can find listed below general information on BDD and related foundations, the clinical classification and symptoms of BDD, advice for friends and family, as well as self-help and support groups, both in-person and online.

General information

The BDD Foundation

OCD UK

International OCD Foundation

Mind.org

Clinical classification

ICD & DSM Criterias

For friends and family

The BDD Foundation, Supporting a close one with BDD

Mind.org, How can friends and family help

Self-help

Body dysmorphia workbook by the CCI

Building self-compassion workbook by the CCI

Support groups

Online support and therapy groups

Support groups in the UK


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1d ago

Advice Needed how do you deal with agreed upon "pretty" characteristic being source of discomfort ?

2 Upvotes

to be blunt; until a year or so i looked like i was 30+ (was the case since i was 15)
Now i'm 20 and i look 20, when i tell people that i dislike being 6'/5'11, i face the "but being tall is pretty", i am wondering what can be good coping strategies


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1d ago

Resource SELF-HELP: Body Dysmorphia Workbook

2 Upvotes

Going to therapy or getting professional help is not always an option, getting help may also take some time. To help you to better understand and address BDD by yourself, we have compiled a workbook that you can do by yourself. It contains information and tasks which will help shine a light to why BDD is the way it is and how you can deal with the symptoms. All chapters are based on an official workbook by the Centre for Clinical Intervention.

The BDD workbook:


r/BodyDysmorphia • • 1d ago

Question Does surgery feel like your only hope?

1 Upvotes

I’m not encouraging anyone to get surgery I’m just asking about other people. I feel like the only thing that makes me feel hopeful about the future is surgery. I’ve prioritised that above all else, it feels like nothing motivates me aside from that.